by B. B. Hamel
“I’ll think about it,” I say quickly, afraid to say more.
“Good.” He leans toward me, taking my hair in his hand and tipping my head back. I gasp softly but don’t move to stop him as desire floods through me. “Think as long as you want.”
He releases me and stands. I stare at him, eyes wide, breath coming in deep and ragged. I’m so excited I can barely sit still. I want more of him, so much more.
“I’ll be in my study. I have some work to do. It’s the first door on the left in the upstairs hallway. Let me know if you need anything.”
I nod, afraid to speak. He gives me a smirk and then leaves the room, glass in hand. My heart is beating hard in my chest and I can barely breathe. I wanted to jump at him so badly, kiss his rough lips, let his hard hands explore my soft body, but I didn’t let myself.
I’m afraid to give in too easily. If he gets bored with me, I don’t know what’ll happen. Maybe that means I’m playing the game, but I’m not sure. All I know is right now, I don’t have any other choices.
And I don’t really want any other ideas. My desire for freedom and my fear of getting tangled up with an older man are both being beaten out by my sheer desire for Carson. Even if he weren’t rich and couldn’t provide for me, I’d still want him, still be attracted to him. The fact that he can be my daddy and take care of me only helps.
I lean back on the couch and stare at the roaring fire, trying to figure out what the hell to do.
7
Carson
As soon as I get up to my office to check in, there are at least ten emails that need an urgent response. I quickly realize that I can’t do all this from home, and a trip into town is going to be necessary again.
I dress in my normal suit, explain to Kylie that the house is hers for a few hours while I go into the office, and then head out. The snow has let up and the roads are mostly clear, so it’s pretty easy going back into town.
I hate to leave Kylie alone after our conversation, but she clearly needs some time to process. She didn’t look disgusted or upset by the offer, but she didn’t immediately accept. I could tell that she was excited, and I bet she wanted me to kiss her in that moment, but I didn’t want to rush things.
I don’t want her to think this is just about sex, because it’s far from that. I feel a strange kinship with her, although she’s much younger than I am. More than that, it excites me to think about taking care of her. I love the idea of spoiling her, giving her everything she could want and more. The idea of having a young, beautiful woman dependent on me for her money, her food, her clothing, her shelter, it drives me wild.
I like the control it suggests. I don’t want her to feel like she’s stuck with me, but I do want to feel like I’m the one who’s protecting and taking care of her. There’s something incredibly sexual about that, although there’s not technically any sex involved.
Though I do want to touch her, and I will. We both know that’s just a matter of time. I won’t rush it, because I know better than to push too hard, but she’s going to come begging for it sooner or later.
I pull into the lot and park in my spot. Our office takes up three floors in the largest building in downtown Juneau. My father actually owns the building, and we could have more space, we simply don’t need it.
I head inside and ride the elevator up. I get off at our uppermost floor and head into my corner office, nodding and saying hello to everyone I come across. I’ve made it a point to know all of my employees, and the people that don’t work directly under me, though there are very few of those. I know that I’m one of the biggest and highest ranking bosses in the company and nobody expects me to know them all by name, but I make it a point to do that anyway.
I don’t want to become like my father and like Elliot. I don’t want to be some out-of-touch rich asshole that cares about nothing but the business. This job is all about people, and people rely on our success.
And I also care about things like the environment. I know oil has a bad reputation, but it doesn’t need to. I want to innovate new, environmentally friendly ways to do business, and move our company into the future. But I’m up against stubborn and backwards thinking men like my brother.
Once I get into my office, I start making calls. A couple of hours pass quickly as I deal with a few issues related to a new well we’re planning on drilling plus a pipeline that’s being constructed through federal lands.
I need to take a break, and so I buzz my secretary and ask her to come into my office. Judy is in her forties, a few years older than me, and she’s been my assistant and secretary for years.
“What’s up, Carson?” she asks, shutting my door behind her.
“I have a task for you,” I say. “Something that has to stay between us.”
She nods, putting away her notebook. “Of course. What can I do?”
“I need you to buy some gifts for me.”
“For who?”
“A young woman.”
A little smile crosses her lips. “A special young woman?”
I nod, keeping my face composed. “Yes, a special young woman.”
“What sort of gifts?”
“Dresses,” I say. “Maybe some jewelry. Something like that.”
She nods, giving me a knowing smile. “Understood. Do you know her size?”
I pause, cocking my head. “She has a body similar to Cindy in accounting. A bit thinner.”
Judy grins. “Good for you.”
“Cut it out.”
She laughs. “When do you need them?”
“Before I leave today. Take the rest of the day for it. And get yourself something nice, too.” I hand her my card.
“I’ll be back soon,” she says, waving as she leaves my office.
I lean back in my chair and sigh. This isn’t the first time that I’ve sent Judy to buy a present for a woman, but this is the first time I’ve actually cared about it. I trust her taste though, and I know she’ll do a good job. I just hope I got my sizing right. I usually have a good eye for that sort of thing, though.
I get back to work for maybe ten minutes before there’s a knock at my office door. I lean back but before I can respond, the door opens and my brother barges in.
Elliot is tall and thin, maybe an inch taller than me, but he never works out so he’s very thin. His suit is pitch black and his hair is slicked back, just like a stereotypical eighties business man. He shuts the door behind him then faces me, a smile on his face. “Carson,” he says.
“To what do I owe this pleasure?”
He sits down in front of my desk, still grinning. “I heard you ran into Declan.”
“Of course you did.”
“Who’s the girl?”
I sigh and shake my head. “Fuck off, Elliot.”
“Oh come on. I just want to make sure you’re not going to do something to embarrass the family.” He leans back in his chair, arms crossed. “How old did you say she was?”
“I didn’t say. But I’m sure Declan guessed.”
“He said twenty by the looks of her.”
I stare at him. “Still none of your business.”
He laughs again, shaking his head. “You’re unbelievable. Seriously, Carson, do you want to hand me the CEO job? Father is going to lose his shit when he finds you with a girl half your age.”
I frown, because I know that’s likely true, but I don’t back down. “What I do at home doesn’t affect the company.”
“Of course it does and you know it. That’s why you were so annoyed to see Declan.”
“I was annoyed that you have your dogs follow me around.”
“Either way, you got caught. Now what?”
“Now you get out and I get back to work.”
“You’re going to destroy yourself,” Elliot says, standing. “And I’m going to love it.”
“Like I said earlier,” I respond, staring at him blankly. “Fuck off.”
He laughs again and leaves my office.
&n
bsp; The rest of the day is spent trying to concentrate on the task ahead. With about an hour left before business closes, I call Judy up and tell her to head back. I know I’m finished for the day, even though I have more work to do. After my brother’s little visit I just can’t really concentrate.
As soon as Judy gets back, I get my card and the bags from her, and then I head back home.
I should be more worried about my brother’s threats. I know he’s right, at least to an extent. I think my father doesn’t care as much about what I do as Elliot seems to think he does, but I could be wrong. Things are volatile right now, and my father isn’t exactly in his normal mindset. He’s dying, and he’s drugged up, and he could do anything at any moment.
I should be playing it safe. But I don’t want to be safe. I want Kylie. And I’m going to have her.
8
Kylie
Once Carson leaves for work, I’m left alone in his house. I look around the place, and for a second it occurs to me that there’s more money in art and other stuff in this place than I’ve seen in my entire life. Leaving me alone here like this is a seriously trusting move on his part.
I want to live up to that trust. And it says a lot about the kind of man he is, and how he feels about me, that he’s leaving me here alone. But I need to explore this house. I’ve been itching to look around, and now’s the time.
I get up and pad softly into the kitchen. I go through the drawers, familiarize myself with the layout, before going back down the hallway. There’s a bathroom, two bedrooms, the bedroom I’m sleeping in, and a master bedroom back there. I pause at his door before slowly pushing it open.
I know this is maybe a little bit of a violation but I can’t help it. I poke my head in and am surprised at how nice it is, although I shouldn’t be. It’s similar to my own room but more modern and surprisingly clean.
I pull back out of his room, not letting myself go all the way in, and head back to the staircase. The stairs are bare wood covered in a clear gloss and they’re a bit cold under my feet as I head upstairs.
On the right is an open loft area with another couch, a cabinet with a record player on top, and an enormous bookshelf covered in records and books. I take a second to look at all of his things before heading back down the hallway. In the back there’s another bedroom, another bathroom, and an exercise room. Finally, I step inside of his office.
It looks about like what you’d expect. A large monitor on a sleek and modern-looking desk. The whole place looks like it was designed by Ikea, except the furniture all looks completely custom. I step into the room and glance at all the books on the bookshelves, more books than I’ve ever seen in a person’s home before.
There are a few pictures on his desk and I can’t help but pick them up and take a look. They’re of his family, or at least I assume they’re his family since everyone looks alike. They’re all old pictures from his childhood, which surprises me. He doesn’t seem to love his family or feel very close to them, and yet here are a bunch of pictures of them in his private study.
That says a lot about him. I think his past is important to him, especially his childhood. Things probably got harder as he got older, since he had to take on more responsibility. Maybe his father was nicer to him back then and he was closer to his brother before they got competitive about the business. His mother looks so young and beautiful, and I’m reminded that he hasn’t said much about her yet, if anything at all.
I put the picture down and head back downstairs. Just as I get to the bottom of the landing, there’s a knock at the front door. I pause, standing there like a scared deer, before creeping up to the door and looking out the peephole.
It’s a delivery man. I open the door.
“How you doing?” he asks.
“Good,” I say.
He hands me a package. It’s not too heavy. “Have a good one,” he says before leaving.
“You too,” I say and look down at the box in my hands.
I’m surprised to see that it has my name on it. I slowly take it inside and shut the door behind me, wondering what the heck this is and how Carson got it up here in this snow. I take it into the living room and open it up, then laugh.
It’s a pair of snow boots. I take them out and sure enough, they fit.
I shake my head, grinning. Carson is an impressive man. I can’t deny that. How he got these boots to me so quickly is a mystery, but I’m guessing it cost him a lot of money.
“Well,” I say out loud to myself, “better put these to good use.” I head into the bedroom, grab my new coat, put on a new pair of gloves, a scarf, and a hat, and finally head outside through the garage.
The land slopes down toward Juneau in front of the house. There’s a driveway that wraps around it and it’s mostly a field for maybe the length of a football field before the forest starts up again. There’s a path that heads into the trees behind the house, and I decide to follow that.
As I walk, I spot a stump with a more beat-up looking axe sticking out of it, which makes me smile. That’s probably where he splits wood, and apparently he has another axe. The forest is so quiet and it’s surprisingly nice. The snow stopped and the wind died down, so it’s comfortable walking around outside.
The path slowly leads uphill away from the house, so I just keep following it. There’s nothing around except trees and more trees. I can hear birds calling, but otherwise, I’m incredibly alone.
I don’t think I’ve ever been this alone before. Even in the city late at night, there’s someone nearby. But out here, I feel like I could scream and nobody would hear me.
It’s absolutely beautiful. I’m struck breathless at the sheer incredibly beauty of what I’m looking at. I’ve never been in a forest like this before, let alone walked around on the paths. And I’m living with the man that owns all of this.
I think I’m starting to get it. I understand why he lives out here secluded like this, away from the city. It’s beautiful, but there’s more to it than that. I feel like I can actually think out here. There’s nothing driving me to do the next thing, to buy some new product, to get on the latest social media site. Out here I can just walk and be alone, and that’s perfectly fine.
I walk for a while. I’m not sure how long. But eventually the path forks right and leads along a little flat area. The mountain continues up, but the path skirts along the flat spot. Through a clearing of trees, I spot a little bench and I walk up to it.
I’m amazed at what I see. The bench is in a small clearing near the edge of a cliff. Down below me, much farther than I would have guessed, I can see Carson’s house. And below that is Juneau, spread out against the water.
I brush off the bench and then sit down, looking out into the distance.
I feel like I’m at the height of something. I don’t mean literally at the top of a mountain, which clearly is what I am, but something else, something more abstract. I ran away from home and nearly died in the freezing cold that night, but now I’m here, warm in my new clothes, looking out over the city I barely know. And it’s all thanks to him. It’s all thanks to Carson.
I sit there for a while, though I’m not sure how long. I’ve probably been outside for a few hours now, and I’m finally starting to get cold, so I start back down the path toward the house.
I feel good. I feel damn good for the first time in a long time. And as I get closer to the house, I hear a car pull up the drive and Carson’s garage door open.
Without thinking, I start running. I run as fast as I can toward the house, wanting to see him as soon as I possibly can. I come around the bend and spot him getting out of his truck.
“Carson!” I call out.
He looks up and smiles. I slow down to a walk as he comes out toward me, a confused grin on his face.
“What are you running from?”
“Nothing,” I say breathless. “I just wanted to catch you before you went in.”
“You got the boots,” he says, looking down.
I nod. “They’re perfect.”
“Good. I’m glad.”
“Carson—“
“Yeah?” He steps toward me, head cocked.
“I’ll do it,” I say. “I mean, I want to do it. I want to stay here. And let you take care of me.”
His grin gets bigger as he gets closer to me. “I want to hear you say the words first.”
“Say what words?” I ask, looking down.
He stops in front of me and tips my chin up, making me look him in the eyes. “Say you want me to be your daddy.”
“I want it,” I whisper.
“Say it,” he commands. Excitement floods through my body.
“I want you to be my daddy.”
“Good girl.”
And then he kisses me. His lips feel perfect against mine, pressed into a soft kiss as his tongue softly slides against mine. I wrap my arms around his neck and press myself closer to him. I feel his hands on my hips as he kisses me, deep and full.
I feel dizzy when we finally break apart. He looks down at me with a big smile on his face.
“Now I have some things for you,” he says.
“More?” I ask, a little breathless still.
“There’s much more.” He turns away and takes my hand. “Come on, let me show you.”
I follow him, heart beating fast, afraid of what’s happening but excited to let it happen.
9
Carson
I can’t believe how excited I feel as I lead Kylie into the living room. I leave her there to go get the bags from the car, and I have to pause a second outside.
I never feel this way about women. I’ve never cared about what they feel before so long as they want me to fuck them. I’ve gone through so many one-night stands in my life that it’s hard to even keep track of them all at this point.
But it’s different with Kylie. Normally all I’d be thinking about is how I’m going to taste that tight little pussy of hers, how I’m going to press her up against the wall and fuck her tight cunt until she screams. But along with all that, I’m thinking about taking care of her, making sure she’s comfortable, and giving her gifts.