"And there it is," he said. "What choice do I have?"
"Maybe we could sneak past all the Fire Guards." But even as Rella said it, it sounded foolish.
"You don't believe that," he said, but there was no mockery in his voice.
"I can't just let this happen. We have to think of something."
"Quiet," he said. "There are guards stationed outside this room." He stroked his graying beard. "I can think of something, though. This room is shielded, but the rest of the palace is not. How good is your Blue/Purple Fireweaving?"
"Good. But I can't get a message back to Tarileth. It's too far."
"Do you know anyone a bit closer?"
"I do," she said, bouncing with excitement, but she kept her voice low. "I can get your message to her, and then she can pass it on to whoever you want."
"My son Deril. If I know him like I think I do, he's doing everything he can to find me."
"I'll tell her to get the message to him. What do you want me to say?"
He stroked his beard. "Let him know that I am here in Atarin's palace, alive and unharmed, but that I am being used as part of a plot to free Halarik. Repeat the details of this plot as I told you."
"Don't worry. I know the details. I also know we have only a few weeks."
"Yes, the anniversary. Make sure Deril knows that."
"I will," she said. "But isn't there some way we can stop this? Can't Deril do something to keep them from freeing Halarik? The thought of him returning terrifies me. After six hundred years, he might have gone insane."
"I agree with you," he said. "I've told Atarin he same thing, but he doesn't care if Halarik is insane as long as he shares his goals." He frowned. "Unfortunately, there's nothing we can do to stop this. The only way would be to find another Sunlord, but a Sunlord doesn't become one until they use their weave to restore the sun for the first time, and that can take years of training. Right now, we have no prospects."
"We can't give up. Maybe Deril can rescue you."
He laughed bitterly. "Our entire army couldn't get into Haladel, much less this palace."
He fell silent awhile, looking away from her.
"Are you all right?" she asked.
"I'm sorry if I sound so pessimistic. This experience has taken a lot out of me." He met her eyes. "But know this. You've given me a little hope. Perhaps there is some way Deril can rescue me. Perhaps there's another Sunlord we haven't discovered. But don't blame yourself if you aren't able to help me."
"I'll do everything I can," she said, and she meant it.
"Then go. The guards might check on me soon."
She gave him a quick bow and retreated to the passage, which she closed with another Firelord's weave. Soon she emerged on the other side, took a seat on her bed, and performed the Blue/Purple weave, contacting Kae.
Who is this? Kae sent. Her thoughts sounded sleepy. Is it you, Rella?
Yes, it is, and I have a very important message for you.
Chapter 29: Fugitives
"Where do we go now?" Kadin said, staring off into the darkness.
Faina had done a Yellow casting, producing a tiny ball of light, which made her face look pale. "I'm not sure where we can go. We're fugitives now."
Kadin looked down at the rocky ground. "I guess I should've thought about this."
"You did well enough to get us out of there. I can't say I'm sorry about that."
"I still can't believe I killed him," Kadin said. "It seems like a dream."
She looked away. "You need to hope it stays that way. Once the reality of it hits you, you're going to question yourself. You're going to feel terrible."
Kadin scuffed at the ground with his shoe. "I'm not so sure. He did deserve it."
"You still killed a man," she said. "That changes a person."
"Maybe," Kadin said, but he didn't believe it. In fact, the more he thought about what he'd done, the more he felt proud of it. Andric had preyed on the weak, on people he could control. Wasn't it only fair that such a man paid for his crimes?
Kadin thought of his father again, and felt a hot stab of anger. The man deserved to die as much as Andric. After all, if Kadin's father had been a Sunweaver, he would have treated people the same.
"We should head back to Illindel," Kadin said.
"They'll be looking for us there."
"What about your crime lord? Won't he help us?"
"I don't want to go back to him," she said.
"What choice do we have? We need protection, and he can provide it."
"Maybe you're right," she said, staring off into darkness. "We can try at least."
But her voice lacked conviction.
Kadin and Faina took a path that kept them well away from the plantation and the main road back to Illindel. Hours passed, and Kadin's feet began to ache. Their path was taking them toward his home, close enough they could make a brief stop there.
Close enough Kadin could make his father pay.
Around sunrise, the short stone fence came into view. Kadin stared over that fence, toward the small stone house in the center of the farm. Fury boiled within him.
"Is this where you lived?" Faina asked, a little hesitantly.
"Yes. My father's there. He's a lot like Andric. He needs to pay for what he's done."
"Don't do it, Kadin. Don't even think about it."
"Why not?" he said, rounding on her. "He deserves it. All these years, I swore I would make him pay for the way he beat me, the way he took advantage of my helplessness. I'm not helpless anymore. I can make him feel pain like nothing he's ever experienced."
"Don't you hear what you're saying? This isn't you, Kadin. You're still dealing with killing Andric. Don't put another murder on your conscience. You might like the idea right now, but you'll hate it later. Trust me on this. Please."
"I'm doing this," he said, heading toward the farm's gate. She tugged at his arm, but he pulled free from her grip. "Stop me if you want, but you'll have to try harder than that."
She called out, but she didn't restrain him. He stepped through the gate, his pulse pounding in his ears. Faint voices came from ahead as he strode toward the center of the plantation, pushing his doubts aside. This was a moment he'd dreamed about for years. He couldn't let anything stop him.
At the center of the farm, his mother and father were working together. They looked up as he approached. His mother's eyes widened, and his father's expression became severe.
"What in the core are you doing here, boy?"
"I escaped."
His father stomped toward him. "And you decided to come back here? Are you insane?"
"Maybe," Kadin said. "But I'm not the weak, useless boy you sold into slavery. Not anymore." He held up a hand, did a Yellow casting, then showed them the light at his fingertips. "Do you know why the Sunlamps always went out around me?"
"I don't care," his father said. "Now leave before you make it happen again."
"I'm a Sunweaver," Kadin said. "You were right. Mother must have slept with a Sunweaver at some point." He stepped toward his father, who backed away. "Do you know what an Orange casting does?"
His father's expression sank, and his eyes went wide. "Pain. Torture."
"Exactly," Kadin said, relishing the power he had over his father. "It's time you paid for all those years of beating me, of treating me like I was nothing, like I was useless. People like you are disgusting. You take advantage of those weaker than you. But not anymore."
He pointed a finger at his father and performed the Orange casting. His father fell, screaming and writhing on the ground. Kadin kept the casting going, putting as much power into it as he could. When he let it go, his father was whimpering.
"Kadin, stop!" his mother said, tears constricting her voice. "You don't want to do this."
But he did. He performed the casting, his entire body trembling with anger. His father screamed and screamed, looking at Kadin with pleading eyes. Kadin ignored the plea, keeping the casting going as long as he
could. Nothing had ever felt so good.
Ralin and Tyrine had shown up now.
"Kadin, you don't want to do this," Tyrine said.
But he could barely hear her protests, barely register anything but the anger flowing through him. He did the casting, putting everything he had behind it. By now, his father had stopped screaming, and he lay there, moaning, his eyes glazed.
All sound stopped. His eyes closed. Kadin doubled over in exhaustion, sweat covering him despite the chill in the air. His entire body trembled.
"I hope you're happy, Kadin," his mother said, glaring at him through tears. "Your father's dead."
"He wasn't my father, and he deserved it."
"No one deserves that," Tyrine said. "What is wrong with you, Kadin?"
Kadin continued trembling. "How can you defend him? You saw the way he treated me. You all did. He was a monster!"
"You will regret this," Ralin said, eyes narrowed in anger. "They'll execute you."
Kadin barked a laugh. "They would have done that anyways."
He turned to leave, his stunned family staring at him with suspicion and loathing, but then he glanced back at his mother. "Who is my father, then?"
"I'm not telling you. You don't deserve to know after what you've done."
Kadin said nothing. He turned and strode away, covered in sweat. As he made the long walk back to Faina, the knowledge of what he'd done trickled into his awareness. Killing Andric had been a moment of pure, unplanned anger. Killing his father was a premeditated act.
As he returned to the fence, he became numb. It felt more than ever like he was walking in some kind of dream. Or nightmare. The air felt cold and empty, and tears came from his eyes. Slowly, his trembling subsided, and his thoughts stopped racing.
At the gate, he came to a stop, using the fence for support. All these years, he'd wished he could kill his father, but he'd never expected it to feel like this. Even now, so soon after the act, he could see the look in Tyrine's eyes. He had destroyed her image of him. No matter what happened, they could never again be what they were before.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. Faina.
"I can't believe you did it," she said.
Kadin said nothing, leaning harder on the short stone fence. Try as he might, he couldn't keep the tears away. He pushed through the gate, then sank into Faina's arms. She held him awkwardly, as though she didn't know what to do.
"We shouldn't have come here," she said. "Not so soon after Andric."
Kadin lifted his head to meet her eyes. "What am I, some kind of monster? I might feel bad about it now, but when I was doing it, I enjoyed every second. I enjoyed seeing him suffer. It only seemed fair after everything he'd done to me."
"I told you, Kadin. Doing that kind of thing changes you."
He wiped a tear away, trembling so much he could barely stand. "We should get out of here."
In subdued silence, they marched away from the farm, toward Illindel. Kadin no longer cared if the Sun Guard arrested him. He deserved execution after killing his father. Those moments felt like they belonged to someone else, like some dark force had taken hold of him and made him act. He didn't want to think he could do such a thing.
The longer they walked, the more he wished he could take it back. Maybe his father had been terrible to him, but he hadn't just hurt his father. He'd hurt his mother. He'd hurt Tyrine. Faina wouldn't meet his gaze now.
Soon they reached Illindel, but Kadin didn't feel any better. He walked in a haze, following Faina's lead, and he no longer cared if Faina's old crime lord helped them.
"How did you get over it?" Kadin asked as they walked through a rundown section of town, where the stone buildings were crumbling and people didn't stop to chat.
Faina kept walking. "I didn't. I still haven't. Don't expect it to be easy."
"What if it's worse for me? You killed people because you were forced to. I killed people because I wanted to, and nothing will change the fact that I did it."
She sighed, looking away. "I don't know how it'll work for you. You'll have to do the best you can. I know that isn't very encouraging, but what else can I say?"
Kadin struggled against tears. Why hadn't he thought about the consequences of his actions? Aralea taught that murder was the greatest sin. Had Kadin sentenced himself to eternity in the core? Did it matter if he thought his murders were justified? Would he get a reprieve because he felt remorse?
Did any of that matter? Kadin had proven himself a monster. Maybe it would be best if he was executed. Then he couldn't do it again.
Faina stopped at the entrance to an alley. "This is the place."
Kadin blinked away his tears and stared into the alley. "Doesn't look like much."
"Most of the place is underground. Hopefully the guards will let us in."
Kadin heard the doubt in her voice, but he didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore. He followed Faina down the alley, until they reached the entrance to a large warehouse. Two men stood at the door, watching them approach with narrowed eyes.
"Who are you?" demanded the one on the left.
Faina looked pale. "It's me, Faina. I'm back."
The guard on the right looked at her. "It is you. You've grown up a bit." He turned his sharp gaze to Kadin. "And who is this with you?"
"Kadin. He's a friend."
"There might be a problem here," said the first guard.
"Why?" Faina asked, turning paler.
"You two are wanted criminals. You know Nalir's policy on wanted criminals."
Faina's voice was unsteady. "Can't you at least let us see him?"
"We can do that much," said the second guard. He opened the door to the warehouse and led them inside. Kadin followed, his stomach churning as they passed stacks of crates piled as high as the cavernous ceiling. The crates seemed like they formed a maze, but the guard knew where he was going. At last, he reached a door far on the other side of the warehouse.
They stepped through this door, then down some stone stairs. The room they entered next looked nothing like the warehouse. It was warm and inviting, with dozens of Sunlamps and cushioned chairs. The walls and floor were made of stone, but there were also carpets. This was a level of luxury Kadin had not expected.
"He's a very successful crime lord," Faina said.
"What did the guard mean about wanted criminals?"
"It's Nalir's biggest rule," she said. "You get caught, you're on your own. He can't have people associated with him getting in trouble."
"Then I'm guessing he won't help us?"
"Probably not."
The guard strode to a door at the side of the large chamber, passing people going about their business. Some looked up as though they might have recognized Faina. She responded with nervous smiles, keeping her attention on the guard in front of her.
After the guard knocked, Nalir called them in. Kadin followed Faina, glancing around in fear. He didn't like the idea of meeting a crime lord. Yes, Kadin was a criminal himself, but he was different. He didn't do it for a living.
Nalir sat behind a wooden a desk, a rare luxury. He looked up at them with a frown. "I was wondering when you'd come back to me, Faina. Sit."
There was no humor in his voice.
Kadin's legs trembled as he took a seat in a wooden chair, praying that the crime lord wouldn't ask him anything. Faina looked paler than ever, squirming in her own chair.
"I was hoping you'd return to me sooner, before you destroyed your life. Now I'm afraid I can't help you. You're an escaped slave, a Fireweaver, and part of a murder. I would be insane to take on that risk." He turned to Kadin. "The same goes for you."
Faina had tears in her eyes. "Isn't there something you can do to help us?"
Nalir scratched his short black goatee. "I can give you some advice. Get out of Illindel. It's too small. They expect you to be here. You might be able to get lost in the sheer size of Hyrandel. Then, of course, you could always go to the Frozen Lands."
"I'm not goi
ng to the Frozen Lands," Faina said.
"Then Hyrandel is your best option. I wish you luck." Nalir gestured for them to leave, and Kadin followed Faina out, feeling more downcast than ever. The guard led them out of the crime lord's headquarters, leaving them on their own.
"We need to be careful," Rella said as they walked out of the alley. "The Sun Guard knows what we've done. The sooner we get out of town, the better."
"Aren't you upset he didn't help us?"
"I never truly expected his help. I thought he might do something, but that was only a distant hope."
"Then what do we do now?" Kadin asked.
"I have no idea."
"We might as well try going to Hyrandel."
They walked the city streets, peering into every alley, expecting to see Sun Guards. Were their descriptions all over the city? How big were their bounties? They'd killed a Sunweaver, so they were more than the usual runaway slaves.
Toward the edge of the city, they encountered Sun Guards. They were blocking one of the streets leading out of the city. Had someone alerted the Sun Guard?
"What do we do now?" Kadin said, stopping in the middle of the street.
"We'll have to try another route."
But when they turned around, their path was blocked. Another group of Sun Guards was closing in on them, swords drawn. Kadin froze, glancing around in panic, his legs trembling. There were no alleys to duck into, no routes past the Sun Guards. Kadin might have been a Sunweaver, but he couldn't hope to escape so many.
"There's nothing we can do," Faina said.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought us here."
"I agreed to come. It's my fault too."
There was no more time for conversation. The Sun Guards had reached them.
"You're under arrest," one said. "Come with us."
They seized Kadin and Faina, wove shields around them, and led them to the edge of the city, where a horse-drawn wagon waited. The Sun Guards shoved them into the closed wagon, and two Sun Guards stepped in to watch over them. Kadin looked down at his knees.
Soon the wagon began rattling along the rocky road. Their guards didn't speak to them, and Kadin didn't feel like talking anyways. He felt like he deserved this. Faina didn't, though. There had to be some way he could save her. He couldn't live with the idea that he'd freed Faina only to have it end in her execution.
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