They kept hurting me through the night. It felt like hours had passed. I was almost dead. I could no longer move or fight back. Life so slowly ebbing away. I could feel the chill hand of death and I welcomed the sweet release. I felt something at my throat and I could no longer breath. I was being choked, as the men stood around me, I could feel my life leaving me. My last thought was of my family. I tried to focus on them, their faces and I knew any second I would be gone. I desperately wanted someone to revive me. To bring me back to life.
Suddenly it was quiet and I was alone. Alone somewhere. I smelled the sweet smell of death and the pungent odor of decay. I heard the beautiful sound of the Cicadas. I felt the cool drops of rain on my skin. The scent was so beautiful. The steady sound of the rain landing on the ground was soothing in an odd way. It took me back to yesterday. I closed my eye slowly. I do not remember how long I lay there. Each time death beckoning me. It was getting harder to open my eye, harder to breather. I just wanted to succumb to that beautiful eternal sleep.
I heard death whisper in my ear, he asked me if I wanted to live. I thought I was dreaming. This is death. There was no bright light. No Saint Peter at the Pearly gates. The delicious scent that came off his breath made it hard for me to focus. I was dying, slowly, painfully. I thought about Axel and my children. They needed me and I needed them. This thought sealed my fate.
I slowly shook my head and looked at him and with tears in my eyes I whispered “help me?” I did not know if he heard my plea. I wanted to live and be there for mine. I needed help and did not know if my voice would be heard. My throat ached and my tongue felt dry. My entire being suffered from the pain. Death had not yet closed in on me. Unconsciousness overcame me and I knew no more.
At the time I had no idea what it was I requested. I felt him gently wrap me into his arms and he gently lifted me up. I was curled against him like a child curled against his mother. His skin was so smooth and cool against mine. Yet something was wrong. His skin did not feel soft. It felt as hard and smooth as marble. At this point I did not care. I just wanted to get away from the pain of my broken body.
I laid my head to rest against his chest. The scent emanating off of his body was deliciously sweet. In an instant we were off, flying through the night. I could feel the cool air as we made our way. It was almost over. Death was whisking me away, away from the pain of my broken body. I curled up in my mind far away from the pain. I gave in to death.
Death lay me down gently on a soft cushion and suddenly I felt a burning in my neck. I was too weak to fight anymore. The burning in my neck lasted seconds and suddenly I felt something smooth and cool at my lips.
Water? I thought. I could feel my parched throat and cracked lips. I was grateful for the cool nourishment, but I knew no amount of water could save my life. My end was near. I could no longer speak my throat was swollen, every breath I drew in caused me more pain. The darkness was closing in on me. I wanted to give into that eternal slumber but death would not allow me to join him. I wanted to run away from the pain, but run where? There was no way for me to physical run away from my pain. I had to accept the pain and hope for death to end my torture.
Suddenly I tasted something warm, salty, and metallic. I did not have the strength to turn away from the drink. This was not water that ran down my swollen parched throat. It did nothing for me. It did not ease my dry mouth. I could not turn my head away from the cool chalice. With great difficulty and pain I drank until my eye fluttered and closed. I must have finally succumbed to death’s cool embrace.
I could not tell you when it was that I awoke. It could have been minutes, hours, or days later I did not know. What I did know was that on some universal plane all time seemed to stop and slow simultaneously. My eyes continued to flutter and I was in and out of consciousness. I walked the fine line between life and death. My heart was slowing. My breathing became more difficult and labored.
In my unconscious mind, I remembered the day Jazz was born. She was so tiny and pink. I remembered the loud cry she gave. I remembered the love that poured out of my heart for her. I remembered the day Max was born. It was the scariest thing I had ever seen. I was filled with dread that day. Max was so quiet and blue. He had no heartbeat; no sign of life. I remembered that wretched cry I gave when the doctors said there was nothing more they could do for him. As I held him in my arms crying, I felt a small movement and a soft whimper, that escaped his soft newborn lips. I could no longer distinguish whether these were my memories or dreams?
Suddenly I was aware of a burning pain. I could not tell if I was burning from the inside out or vice versa. The burning intensified, steadily growing almost like the way I would imagine a wildfire would spread. My whole body was on fire and I felt paralyzed. I could not move away from the fire. I needed water to put the fire out. I remembered hearing that if you are on fire you needed to stop, drop and roll. Only I could do neither.
“Had these monsters set me on fire?” I thought to myself. Was I still in the unknown place on fire. Had I only imagined the beautiful angel. I could no longer tell the difference between life and death, reality and the dreamlike state I found myself in. Unaware that I was yelling in agony. I did not know how I gathered up the strength to release that wretched scream. Something was horribly wrong with me and suddenly I became aware I was definitely on fire. This is hell. I yelled to be extinguished. I could not move my arms. I could not get up. I was bound to my pain.
This beautiful angel near me held me in his arms. He cradled me the way a parent cradles a child to comfort them. He was repeatedly apologizing to me for the agony I was in. I screamed again and again. I begged him to end my life. His cool arms did nothing to ease my burning body. I screamed until I could scream no more. Suddenly the fire intensified, my chest exploded over and over, and still he held me. He told me it was almost over and to focus on him.
I looked at his angelic face, it was stained red as though he was crying tears of blood. I was confused. Why would someone be crying blood. I pushed this thought aside Slowly I began to relax and I withdrew into my mind again. I could still feel the burning of my body. I felt him begin to clean me up. I heard him say he did not want me to see myself as I was. He lifted me and changed my clothes in one fluid motion. I felt the cool satin slide down my body.
I went rigid when I could no longer contain the pain. From my chest it finally exploded into the rest of my body. The fire intensifying slowly and then withdrawing, this must be the end. I begged this sweet angel of death to grant me mercy and his gentle words to sooth me could not sooth the burning fire within. I was dying and I wanted to welcome it, embrace it. But it would not end. I felt my ribs snap back into place. My throat no longer felt swollen. I could easily move my fingers. I was amazed they were no longer broken. I opened both of my eyes. They were no longer swollen shut. I felt a different kind of sensation now. I could feel the room with every breath I drew. I could smell the scent of old books, The soft down from somewhere in the room. My senses were overwhelmed. I was beyond confused.
The agony continued. I no longer screamed. I realized that screaming did no good. Nothing eased the burning pain. It seemed as though time stood still. I no longer counted the seconds that passed. Ironically, in the distance I heard the silent ticking of an old clock somewhere. I heard the gentle tapping of the rain on the roof. I focused on that gentle tapping as the rain has always been a balm for me. As I rode the waves of pain, I remembered the pain of child birth and found it comparable. The only difference was that this has gone on for what seemed like an eternity. I did not want to believe this was my hell. I longed for relief and I knew my angel would not grant it. I wondered who I angered in a previous life to deserve such torture.
Quite suddenly, with my senses being heightened, I saw that my angel sat by me, holding my hand in his. I could hear him talking about me and the new life I had been given. He told me the pain would not last much longer. He could feel me begin to relax and accept the pain. When he caressed my
face it was warm and soft. It felt like a gentle caress I felt his skin so smooth, so soft, but it was no longer cool or hard. His skin was warm against my own. I was confused by this when just before his skin was cold as ice.
He explained to me what I was becoming. I knew I must surely be in hell, creatures such as him are only a figment of our imagination, a myth. I focused more on his face and his face was becoming clearer. He had a soft square jaw. His face was contorted in anguish. I could hear the faint accent as he spoke to me. I could hear the voices outside these walls of wherever I was. I could faintly hear his thoughts, what he said was true.
How can this be? I thought to myself. Suddenly myth had become reality. Legend had become fact. No this was not real. This was all in my head. I was damned to hell for all eternity. This was my death, my end.
The pain was over. I looked at him and in fear jumped away from him. I found myself on the other side of the room in the same instant I thought it. He approached me slowly, cautiously. I did not know this man. I did not know if he was friend or foe.
I looked at him cautiously, afraid he would hurt me the way those men did. When I thought about that I could not remember their faces clearly. He held out his hand to me and still I stayed away from him. In another second I was on the other side of the room, near a beautiful French door. I could see the tattoos on his muscled arms. They looked intricate. He had more tattoos on his hand and on the side of his neck. These were not modern tattoos, that much I was sure of.
I could smell his sweet scent. This was no cologne, his scent was sweeter, and lovelier if that could be possible. I could smell another smell distinct from his, the smell of morning rain and honeysuckle. Maybe a hint of jessamine. My perfume Amore Eterno has jessamine notes in it, but not the honeysuckle, I heard him inhale and hold his breath. I did not expect what came next.
He smiled at me.
“This must be very disorientating to you,” he began,” but don’t be afraid. I saved you from certain death.” I saw his tall figure slowly approach me. His hands held out with his palms up. I was unsure of my own thoughts. Naturally, I was very confused about what occurred.
The way he spoke was odd. He spoke English with a foreign accent that was very subtle. It sounded Slovakian or maybe Romanian. It was definitely European. I just could not place it. It was difficult to tell since you had to really listen to him speak in order to detect it.
“You do smell delicious. I have never noticed one of our kind, with such a beautiful scent,” he said.
Had he just complemented me about the way I smell? I asked myself. I was not sure if this was a good thing or a bad thing. I was lost by what he just said. This total stranger just said my scent was the most delicious he had ever smelled on one of our kind. His words to me sound so foreign like I was having a very difficult time comprehending what he was saying.
Our kind. How very unfamiliar? I thought. I was just as confused, uncertain of the meaning. I could see the dust bunnies floating in the air around me. I could smell the magnolias outside from somewhere. I could smell the different aromas in the air and I could easily identify them.
I heard the whispered word “Magnifico,” break through my thoughts. For a split second, I had thought I was alone with my thoughts. I jumped up again at the sound and instantly found myself curled up in the corner of the room, so fast I had not realized I moved. I heard laughter, someone clapping. For some unknown reason I felt a slight fear deep inside of me. I felt the need to survive. Maybe it was because the recent memory of my death.
“My little one you are perfection, come see.”
I hesitated before I approached him. He had his hand held out to me. So quickly, my hand was in his. I looked at him confused. It was as though both the thought and action worked simultaneously. He turned me to face a mirror on the mantel. The mirror was old, the frame around it looked gilded. I saw a girl in the mirror. I did not recognize her. This girl in the mirror was perfection not a single flaw, except her hair. It could use a brush. The hair took on a more reddish-brown tone. I saw the beautiful satin dusty purple gown that I now wore. To see the girl in the mirror, I was fearful. This was not me. I was not this perfect. He must have felt my emotions. He gently placed a hand on my shoulder and told me I was pure perfection. The girl in the mirror was not a broken body. The girl in the mirror was whole, not a single blemish or bruise.
“What happened to me?” The sound of my own voice shocked me it was melodic. The way I imagine an angel must sound. I recovered quickly and looked to him for explanation.
I cocked my head to the door. I could hear the people talking outside. He looked at me and explained my hearing has become more acute it would take time to distinguish the different voices and sounds. I looked at him in disbelief.
“Your vision will be improved, as well. You will be more attractive to your prey. Your scent is like jessamine and lavender, or wild flowers in an open field. You will now move more swiftly, much more in which human eyes will never see your approach. There is much more for you to learn and you will have an eternity to learn. However, there is one thing you must always remember,” he explained.
“And that is…?” I interrupted.
“That is secrecy. You cannot ever reveal yourself to anyone and you cannot go near your family. It is our ultimate law,” he finished telling me.
“You mean my family will never know what has happened to me?” I questioned.
“Unfortunately you can never see them again,” he told me. I could hear the sadness in his voice.
“I have to see them. I have to let them know I am alive. I cannot leave them this way, never knowing what has happened to me,” I begged him. I could feel a warm tear slide down my face. I brushed it off and realized it was blood. I was afraid now. How can this be? I was now crying tears of blood. This was something you hear about in religion and I was not a saint, nor was I special to any God.
“If you love your family, you will stay away from them. You would be a danger to them,” he quietly explained to me. I heard the urgency in his voice. He wanted me to accept this and let it go. I just was not sure if I could do that.
Slowly the realization of what I have now become dawned on me. It was best if I stay away from them. Somehow, deep down, I knew he was right. I just did not know what kind of threat I was to my family. I felt a new burning sensation in my throat. It felt dry, like I was thirsty. I ignored this new sensation for the time being.
4. TITANIUM
“C
OME LET US WALK. I assume you have several questions for me?” he asked.
We walked around what appeared to be an open courtyard. There was a beautiful garden with a fountain in the middle. The fountain had a small pool at the bottom, with lily pads and large orange Koi swimming in it. I could see the bright night sky reflected on the pool. I saw the beauty in this image.
I felt the cool damp Louisiana air on my skin. I could still smell the fresh rain. I looked up at the night it was beautiful and the stars looked like shining gems. I was astounded that I could see it so clearly. I used to wear contact lenses, but now my vision was beyond perfect. It was unnerving. It was as though I was seeing everything for the very first time. I realized I was seeing everything life had to offer for the very first time it was up to me to decide what to do with this new knowledge.
“What happened,” I asked him, my voice unsure of what I was asking.
He explained that a horrible atrocity had befallen me and he saved me in a way in which human doctors could not do. The injuries I had sustained were devastating, life ending. He looked away from me when he described the condition in which he found me. I had been broken and beaten beyond repair. Somehow, I was here, alive in some form. He did mention having a surprise for me. I was not sure what that meant since I did not know him.
To change the subject of conversation I asked him again what I was.
“You are a vampire now,” he answered.
“What exactly does that mean?” I asked. I
mean I know what a vampire is but I want you to explain this to me,”
“To be vampire, means you will be more than human, you will feed on the life’s source of humans,” he began.
“Life’s source,” I interrupted.
“Blood. Your survival depends on sustenance; the way a human depends on food for survival,” he explained. I raised my eyebrow in confusion before he continued. “Times have changed. The media has changed the perceptions of vampires in general. We are no longer feared. It appears society as a whole has become more accepting of our kind, but still we must be we must keep the secret.”
“Does the sun kill us?” I asked.
“No,” he replied.
“What about crucifixes and holy water?” I asked
“No and No. Holy objects have no ill effect over us,” he responded.
“Do we sparkle?” I asked. I had to laugh after the question was out of my mouth. I had seen one too many vampire movies and television shows to know that everyone has a different opinion of what harms a vampire or what a vampire does.
“No we do not sparkle.” I could hear the smile in his voice as he answered. Each word broken up, individually emphasized. Suddenly he let out a loud, rumbling laugh. I could swear an earthquake hit with how loud he laughed.
“Like I had not heard that one,” he tells me.
I doubt anyone has asked you that, since you are a vampire and I doubt you have many friends to begin with.” He looked stunned then laughed some more.
“Am I missing something?” I asked him.
“You are missing the obvious,” he stated.
He explained to me how in today’s world it is necessary to blend in with humans.
“You see; I work amongst humans as a police officer. It helps me when I am hunting. I find my victims through the databases. So to answer your question. I have heard those exact comments, just not directed at me personally,” he clarified.
Evanescere: Origins Page 3