By the time he’d finished, Ben had served his own breakfast but left two toasted bagels with a heaping portion of eggs for Maxine and Drew to devour. “By the way, Captain likes ketchup on her eggs. And I set the toaster back to light just so you can warm them a little,” Ben said. “Without burning them.”
“Thank you,” Drew said, pouring himself a small glass of orange juice as they waited on the coffee pot. Damn…he had to order a new one. This old clunker just didn't do the job quickly enough for his tastes. “Listen, Ben, do you have a few minutes? I...well, I got up early with the hopes that I could catch you. I want to talk to you about a few things—if you have time before work.”
Consulting his phone for the exact hour of the day, Ben said, “I have a half hour before I have to leave. And if it’s about Max, I’m always ready to talk.”
“Dining room?” Drew suggested as he gestured toward Ben’s plate.
“Perfect.”
Ben had to clear a spot upon his grandmother's antique table before sitting down to eat. He and Maxine had christened that big old hunk of mahogany as the “Mail Box”—a place to dump anything and everything that was slipped into the slot on their front door which included the barrage of menus from every single restaurant in the neighborhood. One great thing about living in New York, they were never at a loss to order food, and it continued to amuse Ben that even with the Internet making delivery so easy, local eateries continued that tradition of sliding menus under the door.
“So what’s shakin’, Broadway Bacon?”
Drew cocked his head in dismay. “Ben…”
“You say that just like the Captain does when she’s pissed off at me,” he laughed, then bit into his toast. “Damn, this is some fucking awesome marmalade, dude…”
“You’re welcome…”
“You’re perfect—for Maxine…” Ben continued to tease. “Seriously, what’s up?”
Eyes trained on a newspaper flyer that had expired over a month ago, Drew began to fold and crease the edges. He was nervous.
“Everything alright with Max?”
Looking up, Drew smiled. “Yeah, it is…” he said. “Mostly…”
“You’re worried about her,” Ben prompted.
“That's why I'm here right now,” Drew admitted. “But before I do something stupid, I wanted to talk to the one person who seems to know her best. That's you, Ben…”
“Drew?” Ben shoveled a forkful of eggs into his mouth and chewed quickly. “Define ‘stupid.’”
“I…” The coffee pot beeped alerting them that their brew was finally ready. Drew stood up immediately. There was no way he could get through this conversation without his morning dose of caffeine. “I’ll get it. Milk, two sugars?”
“Black, and three…”
“A man after my own heart. Be right back.”
When he returned with two mugs of coffee, Drew traced his thumb around the rim. He had so much to say to Ben and so little time. “I went ahead and made some appointments for her today. A doctor who specializes in eating disorders—out-patient. A psychiatrist who can handle both her grief and her self-esteem issues. A nutritionist recommended by the physician…”
“Well…fuck…” Ben removed the napkin from his lap and dropped it down to his empty plate then took a huge swig of coffee. “That’s quite a tall order for Max here…”
“I already know it’s too much,” Drew said. “But she’s sick. We both know this. And we both know that she needs help beyond what she’s already received.”
“I will tell you, Drew, that her father saw to it that she had the best care available in Pittsburgh, and they do have some world-renowned hospitals there…”
“I know that, Ben, but she’s here now. And the shrink she was seeing seemed like some quack from what she told me.”
“He was just supposed to be monitoring her medication,” Ben explained. “He was a little closer to home. It was easier for her to travel to him. But I agree. I even told her that he was an asshole.”
“I guess I’m just asking for your support here…someone to back me up if she fights me.”
“At least you realize that she just might fight you,” Ben said. “My one concern is that she can’t possibly pay for—”
“I’m taking care of that. At least until her health insurance at work kicks in.”
“You know you’ll get an argument over that one, too…”
“Let her fight me.”
“Drew, I appreciate what you're doing for her, but as her best friend, I have to say,” he began, “you're moving awfully fast here.”
“I don’t see it that way,” Drew insisted. “When I care, I’m passionate. If I didn’t give a rat’s ass about her, I would have been gone already. It’s that simple.”
Fuck, this was way too much for Ben to process at such an early hour. He’d always been Maxine’s champion, and while he wanted to trust Drew’s intentions, he couldn’t stop himself from questioning.
“You’re going to talk to her when she gets up?” Ben asked. Stupid question. Of course, he would.
“Yeah, and her first appointment is at noon. I figure that allows us some time to argue. And for her to have some breakfast.”
“OK, I'm just gonna go out on a limb here and say it…” Ben stood up, carrying his dish as he readied to head off to the kitchen sink. “Drew, don't fucking hurt her. I might look like a wimpy dude, but fuck around with Max, and you'll see how strong I am. We're like family to each other. I love her with my entire soul. And I am viciously protective of her well-being.”
Raising his coffee mug, Drew said, “Glad we’re on the same page, Ben. I can be that way, too.”
“Please be good to her,” Ben begged. “She’s been through so much.”
“I know she has…” Drew said. “And my only intention here is to make her life a little easier to manage. She’s sick. She needs help. I’m trying to find it for her.”
“And Drew, if you need my help today, please let me know…” Ben said. “I apologize for being so harsh. I really do appreciate what you’re doing here. I just worry about her on all fronts.”
So do I, Ben, Drew wished he could convince him. So do I…
“Why don’t you give me your number in case she starts kicking and screaming?” Drew suggested and pulled out his phone.
“I can do that. And text me later to let me know how it’s all going.”
“I promise you, I will.”
Once Ben was out the door, Drew took a seat on the sofa for just a moment to gather his thoughts before he delivered breakfast to Maxine. He already knew that his well-intentioned plans could go very wrong. She might just kick him out the door and tell him never to return. Consciously, he knew he’d stepped over the line, but even Ben supported him. She already knew that she needed help. He was merely attempting to point her in the right direction.
Drew had managed to convince himself of his good will. Now he had to prove himself to Maxine. Fuck, this wasn’t going to be easy. However, he couldn’t procrastinate for one more minute. They had a very busy day ahead of them…if she agreed to his suggestions.
Dragging himself from that old cumbersome couch, he lumbered along to the kitchen to heat up a little something for Maxine to eat. Just for fun, he decided to draw a smiley face with the ketchup right on top of the helping of eggs. He hoped that might break a bit of the ice.
“Wake up, sleepy little one…”
“Mmmm…” She stretched but didn’t open her eyes. “You’re the reason I’m so tired, Mister.”
“I think you managed to exhaust yourself last night,” he said as he set their coffee mugs on the nightstand then crawled into bed beside her with one single plate and two forks. “Food. Eat.”
“Well…yes, Sir…” she rubbed her eyes with her tiny fists.
“We're not playing right now, but a good girl nonetheless…”
“Aw, you made me a smiley face!” she giggled. Oh, that laugh—that darling sound—could thaw even the c
oldest soul. “Ben must have been up. He knows that I like ketchup on my scrambled eggs…”
Fuck, he would have walked the nearly two miles across the park in the September morning rain, sans umbrella, to get her caviar at Zabar’s if she wanted it on her damn eggs—anything to get her to eat.
“Um…Ben made your breakfast…but the artwork is mine.”
“Silly Sir…” she leaned over and puckered her lips, only to meet his sullen gaze. “What’s wrong?”
“Eat, Maxine…”
Reluctantly, she did just as she was told. She was a little too excited to bother, but she forced the fork into her mouth and chewed dutifully. Nothing much mattered at that moment but Drew.
Although they’d discussed their play, she wanted to explore their early morning rendezvous further with him. Just the notion that they'd covered many lessons in just a couple of hours nearly left her feeling dizzy that morning. These quick glimpses that he'd offered her into his world brought her a greater understanding of what he ultimately needed in a relationship. While she found unexpected pleasure in his devious games, there was still room for conversation.
In truth, her deadline loomed heavily over her head and upon her heart. She had a mere seven days to prove to him that she could accept his Dominant side. Time was ticking away far too quickly.
“Seven days…” she thought out loud.
“That decision isn’t completely up to me, Maxine—think of it as a joint venture.”
“What if I’ve made my—”
His finger tapped softly at her lips. “Hush, little one. We’ll talk on Friday night.”
“So…are you going to tell me why you look so glum?”
“I’m not…”
“You know, Drew, I may be a virgin, but that doesn’t make me oblivious,” she said, only half-teasing. “You’ve got something on your mind right now. And I want to know what it is.”
“How about that bagel? There are starving, displaced New Yorkers living elsewhere in the country who would kill to have that right now…”
“Is that supposed to be equivalent to the guilt speech they gave us in grade school when we wouldn’t eat our peas at lunch?”
“Yes, and no poking around at your food…”
He knew that he couldn’t force her to take in too much. Her stomach had likely shrunk, and he had to take this slowly with her. Otherwise, she just might throw up for real, and he’d never forgive himself if he were the cause of even just one episode.
When at last she'd cleared away enough to satisfy Drew's request, she handed the plate over to him to finish, and then leaned back on her outstretched arms. “I enjoyed last night…”
He raised a curious brow but hesitated to smile. “I didn't frighten you?”
“Only by breaking into my apartment,” she mused.
“Again, let me say, you looked so very beautiful—all wrapped, bound and knotted—and struggling in your bed,” he said. “Quite enjoyed that, Maxine.”
“How can you muster such self-control?” she asked. “You can’t keep me a virgin forever…”
Finishing up the last of her bagel, he pondered her question but decided to leave her hanging. “When—and if—I deem you ready.”
She kicked her feet beneath the covers in exasperation. “You’re making me crazy here, Mack…”
However, Drew couldn’t allow her diversions to distract the matter at hand. The moment he dreaded had arrived, and there was simply no way to bow out of a discussion that he wasn’t so fond of having. However, the minutes passed quickly. He’d made appointments for her. He had to reveal his plans for their day.
“So…as I mentioned…I did some research last night...”
“Research…on my issues?”
“Yes, little one,” he said. “And I pulled a few strings…and managed to wiggle you in to see a few people today…”
Silence fell between them, and Maxine avoided his eyes. Tracing the toile pattern on her top sheet, she considered his suggestion, touched by the fact that he’d worked so hard to help her as quickly as he possibly could. However, in her subconscious, Maxine wasn’t so sure that she wanted the help. She found comfort in her behaviors, regardless of her rational thoughts warning her of the depths into which she could so easily sink again. She needed her comfort zone right now—living in a new city, starting her first real job and embarking upon a relationship for the first time in her life.
“I guess I have no choice in the matter,” she whispered.
“You always have a choice. Don’t ever think that you can’t voice your concerns to me.”
“I just didn’t expect this—right now. I thought that maybe I’d have some period of adjustment here…some time to settle in…before I worried about all that.”
“You don’t have time to waste, little one.” He placed the breakfast plate to the side, then moved across the bed and wrapped his legs around her. Those eyes darkened to a deep marine blue, imploring her. “Look at me, please?”
Anguish filled her sigh, and grudgingly, she turned to face him. Sincerity bore into his every word, and the traces of fear that splayed over his face—the wrinkle of his lips, the tightening of his jaw—met her gaze with desperation.
“I’ve set everything up for you. I’m going with you so that you don’t have to face this alone. And you don’t have worry about paying a dime for any of it,” he continued. “I know what Ben thinks you should do, and I bet your father would say the same.”
She endeavored to climb out of his embrace, but he’d entangled their limbs so carefully that she found herself trapped in his labyrinth once again.
Memory flooding with the remembrances of the day that her dad and best friend had staged their own intervention, she couldn’t fight her tears. Just moments ago, she was so happy with Drew, but now, he’d forced her to meet her ugliest secrets. She needed to flee—to hide herself away from him.
Yet his tenderness called her to return…
“You can fight me all you want, but I won’t sit here and allow you to self-destruct,” he said, his fingers tangling into her hair. “You know, Maxine, we’ve not made any commitments to each other. If you can walk away, so can I…”
Her heart stung with the whip of his words. Now she felt as if she were treading in treacherous waters. The threat of losing these beautiful moments they’d shared together in just three blissful, but frenetic days left her wallowing in woe. He couldn’t possibly leave her simply because she refused to acquiesce to his orders.
Or he could stroll out that door immediately, never to see her again.
Now she could see his dominant side creeping over into other areas of her life, and that scared her. She didn’t want to give up total control to him. He promised her that they would make decisions together. Strong-arming her with ultimatums wasn’t necessarily the way to her heart. However, as he held her tightly, refusing to let her go, she suddenly recognized the sincerity in his plea.
“Drew…”
“Here, little one,” he said, wiping her tears away with his shirt. “Don't cry…”
“But I’m so terrified—so confused…”
“And I fucking hate to hear you cry…”
As she filled her lungs with a quick gulp of air, she couldn't think, and she answered him without weighing the consequences of damaging her pride. “You'll go with me?”
The misery that besotted her pretty face left Drew feeling weak. “I wouldn’t dare leave you alone,” he promised her.
“How about…” She stumbled over her words and through her thoughts. “How about if I agree just to go today—just to try all of this out.”
“Look, I know this is overwhelming. And if there’s something you don’t like, just tell me. Don’t you see what I’m trying to drive home here with you? I don’t want to force you into anything that makes you uncomfortable. Especially not with something as important as your health.”
“I’ll give this a try, Drew—for you…”
Adamantly, he sho
ok his head. “No, Maxine. This has to be for you…”
“I-I’ll try…”
At that moment, it was all that Drew could ask of her.
Chapter Twenty-One
That afternoon proved nothing short of taxing for Maxine, draining her of all energy. The mad rush through all of her appointments brought her to a momentary standstill.
As he promised, Drew found her the best specialists in all of New York City. She’d endured a full physical exam, bloodwork, and a lengthy evaluation on the state of her mental health.
Oddly, though, she found some comfort in her conversation with the psychiatrist. Dr. Blum wasn’t so quick to judge Maxine, and she understood that grief exacerbated the issues that Maxine had pushed to the side for too many years. Yes, she’d lost her mother and continued to grieve her daily; however, that didn’t negate the years Maxine suffered through the taunting and malicious acts of bullies. One tragedy brought forth those closeted emotions and throttled her mind into overdrive. All of her angst had come full circle, and Maxine’s mind dealt with it all in the form of her eating disorders.
She walked out of Dr. Blum’s office and into Drew’s open arms, smiling through her tears. Exhausted though she might have been, she’d found a new courage within herself. Somehow—some way—she would muster the strength to muddle through. Conquering her eating disorders would certainly be a grueling process, but she had to hold her head high to face those challenges.
“You alright, little one?”
Sniffling, she opened her tired, reddened eyes wide, and nodded. “I’ll be OK,” she insisted. “You OK?”
“My mood seems to fluctuate with yours over the last couple of days,” he said, somewhat offhandedly.
Fingers entwining with his, Maxine gave a strong pull to his hand and looked so penetratingly into his eyes to find the warmth of empathy. This battle of life—she allowed herself to think fleetingly—they just might conquer together.
WEAKENED: The Manhattan Bound Series Book One Page 25