Looks like he’s right again.
I know I won’t tell him this, though, as he already thinks he’s right way too often. Last thing I need is his head getting bigger than it already is. I’ll have to consider alternatives to this once I feel better. For now, though, he can be as right as he wants. I’m just too tired to put up a fight about it.
***
When I wake from a restless sleep in the morning, I find Devin by my side, and I feel better than I have in years.
If only every day could be just like today, I think, things just couldn’t get any better.
By the time we reach the bakery, I’m almost too tired to enjoy my bagel.
Devin watches me like a hawk, and Jason walks just behind us, with two more security professionals following on the other side of the street.
“Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”
“What? You wanna go?”
Concerned that he’s pushing me too far, too fast, too soon after the attack, Devin hurries to gather our things together.
“No, Dev, we don’t have to leave. I’m just saying, we have all these people with us. Maybe we should have taken all our things to go.”
“Clar, we need to get back to our normal routine as soon as possible. It’s important for us not to negate our normal regime.”
“You mean so we can get back to our lives? Or something else?”
Avoiding eye contact, he just takes a sip of his coffee.
“What are we doing, Devin?”
“I don’t know what you mean, honey.”
“Don’t you?”
“Let’s just get our things together, and we’ll go.”
“Devin?”
“Yes, honey?”
Pissed doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel at this moment.
“You son of a bitch!”
Storming away from him as fast as I can, I begin making my way to my condo.
“Where are you going?!”
“Home!”
“Good. We need to go home right away.”
“No, I’m going home. You’re going somewhere else.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you need to stay away from me.”
“Clar baby, what are you talking about?”
“You’re just like my friends were. Except this time, you’re trying to get his attention.”
“Who?”
“The attacker. You want him to find us. You want us to follow the normal routine so he will follow us. Find me.”
“Baby, wait.”
“Wait, my ass. I thought you loved me so much you wanted to take such good care of me?”
“Baby, I do.”
“No, you want to try and get me killed by having him follow me again.”
“No, baby. Let me explain.”
“Fuck you.”
“Clar baby, please.”
“No! I’m going home. To think.” Storming away as fast as I can, I know he’ll be right there behind me. “So stay away from me!”
“Clara, no!”
“Yes! Stay the hell away from me.”
At this point, Devin knows he’s screwed. I’m not going to listen to anything he has to say, let alone give him a chance. We end up arguing all the way to the condo, and by the time we reach the door, I instruct Frank to not let Devin in.
“Don’t do this! Please, Clara. Please”
“You just broke my heart, Devin. How dare you? You knew how this would affect me, especially after knowing about what my friends did.”
“I know, and I’m sorry!”
“Whatever, Devin. I don’t want to talk with you right now. Just go.”
“Please, Clara.”
Trying and failing to push his way past Frank, who was like a cement wall, Devin resigns himself to the fact that he is stuck on the sidewalk. Watching her walk away toward the elevators, he orders Jason to take over.
Jason then asks Frank if he can go up.
“She didn’t say anything about you, so I’m thinking you’re all good.”
“Thanks.”
***
Crying into my pillow, I can’t believe Devin would betray me like this.
How could he do this to me? Especially after what happened with my friends! How?
The light knocks on the door don’t register in my head until they grow louder. Normally, at this time, my cats will have nudged me, but dang it, I remember I’ve left them at Devin’s place. I haven’t been thinking past getting away from him.
“Clara?”
Jason? Crap, I forgot he was with us.
“Come on, Clara. I know you’re in there.”
His voice is so calm I want to just crawl into his soothing presence.
Shuffling my way to the door, I sniffle all the while, uncertain what I’ll say to him. Once I open the door slightly to see his face, I realize he is seriously not going anywhere anytime soon.
“What?”
“Can I come in?”
“Not now. I’m kinda tired.”
“Clara, come on.”
He seems determined to remain by my side no matter what.
“What?”
“Seriously, what? That’s all you got for me?”
“Fine! Come in, then leave once you’ve done your security thingy.”
Pushing past me, he sweeps the condo to make sure it’s safe before he comes back into the living room. I’ve been sitting on the couch the entire time, clutching the pillow I use for comfort. When he comes in and sits next to me on the couch, I’m startled momentarily, until he takes the pillow away from me.
“Hey!”
“You done yet?”
“Give me that back! You finished your security thingy, now go.”
“No. We need to talk.”
“I don’t want to talk. I just want you to go. Now.”
“Normally, I would do as you’re asking, but not today.”
“What? Why not? Just go!”
“No. Are you done feeling sorry for yourself yet?”
“I’m not feeling sorry for myself!”
“Under different conditions, I would agree with you, but today, after what I witnessed, I’m beginning to think otherwise.”
“What did you just say to me?”
“You heard me.”
“I’m not a coward!”
“No one said you were. What I’m saying is that you’re feeling sorry for yourself.”
“I am not!”
“Whatever. I’m not your boyfriend. I don’t care either way, except that my brother is now torn apart that you’re up here upset, while he’s on his way back to the house, worried sick about you.”
“I don’t care. He shouldn’t have done that to me, put me out there like bait to the man who attacked me.”
“Oh, come on. You don’t know if that guy is still around, let alone going to attack you again so soon.”
Okay, he has a point. Damn him.
“Besides, you don’t fool me. It’s the same thing that you wanted to do.”
I’m dumbfounded at his remarks, and a bit taken back by his tone toward me. I thought he liked me. I wasn’t expecting this level of hostility. Unsure how to proceed, I just watch him in silence, willing to see where he is going with this.
“You don’t need coddling. You’ve been coddled enough, Clara. It’s time to get your act together now, and take a stand. You’re brave, much braver than this, so stop acting like this and get out of here. Go back to the man who loves you. Stop being so annoying.”
“Annoying?! Are you freaking kidding me? What the hell is your problem, anyway?”
“Where to start? First, I’m here, and not protecting my brother from his own psychopath loser. Second, you’re feeling sorry for yourself and blaming him for something that was my idea. Third…”
“Your idea?”
“Let me finish, interruptoritice.”
“Interruptoritice? What the heck is that?”
“You. Now stop interrupting
. Third, in case you didn’t know this—which I’m sure you didn’t—there was a security detail on both of you, so this time nothing would have happened to either of you.”
“What, the three of you? Against God knows who my attacker is, or even who Devin’s stalker may be?”
“No, smartass. You only saw three people, but there was actually a lot more than the three of us around.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. Now get it together and take a breath. Come downstairs when you are ready, and by the way, I am not waiting around all day for you, so don’t make me come back up here to get you.”
“You son of a bitch! How dare you talk to me like this? I have the right to be angry!”
“Good. So be angry, then get over it, and get your ass back to my brother.”
“Damn you, get out of my house!”
“No problem, princess. Just get your ass downstairs when you come to your senses.”
Pushing him through the door, I slam it for good measure as I turn and yell in frustration. Anger spreads like warmth across my body in waves of heat. It’s almost unbearable in the way it extends throughout me.
How dare he? What’s his problem, anyway? He’s Devin’s brother, and Devin would never purposely put me in danger. But he did put me in danger by making me bait to my attacker. Seriously, Jason just said it was his idea. Can I blame Devin for what Jason does? Yes! He went along with it, and dang it, I’ve been used before, and I won’t let it happen again!
He’s not those people, and you know it. He loves you. He wants to keep you safe. He’s done everything to make you feel safe, and everything to physically make you safe. You trust him, and he’d never betray you.
I listen to the two voices at war in my head and I know there isn’t even a question as to whether Devin would betray me. I know for a fact he wouldn’t. But I also know that I have every right to be upset that he didn’t talk with me about all this.
What was he thinking?
To know the answer to that question, I’ll have to ask him—in person.
Crap.
The decisions we make today determine our future, and what happens to us and those we love. It’s one thing to step away from Devin altogether, but I know that I feel complete when I am with him, and that will never come from anyone else. That alone gives me pause to consider: Is the alternative even acceptable?
I know for a fact that this man has become such a part of me that without him, even now, I feel like I’m missing a limb. The love I feel for him won’t go away with stupid actions or misguided intentions. Our love is ours, and ours alone, and it’s not for others to manipulate for their own gain—which I’m wondering if Jason is doing now. Using our connection to configure a reckless course of action that could draw out the attacker.
And then there’s the other question: Who is Devin’s stalker?
My attacker has come for me, but his stalker is still out there, and we have no idea who he is. That fact chills me to the bone, and suddenly I know what I have to do.
When the elevator doors open, I step into the lobby of the condo complex.
“Okay, I’m ready to go home.”
“About time,” he says, before turning toward the doors.
Chapter Twelve
Jason’s smug demeanor can grate on your nerves if you don’t realize he’s just being him. He’s a complete professional when he’s in protective mode. I learned that weeks ago—the many facets of Jason Robinson, the brother with the concentration that won’t be hindered.
Determination has nothing on Devin’s brother when he puts his mind to a task. His whole personality is void of everything else. It can be maddening at times, but when you’re in trouble, it’s the kind of devotion you look for in someone willing to help you.
I’m so nervous as we get closer to the house that my leg won’t stop bouncing. Jason’s driving the Quattro through the iron gates that once enamored me so much. Now they impose a threat to my well-being. Pulling into the circular drive to the front door, I’m reluctant to vacate the vehicle, wondering if this is such a good idea.
You can’t force yourself to forgive betrayals. You can live with them, though, and right now I’m not certain I can do either. Once more, the mere thought of Jason teaching me anything is irreprehensible to me as I watch him come around to my door.
Not ready, I lock it as he pulls the handle.
Jason regards the dark tinted glass as though he can see me, and squints his eyes in disgusted annoyance.
“Enough of this shit, Clara.”
Menacing as he seems, I just flip him off from the other side of the glass.
Huffing like a charged bull, his hot breath steams the outside of the window as he begins to try and intimidate me out of the car.
“That’s enough, Jason.”
Taking hold of his arm and pulling him away from the vehicle, Devin reaches for the door to find it locked, then looks to the window without seeing me inside at first. Then he implores me with his eyes.
“Take your time, honey. If you would rather I took you back to the condo, then that’s no problem, we can try this again some other time.”
“We don’t have time for this shit!” Jason bitterly barks back to Devin as he tries to reach for the car.
“Jason, enough! I’ve had it with your demands on us. We did it your way, and look where that got us. Clara must think the worst of me right now as it is, so cut the crap and go away! This will take us however long it takes us. Us! Not you! Not bugger off, asshole!”
Devin has clearly had enough of his brother’s inference, and from what I can make out of the situation, he’s clearly not enthusiastic about going it alone with the plan from earlier, either. Sincerity is etched across his face as he once again looks into the dark glass.
“Clar baby, I’ll take you back to the condo. Jason will stay away for as long as we decide. Okay?”
Jason heads off in a mad dash to get to his safety zone, the security building located on the other side of the property, far away from the main house.
Hopefully this will be far enough away to fix the damage his stupid plan has caused.
Taking the keys as he walks around to the driver’s side, Devin doesn’t say a word as he starts the car and begins to pull out to leave.
“Stop the car,” I say suddenly, barely above a mumble.
“What?”
Devin slightly turns his head, but keeps his eyes on the road, so I say it again, only louder this time.
“Stop the car. Please, Devin.”
We come to a stop along the street, only a few blocks away from his house. It could have been next to the condo for all I care. I’m not going anywhere. I love him, and it’s time I showed him.
“I love you,” I say, without looking at him.
“I love you too, baby,” he says as he leans in to kiss my cheek.
“This wasn’t your idea.”
I know it wasn’t now. I got the gist of the conversation before Devin got into the car.
“No, baby, it wasn’t.”
He never would betray me, and Jason was just trying to do his job.
“You’re not my past, and it’s about time I stopped defining you by other people’s actions.” Not sure that’s come out right, I try again. “I mean…”
But Devin gets it. He gets me.
“I would never ever do that to you, baby. You know that.”
Raking his fingers through his hair, he pulls me out of my seat and onto his lap—which is a tight fit with the steering wheel, but somehow he manage it.
“I don’t want to lose you over something stupid like this. Hell, I don’t want to ever lose you.”
Feeling the same way as he does, I kiss his lips, putting all the love I can into showing him and forgiving him at the same time.
“Let’s go home, baby.”
Placing me back into the passenger seat, he turns the vehicle around to go back to the house.
Groggy from the medication meant t
o ward off the infection after the attack, and now tired from all the drama the day has brought, I can barely keep my eyes open. The sweet lull of the vehicle places me into a restful sleep as Devin drives us toward the house.
Then his arms carry me out of the car and through the garage to the house. He wakes me enough that I nuzzle into his hold. Shifting slightly to unlock the door, he nestles his face into my hair, breathing in the scent of sweet nectar shampoo I use.
“I’m sorry,” he says, barely a whisper, but I remain half-asleep as he continues holding me close as we make our way up to our bedroom.
“Shhh. Sleep, baby. I’ve got you.”
My eyes drift back to sleep as he places me on the bed, pulling the blanket that lay at the foot of the bed over me to keep me warm.
“I love you so much, and I’m so worried that all this drama is too taxing on your system. Rest, baby. I’ll watch over you.”
Crossing over to the other side of the bed, Devin gets close enough just enough to pull me into his arms.
Drifting further into the void, I take a steady deep breath and fall asleep for what seems like a lifetime.
***
“Lexie, I don’t know what to do. She’s not waking up!”
“I know, I know. I never should have listened to Jason. It was a stupid idea…”
“What do you mean?”
“I have to check on something, look at some pictures. Just give me a minute, and I’ll call you back.”
“Pictures of what? The wound?”
“Okay, okay. Just hold on.”
Devin lightly grazes my stomach with his fingers, a cool touch against my skin.
“Lexie, she’s twitching. I think she feels me. What do I do?”
I hear rather than feel the bandages being removed. Then I gasp as I hear several clicks from what I assume are photos that are being taken. Then there’s loud shouting, as if through a tunnel. I assume it’s Lexie, screaming down the phone.
“What do I do?” Devin sounds so upset the words are almost unrecognizable. “Okay, I’ll grab the medicine from the pharmacy, and the supplies. Okay, I won’t do that again. Okay, I said. Will you let Jason know, too?”
Heart's Desire (Game of Hearts Series Book 2) Page 15