The Presence

by Charlene Neil

  “Thanks,” she said softly. “My oldest brother raised me until I left school. We don’t talk much anymore. I guess he blames me for never achieving much in his life. Instead of going to college, he was stuck with me. I send him money every now and then, you know, to try make up for his losses.” She took a big gulp of beer as if to drown out the memories. “Okay, your turn.”

  “I was the only child. My dad and I were very close. He passed away three years ago. Brain tumor.”

  “God, now it’s my turn to say I’m so sorry to hear that. And your mom?”

  “My mom took my ex-husband’s side when I left him. She refuses to talk to me. I try calling her every now and then for Sarah’s sake, but can you believe she will only acknowledge her granddaughter when she’s at her dad’s?”

  “Wow. That’s awful.”

  “The a-hole cheats on me, and my mom blames me for it.”

  “Family. Blood is supposed to be thicker than water.” Rebecca stared ahead of her into space.

  They sat silently for a while, and then Kayleigh decided to be brave. She cleared her throat. “You promised me you would be honest with me from now on. Can I ask you something and whatever the answer, I give you my word not to be mad and not to run?”

  Rebecca nodded and she continued.

  “Have you ever had any feelings for me?” As soon as the question was out in the open, she felt all the air squeezed out of her lungs. She wasn’t even sure what answer she hoped for.

  “I prefer not to answer that.” Rebecca avoided eye contact and took a long gulp from her beer.

  “Why?” Kayleigh asked, her heartbeat speeding up.

  “That’s not the sort of question you ask someone.” Rebecca laughed nervously. “Why would you ask something like that, anyway?”

  “I don’t mean to put you on the spot and I have no idea why I want to know. I just want to know.” Kayleigh could see her own hand shaking as she put the beer to her lips. The bottle top hit her teeth and vibrated against them as she tried to take a sip.

  “I’ve thought about you, yes. A lot, actually. Why? Care to try it?” Rebecca asked with a challenging tone. She turned her face toward Kayleigh, and Kayleigh didn’t miss the fire of desire that sparked in her blue eyes.

  Kayleigh felt the blush warm her cheeks. She actually thought she heard the blood rushing to her face. “I don’t know what I want, Rebecca,” she managed to say in a voice barely above a whisper. God, I want you to kiss me.

  Rebecca hurriedly drank some more beer. “You make me bloody nervous, you know. Look at me.” She held up her bottle. “I’m downing this beer and I’m now sloshed.”

  “I like having you here. When you’re not here, I miss you. Those three weeks apart were hell.” Kayleigh placed a hand on Rebecca’s leg and leaned into her. Touching Rebecca felt so good.

  “You’re right. They were hell.” Rebecca put her arm around Kayleigh’s shoulders and pulled her closer.

  Kayleigh felt the warmth of Rebecca’s throat against her face and turned to put her mouth at the base of her neck. Her lips found the soft skin there and opened her mouth slowly to allow her tongue to taste Rebecca’s skin.

  Rebecca moaned and pushed her back gently. “Kay, what are you doing?”

  Kayleigh didn’t miss the catch in her voice.

  “Don’t play games with me, please.”

  “I don’t play games with people. Especially people I care about.” Kayleigh felt the heat creep up her cheeks again. She had no idea what she was doing.

  Rebecca pulled away from Kayleigh to look into her eyes, “You want the complete truth? Are you sure you’re ready for it?”

  Kayleigh nodded.

  “The truth is, it’s very difficult for me to be friends with you. I’m extremely attracted to you. I think about you constantly. I miss you when you’re not around. I want to touch you and hold you all the time.”

  The words tumbled out so fast, Kayleigh had a hard time keeping up.

  Rebecca drained her beer and got up. Kayleigh saw the anguish in her dark eyes. “And that concludes our session for today. I hope you’re happy now.”

  Before Kayleigh could respond, Rebecca rushed for the door and left. Kayleigh stared after her. What had just happened? At least now she knew that Rebecca had feelings for her. Feelings that Kayleigh suddenly realized she could never return, despite the fire that burned down low when she touched her lips to Rebecca’s skin. She had Sarah to think about.

  Chapter 12

  1897 Hoekwil

  Joshua came home from the fields one day and found Catherine lying on the kitchen floor. She was bleeding and seemed to be in severe pain. He yelled out for help, and Evelyn came storming into the house from outside. She helped Catherine up and took her to the bedroom.

  While Evelyn was busy with Catherine, Joshua marched up and down the passage waiting for the verdict. He was petrified that something bad would happen and he’d lose Catherine and the baby.

  “Come now, nonna, you must try, push this baby out.”

  He heard Evelyn speaking low as she crouched by the bedside as Catherine lay moaning in agony.

  “It’s too soon, Evelyn. No, too soon…” Catherine cried out.

  Joshua peered in through the doorway, and then he disappeared along the passage and down the stairs. He called for Stander, his fastest helper, to saddle up his stallion. Joshua leapt up on the horse to go fetch the doctor while Catherine was in Evelyn’s care. As his horse chewed up the distance to the doctor with each stride, Joshua prayed for his wife and unborn child.

  “Dear Lord God, please keep my wife safe. Please keep my baby alive and watch over them.”

  †

  Catherine was only eight months along and was worried that if the baby came this soon, a month early, it would die. She knew that once she’d started bleeding, there was no going back. Her contractions had started a few hours after the onset of bleeding, even as she prayed they would stop…it was too soon.

  Another contraction wracked her body. Catherine hadn’t thought it possible that a human could experience so much pain.

  “I’m never doing this again.” she cried and she started to push. Evelyn had her hands between Catherine’s legs as she tried to guide the baby’s head out of the birth canal.

  “I can see the head, nonna. Push!”

  Chapter 13

  Present day

  A week had passed since that night on the patio, and Rebecca had spent very little time with Kayleigh. Rebecca showered, brushed her teeth, and stood in front of her bedroom mirror naked. Never in a million years did she think a straight woman would intrigue her as much as Kayleigh. The thought scared her to death, but she knew she needed to be strong and resist. She tried to ignore the constant ache inside. She longed to touch Kayleigh and she ached for Kayleigh to touch her too. She shook her head and grabbed her jeans from the bed.

  She could never be with Kayleigh, no matter how attracted she was to her.

  It would help if Kayleigh weren’t such a damned charmer. The way she touched Rebecca… Kayleigh’s eye contact, the way she walked, the way she drank her damned coffee. Everything she did was sexy.

  “Get a grip, Rebecca,” she said to the mirror.

  †

  While Kayleigh was working, she’d notice Rebecca’s head bobbing up from behind her counter in an obvious attempt to get a glimpse at Kayleigh. She enjoyed the attention, but she was petrified of leading Rebecca on. Their friendship had taken a turn after that night outside on her deck. Knowing that Rebecca had feelings for her was a completely different ball game, and she wasn’t sure how to approach the subject. Since that night, they’d kept conversations light and impersonal.

  The bell of the door rang, and in walked Brenda Smith. Damn.... Brenda was the town’s own walking talking news channel. She knew everything about everyone and loved to gossip.

  “Hey, Dr. Gibbs. How are you?”

  “Hi, Brenda. I’m fine and how—”

  “Did you know th
at Garry and Nancy are selling their house? That ugly house that’s barely standing! Can you believe the nerve? Nobody…” Brenda rambled non-stop as usual. Why even ask how people are when you don’t listen to the answer? Double damn, Kayleigh thought angrily.

  Kayleigh nodded and acted like she was listening. She wished it were Rebecca who had entered the office instead.

  “Doctor, please come quick! My cat!” Ronda Williams, flushed, with a tear-stained face, came storming in through the door. Kayleigh was glad for the distraction, but worried about the reason for it. Stepping around Brenda, with an apologetic smile, she went toward Ronda, the mother of one of Sarah’s classmates. Kayleigh ran to her car where she found the cat lying on the front seat. The cat was in obvious distress. She was panting with her mouth wide open and mewing. Kayleigh gently picked the cat up with both hands and proceeded back to her surgery room. The cat was obviously pregnant and perhaps having difficulties delivering, her tail and lower legs were soaked in blood and urine. Ronda followed close on her heels after closing the car door.

  “Please. You have to save her, she’s my baby!”

  “What happened?” Kayleigh asked as she pulled on a pair of gloves.

  “I’m not sure. I found her on the side of the road just outside my house, she might have been hit by a car. She’s expecting a litter soon, Doc.” She was sobbing.

  At times like this, Kayleigh really wished she had an assistant. Pet owners were always in distress in these situations, and in the way when they thought they were helping. Kayleigh needed all of her focus to be on the cat. She was terrified of not being good enough to save the kitty’s life.

  “She’s bleeding, badly, and I need to operate immediately. Please wait in the waiting area for me,” Kayleigh said as she shaved a leg so the veins could be easily accessible. She drew up a syringe with anesthetics, which she administered quickly to sedate the cat.

  Kayleigh watched as Ronda, with slouched shoulders, hesitantly left the surgery. She saw Rebecca come into the office, and to her rescue. She must have noticed the commotion from her store. She took Ronda by the shoulders and led her to the waiting room, and had her sit. She gazed up, saw Kayleigh watching her from the surgery, and winked at her. Rebecca nodded encouragingly.

  Kayleigh proceeded in doing the caesarean section and managed to save one kitten. It was a little black one, premature, of course. The two other kittens didn’t make it. While the cat was sedated, she took some x-rays and found the cat had a fractured hind leg, which forced Kayleigh to operate for more than an hour longer. She had to put in some k-wires, and then round it off with a splint with thick crepe bandages. By the time she finished working, the cat appeared stable, although she’d lost a lot of blood and was very weak. Kayleigh tried to keep the kitten as warm as possible, but wasn’t sure if it was strong enough to survive the ordeal. Once again, she berated herself for not having an assistant who would be able to help.

  After cleaning up, she stopped by the waiting room. “Ronda, do you want to come and see your kitty?”

  Ronda got up and walked toward Kayleigh. “Will Mittens be okay?” she asked, with a trembling voice.

  “I believe she’ll have a full recovery.”

  Rebecca had stayed. Kayleigh looked at her. “You can come and have a look as well, if you want.”

  Rebecca got up eagerly, and followed the other two women into the surgery. Mittens was half awake, but still very groggy from the anesthesia. Kayleigh took the kitten and tried to get it to latch onto its mother, but the kitten refused. Mittens mewed, and Kayleigh decided to give her a rest.

  “You’re going to have to leave her here for a day or two so I can keep an eye on her, but I think she will be all right.”

  “And the kitten?”

  “We’ll need to nurse him until Mittens is able to take over.”

  “You’re an angel sent by God.” Ronda thanked her and hugged her.

  “Shall I go and fetch Sarah from school for you?” Rebecca asked.

  “What about your store?”

  “I already put a sign on the door: Gone fishing. It’s fine. I don’t mind.”

  “You are my angel sent by God. I would appreciate that very much, thank you.”

  Kayleigh spent the rest of the day at the practice, looking after the new kitten and its mom. She called around and managed to find a vet nurse named Faith, who could work the nightshift for her and Faith relieved her by seven.

  Rebecca had taken Sarah home and said she’d stay there until Kayleigh got off work.

  While Kayleigh tended to some other pets before she started for home, the conversation from the previous week played over and over in her mind. She still wasn’t sure about how she was feeling. Was it really possible for her to be attracted to Rebecca?

  Before leaving, she made sure Faith knew how to feed the kitten and asked her to call in case there were any problems. Kayleigh promised to be back the following morning at seven.

  As she drove home, rain started to come down in buckets and she had to stop at the nearest gas station in order to put up the Jeep’s top. She was soaked through and freezing cold by the time she finally had the roof top up and continued the rest of the trek home. It was dark by then. The heavy rain forced her to slow down, making the trip a much longer one.

  While driving, Rebecca entered her thoughts again. She wondered what it would be like to be with a woman and before she could stop herself, she imagined Rebecca moving closer and touching her lower back and pulling her into her....

  She thought of what it would feel like to stand against Rebecca, to have her body flush against her. She imagined Rebecca’s lips meeting hers, tasting her sweet tongue, and feeling it massage her own. Her hands slid down Rebecca’s back and found the bottom edge of her shirt, and she slipped her hands under that shirt. She slid her hands softly over Rebecca’s bare back and felt her skin on her fingertips. Rebecca moaned and pulled her closer still. Kayleigh pushed her pelvis against Rebecca’s, and Rebecca moaned louder.

  As the fantasy played out in her mind, Kayleigh dropped her hand between her legs, imagining it was Rebecca’s hand pushing up against her. The aching in her center was unbearable. She leaned back in the seat and thrust her pelvis against her hand. A soft moan escaped from between her parted lips and for an instant, she forgot where she was and closed her eyes.

  The Jeep jerked. She quickly pulled her hand away from between her thighs and grabbed the steering wheel with both hands. In her carelessness, the Jeep had veered off the road onto the gravel. It was so close to the curb that she went over the edge. Twisting the wheel to right the Jeep almost made it roll.

  She slowed to a stop to catch her breath and steady her nerves. How stupid of her to lose control like that. She was near home, and if she didn’t stop fantasizing about the forbidden, she’d kill herself in a car crash and never make it there. Taking a deep breath, she shoved the images of Rebecca from her mind, pulled slowly back onto the road, and concentrated on her driving.

  †

  Kayleigh pulled the Jeep into the driveway and felt a wave of heat and dizziness rush through her. Her heart fluttered crazily and her stomach went into knots at the very thought that Rebecca was only about fifty yards away. She ran through the pouring rain toward the front door and went inside. Once inside, she shut the door behind her and couldn’t resist calling out. “Hi, honey, I’m home!”

  Giggles came from the kitchen, which she barely heard over the teenage music band blaring from the stereo. Rebecca popped her head from the kitchen doorway. “Hi, honey!” She laughed. “Very original. How was the rest of your day?”

  “Hectic, but great, thanks. What are you two up to?” She reached the kitchen and saw Sarah was stirring something on the stove. Kayleigh gave her a warm hug. “Hi, baby. I missed you.”

  She kissed her on the top of her head and then glimpsed the witches’ brew that was bubbling away in the pot. “Did you remember the newt’s breath and the cat’s claw?”

  Sarah gig
gled again. “Maa, it’s bean soup. You know, for the rainy weather? We can snuggle up in front of the fireplace while we have dinner.”

  Kayleigh looked around at Rebecca in surprise. Rebecca held a beer in her direction. “For you, ma’am.” She nodded at Sarah. “We had a great day. I absolutely adore your daughter. You have done a marvelous job in raising her.”

  Kayleigh took the beer and warmed with the compliment. It was rare that anyone gave her important compliments. “Thanks, nice of you to notice.” She took another step closer to Rebecca and winked. “And what’s this about the fireplace?”

  “Well, honey,” Rebecca said with teasing eyes, “Sarah and I went to the store and got some wood. We then made a fire in the fireplace. It was a bit rusty and caused a lot of smoke at first, but it’s fine now.” Her gaze dropped to Kayleigh’s chest.

  Kayleigh felt her nipples harden even more—and it wasn’t just from the cold rain.

  “You should go put on some dry clothes,” Rebecca whispered before turning away.

  Kayleigh felt a flush of pleasure, knowing the effect she was having on Rebecca.

  “Thanks for the fire.” Kayleigh lifted her beer bottle. “Cheers.” After taking a sip, she set the bottle down and proceeded up the stairs to her bedroom. After quickly changing into a dry pair of slacks and a sweatshirt, she went back downstairs to the lounge area where the fireplace radiated a warm glow. Rebecca followed her to the lounge and when Kayleigh sat down on the two-seater, Rebecca sat down next to her.

  “How’s the kitten?” Rebecca looked concerned.

  “Refuses to drink from the mom. I had to start him on formula through an oro-gastric tube.” At Rebecca’s confused expression, she explained. “It’s a hair-strand little tube that passes from the mouth into the stomach. I gave it one milliliter. Do you know how little one milliliter is? It needs a feeding every hour. Had to hire a nurse to take over tonight. Couldn’t leave the kitten and his mom alone. Poor Faith is going to have a rough night.”