by Leslie Chase
"My father didn't want to abandon the King, but he was scared that I'd get caught in more violence if I was your friend," she continued. It was hard to get the words out, but she knew that if she didn't speak now she might never gather the courage. "That's why I never answered your letters, Mattias. And why I'm quitting my job here as soon as there's a new king on the throne. I can't stay. I shouldn't have stayed this long."
The tension in him was palpable, she could see the conflicting emotions warring in his eyes. Anger and sympathy and pain and determination. Mattias practically trembled with the feelings filling him, and Sophie had to fight the urge to rush to his side, to hold him and forget her promise.
Ironic, she thought, the ghost of a smile on her lips. He's fighting the same urge, I think. He wants to run to me and comfort me, but he can't do that and respect my wishes.
A part of her, a strong part, hoped he'd give into the temptation and ignore her words. But, of course, he didn't — he wasn't like Captain Praetor. Mattias was a good man. Maybe too good.
Instead, he backed away from the table, giving her space to breathe. Sophie relaxed slightly, relieved and somewhat disappointed.
"If you wanted to avoid being close to me and my brothers, you picked the wrong job," he said, and there was a touch of humor in his voice. It was about as strong as her smile, but it was there.
"I know," Sophie said, shaking her head. "But what could I do? Father taught me everything about the job, there wasn't anyone more qualified when he took ill. I was practically drafted to take over. There was supposed to be a replacement for me, someone I'd train up to the job, but that didn't happen before the King got sick, and then there was no time."
"Your father's ill?" Mattias said, concern in his voice. "I'm sorry, I didn't know. I thought he'd just retired."
"He should have just retired years ago, but he was stubborn. If he'd listened to the doctors... but no, he kept on working until his heart nearly gave out. He's fine now, as long as he doesn't overdo things, but he had to get away from the castle. Here, he'd just keep on trying to do the work anyway. It was impossible to keep him out of the office until Mom made him buy a farm in the country and head out there."
She shook her head, her fond exasperation showing.
"I remember how hard he worked when we were kids. That sounds just like him," Mattias said, a smile tugging at his oh-so-kissable lips. Stop that, Sophie told herself, tearing her eyes away from him and blushing. A moment's distraction from the problem didn't seem to have helped her keep her thoughts off Mattias.
Closing her eyes, she borrowed strength from the memory of her father and the promise she'd made to him.
"Mattias, we can't be mates. It doesn't matter what you think, what I think. I've made a promise and it would break my father's heart if I broke it."
Mattias couldn't believe what she was saying. But he also knew that Sophie was telling the truth as she saw it. It was hard to argue the point — what could he say to that kind of promise? Of course she wanted to honor her father and keep him safe.
His lion knew what to do, or at least it thought it did. He could feel the urges it sent him, telling him to sweep her off her feet, to kiss her, to take her. To claim her and make her his. From the way she'd reacted to his touch, he knew that if he did that, she'd be carried along by her own feelings for him.
No, I'm not going to violate her trust like that, he told his lion firmly. The animal part of his soul didn't understand promises, didn't understand mistakes. It just knew that she was meant for him, and he for her. The human part of him, though, knew better. I will have her, and soon. No one else will do. But I can afford to be patient since we're meant for each other. There will be a solution to this.
"I'm not going to push you to break a promise, Sophie," he said aloud. "Especially not to your father."
Across the room, he saw Sophie relax, tension draining from her as though a dam had opened. The look of relief on her face was tinged with a regret, but the fear and stress left her and the smile she gave him, small and trembling as it was, showed real gratitude.
Before she could speak, he held up a hand.
"That doesn't mean that I'm giving up on you," he said. "Or on us. If fate has chosen us to be together, then we will, and you know that as well as I do. But you've made a promise, and I respect that."
"Thank you, Matt," she said, "I was worried you'd... well, not everyone would take a no that well."
There was something in the way she said that which made him frown, something that hinted at a bad experience. If someone's hurt her, then he'll pay, Mattias promised himself. Whether we're together or not, no one is going to get away with doing her wrong!
Before he could ask her about it, though, she moved on. Picking up the file from the table she held it up and looked him in the eye.
"You still need to find a mate, though," she said, her professional mask slipping back across her features. "And no arguments this time, Matt! You have to go to the Well of Fate with her to see if you're the next chosen king."
"I know who my mate is," Mattias said. Seeing a flash of pain in her eyes, he held up his hands and shook his head. "Okay, fine. No arguments. If you want me to try your list, then I will."
"Maybe you'll feel the same way about one of them," she said, an odd mixture of hope and fear in her voice. "I mean, I was the first woman you met in Leotania. Prince Roman met Anna on his way back to the country. Maybe it's just that you lion shifters are—"
"Really easy?" Mattias interrupted, grinning to show he was joking. Turning her idea around in his mind, he made himself consider it carefully. True, the lion shifters of Leotania would find their mates before they went to the Well of Fate, and that had always worked out. It would be simpler to think that it was just because they felt fated to mate with whatever woman they met. He couldn't rule it out, but still, he knew in his heart that she was wrong.
What he felt for her couldn't be explained as simply as that. It wasn't a desire for just any mate, it was a desire for Sophie. He could scarcely think about anything else, let alone anyone else. More importantly, Sophie felt the same way for him. They were meant for each other, Mattias was certain, in a way that no one else could match.
The trick would be to show her that truth. If she insisted on him seeing these other women, maybe that was the answer. If he met them and it didn't work, would that be enough to convince Sophie? It was worth a try.
"Okay," he told her. "Fine, I'll give it a go. As long as that's what you want."
"It is," she said with a certainty which didn't reach her eyes. But she didn't let the conflict inside stop her, and Mattias had to admire that stubbornness. The commitment to her goals was admirable, especially when it was so hard for her. He just wished that she hadn't committed to this.
Mattias looked at the folder with a sinking feeling. He couldn't face sorting through them, not right away. The shift was too quick. If he looked at them now, without working out some of his emotions first, he'd end up doing something he regretted.
"I'm going to need some time to get used to this idea," he told Sophie. "At least a few hours. And I want you to think about this. Make sure it's what you want, too. If you're sure, then we can meet this afternoon and go over your choices."
She nodded, picking up the folder again and looking determined. "We'll do that, Matt. My mind is made up. This afternoon, we're going to settle this."
With that she turned and retreated. Mattias watched her go, a pain in his heart, and hoped that they would be able to find their way past this. Somehow.
7
Leaving Mattias's rooms, Sophie had to fight back an urge to cry. It wasn't easy to push the man she liked so much off onto another woman, but she didn't have a choice. Yes, you do, a nagging part of her soul insisted. You always have a choice. He'd help you find it if you let him.
"Shut up," she muttered under her breath. "I've made my decision, and I'm not going to talk myself out of it."
Grimacing, she pa
used to try and center herself. Now I'm talking to myself. That's a great sign. Not.
Back at her office she had plenty of work to do, endless paperwork to lose herself in. And that was the best thing for her in a mood like this. Work had always given her something to hide her feelings in. Striding back to her office, she turned her mind to anything but Prince Mattias and how he made her feel.
For hours, she lost herself entirely in the piles of decisions to be made. Most of them were things that couldn't be settled until there was a king on the throne to make the final decision. All she could do was delay things, keep the problems from getting worse during the wait. Finding enough money to keep one project or another from collapsing until someone was actually in charge.
It was complicated, satisfying work, the kind of thing she knew she'd miss when she retired. The things that her father already did miss. It was tempting to call him for advice, but she knew that she couldn't risk it. If he got interested in a problem there'd be no stopping him from coming back and taking over.
Eventually, she realized that she was hungry, and looked up to find that it was past two in the afternoon. Well past time to break for lunch. With a reluctant sigh, she pushed herself away from her desk and went to eat, trying to keep her mind on her work and off the Prince.
The kitchens kept a spread of food available for the castle staff throughout the day. It was one of the better perks of working for royalty; no matter the time of the day or night, there was always something tasty to eat in the staff canteen.
The room was nearly empty as she entered — there were fewer staff present in the absence of a king, and those who were there mostly ate earlier. That suited Sophie fine at the moment, since she didn't really want to talk to anyone. But as she collected a selection of cold meat and fresh bread, Captain Praetor entered behind her.
Suddenly she found herself wishing that the room was full of people to talk to, that she could sit at a table too full for him to join her. But no such luck. Even as she took her seat, the last of the other eaters finished their meals and left in a hurry, and she was alone with the man.
"I see you've been working too hard to eat," he said, joining her at a table.
"What do you want, Karl?" she asked. He clearly wasn't there for a meal; all he'd grabbed from the counter was an apple, and he was turning it over in his hands rather than biting into it.
He had to have come looking for her. But how would he have known where to find her, and when? The idea that the head of the castle's security was using that position to track her was not a pleasant one.
"I came here to have a private conversation with you, Sophie. We really need to talk about a few things," he said lightly. She was about to object that this wasn't really a private area when she saw that two of his guards stood at the door, blocking access to anyone else. If the security service wants a room to be private, I guess it is, she thought. But why not my office? What's he worried about there?
When she didn't answer him aloud, Praetor grinned and continued. "I can see that you've set yourself a higher target than me, and I want you to know that I don't blame you. Catching a prince, maybe even the next king? That's thinking big. I admire that in you."
Sophie frowned, wanting to interrupt, to tell him he was completely wrong. If anything, the opposite was true, but she doubted that he'd believe that, and she was morbidly curious to hear where he was going with his thoughts.
"The thing is, Sophie, I have big plans too. Even bigger than that, and I can't have you getting in my way. There's no reason we can't work together, though," he said, looking her in the eyes. There was a warning there, and greed. So much greed and ambition it threatened to drown out everything else as she looked into him. It felt as though she was falling into a dark pit as she locked gazes with him.
"What do you have in mind?" she asked, trying not to set him off. She didn't know what to think, but she could see that he was dangerous. And that there was something he wanted to tell her.
"The way I see it, we've got Leotania in our palms," Praetor said, smirking and reaching out to take her hand. "Mattias, Gabriel, Roman — none of them are like their grandfather. They don't know how things are done. Between the two of us, we could show them. You manage their appointments, I manage their security, and together we could have them only see what we want them to. We'd have complete control of the country."
Sophie blinked at that, taken aback by his audacity. He wasn't wrong — if they worked together, they could control almost everything about the life of the new king, and that would be pretty much the same as having the throne itself. Bold as it was, it might work if they could keep the King from speaking to anyone outside their control.
"But what about the brothers?" she asked, curious despite herself. "The other princes would talk to the King, he'd find out things that way. Your plan won't take care of itself."
"That's the beauty of it, Sophie. We can spin things so that the King trusts us more than his brothers. Especially if he thinks that you're his mate: who do you think King Mattias would believe, you or them? And you'd be backed up by a security assessment pointing out the troubling connections they've made..."
Praetor's grin was shark like, enough to make Sophie shiver. That might actually work, horrible as it sounded. Probably not; Mattias and Roman seemed to get on well enough that it would be hard to drive a wedge between them. But she couldn't say that it would be impossible.
"You're assuming that Mattias is going to be chosen," she pointed out, playing for time to think more than anything. Praetor just shrugged.
"Fifty-fifty chance, the same as you're playing. If it's not him, it'll be Gabriel, and that's a bit harder to manage, but we'd make it work. I know there's nothing that could stop us if we try, babe."
It took a lot of effort to not let her disgust show on her face, but now that Praetor was talking about this openly, Sophie knew she couldn't risk that. He was a powerful man, and the Royal Security Service were the only armed force in the castle. If he wanted to do her harm, then there was nothing she could do to stop him. So she kept herself steady and calm and let him speak.
"You and me, babe," he said. "We can run the whole country. We get to be together, and you can still be queen. What do you say?"
"I don't want to be queen," she said, trying to keep her voice steady. "I'm trying to set him up with someone else, and then I'll retire."
"Oh, I know all about that little bluff of yours," he said, eyes twinkling. "Don't think that security doesn't have the Prince's rooms under surveillance. He'll look at the other women, and come back to you. You know that as well as I do. Hell, even Mattias knows that, he said as much."
Sophie's blood ran cold at the knowledge that Praetor had been listening in. She'd known that he was dangerous, and this conversation proved that he was even worse than she'd feared. But that he was spying on the royal rooms of the castle — that was something she wouldn't have believed. She felt herself pale and tried to keep her calm and poise.
"I'm serious, Karl. Mattias will find someone else, and then I'll be gone. I don't want to be around the castle anymore."
I don't want to be around you anymore, she meant. It didn't seem like a great idea to say it out loud, though. Antagonizing Praetor was an awful idea, at least while she was alone with him. For a moment she considered pretending to play along, to let him think she was on his side, but it was too repulsive an idea. Not only was she unsure she'd be able to pull off the deception, but it was all too likely that he'd expect her to prove it.
Which, given his interest in her, would likely mean taking her to bed. And that was too awful to contemplate. She didn't need to convince him that she was an ally anyway, as long as he wasn't too concerned about her betraying him. All she needed to do was get out of this conversation and tell Mattias about Praetor's plan, and he could take care of the problem.
His eyes were keen as he looked into her, and she could see the cold, mean intelligence in them. After a moment, he smiled wider and
sat back.
"Alright," he said quietly. "Maybe you do mean that. Not what I'd expected, but I can work with it. If you want out of your job, I don't mind that. It won't keep us from being together, after all."
A spark of hope flared in Sophie's heart, and she quickly suppressed it. She didn't want to show anything to those too-perceptive eyes.
"However, there is something I will need you to do," he added. "If you're not going to be Chief Secretary, you will need to give my choice of replacement the job. That should be easy enough. Traditionally you pick your own replacement, after all and I don't think that any of the princes are going to have a candidate they prefer."
Sophie nodded. That was true enough. She expected her recommendation to get the job. And whoever Praetor picked would be someone who shouldn't get the job, so knowing who was in his pocket would help.
"Good," he said. Leaning in, he fixed her with a careful stare, and deep in his eyes a danger burned. Sophie couldn't help leaning backward, her breath catching, instinct telling her to get away from the dangerous predator in front of her. "One more thing. I know that you're smart, too smart to think about trying to stand against me and my plan. That's why I can let you go safely. But I need to be sure, you understand. And so I'll be clear. I know where your family lives, Sophie. Your mother and father, on their little farm near Gerrenbad. It's a nice place, but so isolated. Anything could happen to them out there. So if you decide to try and cut me out, if you betray me, if it turns out that you've lied to me, it won't just be you that suffers."
He reached out to grip her face, fingers digging into her cheeks as he held her roughly. "Do you understand me, Sophie?"
She tried to nod, but his grip was too tight. Praetor's grin widened, teeth showing, and she could see that he was enjoying her fear and discomfort. If she'd needed another reason not to want to be with him, that would have done it.
"Say it, Sophie. You have to say it."
"I understand," she said, words unclear through his tight grip. He held her a moment longer, weighing her response, and then released her.