Cautious (Sequel to Disastrous)

by Montes, E. L.

  I knew she was thinking about our argument. Her eyes watered, and she leaned over the sink and took slow steady breaths. After she calmed herself, trying to not cry, she looked back in the mirror and ran a piece of cotton wipe covered with some type of gunk along her cheekbones. She was trying to hide the red blotches that formed when she broke out in tears. I was a fucking asshole. I promised myself that I would never cause hurt or tears for her again, and that’s exactly what I had done. There she was crying over me again.

  Mia must have finally sensed my presence because she looked up in the mirror and our eyes locked. Her eyes were filled with sadness, and I was the one responsible for it. She tore her eyes away and continued to apply her makeup, as if I wasn’t there, as if she didn’t want anything to do with me.

  And that fucking hurt.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  MIA

  There was no strength left inside of me: I didn’t want to argue, cry, or even deal with any of it anymore. I just wanted to get ready and meet up with the others for dinner that evening. Marcus stood by the bathroom door, and I could feel his lingering heated gaze. I wasn’t sure how long he was watching me, but the moment our eyes locked in the reflection of the mirror, I wanted nothing more than to reach out to him, touch him, feel him, and somehow comfort him. How could I? I was wrong and I knew it.

  I had truly thought our relationship had taken a leap, that we were finally moving forward, but at that moment, I wasn’t sure anymore. There would always be doubt and secrets, but how much could a relationship take? I loved him. I truly, with all of my heart and soul, loved him more than any person could love another. Despite that fact, a time may come when even a love that strong might not be enough. Until then, I had no choice but to stick it out and fight for us. Was he willing to do the same? As the doubt crept through my veins, I felt the warmth of fresh tears sting my eyes again. Great, I had tried to steady my tears for the last fifteen minutes, and the fact that he was in the bathroom watching me wasn’t helping.

  Reaching out for a tissue from the granite vanity, I quickly dabbed it along my lids. Come on, Mia. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. I took a few steady breaths, and that was when I felt him directly behind me. His hand gently clasped my arm. For a moment, he was hesitant as my body immediately stiffened at his touch, but then he twirled me around to face him. My body pressed against the counter top, as my gaze met his.

  With troubled eyes, he framed my face with his hands. Gently he caressed my cheeks with his thumbs. We continued to stare at each other at a loss for words, afraid that any simple word spoken could be the wrong one.

  “I’m sorry,” he finally said. My mouth opened to speak, but he cut me off. “No, listen to me. I’m an asshole. I’m sorry.” With pinched brows, he shook his head, as if trying to rid himself of a memory.

  “Yes, you are an asshole, sometimes.” He raised a brow at that. “But you had every reason to be upset. I should be the one apologizing, not you. I’m sorry.”

  “Well, I’m trying to grow up.” He chuckled beneath his breath, and then expression grew serious again. He then pressed his lips together before tightening his hold along my face. “Mia, I know that my temper sometimes gets the best of me. I’m trying to work on that—on a lot of things actually. Telling you how I feel is a major one, but I’m also trying to do all of this without having to hand over my man card.”

  I snorted at that last comment. “Is that what this is all about? Maintaining your man card?”

  “No, I just wanted to see you smile.” He lightly shrugged and flashed an adorable crooked grin. It was difficult to not forgive that smile, but I dropped my amusement to show him that our argument hadn’t been forgotten. He must’ve understood, because he released his hold from my face to grip my hips and lift me on top of the counter. He nestled in between my legs, rested his hands along my thighs, and cleared his throat. “Okay, give it to me.” He blurted. Confused, I awkwardly shrugged, unaware of what he wanted me to give. “Tell me what’s on your mind, at this very moment.” He tapped his fingers against my thighs waiting for me to speak up.

  “Well, to be honest?” He nodded once for me to go on. “It’s frustrating being your girlfriend.” He laughed out loud not expecting that response from me, I was sure.

  “Go on.”

  I let out a heavy sigh. “You have no idea how much I love you one minute and want to strangle you the next.”

  “Ditto.” He nodded once and then laughed at my pointed glare.

  “I’m serious, Marcus. I want you to be able to tell me what you’re feeling. Granted, not every single thing, because let’s face it, I don’t tell you every time I’m down, stressed, or in a shitty mood.” I raised my hand and pressed it against his jaw line, allowing my fingers to trace along the prickles of his facial hair. “But when something is bothering you deep down, and it’s taking a toll on you, on us, I expect you to confide me. Believe it or not, I’m not going anywhere, Marcus. I’m not running away from our problems. I want to fix them, even if we have to argue it out at first. That’s okay, as long as you know I’m going to be here to talk it out with you at the end of it.”

  I searched his face and smiled as a soft grin formed along his lips as he said, “I truly don’t deserve you, but I’m grateful every single day that you’re mine. I know it’s frustrating at times, and I appreciate that even through all the bullshit you still stick around. I didn’t realize how much my bottled-up problems bothered you. I promise to work harder at it. Just know that I am trying.”

  My fingers ran down his face. “I know you are, baby. I just need you to try a little harder.” He let out a chuckle. “Although, I do have to thank you.”

  Puzzled, he glanced up, his brown eyes no longer filled with the anger he held earlier. “For what?”

  “For coming in here and talking it out, for once not using sex as a way to cope with our issues, for allowing me to spill my feelings, and for just listening.”

  Marcus still held a confused expression in his eyes as he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in closer to him. “Wait, so no make-up sex?”

  Rolling my eyes, I grabbed his face and pulled him in for a quick kiss. “No, we need to finish getting ready and meet up with the others.”

  “Not even a quickie?” His lips parted into a full-blown grin.

  Shaking my head, I slapped his bicep and hopped off the counter. “Get ready, Marcus.” I turned around, facing the mirror again to finish applying my makeup, a bit more content than earlier.

  He slapped my ass and headed toward the bedroom, yelling behind him. “Fine, but that ass is mine tonight.”

  Oh my God, what was I going to do with that man?

  ***

  “Mia, you look beautiful.” William shouted over the noise in the crowded restaurant as he pulled me into a hug.

  “Thank you.” I pulled away from our embrace and checked out his attire: khaki pants, a red cashmere sweater, and brown loafers. His grey goatee was neatly trimmed and his musky cologne engulfed the waiting area of the restaurant. “You look very handsome.” I smiled up at him as I caught his cheeks flushing.

  As my grandfather and Marcus greeted each other, I hugged my grandmother who was dressed in a navy blue skirt and matching blouse, with pearl earrings and necklace. “How are you, darling?” She asked as we untangled.

  “Good, where are the others?” I searched over her shoulders to find them but couldn’t make out where they were.

  With a wave of her hand, she wrinkled her nose. “They’re late.” Kathy shook her head in disapproval. “That daughter of mine is always late. They’ll be here soon.”

  We waited ten minutes before our table was called. A waitress, who instantly took notice of Marcus, led us to a round table set for seven. After we took our seats, she handed us a wine and drink menu to view while we waited for the rest of our company.

  “Marcus, what’s your poison? Are you a liquor or beer man?” William spoke as his eyes scanned over the drink menu.
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br />   Marcus cleared his throat, and leaned back as he wrapped an arm behind my chair. “I’m more of a liquor man, but I’m always down for a good beer.”

  “Whisky?” William looked up from the menu with an arched brow toward Marcus.

  “Yes, sir.”

  William’s lips curled into a grin. “Atta boy. Ma’am?” He waved the waitress back over and handed over the menu, “Two Johnnie Walkers on the rocks, a glass of merlot for my wife here, and, Mia?” He looked at me.

  “A cosmo, please.” The waitress nodded before turning on her heels and padding her way toward the bar.

  William looked over at Marcus and me. With a huge grin, he leaned his elbows on the table. “So, with all that was going on yesterday, we didn’t have much time to discuss the two of you. How long have you been dating?”

  I wasn’t expecting that, and as I started doing the math, Marcus chimed in, “Six months.”

  My head snapped in his direction, and with furrowed brows, I questioned it, “Really?”

  Smiling, he ran his hand up and down my arm. “Yes, babe. We met in April. Well, to be technical, we met at the end of April, so it’ll be six months in a couple of weeks.”

  “Wow, I didn’t realize it was that long. It felt so much shorter.”

  “That’s a good thing, honey,” Kathy said with a smile.

  “It is?” I questioned.

  “Oh, yeah,” William chuckled. “Kathy and I have been married for over forty years, and it feels like yesterday when she agreed to marry me.” He leaned in and kissed the side of her head.

  Adoration filled his eyes as he took a moment to admire his wife. I couldn’t help but smile at the two of them. “It wasn’t easy. It still isn’t easy,” Kathy added. “Marriage takes a lot of work, but if you can find someone willing to accept your flaws, it eventually works itself out.”

  Marcus gently squeezed my arm, and my mind traveled to our earlier conversation in the bathroom. He must have thought about it as well. The discussion about marriage caused my thoughts to wander to our engagement that was put on hold. When Marcus and I rekindled our relationship a month ago, it was something that we both agreed to put aside as we worked on us. Marriage was no longer the priority; building our relationship was.

  When the waitress arrived with our drinks, William lifted his glass. “To a long life together.” Marcus and Kathy lifted their glasses with a simple nod, and we all took a sip of our drinks.

  “You guys started the party without us?” Megan complained as she approached us with my mother and Jeremy trailing behind her.

  “Come join us, my dear. Our drinks just arrived,” Kathy uttered with a wave of her hand.

  All three joined us and took their seats at the table. “Hello, what would you like to drink?” The waitress asked as she took note of the new guests at our table. Megan ordered a martini, Jeremy a beer, and my mother a glass of wine.

  After everyone had settled in with their drinks and had placed their dinner order, we began a casual discussion. “So, how are you enjoying Philly, Marcus and Mia?” Sara asked as she sipped on her wine.

  Marcus went first. “I like it a lot here. It was nice seeing Mia’s face light up at places she’d remembered as a child.”

  Smiling at his statement, I placed my hand on his leg underneath the table. “It brought back a lot of wonderful memories of Dad and Michael.” Sara gently nodded with a soft smile.

  “Yeah, I’m really digging this place.” Jeremy decided to add, even though nobody had asked for his opinion.

  “Oh, Marcus and Mia, I hope you guys don’t mind if Jeremy and I ride back to Boston with you. Sara is staying a little longer, and I have work on Monday,” Megan stated with a slight shrug and soft playful grin.

  “Yeah, that’s fine.” Marcus replied to her.

  Megan’s smile widened. “Yay, road trip!”

  The rest of the dinner was more fun than I had expected: the discussions, the laughing, the drinking, the jokes—it all was perfect. My grandfather was charming, my grandmother was sweet, Megan was enthusiastic, my mother giggled and talked about the good old days, and Jeremy . . . Well, he was simply Jeremy. Now, Marcus on the other hand . . . I was in awe of him by the end of the night. He joined in on specific topics, cracked a few jokes with Jeremy, and laughed along with my grandmother. It was another side to him that I hadn’t yet witnessed and an experience that I would never forget.

  As the evening came to an end, I said good-bye to my grandparents, squeezed them tightly, and promised to visit again soon. Because I wouldn’t see my mother before we left in the morning, I pulled her into a hug and thanked her for inviting me. I assured her that this trip was just what I needed and that I couldn’t have been more grateful. We drove back to the hotel with Jeremy and Megan as they sat quietly in the back seat. Marcus held my hand in the front seat. He was talkative and discussed certain subjects that William had brought up at dinner, and I laughed right along with him.

  To say that the night ended wonderfully was an understatement.

  ***

  After breakfast that Sunday morning, Marcus, Jeremy, Megan, and I took one last stroll around the City of Brotherly Love before checking out of the hotel. As much as I wasn’t ready to leave just yet, I knew I had a life waiting for me in Boston.

  Jeremy and Megan hopped into the back seat of Marcus’s car as I slid into the front passenger seat right beside Marcus. He reached out and brushed the back of his fingers along my cheek as he flashed an adorable grin and winked before turning on the ignition.

  As soon as Marcus turned the car on, the loud pounding music of Taylor Swift’s song “We Are Never Getting Back Together” hit the speakers. Marcus shook his head before he reached to change the station, but we both froze as we heard a loud, high-pitched voice singing along with the song. It was an absolute shock to the both of us as we turned our heads and focused our eyes on Jeremy.

  Jeremy’s eyes were shut tightly. His head was swaying side to side as he felt the groove of the beat. Marcus and I quickly glanced at each other, amused, and then turned our gazes back to Jeremy. Megan was giggling beside him as she watched as well. Jeremy, not knowing that all eyes were on him, continued to sing in a high-pitched tone about never getting back together.

  Jeremy eyes flashed open, and he stopped howling in mid-song. His brows bunched together as he studied all the eyes on him. “What? Taylor Swift is hot!”

  Marcus snapped his head toward me and with an arched brow said, “This is going to be a long fuckin’ drive.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  MARCUS

  Five and a half hours later, we were back in Boston. Although it had been great to escape, it was also a relief to be home. Jeremy was annoying me during the entire drive. I was glad to have finally dropped his ass off. Megan and Jeremy nagged at each other constantly, which was both amusing and frustrating at the same time. It made me feel a bit more at ease about my relationship with Mia, just knowing that we weren’t the only couple that argued all the time. At least when we did, it was for valid reasons, whereas Megan and Jeremy nitpicked at every detail and then joked about it after an unnecessary argument.

  Mia dropped her things at her apartment and came home with me. I didn’t want to push the issue about moving in together because I knew she wasn’t ready for it. She was satisfied with how we sometimes slept over at each other’s places, but I wasn’t content with it. I wanted her close to me every night. We had put the wedding aside at her request as well. If it had been up to me, I would have married her yesterday. Again, I couldn’t force her into any of it. I just had to stand back and wait until she was ready.

  As I pulled into the driveway of my home, Mia let out a yawn and stretched. We had left Philly around eleven in the morning and had arrived home close to six that evening. It was a long and exhausting fucking drive. After turning off the ignition, we exited the vehicle, and I grabbed our bags. Mia waited by the passenger side as I made my way toward her from the trunk of the car. She le
aned in towards me as I wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “Are you hungry?” I asked as we walked side by side.

  “No, I just want to crawl into bed and sleep. I have an early class in the morning.”

  “Okay, I think I’ll join you. I have a deposition at ten tomorrow morning. We can have an early breakfast before your class.”

  Mia tilted her neck up, and the edge of her lips curled into grin. “What?” I asked matching her smile.

  “Nothing. Sometimes you can be sweet, you know?”

  “Ha, no, I thought I was an asshole.”

  “That too, but sweet for the most part.”

  “I’ll take it.” I kissed the top of her head as she let out a slight giggle.

  We walked up the stairs of the front porch and quickly spotted Jimmie. His head was slumped back against a patio chair with a beer in his hand and a cooler beside his foot. Mia and I glanced at each other skeptically and then went over towards him. Jimmie never drank when he was watching Elle. He said it was a bad example.

  As we approached Jimmie, I noticed that his eyes were closed. I wasn’t sure if he was asleep, so I tapped his boot with mine. “Hey, Bro.”

  Jimmie snapped one eye opened. After a few seconds, he collected his thoughts and opened both eyes, “What’s up, guys? How was Philly?” He kept his head back against the chair.

  “It was good.” Mia answered.

  I quickly looked around the porch and then back at him, “Where’s Elle?”

  He let out a heavy sigh, ran a hand over his face, and then sat up straight in his chair. “She’s with Mom. She’s also mad at me because she’s being punished.”

  Laughing once, I arched a brow, “Your punishment for her was sending her to Mom? Mom spoils her rotten.”

  He raised both brows as he chugged the rest of the beer. After he finished, he placed it on the floor beside four other empty bottles. Reaching into the cooler, he twisted open another one and leaned back. “Yeah, well, she called Mom after I punished her and said, and I quote, ‘Grandma, Daddy is not being a fair father, and I want to run away.’” He took a long pull on the fresh beer and then shrugged, “So, of course, Mom came to the rescue. After Mom and I talked, well, more like argued about my parenting skills, she took Elle out to calm her down. That was forty minutes ago.”