by Helen Lacey
When Joley woke up she was alone. The bedside lamp was on, the clock on the side table read nearly eleven o’clock. She flipped over and sat up. The big bed seemed huge and she scrambled to the edge, flicking her hand along the bottom in search of her negligee. When she came up empty Joley opted for Nate’s T-shirt and slipped it over her head.
She had a bathroom stop and after one look at her mussed up hair realized no amount of finger combing would fix the problem. So she shrugged and headed from the room. She heard an odd clanging sound coming from the rear of the house and followed the noise into the games room.
As she rounded the door, she spotted Nate standing by the pool table, dressed only in jeans slung low on his waist with the top snap undone, and cue in his hand.
He took a shot that sunk a ball. “Did I wake you?”
Joley shook her head. Morning After’s weren’t her thing. But considering this was still the middle of the night, she felt even less equipped to handle it. “Have you eaten?”
“Not yet.” He took another shot.
The pasta in the oven didn’t appeal. “I could make a sandwich.”
“Sounds good.” He shot another ball then placed the cue on the table. “Want some help?”
Joley nodded. The mood seemed odd between them. Did he regret having sex with her? Had she disappointed him somehow? Making love with Nate had been extraordinary to her limited experience. Out of this world. And it had cemented in her heart what she already suspected. I’m in love with him. Completely and profoundly. It was unlike any feeling she’d experienced before. Even those she’d had for Dale.
She turned and headed for the kitchen. It took a couple of minutes to select cold meat, cheese and cut slices of sourdough bread. Keeping her hands busy kept her mind from over-thinking.
“You know, you look really good in my shirt.”
She looked up. Nate stood in the doorway, one shoulder resting against the architrave. “I’m getting used to wearing your clothes,” she said, remembering the outfit she’d worn back from the hotel the night of the wedding.
She was getting used to other things too. Like working alongside him and learning so much about the horses she loved. Understanding what running a place the size of Gwendonna meant. What made him laugh. What movies he liked, his favorite food…all the everyday things that came from sharing a life together. Being in his kitchen, making a botched job of slicing bread and sneaking looks at his bare chest seemed incredibly normal.
Yes, she was getting used to it all.
Nate pushed himself off the door and came fully into the room. “So,” he said as he walked around the counter and stood behind her. “You want to talk now?”
She could feel the heat of him against her back. “I don’t regret it. Do you?”
He moved closer. “Making love with you? No.”
Joley decided there was little point in being coy. “You seem far away.”
Nate sighed and grasped her arms, easing her back against his chest. “I’m right here.”
Joley stopped stacking the bread and leaned into him. His arms were strong around her. It made her feel safe. She turned in his embrace and invited his kiss, the bread and everything else quickly forgotten.
Chapter Twelve
“Something’s changed?”
Joley swung her attention from the ornate bridle she’d been admiring and met Lynette’s gaze. The other woman was watching her with a smile, both brows up high.
“Hmmm?”
“Between you and Nate, right?”
They’d been in Mulhany Crossing for a couple of hours. Nate was with Marshall checking out a Palouse colt Marshall’s younger sister was considering buying, while Joley remained at the saddlers with Lynette. It was Friday, Nate had been her lover since Monday—and Joley was flying on a wave of sexual euphoria unlike any she’d ever known. Intimacy had drawn them closer. There hadn’t been any words, or declarations, but she felt it. Everything they shared had deeper meaning, every kiss, every conversation, even simply holding his hand while they watched T.V. The words would come, she was sure of it.
He’d opened up so much—his ex-wife’s betrayal, the abandonment he’d felt when his mother bailed, the loss of his father. It made Joley fall in love with him all the more. Nate made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman on the planet. His unabashed reverence for her body was undeniable. Sometimes, they made love like there was no tomorrow, like each kiss would be their last. Other times, it was quiet, gentle and soul wrenching.
And they never spoke of the flight school. Or of her leaving.
But it was there, like and elephant in the room, just waiting to wreak havoc.
She looked at Lynette. Joley had never been the kiss and tell type, but she liked the other woman and knew they were becoming friends. “Right,” she admitted.
Lynette smiled. “I knew it. Good for you. No wonder he looked so chipper this morning.”
Joley knew she looked chipper herself. There was a glow about her cheeks and a silly grin she couldn’t control curving her mouth. “No wonder.”
Lynette laughed. “Gosh, I remember that look. When Marshall and I were first married we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.”
“And now?”
“Oh, you know, the tide changes. Don’t get me wrong, I adore my gorgeous husband. But thirteen years later…” Her voice trailed and she looked serious all of a sudden. “Promise me something?”
Joley nodded uncertainly. “Okay.”
Lynette drew in a sharp breath. “Don’t let Marshall be alone.”
When she realized what Lynette was saying, Joley shook her head. “I don’t really think—”
“When I’m gone, promise me you and Nate will make sure he’s okay. I don’t want him to be alone. I don’t want him to waste time on grief. I want him to marry again. To love again.”
It was a huge promise, and one Joley wasn’t sure she could undertake. “I might not be here,” she said and was struck by a heavy pain when she realized that could be true, and more pain, when she acknowledged that her new friend may not be around.
“You’re not staying?”
Joley quietly explained how she and Nate had initially agreed to a one-month stay. My first two weeks are up. It hurt just thinking about it. “I’ll talk to Nate. I’ll make sure he knows how you feel.”
Lynette smiled gently. “I can’t imagine Nate letting you go.”
Part of Joley didn’t want to imagine it. But reality had to intrude at some point. “I don’t know what will happen.”
The other woman looked at her quizzically. “Maybe you should tell him how you feel about him.”
Joley considered denying that she felt anything for Nate, but then only shrugged. “He doesn’t want what I want.”
“He might just be scared to admit it.”
Nate scared? She couldn’t imagine him afraid of anything. She’d come to Gwendonna to get her business back. Instead, she’d fallen head over heels for Nate. A man who didn’t believe in love. How could she tell him what she was feeling? She knew the longer she stayed the harder it would be to leave. And her heart, she knew, would be broken either way.
***
“You’re very quiet. Everything alright?”
They were on their way home later that afternoon when Nate asked the question. Beside him, Joley seemed tense. He took hold of her hand and kissed her knuckles.
“Fine,” she said and smiled. “Just thinking about something Lynette said.”
“What was that?”
“She’s worried about Marshall…you know, being alone, when she’s gone.”
Typical of Lynette to worry about someone else when she was the one with the death sentence. “Well, it won’t be easy for him, that’s for sure.”
“Does he say much about it?”
Nate kissed her knuckles again then placed her hand on his thigh. “Well, most guys don’t sit around talking about their feelings to one another. We’re strange creatures that wa
y.”
Joley gripped his leg in that way he was becoming used to. “She’s worried and thinks he may not recover.”
“Marshall is strong enough to get through whatever he’s faced with,” Nate said, thinking of the tough road ahead for his friend.
She was silent for the remainder of the trip. Nate worked one of the colts that afternoon and gave Joley some quiet time with her horse. The big gelding had recovered well from his injury and was now completely sound. By the time Nate headed back to the house, Joley had already finished up for the afternoon. Her quietness alerted him that something was definitely wrong, something other than the conversation she’d had with Lynette. Determined to find out what it was, he showered, changed and went to find her.
She was in the front living room, curled inside her favorite chair.
He watched her for a moment. A strange sensation wavered low in his gut. She was so beautiful. The late afternoon sun streamed through the wide French doors and she stared out, deep in thought. Watching her, he couldn’t quite get enough air into his lungs. He hadn’t planned on this. Wanting Joley had turned into something else entirely. Logic had disappeared. In its place was a feeling excruciatingly intense. An unfamiliar feeling that confused the hell out of him.
“Rachel left steaks out,” she said. “Feel like risking it and letting me cook?”
Nate managed a grin. “I’m game. But did you want to talk first?”
She nodded, like she expected it. “That’s a good idea.”
He walked into the room and sat on the sofa. “You’ve been distracted today?”
“Yes,” she agreed. “I have some things on my mind.”
Like her business. Like Patrick? He couldn’t help thinking it, wondering if she was pining after the other man and then cursed the stupid jealousy churning through his blood. “Like what?”
She shrugged but Nate wasn’t fooled. Something was definitely wrong.
“Things have changed between us.”
Naturally, Nate wanted to say. Wonderfully, he almost added, and then figured he’d sound like a fool. Instead, he kept his mouth shut and let her speak.
“We’ve become…close,” she said. “With that comes a certain responsibility.”
Nate had no idea where she was heading. “And?”
“And I want to be completely honest with you.”
His stomach dropped. From the beginning, he’d wanted honesty. Faced with it, Nate wasn’t sure he was ready to hear her truth now. “Okay, I’m listening.”
“We haven’t talked about what happens when my month is up.”
No, they hadn’t. Nate shrugged, his heart pounding. “That depends on what you want to happen.”
“It’s not only about me, Nate.” She sighed heavily, as though burdened by something painful. “Not since I’ve—”
His phone buzzed and she stopped speaking. He considered letting it ring out but changed his mind when he recognized the number. The call lasted barely a minute. When he disconnected Nate looked towards Joley. She still sat on the chair, one leg curled underneath the other.
“My mother,” he explained. “She’s coming for a visit.”
Joley’s eyes widened. “To check me out?”
“Probably.” Nate tossed the cell phone onto the sofa. “Your mother’s coming too.”
She jerked forward. “Ella? Coming here? But our mothers’ don’t even know one another?”
“They do now. Gabby,” Nate supplied. “Her idea apparently. They’ll all be here tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? But how—”
“They’re flying in,” Nate said igniting the annoyance and resentment climbing across his skin. “With Patrick.”
***The last person Joley wanted to see was Ella. Or Patrick. She didn’t want her relationship with Nate to be on show for anyone, especially not her two greatest critics.
Nate had gone to collect them from the airstrip and Joley knew when her mother arrived at Gwendonna she would be all over her with questions. And Patrick? Who knew what her best friend would be like? She’d avoided his emails and calls for two weeks. With the contract pilot easily managing the workload at the flight school, Joley couldn’t believe how quickly she’d gotten used to her life revolving around Gwendonna and Nate. It felt like a glove made for her hand. The life she’d been looking for.
The life and the man she loved.
Once the weekend was over, she’d talk with Nate. Joley needed to know how he felt about her. She had experienced so many emotions during the past couple of weeks. There had been a quiet intensity to the way he’d made love to her the night before. After his mother’s telephone call, they’d gone to the kitchen and prepared dinner, their talk postponed because Joley wasn’t in any frame of mind to say what she’d almost admitted. That she wanted more than a logical, emotionless relationship. And if he couldn’t give her more, she knew she had to leave Gwendonna and never look back. As much as that would break her heart.
But she hadn’t told him that. Once the dishes were done and they’d watched television for an hour or so, Nate had pulled Joley to her feet and walked her down the hall to his bedroom. They’d showered together and fallen into bed, without words, without anything other than touch transcending into complete surrender and pleasure beyond her wildest dreams.
Exhausted and spent, they’d slept. When Joley awoke the following morning Nate had already left. She returned to her own room, dressed in a long denim skirt, a red knit top and brushed her hair into manageable waves.
Rachel was in the kitchen preparing brunch and Joley helped out for a while. The older woman must have known Joley didn’t spend the nights in her own bed, but was too polite to mention it. The fact that a few of her belongings had strayed into Nate’s bedroom and ensuite bathroom made it obvious they were sleeping together. Silly, she supposed, to harbor such old-fashioned ideas, but she did. Even during her relationship with Paul she’d never actually lived with him. It had been one or two nights at the most and they hadn’t gone on vacation together. Perhaps it was some hang up from the shame she’d experienced when her tawdry relationship with Dale had ended. Sharing Nate’s home was a whole new experience.
She was finishing off coffee when she heard the familiar sound of Nate’s truck crunching over the gravel driveway. Joley headed for the front door and stepped across the threshold into the morning sunshine. She spotted Ella first, dressed in white Capri’s and a gold Lurex top, which was synched with a wide belt. Nate’s mother, Beverly looked somewhat more appropriate in dark slacks and striped shirt. She sported a gray bob and looked the epitome of old style money. As Gabby came around the truck, Joley noticed the beginning of her baby bump. Patrick was behind his wife, holding two bags. Nate, Joley noticed, was looking at her as she observed the visitors. She smiled at him because it was all she could manage, and waited for the inevitable bombardment of questions from her mother.
Ella hobbled over the gravel in her heels and was quickly across the yard and up the steps, arms outstretched. “You look marvelous, Jolene,” she said as they embraced.
Joley hugged her mother and smiled. “Thanks. How was the flight?” she asked, knowing her mother wouldn’t have cared for a trip in Patrick’s old Cessna.
“Noisy. But you know me and flying. I’ve never understood your passion for it.”
“How’s Dad?” she asked, ignoring the tiny dig.
Ella raised her brows. “At home. I couldn’t get him to come with us.”
Joley imagined her father enjoying his alone time and grinned. “Well, you’re here.”
“Yes,” Ella agreed. “And a wonderful idea of Gabby’s. Beverly and I are getting along like a house on fire.”
Joley stole another glance towards Nate. He was speaking with his sister and had an arm draped companionably around her shoulders as they walked towards the house, while Beverly Spears walked behind, alongside Patrick.
Gabby squealed when she saw her and ambled quickly up the steps. “Gosh, it’s good to see you,
” the other woman said cheerfully, hugging her close. “This life obviously agrees with you.” She grinned and hugged her again, whispering close to her ear. “Or maybe it’s my brother that’s given you that glowing look.”
Glad no one could hear, Joley pulled back and smiled. Nate came up the stairs and she shook Beverly’s hand. That done, Nate ushered Ella and his mother inside. Joley was about to follow when Patrick caught her arm.
“Hey, it’s so good to see you.” He bent to kiss her cheek.
“You too,” she said and when Patrick’s expression narrowed Joley knew she was outed. He knew her too well to be fooled—knew she didn’t want them intruding.
“It’s only for two nights,” he said quietly as they moved towards the door. “We’ll be gone Monday and you’ll have Garrigan all to yourself again.”
Joley was tempted to smack his face, friend or not. But Nate was just inside the doorway and she knew he’d pick up on her mood. She plastered on a broad smile, ignored Patrick’s comment and headed through the door.
Rachel had laid out brunch by the pool. The long table was covered in a bright cloth and the food set out buffet style. Joley fussed around the plates and didn’t hear Nate come up behind her.
“Everything okay?” he asked and touched her elbow.
Joley nodded. “Of course.”
His eyes narrowed. “Did Cohen say something to upset you?”
She experienced a silly thrill thinking he considered her his woman enough to be concerned about her. “No. I’m fine. Just not sure what role I’m meant to playing here.”
“You’re my…guest. And we’re lovers,” he said frankly. “You share my bed, which means you’re the mistress of this house. Play that out however you like.”
He swept her mouth up in a kiss that had ownership stamped all over it. And Joley didn’t mind one little bit. Not even when Beverly stepped onto the patio and caught them red-handed.
Ella, Gabby and Patrick emerged a few moments later. While Gabby showed off her baby belly to her brother, Ella cornered her by the drinks table.