by B. B. Hamel
I nod, smiling at her. “It’s a good spot.”
“But my second favorite thing is near here.” She brushes her hands off and stands. “Want to see?”
“Always.” I stand up and grin at her. “Lead the way, park ranger.”
She laughs a little and we head off further down the trail. It skirts along a valley, and it probably gets a lot of water in the rainy season. I can hear running water nearby, probably that stream widening into something a little bit bigger. We’re heading upstream, and the trail veers around a little grouping of bushes and trees.
Ahead, a bunch of enormous rocks and boulders jut out from the earth. Mia grins at me and walks faster. “Come on,” she says.
I keep pace with her. She walks right up to one of the huge rocks and jumps up. I follow her, smiling to myself. I love how confident she is and how free she seems, like it’s no big deal to be crawling around and climbing these enormous boulders.
We get to the top and she points. About ten feet down is the stream, now a bit wider and faster moving. “I love this,” she says.
“It’s pretty great,” I say. I look around and have to admit that the view is fantastic. There are trees all around but I can see how far the trail twists off into them, and the water runs right alongside the valley.
Mia moves slightly but slips. Without thinking, I grab her waist and pull her against me. It probably wasn’t necessary, but it was total instinct.
Our bodies get pressed together and I stumble back, holding onto her, until I run into a tree trunk. I steady the both of us and she looks up at me.
“Saved you again,” I say softly.
“I didn’t need it that time.” She puts her hands on my chest, body pressed against mine, chin tipped up toward me.
“Probably not. But it worked out.”
“Oh yeah?”
I nod once, hands on her hips. “Because now you want me to kiss you.”
She smiles a little bit. “What makes you think that?”
I move one hand slowly up her back and lace my fingers through her hair before pressing my lips against hers. I don’t need to answer her, because she knows as well as I do that she wants this. Our bodies, pressed together, her mouth against mine, it makes my fucking cock hard as hell as excitement and desire roar through my blood.
I love her taste, the softness of her lips, the way she kisses. I didn’t know what to expect, but I didn’t expect this at all. I didn’t think a kiss would drive me this insane, but I tighten my grip on her hair and pull her tighter against me.
We kiss that way, full and deep, for what feels like a long time. It’s maybe a couple minutes at most before she slowly pulls away and I loosen my grip on her hair, but that moment stretched forever in my mind. She looks up at me, chin up, eyes shining and half closed, a big smile on her face.
“That was unexpected,” she says, a little breathless.
“No it wasn’t,” I say. “You knew I was going to kiss you today the second you saw me.”
“Maybe,” she says, shaking her head. “I wasn’t sure.”
I tip her chin toward me again. “Yes, you were. You know that I want you. And I know that right now, you’re dripping wet thinking about what I can do to your body.”
“Lucas . . . “ she says, her eyes going a little wide.
“Let’s not pretend, Mia. You want me to run my hands along your body.” I move my hand down her back again toward her ass. “You want me to taste that wet little pussy of yours.” I stop my hand and cup her ass, pushing her against me.
She lets out a little gasp, almost a moan, and it makes my blood fucking boil with need.
“I saved you twice. And now you want me to fuck you until you scream.”
She stares at me, mouth hanging open, for half a second. And I know I’m right. I can see it written all over her face. She’s not trying to move away. In fact, she’s staring at me with the most obvious “fuck me” eyes I’ve ever seen in my life.
But in an instant, that changes. She looks away and slowly disentangles herself from me. “I have a lot of work to do,” she says.
I laugh softly. “Don’t tell me you’re scared already.”
“Not scared,” she says, but she doesn’t meet my gaze. “Just busy, is all.”
“Sure.” I stand up straight. Before I go though, I take her and kiss her again. She doesn’t resist, in fact, she presses herself hard against me.
I break the kiss off this time. “Pretend all you want. Make all the excuses you can think of. Sooner or later, you’re going to be mine, Mia Hayes.”
She bites her lip again. I give her a look then turn and jump down off the boulder. I walk away, not looking back, my heart hammering in my chest.
I don’t know what her hesitation was back there. It was like she remembered something that totally took her out of the moment and made her rethink everything. It was strange watching her go from clearly wanting it badly to suddenly being too afraid to do anything.
I won’t push her though. She’ll be ready for me sooner or later. I’m a patient man and I get what I want, I just have to be willing to work for it.
And so far, Mia is fucking worth it. God damn that girl tastes good, feels good, and that little moan still lingers in my mind as I clean up our picnic stuff and head back to my truck.
I won’t be able to think about anything but Mia for a while. I can’t deny it. She’s going to be on my mind, and soon I’m going to know every inch of her.
8
Mia
I don’t know why I pulled back from Lucas. I keep thinking about that moment all that day and the next, but I don’t hear from him. I don’t know why I can’t get out my phone and just text him, maybe even explain why I pulled away when I did, but I can’t bring myself to do it.
I’m nervous about my feelings for him. That’s obvious, though I’m not completely sure why. Maybe it has to do with the Carters, but that’s not totally it. I wouldn’t let those assholes dictate what I do with my life no matter what, even if it really is a bad idea.
It’s part that I haven’t been able to feel like this about a person in a long time, if ever. I don’t know if I’m at a point in my life where I can really devote time to a relationship. My father takes up so much of my life, and now I’m worried about the preserve on top of the Carters. Maybe he can help with some of that, but I just don’t know if I can really give him the attention that he deserves.
Not to mention he’s a lot older than me and has a child. That’s a little intimidating. All of that crossed my mind in the moment that I hesitated, but I wish that I didn’t.
Because I know the truth. He’s absolutely right about me. I want to know him, I want to find out what he can give me and how he can make me feel. I pretend that I’m not interested, but I can’t help myself.
I’ve never had a guy treat me like Lucas does. He brought me a lunch out of nowhere, totally surprising me. Maybe with some other guy that would be weird, but with Lucas it was totally natural and incredible. There’s never a dull moment with him and any silence between us is totally comfortable.
It’s almost crazy to imagine how I’m feeling about him, and that’s probably part of what’s holding me back.
I obsess about him all day after he leaves and all the next day. I head home from work, wondering when I’ll hear from him, and take care of my father for the evening. It’s an old routine at this point and I’m used to it, but sometimes I wish I could be a normal person for once. I wish I could just leave the house whenever I want, but I can’t leave my father alone. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night, totally confused and disoriented, and I’m afraid he’d hurt himself if I’m not there to help him.
The nurse service is a big help, and I can’t really complain. He did so much for me already, it’s just obvious that I’d do this for him. That doesn’t make it any easier unfortunately.
I get him to bed around nine, which gives me a few hours to myself every night. Some nights are easier tha
n others in terms of getting him to sleep, but tonight is fortunately pretty easy all things considered. He’s down and I’m on the couch by nine-thirty, flicking through the channels, already thinking about what tomorrow will bring.
My phone suddenly lights up and starts buzzing. I pick it up and look at it, head cocked. I don’t recognize the number, and for whatever reason I decide to pick it up.
“Hello?”
“Mia.”
I recognize the voice immediately.
“Uh, hey Caleb,” I say. “What’s up?”
“I got your number from—hey, stop it” I can suddenly hear some noise in the background. “Yeah, sorry, Dylan is being a total douche. Jordan says hey.” I hear someone yell in the background.
“Are you driving right now?” I ask him.
“Dylan is. We’re going to Chucky’s. You coming?”
“I can’t,” I say, happy for my excuse for once in my life.
“Why not?” he asks. “You too busy?”
In the background, I hear Jordan yell something about my dad and telling him already.
“It’s my dad,” I confirm. “He’s sick. I can’t leave him alone here.”
“Damn. That sucks,” Caleb says and then there’s a pause.
“Uh, hello?” I ask. “Are you there?”
“Hold up,” he says. “What nursing service do you use?”
“Horizon,” I say. “How did you know I used one?”
“Just a hunch. Hold on a second.” The phone clicks and all the sound is gone. I’m still on the line though, so I guess he put me on hold or on mute. I wait a second, wondering what the heck they’re doing.
I want to just hang up the phone. But Jordan is with them, and I do want to get out of the house. I can’t just leave Dad unfortunately, so it doesn’t matter what they say in the end. I’m staying in and that’s just that.
But a minute later, the phone comes back to life. “Okay,” Caleb says. “Taken care of. We’re coming to get you in ten.’
“What?” I ask.
“I called the nursing service. Mary should be over in like five or something.”
I pause for a second. “Are you crazy?” I say. “I can’t afford overtime nurse pay.”
“Don’t worry about that,” he says.
“Caleb, no, no way. I can’t let you do that.”
“Already done, kid. You’re coming out.”
“Come on bitch!” It’s Jordan in the background yelling again.
I bite my lip, looking at the clock. “Is this for real?” I ask.
“If the nurse isn’t there before we arrive, you can stay in.”
I sigh. “Okay,” I say. “I have to get ready.”
“Eight minutes,” he says.
I hang up the phone.
What the hell did I just agree to? I don’t know why I just accepted that. The Carter boys creep me out like crazy, and they definitely hate Lucas. But I want to get out of the house, and Jordan is my closest friend. Maybe they won’t be so bad tonight, and if they are, I’ll just bail.
I jump up and run into my room. I throw on some clothes and do the best I can to my face and hair in my very limited time. About six minutes later, there’s a knock at the door.
Sure enough, it’s a nurse from Horizon. I don’t recognize her, but she’s definitely for real. I thank her for coming and she explains that she’s the on-call nurse and that the Carters use her to take care of their grandmother sometimes. I show her where my father’s sleeping, let her get comfortable, and have about ten seconds to spare before there’s another knock at the door.
I hurry to open it and find Jordan standing there, looking cute as always.
“You ready?” she asks.
“Ready enough,” I say. “He really sent a nurse, you know that, right?”
“I know,” she says, grinning. “He’s kinda great.”
I frown a little bit. “I don’t know if he’s great. He came to my work the other day.”
“He told me you were a total freak about it.” We walk back toward the car where the two guys are waiting for us. It’s a large black truck, very new looking, and probably more expensive than my house.
“He was aggressive and threatening,” I say softly to her. “Really creepy. Seriously.”
She gives me a look that clearly means she doesn’t believe me. “Caleb is a good guy. You just don’t know him yet.”
“Yeah,” I say, backing off. “Maybe.” It’s not worth pushing. I don’t want to piss her off, and besides, I’m going out with them no matter what.
“Let’s fucking go!” Dylan yells. We climb into the car and Caleb grins at me.
“Told you,” he says.
I smile a little. “Yeah, I guess.”
We head out, car driving fast, out to Chucky’s.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I don’t even like Caleb and Dylan. They’re still loud and still obnoxious, although Caleb isn’t as creepy tonight. We park at Chucky’s and head inside, grabbing a corner booth that magically is open and waiting for us. Caleb and Dylan order drinks and immediately Dylan start hitting on some random girl.
But Caleb apparently only has eyes for me. I can tell it bothers Jordan a little bit, and I suddenly realize that she’s into Caleb, which explains a lot. I’m polite and I answer his questions and chat with him, but I’m not really interested, and I hope that’s obvious.
I’m not sure it is, though, based on Caleb’s level of interest and the increasingly sour looks Jordan gives me.
“So, are you impressed?” Caleb asks me after maybe a half hour of listening to him talk about his new audio system.
“With what, your speakers?” I ask.
“No,” he says, grinning that weird smile. “I mean, the nurse.”
“Oh. Yeah, I guess so. Thanks so much for that. I did really need a night out.”
“No problem. I don’t mind at all. Plus, you’re worth it.” He leans toward me a bit and I feel a chill run down my spine.
“Uh, I’ll be back in a second,” I say, standing.
“Where are you going?” he asks.
“Need a drink.” I throw down the one I’m holding then hurry off to the bar.
Jordan instantly swoops in and starts talking to Caleb, but I feel his eyes on me already. I regret coming out with these guys and am not sure why I did it. I guess I didn’t really believe that he’d send a nurse like that, and when he showed up, I felt like I really had to go.
I get to the bar and take a much-needed break. I order a gin and tonic, and while I’m waiting for my drink, I scan the area around me.
As I’m looking at the people, I catch sight of two guys coming in through the side door. I have to do a double take, because it takes me a second to realize that it’s Lucas and his friend.
Shit. I panic and turn away, not sure if he noticed me yet. The last thing I want is for him to see me out with the Carters. I’m such a hypocrite and he’s going to see that. I don’t want him to think less of me. He just doesn’t know how hard it can be sometimes, with my father and everything.
My drink comes and I slam back half of it in one go. I stand there, not sure what the hell to do. I should probably just run the hell away, get out of here completely and hope that Lucas didn’t notice me. As I turn, I bump directly into Caleb.
“Whoa there,” he says. “Where you hurrying to?”
“Uh,” I say. “I don’t know. The table.” I glance around but don’t see Lucas anywhere.
“Who you lookin’ for?” he asks, taking my shoulders.
“Nobody,” I say quickly.
“Come on, come back to the table.”
I follow him reluctantly back, feeling awkward and uncomfortable. I want to run away, but I don’t know what to do. If I leave right now, it’ll look really rude and Jordan will be even more upset with me. She’s like my only friend right now and I really can’t afford to lose her. I don’t care if the Carters think I’m a jerk, but I do care about Jordan.
We get back to the table and sit down. She launches into some conversation about a movie I haven’t seen but that Caleb seems somewhat into. I look around the bar again, nervous and starting to sweat a little bit.
“You okay?” Jordan asks me. “You look weird.”
“Fine,” I say, glancing toward the bar again.
I spot Lucas there, talking with his friend. For a second, I think I’m safe. He hasn’t looked back at me yet.
Until he turns and he looks.
We make eye contact. He looks right at me. He doesn’t look away for a couple seconds before casually turning back to his friend like he didn’t see a thing.
I sit there, devastated. I don’t know why, but I expected something more. I expected anger, or maybe disappointment, or something. Instead, I got absolutely nothing from him, and that hurts way more.
I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t play games like this, it’s just not the kind of person I am. I don’t normally want guys to care and get angry if I’m doing something, I just want everyone to be happy and to get along.
I feel like an idiot. I finish my drink and without another word, I stand up.
“Hey, what’s up?” Caleb asks. “You look weird.”
“I have to go,” I say. “Sorry.”
“What?” Jordan asks. “Caleb got you a nurse. And you’re being so rude.”
“I know. Thank you Caleb,” I say to him. I turn to Jordan. “I’ll make it up to you.”
“You shouldn’t go,” Caleb says, standing.
“Say bye to Dylan for me when he gets back,” I answer, and quickly walk away.
I can’t do this. I can’t let myself become someone I’m not. Lucas totally didn’t care that I was out with the Carters, and that’s okay. He doesn’t have to care. Maybe I misunderstood our relationship and thought there was something stronger between us than there actually is. Maybe I’m naïve and stupid, and I deserve to feel totally embarrassed right now.
Either way, I couldn’t stay there with Caleb and let him keep trying to flirt with me when all I wanted was to get out. Jordan’s going to be pissed, but she’ll get over it soon enough.