by B. B. Hamel
“Go ahead,” he says. “We won’t talk about this again. I’ll play nice. But the warning is there. Think about it.”
I turn away and leave his office. It feels like exiting the den of some slimy creature. I feel used and dirty and disgusting, and I wish I could take a shower.
Instead, I’m wearing clothes Jacob bought for me and I feel like I can still taste him on my lips.
I head back to my desk and sit down at my computer, head reeling.
It’s incredible how quickly my mood is shifting. This morning, I felt invincible, lighter than air, happier than I’ve been in a long time. Just being with Jacob was like a gift, and I didn’t want to leave his arms for a single second.
Now though, I’m afraid of what this all means. I’m afraid that if this comes out, I’ll look like a whore and my professional reputation will be destroyed. I know Karl won’t hesitate to do it, too. He’s the kind of man that revels in the destruction of others, and I bet he gets some special perverse excitement from hurting women. He strikes me as the masochistic asshole type.
I want Jacob and I know he’s doing his best for me. But I’m afraid of when that’s going to end and he’s going to leave me alone like everyone always does. I’ve never had a man stay by me when things get tough, and I’m used to it by now. It’s part of why I’m so self-reliant. I don’t want to give too much of myself to another person and risk losing all of it.
I can feel myself giving in to Jacob, and it scares me. I don’t know where it ends.
For the rest of the day, I do my work. I chat with Darlene at lunch, I say hello to my coworkers, and I keep my head down. I don’t message Jacob, and he doesn’t message me.
And it scares me how much I want to see his name pop up in my email or on my phone.
17
Jacob
I’m more furious than I’ve ever been in my life.
This is all happening so quickly. I know that my control over the company has been slowly eroding over time, but I had no clue how quickly things were shifting toward Karl’s point of view.
All day, I stew in my office, planning and trying to figure out where to go from here.
“Can’t you just fire him?” Clay asks me, leaning up against the wall and looking out the window.
“Not that easy,” I say. “Members of the board protect him. They can override me if it comes to that.”
“Are you sure they will?” he asks.
“Maybe,” I say. “But I can’t risk it. If they do decide to override me, basically all of my authority is gone at that point.”
“So you’re stuck with him.” Clay sighs, shaking his head. “He’s such a vindictive fucking prick.”
“No kidding.” I watch as Clay moves away from the window and sits down in front of my desk.
“You still have our support, you know,” he says. “Far as I’m concerned, this is your company.”
“Thanks,” I say to him. “We just need to convince everyone else now.”
He grins. “You make it sound simple.”
“It’s not.” I sigh and stretch. “I need some way to discredit him. Make his whole plan look flawed…” I trail off, shaking my head.
“You’ll come up with something. You always do.”
I hope Clay’s right. I spend the day banging my head up against the wall, trying to come up with some semblance of a solution to this problem, but I can’t see it. From my perspective, the board simply prefers Karl’s way of doing things, and I have to either give in and accept it, or I can move on.
I don’t want to move on and I don’t want to accept it. There has to be a third way, I just need to find it.
The afternoon comes and goes. I have a couple meetings that don’t last long, and otherwise Minnie holds my calls. I stay locked up in my office, staring out the window, trying to reason with myself, trying to figure it all out.
“You staying late?” I look over and Minnie is standing in my doorway.
I shrug. “Guess so.”
She frowns. “Don’t wear yourself thin,” she says. “Go home. Get some rest.”
“I’m fine.” I look back out the window.
“It’s six, you know,” she says softly, before leaving and closing the door behind her.
I look at the clock, surprised. She’s right, it’s already six in the evening. I am a little hungry. Most of the office is probably gone by now as I stand up and slowly gather my things.
Instead of taking the car, I decide to walk. I like to walk through the city sometimes. The crush of post-work traffic is already starting to abate, although there are still plenty of people out. The sun is strong and clean, although the wind is a little crisp as I walk slowly past second-hand stores, stationary places, fancy bars, expensive workout boutiques.
I didn’t speak to Sofia at all today. I don’t know why, I don’t have a real reason. I was too upset and too obsessed with work stuff, but now that I’m out of the office and on the street, I can’t help but think about her again.
I don’t know what this is going to mean for her. If Karl does somehow get more power than me in the company, I’m afraid he’ll fire her or do something worse. I’m afraid he’ll try and destroy her simply to get back at me for resisting him. Karl’s that kind of guy, and although she didn’t ask to be involved in any of this, it’s too late to go back. I can’t undo what’s been done. He’s aware of this relationship, and he’s going to use it against us as soon as he can.
That only motivates me more. I need to do something about this, if not for myself, then for Sofia.
As I’m walking, a high-end antiques shop catches my eye. In the window is a gorgeous, simple necklace with a thin, almost gossamer silver chain and a basic diamond pendant at the end. On a whim, I go into the shop and buy it, not worrying about the price.
With the necklace in my pocket, I catch a cab and ride it to Sofia’s apartment. I get out and walk up her front stoop. I ring the bell and wait.
“Yes?” she says over the intercom.
“It’s me,” I respond.
There’s a short pause. “Jacob?”
“Yes,” I say. “I want to see you.”
Another short pause before she buzzes. I push open the door and walk up the stairs. Her apartment door is slightly ajar so I walk right in.
She’s standing in the kitchen, a glass of wine in her hand, frowning at me. “I didn’t expect to see you,” she says.
I cock my head at her. “Why?”
“We didn’t talk all day, I guess I thought…” She trails off, shrugging.
“Something happened.” I walk over to her and stop, the island counter between us. “The board’s taking Karl’s proposal.”
She doesn’t seem surprised. “What’s that mean for you?”
“Means I have less time to make something happen,” I admit. “But I’m not finished yet.”
“Good.” She sips her wine and I can feel something’s strange between us. There’s a tension that wasn’t there this morning.
“I brought you something.” I reach into my pocket and take out the necklace.
Her eyes brighten a little. “Where did you get that?”
I shrug. “Just some shop on the way over. Put it on.”
She takes it tentatively and clasps it around her neck. It looks perfect hanging down between her breasts, just inside her cream-colored blouse.
“You should know something,” she says quietly, looking down at the counter. “Karl called me into his office. Told me to end things with you or he’ll fire me.”
I stare at her, surprised as hell. “He straight up said that?”
“Yes,” she says, not meeting my gaze.
“That fucking…” I shake my head, at a god damn loss for words. “He’s scum. You know that?”
“Of course,” she says. “But what if he actually does it? I mean, what if he tells people? Jacob, it’ll destroy me. The way people treat women who have affairs with their boss, I don’t know if I can survive it.”
“Sofia,” I say, stepping toward her.
“Wait,” she says. “I just don’t know what to do.”
“Listen to me.” I walk over to her and press her back. She looks at me, surprised, as she bumps up against the countertop behind her. She places the wine glass down as I take her hips and hold her chin up, making her eyes meet mine.
“I told you I’d get you through this,” I say softly. “I brought you into it. You didn’t ask to be in the middle of it, but you are. And I’m going to make sure you’re okay.”
“How?” she asks quietly. “The board is going with Karl’s proposal.”
“Don’t worry about that,” I say. “I’ll figure it out. Just understand that nothing’s changed.”
She blinks a little and nods once. “I believe you,” she says. “But I’m still worried.”
“I know.” I kiss her lower lip. “I’ll take care of you.”
She sighs and kisses me. I hold her like that, tight against me, feeling the warmth of her body.
It’s like a drink of water for a dying man. This kiss is exactly what I needed. I was floundering all day, lost in my own anger and misery, trying to figure out some way to get around all the fucking red tape and politics threatening to drown me. But this here, this is pure and good and right, and I know that I have to get past it all. I have to do it for Sofia.
I let her go and step away. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” I say.
“Where are you going?”
“Home,” I answer as I walk to the door. “I have some work to do tonight.”
“Okay.” She watches me go, idly fingering the necklace. “Wait, Jacob.”
I pause at the door and look at her. “It’s going to be okay.”
She looks at me for a second and nods. “Yeah. Okay.”
“See you tomorrow.” I leave her apartment, shutting the door behind me.
I head back downstairs and out into the night, heading to my apartment. I have some calls to make, some favors to call in. But I’m not down and out, not yet at least, and I’m going to keep fighting until it’s over.
18
Sofia
I’m torn as I come into work the next day, Jacob’s necklace dangling between my breasts.
I was ready to run away, or at least I was afraid that he was going to run away on me. I had all these negative thoughts, and that meeting with Karl scared the crap out of me, and yet… as soon as Jacob shows up at my apartment, all of that is gone.
Kissing him was exactly what I needed. It didn’t take all of my fears away, but at least it reminded me of how good it feels to be with him. I’ve never touched a man like him, such a dominant and serious man. His eyes cut through me every time he looks in my direction and I feel that tightness in my chest as my heartbeat picks up, fluttering and skipping along.
It’s desire, pure and simple. But I don’t know if that desire means something more, or if what we have is purely physical.
The weight of the necklace he gave me is reassuring. It’s the first gift he’s given me that’s entirely without function and isn’t sexual. He gave me clothes, but I needed those for work. This necklace is something else. It means he was thinking about me, and wanted to do something nice for me even though it wasn’t expected of him.
It makes me feel special. It makes me feel like he might actually give a shit.
I’m thinking about him all morning and I’m not ashamed of it. Karl leaves me alone, doesn’t bother to come out of his office, and that’s fine by me.
“You look happy,” Darlene says as I’m grabbing a coffee from the break room.
“I guess,” I say to her, shrugging and smiling.
“What is it?” she asks. “Got a new man?”
If only she knew, I think to myself. “Just in a good mood, I guess.”
“Well, good for you.”
Back at my desk, I’m lost in thought. I’m getting work done, but it’s only secondary to the feelings that are swirling around inside of me.
Around noon, I get a text. I pull my phone from my bag and turn on the screen.
“Are you wearing it?” It’s from Jacob.
I type back to him. “Which thing do you mean?”
“The necklace, though if you’re wearing the vibrator…”
“I’m wearing the necklace,” I confirm with a smile.
“I want to see it. Take lunch and come to my office.”
“Right now?” I ask, biting my lower lip.
“Right now,” he confirms. “You’re still doing what I say.”
I hesitate a second. It’s right around lunchtime for me, though I usually eat with Darlene. But forget it, I can skip one meal. She won’t mind. I’m sure she’ll read too far into it, like she always does, but whatever. I think she’s a good friend. I doubt she’d go talk about it with Karl or something crazy like that.
I grab my bag and stand up. I quickly walk to the elevator, heart hammering in my chest. “On my way,” I send to Jacob before slipping my phone into my bag.
I ride the elevator up to Jacob’s floor and head back to his office. Minnie smile as I approach. “He’s waiting for you,” she says. “Go right on it.” She’s standing up and grabbing her things.
“Going to lunch?” I ask her.
She nods, glancing at her watch. “Got a hot date with a new sushi place down the street.”
I smile at her. “Have fun,” I say.
“You too.” She smiles back and heads off.
I pause for a second. Did I detect a little knowing smile from her? No, I’m probably just being paranoid. I push open Jacob’s office door and head inside.
He’s sitting at his desk and he looks up as I enter. A smile crosses his face, genuine and real. “Glad you came,” he says, standing.
As soon as he comes around the desk and I catch the look in his eye, I know why I’m here. I step back until I run up against the door, but he just keeps coming, a small smirk crosses his lips.
“Why do you look nervous?” he asks.
“I don’t know,” I admit, but I am nervous. I’m a little afraid of him. Of what he can do to me.
“You don’t have to be scared,” he says softly, stopping inches away from me. “I just want to see you wearing my necklace.”
I bite my lower lip and go to lift it up out from my blouse, but he stops me. Instead, he reaches up and unbuttons my top slowly until it hangs loosely in front of me.
He looks at my chest, the necklace hanging down between my breasts. I’m wearing only a black bra and I swear he can see my heart beating.
He moves back a step. “Now, take off the rest of it.”
My eyes widen. “What?”
“I wanted to see you wearing the necklace, and only the necklace.” The smile on his face is maddening. “Now, do as I ask.”
I hesitate, but only for a second. “Yes, Daddy.”
I slide off my blouse and let it fall onto the floor beside me. He watches with that smug grin. I reach back and unhook my bra, exposing my breasts for him, and I drop that on top of the blouse. He steps forward then and pushes me back against the door, crushing his lips against mine as his hands palm my breasts.
I moan into his mouth and wrap my arms around him. I had no clue how badly I needed this but it all comes rushing back for me. He kisses me hard, the necklace pinned between us, as his one hand grabs my hair and the other squeezes my ass. He pulls me against his hips and I can feel his cock already hard through his slacks.
He pulls me back away from the door and steers me over to his desk. He clears a spot at the edge for me, knocking some things onto the floor before hopping me up onto the edge. He spreads my legs wide and slowly slides his fingers up my inner thigh as he kisses my neck.
“I’ve been wanting to do this ever since I first saw you,” he whispers.
“I bet you do it all the time.”
He smirks at me. “No,” he says just as his fingers find my soaking pussy, my panties dripping wet and useless. “Never in
my office. Never on my desk.” He deftly slips my panties aside and slides his fingers along my slit, finding my clit, sending waves of pleasure through me.
I gasp as he kisses me again. “I find that hard to believe,” I admit to him.
“I’ve been waiting for you.” He bites my lower lip and pulls my hair. “Waiting for a girl like you.”
“Like what?” I ask him.
“A girl that I can take care of.” He presses two fingers inside of me. “Say it.”
“Yes, Daddy,” I whisper, and he buries his lips against mine.
I know this is the pinnacle of stupid. Doing this in his office is basically the most dangerous thing possible. Anyone could walk in and catch us, and if that happened, we’d be done. It’s not like his door locks, and Minnie isn’t even out there to keep people away. We’re exposed in here, although I don’t feel exposed.
I feel good. He pushes my skirt up over my hips and pulls my panties off. He dives down, spreading my legs wide, and starts to suck and lick my clit, not holding back or being gentle.
He teases me, sucking and teething on my clit before licking me top to bottom, lapping me up. It feels so freaking good, him between my legs, but I love it even more because he seems to love it so much. He groans about my taste, always telling me how good I smell, how badly he wants to lick every single inch of my skin. It drives me wild, how badly he wants me, because I feel the same way about him.
He presses two fingers deep inside of me and nibbles on my clit. I’m totally naked, except for the skirt shoved up over my hips and the necklace dangling down between my breasts. Part of me should be nervous, especially with those big windows all around us. Someone in another building might be able to see… but that only makes me hotter. I love the idea of someone watching Jacob working my body like this.
He pulls back, fingers still buried inside of my pussy, and kisses my lips. I can taste myself on him, which only drives my kiss harder. He pulls back from me, sliding his fingers out, making me gasp.
“I know this is hard for you,” he says, taking his slacks off. “I know you’re trying to be good.”