by Claire Angel
I realized she was right – it wasn’t appropriate for me to buy her a drink. “I’m sure we’re allowed to just chat after work, about work, weather, and some bits of our personal lives.”
She nodded and accepted the offer to chat casually. We started talking about her previous jobs, how she had walked out on her last employer without giving proper notice, and how Tabitha had told her about my situation. Then we started talking about my practice. Sara was impressed that I was a doctor. She told me about her dream to become a nurse and that she was saving up for her school tuition. A loan was out of the question – her granny wouldn’t want her to pay interest on something that she could have saved for over time.
Once she finished her drink, I went to get us both new drinks. She joined me at the bar, and we sat there and started talking a bit more. She asked me if I’d ever tried crowd-watching. As I didn’t know what she was talking about, I asked her to explain. She said it is when you look for interesting characters in the crowd and then think of their life story, make up a fantasy, maybe even hook them up with someone else in the group.
We spotted a group of girls, and Sara started, “They are groupies hunting for their prey. They need one another for moral support, but as soon as the groupies spot a man meeting their requirements, they pounce on him. Usually, the poor guy is intimidated and flees the scene.”
As if Sara’s words placed them under a spell, they spotted a potential victim, and they approached him as a group. We could see he was uncomfortable, bringing his drink close to his chest and stepping one step back to create a bit of space between them. After laughing nervously at something the ring leader had said, he pointed to someone on the other side of the room, and he ducked.
We burst out laughing as the groupies looked rejected. They soon recovered and regrouped, ready to scout for their next prey. I was having a good time, and her laughter made me feel warm and relaxed.
She told me it was my turn to pick someone, so I scanned the crowds and found an older man, looking at his table, hypnotized by his drink, but now and then he would sneak a peek in the direction of the waitress doing her rounds.
She had legs up to her arms and was dressed in a very short skirt that every time she bent over, her skirt would reveal more than the older man’s heart could handle. I pointed out the situation to her, and she giggled. Sara told me that guy was a regular, he always sat there, and the waitress kept his glass full. He was never inappropriate, but Tabitha and her had wondered about him as well. Maybe he was an undercover partner, making sure his assets were still high in demand, fresh, and attractive.
“What if he was a pervert when he was younger, and now he has retired, and his taste has matured to an older generation?”
Sara pulled a sour face, and said, “No, yuck, that would just be too gross and freaky. Let’s stick with the undercover partner for now.” Sara gave a quick shiver of her body like she was trying to shake the feeling off her.
“Okay, I’m sorry, maybe I’m not so good with creating stories for characters.”
Sara just shook her head as she took a sip from her drink. “No problem, Tabitha has a crazy and wild imagination. Sometimes her stories are much more disturbing. I think you did well for a first try. Maybe you can try one more.”
But before I could scout the room, Tabitha came over to the bar and asked if she could steal her friend away as her favorite song was playing. Sara just smiled at me, slid off her chair, and said, “Duty calls, friends before employers.”
I loved her sense of humor, the playful tease in her eyes. As I watched her step onto the dance floor, the rest of the crowd disappeared. I only saw her curvy body, moving and flowing with the rhythm of the song.
Chapter 6
Sara
I could’ve kissed Tabitha for getting me out of that awkward situation. I knew myself better than that — those jokes I was making weren’t just innocent jokes. Unfortunately, I knew how my subconscious instincts were hard-wired. If my heart wanted a man, my mind would become dysfunctional, and I’d make the silliest jokes, teasing the poor soul to his knees and then leaving him high and dry, till he’d beg me for more. I couldn’t play that game with my employer. That would be too dangerous, and put too much at stake.
I had to get a grip on myself. Tabitha had excellent moves on the dance floor, and I met her every beat, as we had been dancing together since we were sixteen. We appeared to be synchronized, but to Dryden, there was only one. I could feel his eyes caressing my body, and I loved the feeling. It spurred me on to go the extra mile. Tabitha felt the urgency and let me take the lead. She whispered in my ear, “You go, girl. Reel him in and take him down.”
She threw her head back and was laughing out loud, and I couldn’t help but blush a bit and laugh with her. I leaned in towards Tabitha, and said, “I’m not sure this is a good idea.”
Tabitha just shook her head, and pulled a sad face. “Oh no, little Sara is afraid of the big, rich wolf.”
I bumped her with my hip and stuck my tongue out at her. “You know what I mean.”
As she regained her balance, she moved closer to me, and said, “Whatever you mean, you better make up your mind, because the wolf is onto your scent.”
While I was looking at her with a frown on my face, she stepped back a few steps, and I felt two hands on my hips. I took in Dryden’s scent, and that spicy cologne transported me deeper into his arms. I could feel his hands following every movement my hips made, and as I turned around, his hands stayed in the same place. His touch was creating two warm lines where his hands were tracing over my bottom and my front. Fuck, he makes me so horny. Once I was fully turned around and facing him, the one that lingered in front joined his other hand that was holding my ass. He pulled me in, and I could feel that his crotch was stiff.
The world started to turn slowly. The people and music seemed to fade into the background. My hands began to trace over his arms. My eyes were following the movement of my hands. I could feel his strong arms underneath the silk shirt that he had on. As my hands glided over his broad shoulders, I brought them back around his neck. My eyes were still following every muscle that my fingers traced. My hands were tracing down the front of his shirt—he worked out—as his chest was rock hard and well formed. My hands came to rest on his chest, and I could feel the drumming of his heart. The rhythm hypnotized me, and my hands started to slide down over his stomach, every little bump as I counted, going down. My hands touched his belt, and my fingers, without any control, hooked into his belt.
All the while my hands and eyes were exploring his body, his hands remained on my butt, but then he leaned in and breathed heavily on my neck. He kissed my neck while I was still looking down, his hands were gliding up my back, and I could feel his arms encircling me. I felt safe, and I wanted to stay in that embrace for the rest of my life. His hands reached my neck, and gently, he cupped my jaw and pulled my face up towards his. We kissed, a deep and passionate kiss. I felt like the world had melted around me, and we were floating somewhere in the night.
With a sudden jolt back to reality, my hands were on his chest again, but this time, I pushed him away from me. “I’m so sorry. I got caught up in the moment.” Panic took hold of me, and I started to realize how weird things could be the next day. “I didn’t mean for this to happen. Please, I need this job.”
He looked at me with his eyes full of mixed emotions. He almost looked angry, but then hurt. He tried to step backwards, but he bumped into another dancer, so he lost his balance and fell forward, barely gaining his balance as he was leaning on me as I tried to catch him.
“I’m sorry, this was a mistake. You are right, we should never have done this. I don’t know what to say. I’m ashamed of myself. We can talk tomorrow.” He looked confused as if he were scolding himself. He turned around and walked away without saying another word.
I stayed on the dance floor transfixed by what had just happened. Tabitha was there beside me. “Okay, my girl, take a deep breath. Le
t’s get you on a chair,” she said, and guided me off the dance floor.
I followed my best friend’s advice and sat on the chair while she went to get some drinks. My mind was racing, but my thoughts were foggy – nothing made any sense. I felt like I was running up a mountain, but it was never going to end. I could feel my heart beating in the veins in my neck, and I realized I had to calm down. Otherwise, I was going to have a panic attack.
Tabitha returned with the drinks, and I downed my drink in three large gulps. The whiskey shocked my taste buds and burned my throat slightly as I swallowed, the pain distracting my thoughts for a moment, and I looked at Tabitha.
“What just happened?”
Tabitha looked at me with a very concerned look. “What? You mean you weren’t there when your rich, fucking hot boss kissed you? Damn, what a time to have an out of body experience, not the best timing, my friend.”
“That’s not what I mean. What I mean is what did I just do?”
Tabitha gave me a doubtful look. “You teased your boss, then you turned him on, and then you kissed him. Are you sure you are okay?”
“Stop giving me sarcastic answers. I’m serious. I just placed my job, my income, my studies in jeopardy, because he made me hot and lightheaded. I messed up, big time.” I placed my elbows on the table and rested my head in my hands. A throbbing headache started to form – someone had given my brain a hammer as a form of self-torture. I looked up at Tabitha. “I’m sorry to cut our night short, but I have to go. I have to think about what just happened, and I have to think of a way to fix it.”
Tabitha took hold of my one hand. “Do you want me to come with you? I will. Except if you want to be alone–”
“No, I’m going to be fine. I think I want to be alone for a bit, and then I have to go home. Don’t worry about me, I will be fine. Will send you a text when I get home, okay? You enjoy the rest of the night. Anyway, a man is ogling at you on the dance floor.”
I pointed towards James, standing on the edge of the dance floor. When he saw Tabitha look in his direction, he beckoned her to join him, and then placed his hands together, begging her to go with him.
Tabitha looked at me, smiled, and kissed my cheek, and she was off to a good night. I just sat there for a moment, not sure my legs would carry me to the door, never mind to my car. I took a few deep breaths, gathered my strength and the last bit of courage that I had left, and walked to the door in a straight line.
*
Outside, the cold fresh air was freezing my lungs for a split second and then the fresh air reached my brain, and with a newfound vigor, the little hammer came pounding down on my skull with a constant rhythm.
When I reached my car, I unlocked the door and fell into the driver’s seat. I wasn’t drunk. I was just in complete shock, slightly panicky. Okay, maybe I was very close to a full-on panic attack. I had to think about this. Only one remedy could help me get my sanity back intact. I needed a decaf cappuccino with foam. My mind pictured the cup of coffee and I somehow relaxed a bit. The tension in my shoulders released as I knew which coffee shop would still be open and ready to serve the late-night owls.
Two blocks away, I had to stop at a red light. At the opposite corner, a police car was parked. My panicky mind went into a downward spiral, as I thought about ending up in jail, having to call Mr. Bossman to come and bail me out – the humiliation. I would never be able to get a job in this town ever again.
The light turned green, and I drove off in my best behavior. The policeman didn’t even look up from his cup of coffee in his one hand and the newspaper in his other hand. I felt like an utter idiot, freaking out about nothing. Get to the coffee shop, sit down, have a cup, and then go home.
I arrived at the coffee shop, and I felt like I was on the edge of a sharp blade. How could Dryden be so hot one moment and then the very next moment, he didn’t even want to look at me? He kissed me. He pulled my face towards him. So why did I apologize so profusely? Why did Dryden apologize? Wasn’t it the most significant kiss he had ever experienced? It was my best kiss.
Sure, I worked for him, I was his daughter’s nanny, but surely, he could make up his mind about how he felt about me. Either he liked me, or he didn’t. Perhaps he was afraid that I didn’t share his feelings, but I had just proved it to him.
Again with my head in my hands, and my elbows on the table, the waiter placed my cup of coffee in front of me. The pleasant aroma of coffee brought me back to reality, and I promised myself I would focus only on this cup, enjoy it, and face my problems the next day. At least he said we could talk tomorrow – that had to be a good sign.
True to my promise to myself, I drank my cappuccino without another thought about you know who, and afterwards, I felt relaxed, ready for bed. As I drove home, through the quiet lower-class streets, with only a few lights on in some of the houses, others wholly locked in darkness, I realized we were from different worlds. Maybe it was better if we didn’t talk about it tomorrow and rather forgot it had ever happened.
That night, I closed my eyes, promising myself I would keep my distance, as a girl like me was not in the same class as a man like him. I needed the money, and that was my main goal and my only reason for going back tomorrow.
Chapter 7
Dryden
Once again, as my watch showed 7:00 am, the doorbell rang. I didn’t have to go downstairs to know who had just arrived. Her punctuality was impressive. Maybe she had arrived five minutes early and sat outside till the time was right and then walked over to the door and timed it exactly when to ring the doorbell. Thinking like that made me wonder if maybe I wasn’t onto something.
I had told her we should talk today, but I wasn’t sure what to say to her. Well, there were only two options – either she stayed on as the nanny, and we didn’t pursue this silly infatuation, or she had to leave. I genuinely hoped that we could agree on the former option, as I didn’t know where I would find another nanny.
As I came down the stairs, Sara was placing her bag on the dresser cabinet. She had to have heard me come down the stairs, as the tapping of my shoes echoed through the house, but she didn’t look at me or even greet me.
Piper came running down the stairs behind me and then Sara looked up. She looked right through me at Piper. I might just as well had been invisible for the amount of notice she gave me.
Piper came running past me, straight into Sara’s arms and hugged her. What had just happened? My sweet darling daughter didn’t even come to greet me, but Sara had already received her morning hug.
After Piper greeted Sara, Piper turned around and came towards me to hug me as well. “Hello, Daddy.”
“Hi, my sweetheart. I was almost worried that I wasn’t going to get a hug, and that Sara was going to use up all of your hugs for the morning.”
Piper giggled at how silly I was. “Hugs cannot be used up, Daddy. I will always have the biggest hug especially for you.”
I went down on my one knee as Piper placed her little arms around my neck. After the sweetest hug, I kissed Piper’s forehead, and told her, “Quickly, go to the kitchen, and get your breakfast.”
Bu the time I stood up again, Sara had already turned around and followed Piper into the kitchen without a word, not even a greeting. I stood there for a while, alone in the foyer, wondering what the right course of action would be. Should I call her back, greet her, and then send her back to the kitchen? No, that would look childish and ridiculous. I’m going to let this slip once, but if she keeps up this front, I will have to speak to her about it. This is still my house, and I deserve respect.
I almost laughed at myself – respect from the girl I had rubbed against last night and kissed? As I thought again about last night, I could feel I was getting stiff. Her body, her scent, her taste, it all just turned me on. I had to get out of here before they returned and found me standing with my pants revealing all. I was an absolute joke. She probably thought I was an idiot, a lustful imbecile, with no control over my emotions. As
I closed the front door behind me, the boner subsided slightly, but I knew my balls were going to be sensitive for a while.
My behavior was unacceptable, and this could not happen again. I would apologize to her again tonight, maybe buy her a small bunch of flowers – yellow to show my intention of being friends. No, white flowers, how presumptuous of me to think we can even be friends. Maybe simple white daisies – that should set the tone for an honest apology without any other intentions.
*
As I was about to leave the office, Nerina handed me a bunch of white daisies with a large yellow ribbon around them. Nerina added, “There was a cute teddy and I wondered if she likes cute and cuddly, or if she would prefer chocolates. I couldn’t make up my mind, so I bought one of each. At least if she doesn’t like the teddy, Piper will find a place for it, and if she’s not into chocolates, you can still eat them.”
“Thank you, Nerina. Are you sure the extra gifts won’t give the wrong impression?”
She pulled the side of her lip up slightly as she was thinking about it, and added, “No, I don’t think so. Girls like to be spoiled a little, and if she is as good a nanny as you’ve explained to me, you have to treat her like gold. You don’t want her to feel unappreciated.”
I accepted the explanation and must have looked like an idiot, with my briefcase and trying to grab everything from Nerina with one hand. “Wait a minute.” Nerina handed me a gift bag and placed everything in it and then handed it back to me. “This is what I had in mind.”
When I got back in the car, I changed my mind and decided the extra gift was too much. Instead, I’d keep it in the car – I didn’t want to appear desperate. Or I’d take it out and give the teddy to Piper first and then tell her the flowers were an afterthought, as I realized I had to apologize again. I was such an idiot, maybe I should’ve only focused on getting back home and then let the scene play out by itself. It was no use planning every single detail of the stage if Sara didn’t even know her words or what part she should be acting.