“Shhhh, it’s okay, Tessa,” he said, letting her cry all over him. She was part of his family, and he hated to see her hurting.
Especially since he knew why.
This was on him.
He’d been in charge of protecting his people, and Paris had taken that bullet on his watch.
“What’s going on, honey?” he asked, leading her to the couch so she could sit.
“Paris and I had a fight, and I don’t know what to do. He told me to fuck off.”
Greyson was shocked.
Were they talking about the same Paris who wore glasses, he read books for a hobby, and his ties matched his pocket squares?
That Paris cursed at his wife?
It had to be ugly if he had uttered those words, and toward Tessa. She was his heart and soul. Anyone who knew them saw how much he loved her.
It was crystal clear.
“Tell me what happened.”
“He started talking about having a baby again. I’m just trying to stop thinking about it, and it’s so hard. Kat and Curtis are having a child, and you’re trying. I feel like I’m staring in a window and can’t participate in the joy.”
He got it.
Again, on him.
“Tessa.”
“I have been miserable toward him, and he thinks I’m blaming him. I’m not. I just can’t handle it. It’s not fair. We played by the rules. We did everything right. I was discarded as a child and grew up knowing I was nothing. Now life hits me with this. I can’t do it. I’ve given up hope. Nothing is working for us. I feel like the universe is trying to stop us.”
He held her.
“Tessa, it’s okay.”
“I want to make him happy, but I can’t. I’m not happy. It hurts to know that I’ll never hold a child of my own. I’ll go to baby showers and know I’ll never feel any of that.”
“Tessa, he’s hurting too. As a man, it’s hard not to be able to provide everything for your wife. Paris is really suffering over this. He came to me.”
“I know. He told me he asked. That’s what started the fight. I wouldn’t have let him go to you. I wouldn’t have let him beg for sperm. Even saying that makes my heart hurt.”
Had this been any other moment, he would have laughed at the entire conversation.
Only, Tessa was hurting.
Paris was hurting.
His family was suffering.
“Why wouldn’t you let him come to me?” Greyson asked. “Why is that an issue?”
“You gave us this home. You give us income when we work for you, and you gave us money for IVF. I feel like we’re using you.”
He gave her a kiss on the forehead. “You’re not using me. If anything, I use you and Paris. We can’t help people without you. I’ve called Paris at all hours, asking him to profile. I’ve asked him to help Sam. I didn’t know we were keeping score. Had I, then I wouldn’t have asked for your help.”
He waited for her to process that. Tessa was smart, and she’d been a damn good agent. He knew she’d work through it if he left enough crumbs for her to follow.
“We love helping you.”
“So why is it so odd that it’s reciprocal?” he asked. “Why wouldn’t I want to help two people I consider my family? Because I supply money? Well, that’s bullshit, and you know it.”
She wiped her eyes.
“I just feel horrible.”
“You’re reading into this too much. Paris wanted to give you the one thing he can’t supply himself. It had to hurt him to know that he’s lacking in that department, Tessa. Still, he called me, had me meet him face to face, and asked me for help.”
Tessa listened.
“I can’t ask you to give me a child, Greyson. You and Emma are trying…”
He had to tell her.
It was time.
“We’re pregnant, Tessa. Emma is having my child.”
It hit like a ton of bricks.
Tessa could barely breathe. She stared at him, and her lower lip quivered.
“I see.”
“Tessa.”
She began weeping.
He could see how painful this was to her. Greyson had to make the choice. Emma wasn’t happy about it, simply because this technically would be his child, and they hadn’t really decided one hundred percent.
It looked like he was up to bat, and he only hoped his wife wouldn’t flip her shit.
He was doing this for the Archers. When he left, he’d call his attorney, and have Delilah begin drawing up the legal contracts. He had conditions, and they’d have to agree.
Or it was off.
Greyson held her as she wept. When she finally slowed down, he made his move.
“I want you to come to our house tomorrow. I want you to meet us in the morning. Can you do that?” he asked.
She kept crying.
“Tessa.”
She looked at him and nodded.
“I’m going to give you the donation. I’m going to help give you a child. God help you. The Croft genes are a hot mess. You’re going to have your hands full. If you get some gay baby who comes out in feathers, blame my brother.”
She laughed a little. “I’d still love a feathered baby. He would be mine.”
And that was why he trusted them with something so precious to him. Greyson never slept around, and before his wife, he never went dick diving without a shitload of protection. Before his wife, he didn’t want his sperm out there in the world.
Now he was going to trust two people with something so precious to him.
He wiped her eyes with his thumbs. “You and Paris give us unconditional friendship and love. You are our family. You both mean the world to me. When I was asked to hand in my badge, Paris tanked his recertification. You walked away. FOR ME. Who does that?”
“Family.”
“Exactly. Who do you ask for a sperm donation if your husband can’t provide it?”
“We’d ask a brother.”
He let that sink in.
“Chris is Emma’s brother, and so is Dimitri. Both men are mine also. Why is it so hard to think that Paris is mine too? I love your husband, and I’d do anything for him. If this is what you need, then you have it.”
“But Emma.”
“She loves you too. Ask her.”
Tessa wasn’t sure she would be so magnanimous if her husband was the one being asked. She only hoped he wasn’t lying. If she got her hopes up, and there was another blow, Tessa wasn’t going to survive it.
“Now, I need you to do me one favor.”
“What?” she asked.
“Pull your ass out of this funk. If me jerking off into a cup will give you a long life of happiness, so be it. Fix this with your husband. Tell him you love him, and be at my house tomorrow morning.”
“I’ll tell him…”
“No. I want you to tell him we have work. He came to me once and sacrificed his pride. It’s your turn. Tomorrow, you have to be the one who sacrifices for him.”
She kissed him on the cheek. “We are so blessed to have you as our family.”
Greyson held her hands. “You’re mine, too, Tessa, and you will always be mine. Paris matters, and not because I’m the reason he was shot.”
“You’re not.”
He smiled at her. “That’s my cross to bear, but it doesn’t matter. I’m going to help you both, and I’m going to be blessed by watching you build a family. That’s precious to me.”
“Thank you, Grey.”
She hugged him.
“Now clean yourself up, slap on some makeup, and go fix the shit mess you caused. In this family, you own it, you fix it, and you get past it.”
She would. “I love you.”
He grinned. “I am a charmer. If your child gets my slickness, well, you are welcome.”
She snorted. “And Emma is a lucky woman. So am I. I found a sweet man, just like she did.”
Greyson squeezed her hand.
“Now go fix him. He’s hurting, too, an
d Paris doesn’t deserve it. He’s been handed shit too.”
She got up, felt better, and knew she could do it. It was time to take care of her husband.
She’d been neglecting their marriage.
And that was on her.
* * * G r e y s o n C r o f t * * *
Dimitri unlocked the door and let her in. The second they cleared the doorway, he was waiting for a comment.
There was none.
“Would you like some coffee?” he asked. “I doubt that Greyson will be long.”
“I’m sorry,” she said.
He didn’t budge. Dimitri didn’t know why she rattled him, but she did. He was trying not to focus on her, but it was so damn hard.
“If I could go back and undo it, I would have. If I could tell the past me to ask you for help, I would.”
He stared at her. “I don’t understand why you lied to me. I tried to help you.”
“You scare me.”
There.
It was out there.
“Why?” he asked. “Why do I scare you? I’ve never been anything but gentle. I’ve never even yelled at you at work. I’m having a hard time understanding why you felt the need to lie and betray me.”
Did he not see it?
She could see the killer in him. Marissa could feel the air around him ripple with his anger and strength. It was terrifying to face him down.
He was dangerous.
“Why?” he asked again.
“You’re Dimitri Gideon. Do I really have to go there? When you carried me up those stairs…?”
He waited.
“You freaked me the fuck out. Okay? My fight or flight kicked in, and I fled. Had I known it would lead to this...?”
“You stabbed me! I should be the one freaked out,” Dimitri stated. “You were aiming for my fucking throat, Marissa! You had no intention of pulling that knife. You wanted to kill me!”
“I know! Like I said, I was scared. I thought you’d hurt my sister, and she had to come first. I’ve let her down, and I had to find her!”
She began pacing, and he made sure to keep her in front of him. Really, he didn’t trust her.
At all.
“How do I fix this?” she finally asked, stopping in front of him.
“I don’t think you can.”
She began crying.
Jesus.
This was NOT what he was expecting. Dimitri didn’t do well with crying women. He’d raised girls, and that he got, but with this one…
He wasn’t sure what she was going to do next. He preferred predictability.
With her…
There was none.
He couldn’t read her. While his gut warned him it was all an act, his heart was breaking for her. He’d had to save his sisters.
He got it.
He did put a knife through his father’s throat. She was living a parallel life with him, only he was good at killing.
She was barely able to plan it out.
“I wish I could go back weeks and stay. I wish I had the courage to tell you about what was going on in my life, but you’re unapproachable. You scare people.”
He thought about it.
Emma seemed to be able to approach him.
Greyson did too.
Hell!
Tessa upstairs even could.
Maybe it had something to do with her childhood. He knew shitty. They’d all lived it.
“Don’t cry,” he offered, pulling the handkerchief from the pocket of his suit.
“I don’t know how many times I can tell you sorry, so maybe if you just stab me, too, we can get past this.”
He was horrified.
“I am NOT going to stab you.”
“It’ll make you feel better.”
“No, it won’t.”
She sat on the couch. “My sister, the ONLY person I have left in the world, is gone. My mother didn’t care about us, we were abused and molested, and now Julie is gone too. I’m afraid of finding her dead. I’m tired of fighting, Mr. Gideon. I have nothing left. I want to give up.”
That he got.
He was about there, himself.
If not for Emma and the previous night, he would have been a nightmare to deal with. She’d bought him some time.
“I wake up each day and wonder why I was put here. I’m desperate at this point to find the truth. Last night, I was furious that you’d touch a young girl. I walked into that room expecting to find some man and there you were. Then I saw you, and I snapped. Here was this man who I thought was decent, and it pissed me off. You weren’t decent. All of the sudden, the only thing I knew to be true was wrong too.”
He had news for her.
“I don’t have sex with children.”
“But you hire hookers.”
“I do. It’s wrong, and I know it, but finding anyone who will see me for me is hard. Look at you. You said you’re afraid of me. Why? I’ve never hurt you.”
He had a point.
“I don’t want to be afraid of you.”
“What do you want?” he asked.
“I want to find my sister alive. I want to have one more day with her, and I want to stop being afraid of you.”
“I will never hurt you. You stabbed me, and I didn’t even fight.”
She pointed at the bump on her head.
“I had to knock you out. I didn’t slice your throat, or kill you. I was defending myself from a crazy woman, wielding a blade.”
She laughed.
“I needed that.”
He did too.
“I’m not dangerous to people who don’t deserve it. I’ve never hurt anyone who didn’t ask for it, and when I hire a girl, and she wants out, I get her out. ‘Aquarius’ is proof of that, and you know it.”
Okay, he had a point.
She did know it.
“Can I ask you something?” she asked. “It’s important.”
He waited, unsure what it could possibly be. “Okay.”
“Are you in a relationship with Emma Croft? Are you some kinky threesome?”
He was a little taken aback.
How to answer that?
“Uh, she’s like my sister, and he’s my best friend. I don’t poach. Why?”
“I needed to know.”
“Again, why?”
“For this.”
She moved toward him, and she kissed him. Her mouth found his, and the kiss was explosive. She climbed onto his body, and her hands moved through his shoulder length black hair.
Now she wasn’t afraid.
Marissa knew she owed him this. When she stabbed him, he hadn’t hurt her, and she had to trust him. If he was going to find her sister, Marissa wanted them on common ground.
What wouldn’t she do to save Julie?
This was nothing.
As the kiss intensified, Dimitri didn’t know what to do. His whole sense of well-being was thrown off balance.
At first, he was shocked.
This woman was hot, and then she was cold, and then she was hot again.
He was off guard.
But her mouth…?
Jesus H. Christ.
Her mouth was doing something so sinful to his, and he desperately wanted to feel. He wanted to experience what everyone else took for granted.
She was touching him.
And he wasn’t paying her.
She was kissing him.
And there was no fear.
In that moment, he was just like every other man in the world, and he got lost in that alone. Dimitri was finally normal.
His arms went around her, and she settled into his body. As they tumbled back and made out on the couch, there was this sense of euphoria. It was as if the cage was being opened.
Dimitri didn’t feel so empty.
Maybe two broken people could make a whole. Maybe what he was looking for had been right under his nose the entire time.
He moaned as she bit his lower lip. Slowly, she pulled away.
“T
he day you carried me home, that’s what I wanted to do. I didn’t want to run. I wanted that moment.”
He couldn’t think.
“I wish you wouldn’t have run. This was much more pleasant than the other option.”
She laughed. “You’re funny.”
“Oddly, you’re not the first person who told me that. I’m beginning to believe it.”
There was a huge smile, and she batted her eyes at him.
Dimitri was screwed. In that moment, he got lost. Marissa and her charm did him in.
She was beautiful.
He was lost in her brown hair, and how it felt against his fingers. It looked different, like she had recently changed it, but it didn’t matter.
For the first time in his life, there was a woman kissing him who didn’t have an ulterior motive.
He took a chance.
As Dimitri moved closer to her mouth, a part of his internal warning system was going off. It was screaming, but he wanted this one piece of normalcy for once.
Here was a woman he didn’t have to pay.
He didn’t have to have sex and pretend it was just with some woman he picked up in a bar. He could build an attachment, and he didn’t have to be worried.
His heart skipped as his mouth found hers again.
She held on, even as his one hand started at her ankle and slid up her leg.
Slowly.
A chill rushed through her.
“Mr. Gideon,” she whispered.
“Miss Pierce.”
Dimitri knew what he wanted, and he was pretty sure she did too. After all, Marissa was sitting in his lap, and there was no doubt that he was aroused.
Her fingers went to his shirt, and she unbuttoned the top one, and his breath hitched.
His hand slid further up her leg, breaching the hem of her skirt. Marissa’s flesh felt so warm and inviting, that he knew what was coming.
He had to have a piece of forbidden fruit.
Her mouth found his, and the kiss was deeper than he’d ever felt before. She assaulted his senses with her tongue and lips.
He moaned.
God!
It felt so good.
As she shifted, straddling his hips, he let her take control. If she feared him, then so be it. He would show her he could be gentle.
He was human after all.
As she rubbed against him, his brain went on auto-pilot. His hands were now on her thighs. As they slid further up, he had handfuls of glorious ass, and he went back there.
Paid Justice (Croft Family Mob Series Book 3) Page 15