by Shannon Lamb
Her breath suddenly caught in her throat when Alex gently rested his hand on her side. He held it firmly in place, as if waiting for permission or fair warning. He softly massaged the slope of her back with his thumb, leisurely sliding his hand forward over the curve of her stomach.
“If you recall, I said no funny business,” Marie reminded him playfully, sounding more flirtatious than she’d intended.
“Please don’t misunderstand. I’m trying to comfort you.” The hitch in his breathing told her otherwise. “Would you like me to stop?” His fingers stilled, no longer grazing her naval.
“No,” she answered meekly, pushing herself back against his chest. He smelled strangely warm, like hickory smoke and cloves, baking in the summer sun.
“I know you’re scared. I can sense it, not that it’s hard to see,” he sighed. “Were you at least able to relax at the hot springs?”
Panicked thoughts came rushing back with an image of her hazy reflection, now branded in her memory. She shot straight up with a sharp gasp.
“My face!” she squealed, suddenly remembering the reason she’d rushed back to camp. “My face and hair are different! Surely, you’ve noticed? Since you don’t seem the slightest bit fazed, I’m assuming you know why,” she attempted to keep the urgency out of her tone, but anxiety flooded her delicate features, giving her away.
“It’s nothing to be afraid of,” he reassured her with a laugh. “That’s how you’re supposed to look.”
“Elaborate.”
“Genes aren’t nearly as sporadic here as they are on Earth. Anyone with enough worth can determine how their child will look before they’re born. It’s the reason royals are renowned for their beauty. It’s guaranteed.” That didn’t sit right with Marie. A parent shouldn’t put so much stress on physical appearance. A parent should let nature take its course and love their child unconditionally, no matter what they look like.
“I understand the concept, but what does that have to do with me? This wasn’t the face I was born with.”
“Actually, it is. Your real father placed an Inpei on you. An Inpei is a weak concealment spell of sorts. They’re nullified by preset triggers. In your case, it was cast to tarnish your natural beauty, to assure that you’d stay hidden. Human babies often change hair and eye color as they develop, so your surrogate parents didn’t think anything of it when you’d changed, but in truth, it was the Inpei taking effect. The spell wore off when you were reunited with me, your protector.”
Marie had no idea what she’d looked like as a baby, because her father – and she used that term loosely, now more than ever – had burned all of her pictures in a drunken stupor. That was just one of many wonderful memories she had of her childhood.
There was no way to verify what Alex was saying, but there was nothing to discredit it, either. She’d trusted him enough to take her this far, and she wasn’t about to stop now. Something inside of her intrinsically bound her to him with blinding devotion. Something she couldn’t explain.
“I meant to warn you, but in all honesty, it slipped my mind. I apologize for my folly,” the sincerity in his voice melted her anger into acquiescence.
“So...this is my face now, huh?” she chuckled, examining a lock of her raven hair.
“It always was. You were always meant to be this beautiful,” Alex raised his arm to touch her face, but recoiled halfway and swiftly turned his back to her.
“Thanks, I guess? Kind of a slap and a hug,” Marie blurted out in anticipation of awkward silence. Her efforts only intensified it. The fact that they were no longer facing each other somehow made it worse.
Marie felt comforted that her new visage didn’t signify the apocalypse; though, considering the current conditions of Quinque, this world might have already been through one. With everything else going on, her looks were the least of her concerns. Still, she couldn’t help but feel self-conscious lying next to Alex.
Being so close to him made her extremely aware of her own body, because it reacted to every movement of his. Each exhalation was a sigh that filled her with warmth, licking her nerves in anticipation of his touch. Every small movement he made tugged at the sheets, unintentionally pulling her just a little bit closer.
Jolts of excitement raced through her body every time his flesh accidentally grazed hers, leaving it sensitive and tingling for more. She felt drawn to the heat of his soft skin, as if there was a magnetic pull. She longed to reach out and touch him, but she kept to herself, tucked into her little corner.
She hadn’t been this nervous around a boy since high school. As much as she missed the butterflies, experience had taught her to fear them. Still, she was thankful for the embarrassing thoughts running rampant through her imagination. Flashes of them tangled in the sheets. Fantasies she’d never admit to. It kept her mind off of tomorrow.
“You’re scared about tomorrow. I can feel you shaking,” Alex blurted out, unable to stand the silence any longer.
So much for being distracted. “The only way I’ve been able to stay sane is by thinking about something else.”
“I can see the appeal, but you have to acknowledge the truth. This time tomorrow, we’ll be in Anthros.”
“You think I don’t know that?” she stiffened, sliding her body further into the corner until her front was uncomfortably flush with the wall.
“What were you thinking about?” Alex sensed her growing agitation and attempted to change the subject.
“Nothing,” she bit out, failing to think about anything except Anthros now.
A sheen of sweat washed over Marie as images of flesh being torn from bone filled her head. The phantom pain that accompanied them caused her to tremble.
Her heart drummed against her ribcage so hard that it repeatedly jerked her forward as the growing tension set fire to her muscles. In one swift motion, Alex slid his arm over her ribcage and flipped her onto her side so she was facing him. It was anything but delicate.
For a brief moment, they locked eyes, sharing a gaze so intensely intimate it made her feel naked. He abruptly severed their connection, casting his eyes to the side as he cupped his hand over the back of her neck and slammed her face into his chest.
She breathed in his bittersweet scent, tasting his heady aroma on the tip of her tongue. The sudden nearness of him brought her unexpected comfort. She stopped resisting his kindness and went limp, crying herself to sleep in his arms.
Marie found herself shrouded in darkness. Instinctively, she knew she was dreaming, but it didn’t ease the icy tendrils of fear wrapping around her heart and seizing her breaths. She shakily clambered forward. The soft, squishy ground made it difficult to find a decent foothold and remain upright.
Every time she attempted to place her foot firmly in front of her, it sank into the ground. The crude disconnect shattered her equilibrium and threw her onto her knees. A feeling of dread washed over her as her hands sliced through the ground. It was as if it were made of water, but it felt thick like molasses, and her struggle only pulled her deeper.
“Is this...quicksand?” She went perfectly still. It was impossible to know. She couldn’t see a thing and she had no idea what quicksand felt like. It wasn’t exactly an issue back in her hometown of Quaker Springs.
Her attempts to stay afloat were futile, and the land swallowed her in mere seconds. Marie pursed her lips and squeezed her eyes shut as the ground closed over the top of her head, burying her in fear. The coppery syrup seeped through the cracks of her lips as it rafted through her nostrils and burned her eyes.
Oh god. This is blood! Marie thrashed wildly as the sudden realization thrust her into fight or flight.
The sharp taste of metal permeated her taste buds as it slid down the back of her throat, filling her lungs like cement and anchoring her to the ground. Her innards burned for air, for relief from the torment of drowning while buried alive, deprived of her most basic need and stripped of her sight.
The ground spit her out onto a hard surface. Th
e abrasive impact sent jolts of pain racing up her spine. She lurched forward, retching. She slapped her clammy hands down on the floor and violently recoiled when the sharp sting of ice stopped her heart cold, freezing the flow of blood as it deflated her lungs.
“How am I not dead?” Marie was no longer so sure she wasn’t. This place was beginning to feel less and less like a dream, and more and more like a waking nightmare.
A spotlight suddenly appeared, illuminating the same silver door she’d seen in her last dream. This time it was flanked by four foreboding silhouettes. Driven by morbid curiosity, Marie dragged herself forward on her hands and knees.
The slight pressure on her joints made her bones feel like jelly. She slammed into the ground repeatedly, buckling beneath the weight of her persistence every time she jerked herself forward. A sudden flash of red light blinded her, bathing her in its warm glow as it penetrated her skin. The intense heat robbed her of her last breaths, and her will to go on.
“Marie!” Alex shook her like a rattle.
He’d been trying to wake her for several minutes, but she wasn’t responding. He knew she was still alive by the beat of his own heart, but something wasn’t right. Her tortured wheeze roused him from a deep slumber, raising the hackles of his inner animal and awakening his primal instinct to protect her.
Marie shot straight up, gasping for air. She clawed at her neck as if something were lodged in her throat. The cool rush of relief burned her lungs in its unfamiliarity, and it took her a moment to acclimate herself with the simple motion of breathing again.
She slowly blinked several times, taking in her surroundings with a newfound appreciation. She’d never been so happy to be alive, or so afraid to go back to sleep.
“Are you alright?” Alex’s heart caught in his throat at the familiar sight of her beautiful blue eyes as they popped open, stealing his breath away.
Marie coughed into her trembling hands, still unable to take a full breath. Did something in the physical realm trigger her nightmare, or was it the other way around? She quickly clasped her hands together after seeing a mottle of red splattered across her palms, not wanting to alarm Alex. Little did she know, he could already smell the blood.
“What was your dream about?” he narrowed his eyes and watched her expectantly. His penetrating gaze forced her to suddenly look away in order to break its hold.
“I can’t remember.”
“You’re lying,” he replied dryly, his candor catching her off guard.
“Yup.” Marie couldn’t believe she’d actually admitted the truth. She was known to defend a lie down to her last breath, but something about Alex pulled the truth from her like a serum. “Honestly, it was a terrifying dream, and I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Why didn’t you just say that to begin with?”
“If I had, would you have let it go?”
“No,” he smirked. She could read him better than he thought, and in such a short time. “I don’t care if you lie to others, but don’t lie to me. There’s no need.” His words held far more vitriol than he’d intended.
Alex made a point to always keep a straight face and never convey too much emotion in his speech, but Marie pulled his heart to the surface; bloody, beating and vulnerable, for all to see. He needed to figure out how to stop that from happening, but so far, he was at a loss.
Everything about her broke him down and dredged up feelings absolutely foreign to him. While she may not know him that well, he’d been watching her for as long as he could remember. He knew her better than he knew himself. He vowed to build up an immunity to her charms. It was the only way to protect her, and himself.
“Talking about things can be helpful,” he suggested coyly, not one to follow his own advice.
“It’s going to sound stupid, but I think saying your fears out loud is like tempting fate. I’m not paranoid or anything,” she quickly amended. “I don’t think there’s some evil omnipresence constantly listening in, waiting to strike,” she rolled her eyes. “I just feel like once I admit my fears, they’re out there and...possible. Does that make sense?”
“Not really.”
Marie turned away to hide her smile. His bluntness repeatedly caught her off guard. A typical male might feel obliged to agree, whether he understood or not. At least, in her experience. She was happy Alex wasn’t a typical male. His honesty was refreshing, most of the time.
“We still have a few hours until daybreak. Try to get some rest. You’ll need it.” Alex lay back down, shifting into a comfortable position.
Just what I need, to be reminded of tomorrow. She yanked the covers close around her, struggling to hide the sudden shiver coursing through her body. “Sweet dreams,” she mocked.
“Sweet dreams.” In the past second, something had transpired to upset her, but he had no idea what. Sometimes he wondered if he’d ever fully understand the woman lying beside him.
Alex always meant well, but he was totally oblivious. Marie was far too terrified to go back to sleep. What if her dream picked up where it left off? Perhaps this time she wouldn’t wake. Things worked differently here, and she wasn’t taking any chances. Her dreams had changed since she’d come here. They felt far too real, often blending into reality and disorienting her throughout her waking hours.
Marie would’ve preferred for Alex to stay up and talk with her all night, but she wasn’t going to deprive him of what he so desperately needed. It would be selfish and self-destructive, for both of their lives rested solely on his shoulders. It was a tremendous amount of pressure to put on Alex, and it asked a lot of Marie, who had so little faith.
She started to think about everything Fallon had told her about Anthros. She had quickly forgotten her dream amongst her ruminations, because reality was far more frightening. If it was as bad as Fallon and Cayden made it out to be – which she had no doubt it was – why would anyone choose to go there?
Laylia was obviously just as crazy as the rest of them. That is, if she was actually on Anthros. That was the worst part of all of this; all four of them could be risking their lives for nothing, just to follow a false tip.
Marie stared blankly at the wall for the remainder of the night. Her cruel and boundless imagination conjured up every possible horrible scenario it could, filling her head with endless dark thoughts that gave life to her fears. Alex would never take me to a place that dangerous unless he was absolutely certain he could protect me!
One thing she didn’t doubt was Alex’s devotion. She may not know him that well yet, but she had no doubt he valued his own life, and it was unequivocally linked to hers. However, when she considered the greeting they’d received when they arrived on Milités, she didn’t feel quite so assured. She’d never been in any real danger here, but what if she had?
She let the salty frustration pour from her eyes in rapid torrents. She couldn’t hold back any longer, and she didn’t want to. She begrudgingly willed her sobs to crawl into Alex’s ears and rip him from his dreams, prompting him to wrap his arms around her as he offered her comfort the only way he knew how, but that dream never came true.
Marie spent the next few hours wishing, praying, hoping, and crying as she held herself against the panic. Nothing seemed to ease the fear that swelled with every new breath, shortening the next.
She felt thunderstruck when the sun reared its ugly head, representing the dawn she so vehemently dreaded. She propped herself up on her elbows, greeting the blazing light with tired eyes and nonexistent resolve.
How am I going to get through this? She buried her face in her hands, succumbing to the darkness.
ISABEL
The sun bled through the cracks of the cylindrical hut, dancing across Alex’s eyelids as they fluttered open. He turned on his side and looked up at Marie. She was barely holding it together. Dark circles rimmed her puffy red eyes as her pupils devoured the surrounding ocean, reflecting a wan pallor.
She hasn’t slept. He sighed, feeling guilty for having slept hi
mself. “Are you alright?” She couldn’t seem to stop fidgeting.
“You’re always asking me if I’m alright,” she hissed, turning away. “It’s really annoying. I’m fine, okay?”
Marie didn’t function well on little sleep. As soon as the words left her mouth, she felt the sharp twinge of guilt, but irritability had a tendency to dull her conscience and her tact. It wasn’t Alex’s fault she hadn’t slept, but unfortunately for him, he was the closest target for the angst she’d built up over the past few hours.
“Did you sleep well, Alex?” Just when Marie thought things couldn’t get any worse, Fallon came sauntering in through the door, sporting skimpy negligee and without knocking, of course. “Are you experiencing any morning male phenomenon that requires my assistance?” Fallon’s eyes made a beeline for Alex’s groin.
Perfect. A new target. Marie focused all of her vitriol on Fallon as she scooted slightly closer to Alex.
“Great Lucidus, Fallon!” Cayden’s expression soured at her words. “Act like a lady, for once!” He held a fist over his mouth to hide his guilty smile. He couldn’t deny that she always amused him. “Mariella. Alex,” he politely inclined his head in greeting.
“Please don’t call me Mariella.” The words were right, but her tone was clipped. “My name is Marie. It’s always been Marie, and that’s what I prefer to be called.” Normally, she couldn’t care less what he called her, but right now it was the one thing she could control, and she wasn’t going to let anyone take that away from her. She needed some semblance of familiarity before she lost her mind.
“Aren’t you a delight this morning? Didn’t sleep that well last night, did you?” Fallon grinned sinisterly.
A guttural hum rumbled in the back of Marie’s throat as she furrowed her brows in response, prompting a sudden interjection from Cayden upon seeing the fire in her eyes.
“Alex, I’d like you to help Fallon load the supplies. Meet us at the Armory when you’re finished.”