Her fears were confirmed when she opened the door. Her mother sat in her rocking chair, an afghan over her lap, her eyes empty and hollow. Something was definitely wrong.
“Mom? What is it?” Avery asked, rushing over to sit beside her mother. A knot formed in her stomach as she waited for her mom to respond. What could have her mother up so late at night? Where was Dad?
Oh, no ... it wasn’t - nothing had happened to Dad, had it?
“Is Daddy okay?” Avery whispered.
Her mother nodded, before her face crumpled and she cried. She pulled something out from under the afghan. A long, white envelope. What could be so important in that little letter that had her mother all twisted up inside? “This came for you,” she said softly, almost so low that Avery couldn’t hear. Thank goodness for lip reading.
For her? Avery accepted the letter from her mother’s extended hand. Her mom’s hand was cold and clammy, and that’s when Avery noticed she was trembling. “I don’t understand.” She held the letter up. The return address and name didn’t ring any bells, but they must have to her mother, otherwise she wouldn’t be acting this way. The suspense was killing her!
“I think your birth parents are finally trying to contact you.” Her mother’s face crumpled again, the tears flowing down her cheeks.
Avery dropped the letter on the ground as if it were a hot pan and flew into her mom’s embrace.
Chapter Two
“There’s nothing that indicates this, Mom. Unless you know something I don’t,” Avery said, cautiously picking up the letter again. “Nothing gives anything away. To an ordinary eye, it looks like a normal letter.” She searched her mother’s gaze, waiting for some kind of answer as to why she was fretting so much.
“It was delivered officially, on your birthday,” her mom said solemnly, shifting her gaze.
Could this really be the moment Avery had longed for?
For years and years, Avery knew nothing about her history. She’d always wondered about her background, but as time passed, she gave up hope that she’d ever know.
And yet, that hope could be staring right back at her in an unopened envelope as her mother fell apart.
Avery didn’t want to be, but she was hopeful. Mom was most likely way off, but she wouldn’t know unless she opened that letter. It’s not that she didn’t love her mom and dad, but she needed to understand where she came from. It stopped her from fully living, and loving. Avery wanted to feel whole. She hated the fact that while she was absolutely loved, wanted, cherished, and adored, she still had an empty void in her heart that only knowing would fill.
It pained her sometimes, to look her mom and dad in the eye, feeling like shit for it not being enough. It should have been enough! Those were the worst days, where she had conflicting emotions about her past. Despite how much the Callimers loved and cared for her, some days she hated the world for the abandonment from her biological parents. The questions in her mind were always why? Why wasn’t she enough for them? She couldn’t ever express those feelings. No one would ever understand. It was a hidden pain within her. Until she took up songwriting. It had become a lyrical journey to the depths of her heart.
With everyone happy and wanting to celebrate her birthday, it made matters worse. How could they celebrate a day when no one knew when she had actually been born? They were only guessing that Avery had been no more than a day old when she’d been found. So they all declared that date her birthday. Avery dreaded it every year. It was a painful reminder of things she didn’t know about herself.
She couldn’t fault the Callimers. They tried. It was Avery that never said how she felt about it. For the most part, she had an honest relationship with her adoptive parents. Unless it came down to her feelings about being adopted. If Avery could learn real facts about her life, it would be easier.
She knew nothing about her biological parents. Not a single thing.
That was the part that hurt the most. Not knowing.
It gave her no desire to celebrate a birthday.
“That still doesn’t mean anything.” Avery wrapped an arm around her mother, coaxing her to look up. “What’s got you so upset?”
“It’s just one of those feelings.” Mom wiped her tears away and tried to give Avery a half hearted smile. “I’m sorry. I do this so often lately, don’t I? I’m just getting set in my old, silly ways.”
Avery hugged her tight. “Don’t say that. I love you. I love you and Daddy both, and I don’t know where I’d be without you.” Sure she did. She wouldn’t be as loved. Despite her nagging thoughts in the back of her mind, Avery always knew she was wanted by the Callimers. That was the most important feeling of all.
“We couldn’t give you much. I wanted so much more for you, Avery. You were a blessing that came to us by surprise, and I cherish every minute of it. I was always afraid your birth parents would realize what they’d lost and come back for you. That fear has only been amplified in the last few years.”
Avery’s heart fluttered. “Don’t you realize how much you have given me, though? You took me in, you fought for me when you didn’t have to. You raised me, scolded me when I was bad. You are the reason I am who I am now. How could you ever think you haven’t done enough? Oh, Mom, where is this coming from? You’re scaring me.” Goosebumps broke out on her arms. Avery rubbed them, hoping to ease the chill she suddenly had. She’d never heard her mother talk like this. It was eerie and strange, to say the least. And this is why I could never express that void. Mom already worried about not giving her enough. What would that hidden feeling make her feel?
Her mother’s eyes brimmed with tears again. “Are you sure? Wouldn’t you have been better off with younger parents, siblings, not running an inn with strangers coming in and out of your daily routine?”
Avery shook her head. “Growing up was wonderful with you. I don’t understand why you’re feeling and talking this way. If I have ever given you the impression that I wasn’t thankful for everything you’ve given me...” She trailed her voice off. Despite everything, Avery had been happy. She had a place to go home to. She had discipline, someone to set her straight when she went astray. What could she say to help her mom right now? “Mom, this anxiety is no good for you. Come on, why not get ready for bed and we’ll go have some girl time tomorrow evening?” She smiled, in hopes that her mom would agree and they could get some rest. From the dark circles under the aging woman’s eyes, Avery guessed that she needed it. Badly. Then they could forget about the letter that probably didn’t mean a thing anyway and be done with it. Avery folded it into the back pocket of her jeans and stood, holding a hand out to help her mother up. When she stood, Avery hugged her for a long time before they parted. Avery gave her a peck on the cheek and smiled. “Good night. Get some sleep. I’ll see you and Daddy in the morning. I’ll help with breakfast at the inn tomorrow, and then I have to meet up with Jameson for lunch.” Her mom would be heartbroken at the thought of Avery and Jameson no longer a couple. She hadn’t yet told her the things Jameson had confided to her months ago. It had been another thing too easy to throw in the avoidance pile. No wonder everyone was on edge. It seemed like they all had something to hide.
After her mother had gone upstairs and Avery heard her bedroom door close with the usual squeak, she made sure the front door was locked up, turned off the lamp beside the rocking chair, and went up to her own room. The letter was burning a hole in her pocket. Once in the privacy of her own room, Avery sat down at the vanity against the wall, pulled the envelope out and set it on the oak desk. She stared at it for awhile, wondering who it could be from and what had her mother fretting so much over it. She didn’t like the worry that her mother carried on her shoulders so often, but Avery could understand the fear. She was all they had in the world. No grandchildren, not that they knew of anyway. They’d suffered so much loss that they didn’t want to let go of Avery for anything.
There was the reason Avery hadn’t left to chase her musical dreams. She didn’t w
ant to leave them and have something happen. They were getting up there in age, in their early seventies, and if Mom had to take one more heartache ... what would happen? Though she’d been told relentlessly to pursue a career in singing, Avery had to brush it off like she wasn’t particularly interested in making more out of it.
But she was.
And she hated to admit it to Mom and Dad.
The letter taunted.
Just open the stupid thing. Now Mom’s got you rattled!
Without another moment’s hesitation, Avery ripped open the envelope, carefully taking out the contents inside. It was a handwritten letter, scrawled in decently legible handwriting. Taking in a sharp breath, Avery read on.
Dear Avery,
I’m sure this is the last thing you’ll ever expect, and I may be getting my hopes up. My name is Rodney Morris, and I believe you are my daughter. There, I said it right off the bat. I’m not a man that beats around the bush. Your mother has finally admitted to me that she bore my child, though through a signed contract I’m not at liberty to state who she is. What pains me is that she left you in the middle of nowhere to advance in her own life. I won’t get into details about her, as I keep seeing red when thinking of her and what she’s done. If I had known about you ... I would have loved to have a daughter. I was blessed with three boys, and had always wanted a baby girl. Is that strange? Usually it’s a woman that’s longing for a girl, but for some reason, I did. Then I ran into your mother recently, she let it slip out about what happened. Maybe she was too drunk and didn’t mean to tell me, but regardless, she did. And then came the threats, but I made sure I was allowed to contact you.
It took me forever to track you down, but with the help of some very detailed private detectives, here I am, writing you this letter. I looked into your background and though you were left abandoned, it pleases me that you were taken in by such a loving and kind family. For that I am grateful.
I do hope that maybe we can correspond. I know this comes as a shock and may be difficult to fathom, but I would like to at least say that I knew you before my time is through on this earth.
Here is where you may reach me if you wish.
I hope you reach out.
Sincerely,
Rodney
Avery blew out a sharp breath. She scanned that letter three times before setting it down. Her hand trembled. What blew her mind is that her mother knew. She knew! She insisted that it was from a birth parent. Even a mother’s intuition wasn’t that good ... was it?
What to do with this information? She’d always been curious. And here it was, right here in her hand, though she’d never pictured it would be this easy, to be handed to her directly. She thought that if she ever pursued it that she would take years of searching and hitting dead ends and even then coming up with nothing.
But her father - if this was actually true, and he turned out to be legit - was looking for her.
Avery fingered the edges of the letter, unable to tear her eyes away from it, her mind spinning. What would Mom and Dad say to this? She couldn’t hide her true feelings this time. She had a natural curiosity. It wasn’t like they’d hate her for wanting to know. They had always understood that. Avery didn’t want them to hurt, or feel left out, or anything!
It was so late now, she had no one she could call or text about this. Jameson might be awake right now, but if they were on the verge of breaking up, Avery highly doubted that Jameson would be willing to listen to her at this point.
She sighed. Well, it was just better to go to bed. The letter, the information, everything - would be waiting for her in the morning. She could figure out the best way to handle everything after at least eight hours of rest. The faster she could end this day dubbed as her birthday, the better off she would be.
Chapter Three
Famished, Lucas walked into the dining hall of the inn. When was the last time he’d eaten a decent meal? The mouthwatering, intoxicating scent of pancakes, biscuits, and fresh fruit made his stomach grumble and his mouth salivate. He nodded at an elderly woman as he reached for a plate.
“Morning sir. How are you?” she asked, a smile spreading across her aged face.
“After a nice long sleep, a fresh shower, and the smell of this wonderful food, I’m doing great,” Lucas said, returning her smile. Wow. Everyone had been so friendly so far here. Definitely wasn’t something Lucas was used to. Too bad the circumstances for coming here weren’t for better reasons. An image of the lead singer from the band last night flashed in his mind. He wondered if she was just as swift in bed as she was on stage. And, cut! Whoa there. Where had that thought come from? Again, that was his manhood talking. Though he wouldn’t mind a roll in the hay with her, that wasn’t why he came to this little Texas town.
Far from it.
From the corner of his eye, a flash of movement piqued his interest, and he turned his head. Holy hell, there she was, sans her Stetson. She wore her hair up in a ponytail, covered with a hairnet as she hauled a huge plate of food right over toward him. It took her a few moments to realize that Lucas was standing there, but when she did, he had to keep from laughing at the startled look on her face as she nearly dropped the plate she’d been carrying. Priceless!
“What are you doing here?” she demanded, getting her balance and easing the plate onto the buffet table, right next to the rolls and fruit.
“That’s no way to greet a guest, is it?” Lucas slid her a cocky grin, enjoying the way she was put on the spot. So he’d gotten to her last night, too. Good.
Remember why you’re here. Tell your libido to stuff it.
Ha. Yeah right. Some parts of his body had a mind of their own. Like they weren’t attached to the big brain that was supposed to control everything. He bit back a chuckle.
“A guest? You’re staying here?” Her eyebrow raised, her face twisted up in confusion. “I didn’t see your name on the guest list.”
Lucas shot her a grin. “Small world, right? When I checked in, I was warned about a feisty woman. Who would have thought that was you, when I ran into - well, when you bumped into me last night.” Her cheeks flushed, and Lucas couldn’t contain his laughter.
“Well, I-” She sputtered. She put her hands on her hips. Fury leaped into her darkened eyes. “You shouldn’t speak to your hostess that way,” she shot back.
Lucas shifted his feet. He didn’t know why he was having so much fun pushing her buttons, other than it got him all hot and bothered. “You’re the gasoline to my fire. I don’t know why we’re bantering like this, but maybe we could start over. Have breakfast with me?” He gestured to the plate of food which was now getting cold. Time for a truce.
Her green eyes softened, as did her face, and she almost smiled. She moved her hands from her hips and let them hang at her sides. “I would, but I’m working.” She hiked her thumb behind her. “Speaking of which, I really should get back there. Enjoy your stay here.” With that, she pivoted. Lucas watched her round ass shake as she went back to the kitchen.
What was with him and finding those hot buttons? It wasn’t his intention from the beginning, but something about this woman ... she seemed to have so much on her mind and needed to relax. Yet he went and helped shove that stick further up her ass than it already was.
Lucas grabbed a container of orange juice, a rolled napkin with utensils and found a place to sit, ready to dig into the food. Two tables away, a young couple sat huddled together, feeding each other bites of pancake on a fork. After every bite they would kiss, giggle, and start all over again. Newlyweds perhaps? They had that glow. Lucas had seen it many times. And then watched it fade. It had happened to his parents, before they wasted away in their own little world, forgetting about the son they had. Love wasn’t for him, that’s for sure. That’s probably why he’d gained the playboy nickname. He followed thoughts based on the rising of his cock, instead of his heart. He never wanted to be burned again. In his line of work, that’s all he ever saw.
Avery ambled
out of the kitchen again, this time carrying a pitcher of orange juice. Lucas stabbed another bite of food and shoved it into his mouth. She walked with grace. She carried herself well, moving with confidence and ease. The only leak to what she really felt inside she held in her eyes ... like she was haunted by something. Another thing Lucas learned in his profession - how to read between the lines. It was a blessing and a curse. Maybe that’s why he knew when to stay, or when to run. He had to have that keen sense to do what he did, but so many times he wished he wasn’t so fucking good at it.
After putting the pitcher in a bucket of ice, Avery turned her head and met his gaze. Lucas smiled, but she didn’t return the gesture.
All he came here to do was keep an eye on things for awhile. Avery was a sweet distraction, with her deep green eyes and the way she lit up the stage. No matter how hard he tried, Lucas couldn’t forget last night. His reaction to her voice and everything she said. In some ways, Avery was just like him. The only difference was that Avery didn’t appear to carry the burden of her past on her shoulders, as Lucas did with his. As for himself, it could have been worse, but Lucas still couldn’t find that release switch.
Good thing he was sitting down, because he had a raging hard-on. What the hell? What was it about the woman that he wanted so badly? She seemed to bring out the agitated side in him, that one where he felt like he needed to push the big red hot button like he’d been doing. Maybe he wanted to get to her the way she was getting to him. Whatever the case was, the straining in his jeans didn’t ease up a bit. Son of a bitch. Maybe he needed to see what his chances were with her and get it over with. Once would be enough. He’d have to make sure of it. He didn’t need any sexual energy clouding his judgment. Oh wait ... too late for that.
Screwed! He was screwed.
Baby Stetson (Love and Music in Texas #1) Page 2