My Heart Will Find Yours

by Linda LaRoque

  Texanna was too numb to speak. She nodded and started toward the creek. She heard him holler, “That water is cold.” But she didn’t care, she wanted out of her blood-stained dress and the stink washed off her body. Without undressing, she walked into the water and sat down. The water reached her neck and felt like heaven.

  Garrett’s voice echoed across the field. “Are you decent? Pa had me bring you some soap, towels, and a blanket.”

  She turned around. “I’m decent.”

  He gaped. “You’re in the water with your clothes on?”

  “Toss me the soap and leave the linens on the rock.” She caught the lilac-scented bar. “Thank you, Garrett. I’ll be in after awhile.” She stripped and scrubbed her hair and body. At last she felt she’d survive.

  The hot air quickly dried her body, so she wrapped the towel around her hair and folded the blanket around her body. Still wearing her tennis shoes, she squished her way back to the house. Royce had coffee boiling on the stove. He and Garrett sat at the table eating a ham sandwich and peaches from a can.

  “I think I’ll lie down for just a minute.”

  Two hours later Royce walked upstairs to the spare room to check on her. She’d dropped the quilt and towel across the chair and crawled under the sheet. The room was hot with the door closed. He opened the transom above it and raised both windows higher. Hopefully, there’d be enough of a breeze to keep her comfortable.

  He wanted her in his bed, but neither wanted to confuse Garrett by seeing them sleeping together. Something needed to be settled between them soon.

  ****

  Texanna woke the next morning feeling refreshed. The smell of coffee drew her downstairs. Royce turned when she entered the room, but didn’t speak. They eyed each other for several moments. Finally, he asked. “Do I need to worry about my life?”

  “Nah, I had it coming.” She walked into his arms.

  He buried his face in her neck. “Thank goodness. I’m sorry you got so sick yesterday. Feel okay now?”

  “Yeah. I’m hungry, but it’ll be a while before I can choke down a piece of sausage.” She shuddered.

  “Let’s hurry and get ready for the picnic. We don’t want to miss Jason in the horse race.”

  After breakfast, Royce fried two chickens while she made biscuits and another apple pie. With a recipe from the cookbook, she made potato salad, and then filled large jars with sweet tea.

  As soon as the food basket was packed, she ran upstairs to change clothes. At the back of the chifforobe she located a yellow gingham dress. The sleeves were short, and though fitted at the bodice, it wasn’t confining. Her tennis shoes weren’t dry so she found a pair of Pearl’s button-up shoes. She knew they required a hook but couldn’t find it, so stomped around in them flopping around her ankles. They pinched like the devil but would have to do.

  Just before she left the room, she remembered the locket. It wasn’t on top of the dresser where she’d left it last time she’d worn it. Panic washed over her, making her gasp for breath. It had to be here somewhere, it had to. She yanked open drawers and tossed items on the bed in her frantic search. The blue dress, maybe it had caught on something inside. Searching inside the chifforobe, she located the blue dress, threw it across the bed, and checked every fold.

  Resigned, horror clouding her brain, she sat down on the bed and sobbed.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Unable to contain her misery, she called, “Royce, Royce!”

  He bounded up the stairs and rushed through the door. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Hands on her shoulders, he looked her up and down.

  “The locket, Pearl’s locket is gone. I’ve looked everywhere and can’t find it.” How could she have lost it? That it was her trip back home wasn’t as important anymore, but it was hers and held a great deal of sentimental value for her as well as Royce.

  “Lord have mercy, woman. I thought you were hurt.”

  “You don’t know how important the locket is to me. It’s my tie to Pearl. It’s also my ticket home, the key to time-travel.”

  His face hardened. “I thought there was something between us, Texanna—something permanent. Do you still intend to return to your time?”

  She threw her arms around his neck, and his arms wrapped around her waist. “No, love, I’ve been battling with my conscience and have decided to stay. I love you and Garrett.”

  He groaned and pulled her closer. “Thank God. I want a life with you, Texanna, to have babies and grow old together.”

  “I want that too, but I worry about my father, what he’ll think if I don’t come back.” It was terrible to have to choose between her father or Royce and Garrett. In her heart she believed her daddy would be happy for her if he knew, but he’d suffer not knowing her fate. Right now, she wanted the locket back. “I have to find the locket. I feel incomplete without it.”

  “When was the last time you wore it?”

  She thought back. “Sunday at church. I specifically remember putting it on.” She’d been so anxious to get out of that damn corset she’d forgotten all about the locket. It hadn’t been around her neck when she’d changed clothes. “I must have lost it at church or at the restaurant.” It could be lying in the churchyard, or maybe Maybell found it and was holding it, not knowing who it belonged to.

  “We’ll find it. It’s easily identifiable with your initials and Garrett’s picture.”

  Texanna nodded in misery. Losing the heirloom hung over her like a dark cloud.

  Royce cupped her cheek. “Come on. Let’s get those shoes buttoned and on the road. Don’t let this spoil your day. The locket will turn up.”

  ****

  That evening, with Garrett sound asleep from the exciting July Fourth festivities, Texanna lay with her head on Royce’s shoulder, one leg thrown across his thigh. He stroked her arm enjoying the softness of her skin. She twirled her fingers in the hair on his chest. Royce pushed up to his elbow to study her. His heart thumped. Damned if he wasn’t nervous.

  “I have something I want to show you.” Her brow furrowed with questions. He tapped her nose. “Just a minute. I’ll be right back.”

  He ran downstairs to the pile of clothes he’d dropped on the kitchen floor and fished in his pants pocket for the small box. Texanna was sitting up in bed, arms wrapped around her raised knees, when he returned to the bedroom. He sat at her feet and cleared his throat.

  “I love you, Texanna. I want us to be married. I know it’s awkward to ask Brother Riley to marry us, but…”

  “We could tell him we want to renew our vows. It’s a growing custom in the twenty-first century, and since Pearl was gone so long, and I don’t remember my prior life, maybe he’ll see our reasoning.”

  “That sounds perfect.”

  He opened the box and showed her the two gold bands inside, one delicate, one bolder, less fragile. “I want us to have new rings for a new beginning.”

  She reached out and stroked his face. “Oh, Royce, nothing would make me happier than to be your wife.” He didn’t realize he’d been holding his breath until it left him with a whoosh. He pulled Texanna to him and pressed her face to his chest.

  “Sweetheart, you’ve made me a happy man.” He kissed her forehead. “I’ll talk to Brother Riley tomorrow and see if he can marry us after the services Sunday.”

  ****

  Texanna looked at the jars and jars of apricot jelly they’d put up that day. She’d never been so tired in her entire life. Well, maybe not as tired as when she and Royce had done the wash, or after the hog butchering. But, the physical work along with the stress of refereeing the two older women sapped her. Not only had they washed and scalded what seemed to be thousands of jars, but Aggie and Edna had also snipped at each other all day. Between the two, Texanna doubted the jam would be fit to eat. One said to do one thing, the other, something else.

  At lunchtime she fell gratefully into a chair to eat the fried chicken she’d put in the larder yesterday. With it, they had deviled eggs an
d cold biscuits. She chewed slowly, lost in thought, only half listening as Aggie and Edna regaled each other with horror stories of the Civil War.

  Edna snorted. “I still can’t believe those two Dyson boys fought for the Union.” She cast a glance sideways to see if Texanna heard her remark. Texanna froze under the older woman’s gaze, but pretended indifference. Royce and Matthew fought for the Union? At the knowledge, pride surged through her. She was all for being faithful to her southern roots, but when it came to the war, she supported the Union. If they knew her views, they’d call her an abolitionist, especially Edna. The woman didn’t mince words.

  Aggie chided, “Men have to follow their conscience, old woman, even when it’s not a popular decision.”

  “That’s easy for you to say, you didn’t lose your husband and son to the damn Yankees.”

  “No, I lost mine to a liquored-up Johnny Reb too scared to hold his fire until Samuel found his position.” Aggie had tears in her eyes. “Dead is dead regardless of who pulled the trigger.”

  Edna dropped her head and nodded. “You’re right, Aggie. As much as I respect Matthew and Royce, I feel the bitterness rising again sometimes.” She turned to Texanna. “What about you, girl, how’d it feel having your man fight against his southern brothers?”

  Texanna could understand Edna’s bitterness. She hadn’t seen history’s future or had the advantage of the whole picture of the war as they’d been taught in high school. To delay having to answer, she took a long drink of water. “Seems to me, despite which side he fought on, he waged war on his countrymen.” She shrugged. “Anyway, Royce has never told me about his part in the war, and I don’t ask him.”

  “But, you lived it girl, surely you have your opinions. You were just, what, twelve-years-old when the war broke out?”

  Yes, Pearl had been twelve, but she’d never expressed her views to Texanna. Everything Texanna knew about the Civil War she’d learned in history books. Royce would have a fit if she told the women she’d not been born yet. What would they think of the movie Gone With the Wind? She had a good idea these two didn’t know many women like Scarlett O’Hara.

  Aggie noticed her reluctance. “Leave her alone. Can’t you see she doesn’t want to talk about it?”

  Edna sniffed. “Well, excuse me, Aggie. Didn’t mean to ruffle anyone’s feathers.” She smiled at Texanna patronizingly. “Truly, dear, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. In fact, as much as I resented Matthew and Royce fighting for the Union, I admired their courage and determination when they came home.” She shook her head. “Law, I feared that rambunctious little Jason was dead along with his parents, but within a couple days of returning, his brothers found him and two days later, they were back in their family home.”

  “What about Jason?” Somehow she’d never heard anything about Royce’s life before he married Pearl. Why was that?

  “Why, a nasty carpetbagger shot his folks down in front of him, and the boy not more than thirteen-years-old at the time. Would’ve killed him too, but he ran off. Took his Pa’s gun and lived in a cave like a wild animal for three or four months. His brothers knew right where to find him.”

  “But why would the man do that?”

  Aggie looked shocked. “Surely you know how dishonest those men were. Not that we had many here, but one managed to get elected as tax collector and tried to swindle the Dysons out of their farm. Said they owed back taxes, which wasn’t true. When they wouldn’t budge, he shot them down in cold blood.”

  Texanna was stunned. She’d read about such dealings but never knew Royce’s family had been affected. “How’d Royce and Matthew get the farm back?”

  Edna appeared taken aback. “Why, Royce did what that fool who was sheriff should’ve done, he—”

  Aggie shushed her. “That’s for Royce to tell her, not us.”

  They got up from the table and carried their dishes to the sink. Texanna wanted to know more, but at Aggie’s admonishment, Edna’s mouth had shut like a vise.

  “Darn it, at least tell me about Jason. Was he safe and well?” The poor kid all alone. It’s a wonder he didn’t starve.

  “Are you kidding?” Aggie laughed, and Edna joined her. “That tadpole had the time of his life. Hunted for game, stole from folk’s gardens, even snuck in his ma and pa’s house and ran off with all kinds of foodstuff and cartridges for his pa’s gun.”

  “Yeah, put old crook Peters in a real tailspin. Came riding into town bawling to the sheriff about thieves taking enough food to feed an army.” Edna slapped her leg and chortled. “The kid was leaving food on doorsteps all over the county.” She sobered. “Was a blessing to some. Kept them from starving.”

  Texanna laughed with the two women. No wonder Jason was such a risk-taker. He sounded like a regular Robin Hood. It’s a miracle he didn’t try to take more revenge on Peters. Her laughter died and she had to ask. “Did he ever try to shoot his folk’s killer?”

  Aggie nodded. “Oh, he fired a shot or two into the house, shots barely missing Peters. But, even at thirteen, if Jason had wanted to kill him, he would’ve. He knew his brothers would take care of it when they got home.”

  They spent the remainder of the afternoon filling the rest of the jars with hot apricot jam. The ladies chatted as they worked, having bonded talking about the war, but when she let it slip about the wedding on Sunday, an argument broke out over who would bake the wedding cake. After a heated discussion, Edna conceded to let Aggie bake the cake, and she would provide the punch and table decorations.

  Thankfully, by the time Edna got in her buggy to leave, jars of cooled jelly were lined up on shelves in the larder.

  Texanna walked out with Edna and cringed at Aggie’s parting words. “Good riddance you old biddy.” If Edna heard the rude remark, she pretended otherwise and chattered all the way to her buggy. Once there, she stopped and placed a hand on Texanna’s arm.

  “I want you to know, even though he fought for the Union, your husband is well thought of around here. He saved more than one family from that crook Peters, including mine.”

  On impulse, Texanna leaned over and kissed the leathered cheek. “Thank you for telling me.”

  Rather than go back inside and face Aggie, Texanna sat down in one of the rockers on the front porch, leaned back, and closed her eyes. Whew, she didn’t know if she was up to the hard work of life in the nineteenth century. She wondered when frozen food was invented, and electric refrigerators? That’s what she needed. If she never saw another apricot, it’d be too soon.

  She sighed and, with the toe of her tennis shoe, put the rocker in motion. Yes, she was tired, but it was a weariness of achievement. Royce would enjoy the jam—if it was fit to eat. How had she come to this? Wanting to please a man? A grin stretched her face. Well, he certainly pleased her. God, she loved the man and couldn’t imagine not having him in her life.

  Her mood sobered. She’d learned a lot about Royce today. Why hadn’t he told her he’d fought for the Union? Were his nightmares flashbacks from the war or because of what happened when he returned home? She’d heard him thrashing in his sleep several times and wanted to go to him. A feeling of tenderness washed over her. Next time she’d be sleeping beside him. Hopefully, he’d tell her about his bad dreams.

  It was important to make sure Royce was safe. Without the locket, she couldn’t travel back and forth in time trying to change history. Dire methods were necessary. She needed a plan to somehow prevent the bank robbery so there’d be no room for error. What had she read about the Bass gang and their whereabouts before the robbery?

  ****

  “Folks, today is a special day for our church family as Royce Dyson has asked to renew his vows of love with his lovely Texanna before this congregation.” Brother Riley beamed as he spoke from the pulpit. “Now, I’ve never heard of this renewing vows, but I think anytime two people want to pledge their love in God’s house before his children, the Lord is mighty pleased.”

  Applause and chatter rippled through
the room. The preacher raised his hand for quiet. “This morning’s service will be short to allow time for the ceremony. Our church ladies have prepared a special reception for the couple immediately following.”

  Texanna heard his words from her position in the small room at the front of the church. She inhaled the sweet fragrance of the white roses and baby’s breath in her bridal bouquet as Molly straightened the skirt of the ivory satin and lace gown Pearl wore on her wedding day. If only she had the locket.

  “You look lovely, Texanna.” Molly’s eyes were full of tears. She took Texanna’s hands. “You’ve made Royce so happy. I hope you’re as delighted as he is.”

  “I am, Molly, happier than I can ever express.”

  Sally poked her head in the door. “They’re ready.” Molly hugged Texanna and rushed to the door. Garrett slipped in as she exited.

  Texanna was terrified. After all, a girl didn’t get married every day and especially in a previous century. But she was marrying Royce—he was a special man and these were unique circumstances. She loved him with a passion, one that would never die. To think she’d almost settled for something less in a marriage horrified her.

  Royce’s heart beat so hard he thought it would jump out of his chest and run down the aisle to Texanna. This beautiful woman was actually marrying him, and Pearl’s son escorted her down the aisle. Garrett took Texanna’s hand and placed it in his father’s then moved to stand beside Jason. Royce’s eyes locked with Texanna’s. He kissed her hand, placed it on his arm, and drew her closely to his side.

  “Dearly beloved, we’re gathered here to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony.” Royce repeated his vows without lifting his gaze from Texanna’s. Her lips trembled as she spoke hers, but her voice was clear and unfaltering. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. Royce, you may kiss your bride.”

  He didn’t need to be told twice. He raised Texanna’s veil and smiled, his heart in his throat. “Hello, wife,” he whispered against her lips. He’d meant the kiss to be short and sweet, but as their lips touched, it deepened. His lips plundered hers. At the sounds of laughter, whistles, and applause, they broke apart. Royce whooped with joy and looked down into his wife’s radiant face. She blushed, but her giggles blended with his laughter.