by Skye McNeil
“Yes, but you can’t have those yet. Eat dinner first. Asher’s coffee will go perfectly with dessert.”
“What, you don’t like my brew anymore?” He saw a blush creep on her face as he followed her to the table.
“Of course. But maybe it’s so good I don’t want to share,” came her whispery response.
Jared tripped over his own feet and was grateful his food was already safe on the large table. He sat across from her, the last spot left. She hadn’t met his gaze since her statement, and he wondered if it was another phrase she hadn’t meant to say out loud. He loved when she did it. Though, he could see the cons of a lip slip, too.
Stuffed full of delicious food an hour later, Jared watched in amusement as Bobbi, Jessie, Gretta, Erin, and Daisy tried to get their teams to guess what they were acting out. It was the funniest game of charades he’d seen thus far. Each suggestion came from the crowd. All the ideas were mixed up in a furry Santa hat for the teams to choose from.
To him, it was obvious Jessie was the jolly old man himself, but no one could guess the holiday-oriented phrase. One moment, Bobbi pretended to sleep then would walk in front of Jessie who poked out from behind the Christmas tree, hands on her belly. He couldn’t help but laugh at their antics.
“The Night Before Christmas,” he shouted right before the timer went off.
“Jared, you’re on the other team,” Asher reminded, sipping his hard apple cider.
Bobbi took a bow and winked at him. “You’re giving us a head start. Thanks, Ranger.”
Asher jagged an elbow in Jared’s side, but he didn’t care. Bobbi had a way about her. It made him forget all sense of direction. Hell, he’d track down a red-nosed reindeer if her lips requested it.
“Just helping Bobbs out,” he replied with a tilt of his bottle. He’d need a few more beers if he was going to watch her all night and keep his hands to himself. She hit another thing on her list, but she’d made him laugh many times before he knew the damn article existed. He wasn’t sure how he could convince her to wear his clothes, but he was more than willing to try.
»»•««
Putting the last dish in its spot, Bobbi was glad she opted out of the ornament making festivities at her Grandma Jane’s cabin. Art wasn’t a forte of hers, and after baking most the day and cooking the rest, she was ready to relax.
The familiar tones of Gwen Stefani met her ears. “How the hell am I getting a signal?” She wondered, tossing the dish towel aside and running to the bedroom. She caught the last bit of “Rich Girl” before the call went to voicemail. “Hey, Clara, what’s up?”
“Bobbi? I can’t believe I reached you.”
Hearing the upbeat voice of her roommate made Bobbi miss the little apartment in Denver. She was all but playing pretend up in the Rockies with Jared, and she liked it a little too much. “Sorry, I meant to call and see if I missed anything. I guess I got distracted.”
“Ooh, and is a certain handsome Ranger distracting you?”
She grinned like a teenager. “Maybe, but I’ll tell you all about it later. What did I miss?”
“Well, I’m excited to hear all about it, but…” Clara paused. “A hospital in New York City called me since they couldn’t get ahold of you. I guess I’m your emergency contact.”
“Oh.” Sinking into the pillow top, she gulped. “Bad news?”
“For me, yeah, you sly dog. Why didn’t you tell me about the job? They want you, by the way.”
Bobbi tucked her legs crossway under her body. “Sorry, I didn’t think I’d get it, so why worry you when it was a long shot?”
“If they’re tracking me down to get to you, it wasn’t too long of a shot.”
The doorbell rang on the other end. “Your Chinese takeout is early,” she noted.
“Um, it’s not food.” Clara’s voice went up an octave. “It’s a man. A doctor, actually. Damn, he’s not supposed to be here for twenty minutes. He’s always so early.”
Grinning, Bobbi ran a hand through her hair. “Ooh, I see I’m not the only one to keep secrets.”
“Shut it. Mine is sexual and understandable. Yours is a cross-country move,” her friend snapped.
Bobbi heard the three locks unlatch and inaudible whispers, but Clara was back within seconds.
“He’s going to wait because I’m not done talking yet.”
She chuckled. Clara didn’t take shit. It was one of the traits she admired.
“How’s it going with Jared? Be honest. Is he an ass still?”
“As it turns out, no.” She twirled a strand of hair between her fingers. “He’s amazing.”
Clara giggled. “Oh, I know that sound. You’re falling for him again, aren’t you?”
“What? No. That’d be dumb.” She rubbed her lips together. “Okay, maybe a little.”
Instead of chewing her ass, Clara sighed. “But can you see a future with him?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. It’s possible. We haven’t talked about stuff along those lines.”
“Girl, I know you read magazines. Did you skip the part in the article where it tells us to never go back to an ex?”
“We didn’t date.” Bobbi grabbed the magazine, now worn and ripping. “So, as it turns out, I did read it. It doesn’t apply to us.” She smoothed the page. “Oh, and I’m using the tips from the article you teased me about. It’s working too. Jared is paying attention to me and ignoring Erin.”
“Whoa, really?” Clara no doubt had her hand outstretched with enough sass to uproot Texas. “I should try the article.”
“Well, I’ll let you know how it turns out.” She flopped on her stomach and crossed off another item on the list. She’d succeeded in forcing a laugh out of him tonight. Damn charades do it every time.
“Hmm, well, be careful. He’s a smooth talker from what you’ve told me.”
Bobbi stared up at the ceiling. “Yeah, yeah, now who’s your date?”
A static sound scattered across the call. “Oh, no, I’m losing you,” Clara said, manufacturing noises to replicate losing signal.
“Okay, fine, whatever. Don’t tell me. I’ll force it out of you,” she warned, a smile on her lips.
“Right before you leave me forever.”
Rolling to her side, she closed her eyes. “I haven’t decided if I’m taking it yet. I need to call them and discuss options.”
Her friend snorted. “Yeah, right. They’re paying you more, and you get to dive into a new dating pool of wealthy men. As if you’d turn it down.”
“I can’t say for certain yet. My brush with death rattled me.”
“Your what?” Clara shrieked. “I will march through snowdrifts to kick your little ass if you don’t tell me what happened,” the doctor warned.
“I’m fine. Just a snowmobile accident on the lake. Jared saved me.”
Clara groaned. “Oh, geez. He’s a hero too? I should’ve known. But seriously, I got to run before he leaves without me.”
“Be safe and wrap it up!” Bobbi called.
“God, you sound like my mom.”
“Bye!”
Tossing the phone with a blinking low-battery light to the other side of the bed, Bobbi shut her eyes. She hadn’t expected to hear from the hospital until she got back from the holiday trip. In retrospect, she wasn’t sure she wanted it. One thing she was certain of, she needed to find out if Jared was serious about them or just playing out the week with nonstop toying.
“You got the job. Congrats.”
Sitting up too fast, she whipped her head to see Jared standing at the bedroom entrance. Instantly, butterflies filled her gut. “So it seems. I’ll drive into town tomorrow to read my emails and double-check. Clara might have only read a letter from the hospital about the interview. She likes to jump to conclusions.”
He took a step inside, his broad shoulders straight and unyielding. No wonder he made a great soldier. He moved as quietly as an owl mid-flight and could scare without trying. “Will you accept their offer?”
She swung her feet to the edge of the bed and studied him. He looked casual in black jeans and a hooded long-sleeved shirt, but his eyes were guarded, wary even. “No clue. Moving to the East Coast is a huge deal. I’ve never lived anywhere but Colorado.”
Jared leaned against the wall. “Would you want to? Move, I mean. The world’s a big place. Plenty of new sights to explore.”
The way he asked made her believe it wasn’t just about a job opportunity. “I’d think always moving would be lonesome.”
“It is,” he admitted.
“Then, why do it?”
A pained smile crossed his features. The scruffy beard beckoned for her to touch, but he kept his distance. “I’ve never been the white knight. That was Asher’s thing. Always has been.” He took a breath. “I joined the Rangers because I wanted to see the world, kick ass, and play with guns. Being overseas in the middle of it though—” he shook his head. “Bad shit changes you.”
“Jessie told me you’ve seen a lot of death. I’m sorry. No one should have to watch their friends die.” She jerked a thumb toward the other cabin. “Asher told us about what you and he went through. At least one story. I’m sure there are more.”
Jared moved to the end of the bed and traced the quilt’s design. “Yeah, lots. It was rough. All of it. He saved my ass one time, but he’s been out for a while. I don’t plan on leaving quite yet.” He met her gaze. “You should know that. If I happen to leave earlier than planned, I’ll always be part of the military in one way or another. I won’t lie to you.”
His words struck her heart. She’d stupidly hoped for the opposite or even a kinder way to put it. Eyeing the skull tattoo on his forearm, she reminded herself he wasn’t eloquent like his brother. Actions meant more to Jared. “Why do you want to stay in danger?”
“The horrors I’ve seen should never come to America.” He took a breath. “I need to protect as long as I’m able, so no one here sees beheadings and children bombers.”
She remained silent, biting her tongue for asking. Deep down, she wanted to know Jared. Truly know him. Not the surface shit they spoke at Jessie’s wedding, but the hard stuff. “Tell me,” she prodded.
“I’ve done some bad shit in the name of justice.” He scratched his ear. “You don’t want to hear.”
“Yes, I do. I’d tell you if I didn’t.”
He smirked and tilted his head toward her. “Yeah, you would.”
She patted the spot next to her as an invitation. He moved slightly near her, but not as close as she’d prefer.
“Hmm, where to start.” His posture was straight, like every other time she saw him.
“You just tell me whatever you want,” she encouraged. “I’m here for you. Don’t worry. I don’t scare easy.”
Jared smiled and then took a deep breath before he began. “They don’t prepare you for the people you fight. The government trains you to be a machine and sets you loose on the enemy. When I was in Kuwait a few years back, my team was tasked to gather intel on a group of possible terrorist cells. We staked out the camp for two days, just watching their movements.”
Bobbi slid over to him and placed a hand on his thigh. He didn’t notice though. He was far away from the safe cabin in the Rockies.
“Men came and went, but so did women and children. More of those than men. After five days, we figured it out. The men had weapons and the women and kids smuggled them out and dispersed them to their allies.”
Bobbi sensed the story’s direction and squeezed lightly. A part of her didn’t want to hear it all, but her feelings for him wouldn’t allow her to stop him.
“Our orders were to get rid of all of them.” He closed his eyes tight. “And we did. I led my men while two snipers kept our tail. One by one, we clipped the women and kids. A few even shot back. Thankfully, none of my guys were injured, but seeing innocents and killing them…it’s not something I’d wish on anyone.” He shook his head. “I see them at night when I close my eyes. I hear their screams. I can’t stay in one place, or their deaths will never stop haunting me. It’s why I keep moving.”
“I’m so sorry,” she offered after a moment. She wasn’t sure what else to say. They lived in two different worlds. It was never clearer than in those moments.
“Not your fault.”
He moved to get up, but she held her hands on his leg. “No, Jared. It’s not your fault either.” When he didn’t look at her, she moved in front of him and straddled his lap. Forcing his chin to meet her gaze, she held in a sob at the tears glistening in his pale depths. He truly wasn’t like most men. He’d literally relived his nightmare, all because she’d asked. What kind of man does that? The best kind.
“I’m sorry you went through hell while you’ve been deployed. You shouldn’t let it keep you from being happy.” She brushed his short hair. “You did your job well, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. No reason to run.”
He nodded, but the look in his eyes told her he wasn’t convinced.
“Jessie mentioned you had a girlfriend a while back. What happened?” The air in Jared’s lungs seemed to deflate at her quiet question. “If you can’t talk about it, I understand,” she added when he stayed mute.
“No, it’s fine. I don’t talk about Aubrey much.” He cracked his neck to the side.
“We met at a training course in Iraq a few years ago.” Jared closed his eyes. “We didn’t see each other much since she bounced around a lot with the Black Hawk choppers. She repaired helicopters.”
“Oh, sure.”
He kept going when she nodded in encouragement. “It was hot and heavy for about six months before we broke up.” He smirked. “We did it a lot. Breakup then get back together, I mean. She was as much of a nomad as me, so it kind of made sense.”
“The last time we called it quits, I was moved to Kuwait, and she stayed in Iraq. I found out three months later her Humvee was hit with an RPG. No one made it.”
“Oh, Jared,” Bobbi gasped. Agony filled her gut at his admission.
“Yeah, so the whole relationship thing has been avoided since then.” He attempted a smile, but it mangled on its way to his face. “I couldn’t protect her, and I’m afraid the same will happen to anyone else I dare to love.”
The severity of his statement chilled her. He deserved much better than a future, thanks to a handful of horrible experiences. The truth was obvious in his eyes. When he loved, it was long and meaningful. She couldn’t imagine losing someone in such a tragic way. Pressing a light kiss to his forehead, she stayed there a moment longer. He might not need her touch, but she sure as hell needed it. His shaky sigh made her heartbeat quicken.
Hopping off him after kissing his cheek, Bobbi shut off the light and closed the door. He needed her more than he’d admit. If the most she could do was comfort him, she’d do it. He saved her life. She owed him much more than her pity.
“What’re you doing?” he asked, his voice shaky.
She returned to the bed and grabbed his hand. “Come on. You’re getting a good night’s rest.”
“Bobbi—”
Bobbi squeezed his hand. “And I’ll be here to shoo the nightmares away.”
“I’m a grown man. I don’t need a dream watcher,” he protested but followed her nonetheless.
She slid under the covers and pulled back the other side. “I sure hope not, but even grown men need someone to look out for them.”
Jared stood by the bed as if calculating his options. One second he looked eager to be with her, and the next unease covered his face.
“And don’t you dare wear jeans to bed,” she warned before he could protest further. “Those damn things will scratch up my silky legs.”
He cracked a smile. “Well, we wouldn’t want that to happen. I’m quite fond of your long legs.”
Her heart pounded at the sound of him losing all but his boxers. Camouflage, if she had to guess. Slowly, he eased under the comforter, but his body remained rigid.
“For the love
of God, I won’t bite,” she mumbled, snuggling next to him. His body heat enveloped her like a giant hug, and he hadn’t touched her. Yet. One arm drew her in, and she couldn’t refuse him. She didn’t want to.
Resting her chin on his chest, she pressed a quick kiss to the Ranger tattoo perfectly matching his brother’s. His heartbeat thrummed in her ears. The sensation shot warmth down to her toes. She traced the tattoos on his smooth chest as they begged for more of her touch. Not tonight, she told herself. He needed to feel safe and wanted. It was all she wanted too.
Skootching up, she cuddled her head under his chin. “Sleep now, Ranger. I’ll fight off the demons.”
Jared’s rough hand circled circular patterns on her back until they both succumbed to slumber.
Chapter Nine
Waking up never seemed so wrong. Soft curls tickled Jared’s nose until he batted at them. It was then he remembered where he was and with whom. Cracking one eye open, he held in a content sigh. Bobbi lay curled in the crook of his arm, her body perfectly aligned next to his. The blanket hid her curves, but he felt her heat exude from every long inch of her. This wasn’t the norm for him. Bobbi was much taller than the select few he actually woke up beside. Most times, he snuck out after the woman fell asleep. Her left hand settled on his chest as if they’d slept together hundreds of times before last night. He didn’t want to slink out this morning or any other morning. He wanted to relish each moment he lay wrapped with Bobbi in his arms.
The clock above the door said eight in the morning, and he was shocked no one else was up yet. Maybe they slept in the other cabin. He hadn’t heard a vehicle or Bobbi’s loud cousins tromp in at any time after all.
Looking down at her unruly auburn hair and smudged makeup, Jared swore he’d never forget the moment Bobbi reeled him in for good. His heart was utterly lost to her. The tender way she’d compelled him to not only spill his sad tales but also let her hold him tight until he fell asleep marveled him even then. Opening up didn’t come easy, but he’d needed to tell Bobbi in hopes of scaring her away, so he could return to a nomad. Life played a naughty trick on him when his plan went wayward. She hadn’t pitied him or seen him as a brute; she’d accepted him. Flaws and all. Jared didn’t regret telling her about his ex, but he hoped he hadn’t scared her off. It was funny how what he thought he wanted wasn’t the same. Not any longer. Not when his heart felt at home with her.