by Wendi Zwaduk
Jaden giggled, breaking the heavy mood. “Everyone has to be young and foolish at least once in their lives. Don’t kick your ass because things weren’t parent-approved. Look at my life. I’m not an after-school special.”
He nodded. “You’re right. Now I know why I care about you so much.” He kissed her temple. Being with her made telling his past so much easier. “Looking back, I thought I loved her. I fell hard for her and told my parents where to get off. But now I realise I loved the idea of being with someone. She laughed, drank, and made no excuses. I proposed after three dates and she said yes. I thought I knew what I was doing.”
She smoothed her hand over his cheek. “You didn’t?”
“Not a clue.” He rubbed his forehead. “I bought her a house, a new car, and offered to help her care for her daughter. At first, it was the best. She helped me deal with Mom and Dad passing within a couple weeks of each other and cheered when I was hired on here at the department. Sydney’s father was in the picture and cool about the situation. Syd, Addy, and I were a team. But then nine months into the marriage, Addy changed. She said it was a sickness, but I found out later that she wasn’t telling me the whole truth.”
He sighed. His heart felt lighter, but the devastation of his relationship with Addy tore at old scars. “She had a boyfriend on the side as well as a pretty serious addiction to sleeping pills and alcohol.”
“When you found out, you stopping trusting, didn’t you?”
“It wasn’t when—it was how.” Once again, he nodded. “I wanted things to work with her so bad. I figured that if I loved her enough, then she’d change. I took care of her daughter, Syd. It took me five years, two totalled cars, and my being busted for drug possession to realise I wasn’t man enough for her to overcome her addictions.”
“You?” Her brow furrowed. “No.”
“Normally I took the cruiser to work because it was easier. No big deal. But earlier in the week I’d been in a fender bender as part of a high speed chase, so I had Addy take me to work. In Crawford, she floored it through the square. She was stopped and the officer recognised the both of us. Because she complained she needed to get ‘something’ from the glove box, he searched the vehicle. He found two dime baggies of cocaine and a needle. I was livid.” He clenched his fist. The past still pissed him off.
“I know how that feels. I was busted for drug paraphernalia when I was sixteen. It sucks.”
“Sucks? They weren’t mine, but dammit, Mac didn’t believe me right away.”
Jaden inched away from him. Her eyes widened.
“It took me six weeks of work and the complete destruction of my life to clear my name. I got my job back by a thread. I’m not going through that again. Addy thought the whole thing was a joke until I served her with divorce papers.”
Although her voice dropped to a whisper, Jaden’s question was clear. “What happened?”
“She took the papers and threw them on the lawn before she set the house ablaze. When she drove off, she headed for the Halden Reservoir. Bobby Hutchins found her body three days later. She’d mainlined too many drugs and passed out behind the wheel. She made it far enough into the water that the cabin filled. Even if she’d regained consciousness, she would have had little chance of surviving.”
Jaden pressed her head against his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made you tell the story. I shouldn’t have been so flippant.”
He cleared his throat. Damn, the past sounded bad. “What did Summer tell you? The stories went around town like the plague. In one, I made her leave. In another version, I chased her. I once heard she stopped to see a boyfriend before she drove headlong into the water.”
“She said I was a nice girl, but don’t expect much from you. You like danger and put a lot on the line, but you’re cautious. You aren’t the settling-down type and you won’t ever marry again. Without coming right out with it, she hinted I should find someone else.” Twining her arms around his neck, she rubbed the back of his head. “No woman would ever match the love and respect you had for Addy, but she figured you were head-over-heels for me.”
He turned her words over in his mind. Not marry again? Ever? Not quite. His perfect match was in his arms. And to let her get away? To find someone else? No sir, he didn’t like that thought one bit. “She’s wrong. A sweet woman I dated for a while, but she’s terribly wrong about some of her conclusions. I trust her when it comes to animals, but not with my heart.” He tipped her chin to gaze into her eyes. “Should I entrust my heart to you?”
Her lips parted a fraction of an inch. If he were home, he’d plunder her sweetness until they both screamed. At the hospital he needed to use decorum. People expected more out of cops, even when they were off-duty.
He brushed a thumb over her cheek, savouring her soft skin. All the things he’d seen in Addison blossomed in Jaden, but with Jaden, she didn’t project an image—she was who she was. Addy had been on the edge of control. Jaden had lived through chaos and had risen above it.
Before he could explain more, a doctor came out into the waiting room. “Ms. Haydenweir?”
Jaden sat up and turned. “That’s me!” She clamped a hand over her mouth once she realised she’d shouted. A couple of other people in the room turned and glared. She groaned. “Sorry.”
Marlon rubbed her back. “It’s okay. You didn’t hurt anything. You just woke up a couple of other visitors. They’ll deal.”
The doctor, clad in buff-coloured scrubs, strode towards them. He yanked the cartoon character bandana off his head and ran his fingers through his hair. “You’re Jaden Haydenweir? I’m Doctor Sam McDonald. I specialise in geriatric services.” He cocked a brow. “You don’t match the image in my head, which is odd because Judi can’t stop telling me about you. I expected blue tights and an S on your chest or something.”
She extended her hand. “I see. Nice to meet you, Doctor McDonald. This is my—this is Marlon Cross.” Licking her lips, more in a nervous gesture than anything, Jaden stood. “I realise you can’t share too many details because I’m not family, but when can we see her?”
Marlon shook hands with the doctor, stymied that Jaden had stumbled over her description of their relationship. After all his honesty and her declaration, was she not sure of her feelings? They’d sort a lot of issues out later, when things calmed down. Right now, he’d be her strength.
Jaden clutched Marlon’s arm. Damn, she didn’t do well under pressure. Thank God he offered her strength. She wanted to shout from the rooftops that she loved Marlon. Hell, she wanted to tattoo his damned name right above the lily tattoo at the base of her spine. Why had she fumbled? She had no idea, other than that his gaze had turned to ice when she’d refused to discuss her past. And now he looked like he could blow a gasket. Crap.
Dr McDonald tucked his bandana into his breast pocket. “Deputy Cross, I think I met you a couple of weeks ago when we had the four-car pile-up accident victims come through here. Next time, let’s meet under happier circumstances.” He stuck the chart under his arm and twined his fingers. “Long and short, Judi had a heart attack. She had two major blockages that I was able to open with stents. She’ll recover, but I’m not sure she’ll be able to go home. Her son can better make that decision. I tell you this because she insisted I should. Jaden, you take care of her, correct?”
She wrapped her fingers around Marlon’s thick wrist. “I take care of her dog, but I live with her. We take care of each other, I guess.”
The doctor grinned. “How sweet.” His brow wrinkled. “You know, you look familiar. I’ll bet you get that a lot. I just can’t place it.” He slid the chart from under his arm and shuffled the pages. “Her son is coming in, but I’ll take you back. She’s a little wrung out, so don’t be surprised. She was asleep.”
Jaden clung to Marlon and followed Dr McDonald down the hallway. She held back a step. “Marlon?”
His gaze, though hard, focussed on her. Whatever walls she’d breached with Marlon had filled
in thicker than before.
“I’m sorry. This is really hard for me.” She mentally pleaded for him to understand. But how? She wasn’t even sure if she understood what was going on. One minute, she was cuddling with Marlon and Judi was fine, the next—
Hell.
He clenched his jaw. His face otherwise remained expressionless. “We’ll talk about it later.”
She wondered what was going through his mind. Her stomach churned. Was this how he looked during an interrogation? Marlon released her hand and shoved his fists into his pockets. Why did going into Judi’s room scare her more than a gauntlet of paparazzi?
When she rounded the corner into Judi’s room, she gasped. Her friend, once vibrant and full of life, lay limp and pale. Her heart clenched. If she could have traded places, she would’ve.
Judi smiled, faint, but there. “Sorry I caused such a ruckus. But you know how I like drama.” She reached for Jaden’s hand. “Doc says I probably won’t make it home.”
Jaden gasped. “Don’t say those things.” She choked back a cry. “You’ll pull through.”
Marlon smoothed his hand over her shoulder, giving her a bit of comfort. “You’ll make it.”
Though laboured, Judi smiled. “I’ll pull through. Goodness. And I thought I liked a good dramatic scene! What I meant was that I won’t be coming back to the house. They want me to go to a home where a nurse can keep an eye on me. They think I’m a flight risk or a something. I might try to walk a tight rope or two-step down at the Ricochet.”
“But what about Sparks? Riley? They need you. I need you.”
Judi patted Jaden’s hand. “You have Marlon. I see a bright future for you two. Once you work out your issues, you’ll be golden. And you have the dogs and the cats. I wasn’t sure when I hired you that you’d take to Sparks. He smells, he’s pushy, and he’s noisy, but you did and you made me proud. Taking Riley in along with the cats warmed my heart.”
Tears streamed down Jaden’s cheeks. “But where will I live? It’s not like I can keep the house or the animals.”
Judi cocked her head. “Honey, you don’t have to move until Steven sells the house, since he’s assumed power of attorney. I’ll fight him on it so you have a place to kip down. As for the critters, once he puts the house on the market, take them with you. If you can save them, then that’s four animals that will have a better life.”
Marlon touched Jaden’s shoulder. The warmth in his grasp offered a little comfort. “If you’ll give me a chance, I have an idea.”
Jaden turned and wiped her cheeks. If she said anything, she’d bite his head off. He probably wanted her to send them to the shelter. Hell, no! She’d tell him to shove his ideas up his ass first. For the animals and Judi, she’d listen. Clamping her mouth shut, she glared at him.
He dropped his chin to his chest. “I have extra room and I like critters.”
Jaden sniffled. Why the hell couldn’t she keep it together? Even during that time of the month, she’d never been this hormonal. She took a deep breath. “I won’t split them up. You can’t make me.”
Judi’s voice, a bit stronger and harder, came from over her shoulder. “Jaden. Swallow your pride. You worked too hard to let this little setback knock you down.”
She stared at the wrinkles on his T-shirt. “He doesn’t trust me.”
Marlon knelt next to her. “I’m offering you an out.”
Judi clapped and tittered. “So does this mean I need to prepare for a wedding? I like the colour pink.”
His eyes darkened, like when he was turned on. Jaden blinked back fresh tears.
Marlon laughed in his low voice. “I don’t know that the boys will like the lack of a yard, but I insist you all live with me—at least for a little bit.” He nodded to Judi. “You get better and I’ll make sure you can wear whatever colour you like.”
Jaden’s heart fluttered within her chest. Had he just alluded to…? Did he mean…? She grasped the side rail on the bed to keep herself from dropping onto the floor.
A voice from the doorway interrupted their private moment. “Mom! Mom!”
Jaden refocussed her gaze on Steven. The stout man filled the doorway. His belly hung over his belt. A lock of thin, strawberry blond hair fluttered on the top of his head as he surged into the room. His brown eyes blazed. “You scared me. Was this because of the dog? I told you the doctors were wrong. Taking care of him overextends your strength and adds to your stress.” He nodded to Jaden. “Why are you in my mother’s room? Did the dog do this or was it the lunatic photographers that hang out outside the house because of you?”
Judi’s giggles stopped. “Don’t get your underwear bunched. Steven, you need to calm down before they give you the bed next door. There aren’t any photographers outside my house. Jaden’s taking Sparky home while I recuperate. Don’t you dare give her static.”
Steven grunted, making Jaden wonder yet again how Judi could have given birth to such a rude man. Maybe life had made him grumpy. She nibbled the inside of her cheek. Still, he ought to be thankful he had his mother around. Forcing a smile to her lips, she nodded to Marlon. “Why don’t we leave them alone? It’s late.”
Steven nodded. “I’d appreciate that. She’s not your mother.”
Jaden winced. Nope, she wasn’t. Judi couldn’t even claim her as a granddaughter. She stood and gave Judi a hug. “I’ll be back to see you tomorrow.”
“You’d better. I’ll miss my afternoon gossip shows and I want you to fill me in.”
“Consider it done.” Jaden forced a watery smile. “I’ll even bring magazines.” Maybe Judi wasn’t her mother, but she was damned close. Heat, and not from Marlon, enveloped her. A rush of thoughts and emotions battled in her mind. She couldn’t breathe. Gasping, she muttered a goodbye and escaped the room.
She burst through the stairwell door and stopped on the landing. The cold walls of the hospital reminded her of the last few moments with her mother. The pain settled low in her belly like a stone. She collapsed on the top step. Even though Marlon wanted her and the animals, he’d change his mind. Men always did. She had nothing other than the furry children—no money, no real home. And then there was Marlon…
God, her mind swam. He wanted her, but he didn’t. She wanted him, but her fears of jumping into the great unknown prevented her from accepting his kindness. And if the circus of Hollywood made its way to Crawford…he’d leave her in a hot minute.
Stop being negative and move forwards.
She wasn’t sure when he arrived, but Marlon’s strong arms enfolded her once he sat down. His breath warmed her neck and his whiskers tickled her ear. She laced her fingers with his. A smattering of words teetered on her tongue, yet she remained quiet.
Marlon broke the silence. “Hey, Jaden Marie, you aren’t in this alone.”
Her chest heaved. “I don’t want your pity.”
Chapter Sixteen
Marlon nuzzled her cheek. So many things were so fucked up. So many questions unanswered. Why couldn’t he either ‘fess up to his feelings or walk away?
Jaden made his heart light, even when she asked too many questions and nibbled her bottom lip raw. He wanted to kiss every inch of her until she shrieked his name. Even Addy had never given him a rush like being with Jaden. And they’d had—what? A little more than a few weeks together? Each night of passion was ingrained into his permanent memory. Could he let her go? The idea scared him. Did he need her enough to make things permanent? Damn straight. She moved him like the air he breathed.
Her scent washed over him. She understood him and soothed him when he needed her arms to hold him. He wasn’t himself without her to make him whole. “Who said anything about pity? Honey, I’m here for you. Life went berserk in the last twenty-four hours. Anyone would crumble. It’s expected.”
She sniffled, but didn’t pull away. “You haven’t fallen apart.”
“I’m not perfect. I fuck stuff up all the time.” He kissed her neck where it connected to her shoulder, drawing f
rom her the feathery sigh he loved so much. He shifted his hips to relieve the ache in his heart. She brought out the best and the worst in him. “Summer doesn’t lie. I’m not a relationship-slash-commitment kind of guy, but I am certainly cautious. I’d like to continue seeing you, but I can’t when you won’t tell me everything.”
Turning, she cupped his cheek and rested her forehead against his. Her silky hair smoothed against his skin. “I come with a lot of baggage—and not just the furry kind.”
“From the first moment I questioned you at the station, I wanted you. I’m game for whatever you can throw at me, Jaden Marie—as long as you’re honest.”
She sighed. “We need to get back to Judi’s. The dogs will need to pee, I’m worn out, and tomorrow’s Halloween. So much for passing out candy.”
“Then let’s go home.” He nodded. I don’t have to work until seven tomorrow. “I’ll keep you and the critters company.”
“Company? I’d love the company. Especially if we’re—” Her eyes sparkled. “—naked.”
He cocked a brow. Oh, so she wanted to play dirty? He’d take that wager. “Are you issuing me a challenge?” One he could fulfil all night long? Hell, yes.
Her shoulder barely moved in a shrug. “Maybe.” She smacked her lips and grinned. “I mean, there is a trick to sex with an audience. Look how Sparks freaks when we kiss. Are you up for their challenge? I’m easy to sway since I liked you from the start.”
Dipping in for a kiss, he cupped the back of her head. “If you’re my prize, then I’m in for one hell of a time.”