by Amber Lynn
Nelson didn’t have a response, which was expected. He probably felt the same way she did when he’d asked her to marry him and she’d eloquently lost the ability to think. While she waited for him to say anything, her body remained stiff and turned away from him. She was a little afraid of how he’d react. Not for her own safety, but she thought there was a good chance he’d storm out of the apartment.
“That’s not possible.” When he finally came up with something to say, his words weren’t more than a whisper.
“Believe me, it is. While you went to practice that morning, I changed your sheets to get rid of the evidence.” She didn’t think he needed to know about the fact that she’d cleaned him up too. She hadn’t been sure she’d be able to take care of the sheets once the questioning started, but the fact that he had somewhere to be helped things work out in her favor.
“I don’t understand. Had you been drinking? Why in the world would you pick me, especially in the shape I was in? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
Annie put her hand on his thigh and looked down at her lap. She knew there would be more questions, which was exactly why she didn’t want to tell him. Once they started coming out, he didn’t even pause so she could answer.
“No, you didn’t hurt me. If you want to know the honest truth, I took advantage of the situation because I knew you wouldn’t hurt me. It was stupid based on how many years we’ve been friends, but it seemed safer than joining a dating site or picking some guy up at a bar.”
“But three or so months later you found someone, who theoretically would be a better option. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that you never had before. Wouldn’t it have been better if you saved yourself for someone you were dating?”
Nelson reached over and turned her face so he could look at her eyes. She was afraid she’d see anger in his. He had technically made the first move, which made her actions a little less egregious that night, but not much. Thankfully, there was confusion in his eyes, paired with a little hurt. It wasn’t easy for her see, but it beat other emotions.
“Like you said earlier, I don’t regret what happened that night. You’ve always protected me, Nels. I saw it as just an extension of that.”
Getting him to understand probably wasn’t going to happen immediately. He’d never had an issue finding a partner, so he couldn’t put himself in her shoes, and she was sure he’d never been in love with someone enough that he couldn’t think of possibly sleeping with someone else.
“I need a little time to think. You’ve said a lot of things this morning that I wasn’t expecting. I kind of saw marriage being a hard sale, but now you’re dating someone and I took your virginity without even knowing it. In a way I think that changes something. I just don’t know what right now.”
“Nothing has changed. I mean, yeah, our relationship is probably going to be a little weird while we work out the baby thing. That doesn’t mean anything else has to change.” Annie knew that was wishful thinking, but she wanted to put the idea that they could go back to the way things were out there. Sometimes if Nelson thought someone else thought something was a good idea, he’d go along with it.
“I don’t think that’s possible, Annie. There was a part of me that beat myself up for taking advantage of you that night, and whether you say you were the aggressor or not, I should’ve been involved in something that important to you.”
“Would you have said yes if I asked you to have sex with me?” His instant locked jaw that kept Nelson from saying the first words that came to his mind was all Annie needed to see to know the answer to the question. “That’s what I thought. My two-month deal still stands, but I have a feeling you may be rethinking that marriage offer now that you know the truth.”
Annie got up and made her way over to the door. “I think it’s probably time we both had a little alone time to let things digest.”
It took Nelson a second, but he nodded as he saw the logic in her words. “Text me the time of the doctor’s appointment. I don’t care if I have to skip whatever practice is going on that day. I’m going to be there.”
The words were a threat more than anything else, and Annie deserved them. She didn’t say anything else as she closed the door behind him. Their relationship needed a ton of mending, but first she had to make sure Nelson didn’t realize she’d lied about having a boyfriend.
Looking at the clock on the wall above the couch, she saw it was nine. It was still early, but she hoped the one person she could think of to help her out didn’t mind hearing her voice first thing.
Chapter Five
Nelson needed to talk to a voice of reason, and sadly he’d temporarily lost one of his standbys. That meant instead of going back to his apartment to try to figure out what had just happened, he made his way to his car and headed towards Dylan and Casey’s.
There had been many times he’d wished Casey hadn’t built her house so far away, but getting a little distance between him and Annie, and having some drive time to clear his head, was exactly what he needed. There had been very few times in his life when he’d been jealous about something, but he knew he’d never seen red the way he had when he heard Annie had a boyfriend. Sure, jealousy was usually classified as green, but red was all he saw.
He hadn’t gotten over that fact when she went and dropped the bombshell about her being a virgin up until the night he didn’t remember. No matter how many times she said things were okay, he felt like a jerk for how things must have played out. Hearing more details only made him strive harder to remember anything he could, but his brain was a total blank.
He thought about the smell of vanilla, which seemed to always follow her around and make him hungry. The smell had to have surrounded him that night, but it didn’t trigger any memories. He wanted to know how her lips felt against him; whether her smooth skin was tickled by the hair on his body. He needed to know everything, and yet could only imagine based on other experiences.
Remembering and reconciling the fact that it had been Annie’s first time were things he was going to have to work out on his own, because they weren’t things he could get Dylan’s advice on. Nelson sighed as he thought about how nice it would’ve been if everything was happening during the season. He did some of his best thinking out on the ice. Hockey was a team sport, but there were times he felt all alone out there and those times generated some of his greatest epiphanies.
When he pulled up the long drive to the house, he was happy to see Dylan outside washing his car. It was a peculiar sight that early in the morning, but at least he wasn’t waking anyone up. If there wasn’t an indication of life moving around, he’d decided he would sit in his car and wait for a light to come on. Waking up the happy little family wasn’t on his list of things to do.
Dylan continued to scrub what was probably invisible dirt off the car. The trip to the diner the day before was more than likely the first time it had seen the dirt of the road for a while. After playing hockey for years, certain activities were routine that tied in with superstitions, and as long as there wasn’t rain or snow, Dylan was out washing that car every Sunday. Dylan said the tradition started back in high school when his team won some big championship after he’d spent the morning focusing on cleaning the mud off his car.
His friend looked up from his bucket of soapy water as he approached. His usual smile was quick to spread across his face. Dylan had always been a pretty easy-going guy, but it was rare to see him without a smile after he’d found Casey. There was something about her that made Dylan complete.
Nelson had started dreaming about finding something like what the two of them had. They were both too stubborn to be called a perfect couple, but they somehow made everything work. There had to be someone out there who could make other guys want to smack the smile off Nelson’s face when they saw how happy he was, a reaction he sometimes got when he saw Dylan.
He hoped maybe he could find something like that with Annie, since they were having a baby together. It was weird
to think of her as anything more than just a friend, but she did make him smile.
“I think the last time I saw you out of bed this early was my last early morning practice. I’m guessing by the look on your face, you aren’t hoping to have Casey make you an all-star breakfast.” Dylan raised his voice to be heard over the dying rumble of the SUV’s engine. If Nelson hadn’t rolled his window down on the way over, he probably wouldn’t have heard a thing.
Nelson laughed as he got out of his vehicle. “You and I both know that Casey’s idea of making breakfast involves a box of cereal and a bowl, so don’t try to pass her off as a chef. Plus, I was there in the hospital when your daughter was born, and Katie thought the ungodly hour of two in the morning was a great time to come into the world.”
Dylan nodded, threw a sponge into the bucket and walked over to Nelson. It was unfair that he still looked like he’d had a full eight hours of sleep. According to him, Katie wasn’t sleeping through the night, and he was up with her more than Casey.
“I guess that’s true. You look like crap, Nels. Did you get any sleep last night?”
“Sure. I think there was an hour or so that I wasn’t up trying to figure out what was going on,” Nelson said as he leaned against the front of the SUV. “I asked her to marry me this morning, which probably has more to do with my appearance than anything else.”
“And you’re still alive? You made sure there weren’t any sharp objects around first, right?”
“I didn’t, but I’m guessing you already know she said no.”
Dylan took a position next to Nelson and playfully punched him in the shoulder. He knew that Nelson was down, and it was clear he was doing what he could to keep things light.
“You didn’t hear this from me, but there’s a rumor out there that Annie likes you a little more than you like her, and I imagine hearing someone you’re fond of proposing marriage, when you know they don’t feel the same, isn’t going to go over very well. What made you ask her? I thought you said yesterday that you knew she’d say no.”
Nelson looked over at his friend, wondering if he’d lost his mind. He had to have been reading the tabloids again to find a rumor about Annie liking him. After they quit writing stories about Dylan, Nelson thought he’d stopped picking up the rubbish. Dylan’s face didn’t show a hint of joking. The smile was still there, but the start of the conversation lessened its brightness.
“I don’t know where you’re getting your information, but Annie doesn’t like me that way. According to her, she’s got a boyfriend and she wants to see where that goes before even considering marrying me.”
Dylan didn’t respond at first. Instead he let out a long sigh. “Are you pissed off about that because you don’t want someone replacing you in your baby’s life, or is there something else going on you should tell me about?”
Nelson had turned his gaze to the trees in the distance, but Dylan’s words made him look over at his friend again. The face that greeted him was unreadable. Any trace of his smile had disappeared. Nelson seemed to have that effect on people.
“Why would you think I’m pissed off about it?” Nelson wasn’t happy about it, but he didn’t think he’d said anything to indicate that.
“Because you ground your teeth together when you said the word boyfriend. It’s one of your tells. I’m guessing she didn’t say anything about cutting off your access to the baby, so I’m going to go out on a limb and say you just don’t want another guy raising your child.”
There was a slight upturn of Dylan’s lips, like he wanted to smile, but didn’t know how it would be received. It seemed there was something Nelson was missing in between his friend’s words.
“I’d prefer there wasn’t another guy in the picture right now. I don’t think it’s good timing for anyone involved. She won’t even tell me who he is, so I can check him out. What if he’s a predator or something? Annie can claim she can take care of herself all she wants, but she doesn’t even weigh a hundred pounds.”
Dylan nodded, like something in what Nelson had said made sense to him, and he’d come to some conclusion. “I haven’t talked to Annie since all this came out, but I don’t think for a second she’d put the baby at risk. We didn’t really get too far into the details yesterday, since you rushed out of the diner to find her. You know I have to ask again, the baby is really yours?”
Nelson wasn’t offended by the question. If he didn’t know Annie as well as he did, he’d question the claim too. Hearing that he was the only person she’d ever slept with made any doubt disappear.
“There’s no question in my mind. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do here, Dylan. I spent last night thinking about it, and I don’t see a problem with us getting married, but she actually shut down for a little bit when I asked her. It was like the thought of being married to me fried her brain cells.”
A crooked grin appeared across Dylan’s face, and just seeing it made Nelson feel a little better. It was weird that the mood Dylan portrayed could cause even a small amount of relief. It was like if Dylan thought things were going to be okay, they had to be.
“Like I said, I don’t have all the details, and I wouldn’t pretend to know what’s the right thing in this case, but I’ve always believed if I was determined to get a certain outcome, it would happen. If you want to marry Annie and have a cute little family, I think you could eventually make it work, but you have to change a few aspects of your thinking first, though.”
Dylan wasn’t quick to divulge what he thought Nelson needed to change. Instead, he pushed himself off the car and walked back over to his morning chore.
“I know everything has worked out for you and Casey, because of your stubbornness, but I think it’s going to take me a little bit more than what it did for you to convince Casey to marry you. You didn’t have another guy in the picture trying to steal Casey from you.”
Dylan shrugged as he massaged the sponge across his car. “I don’t know about that. You could probably convince your sister to try to kill you and make the same coming back from the dead proposal I did. I hear they work every time.”
It still amazed Nelson that Dylan didn’t hold what Steph had done against him. It said a lot about Dylan’s character, and that was the main reason Nelson was there looking for advice.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply things were a cake walk for you, but from an outsider watching the two of you, it seemed like the whole almost dying thing only sped up the path you were already on. Annie and I have never had the passion you two have, and it sounds like that’s something she’s looking for.”
“And yet you’re expecting a baby. I don’t want to hear the particulars, but it’s a little difficult to plant the seed without there being some passion involved.” There was a knowing tone to Dylan’s words.
“Yeah, well, you already guessed that I was drunk that night. What I didn’t tell you was that I don’t remember a thing about it. I was out with the boys one minute, and then the next I woke up with Annie next to me.”
“Dude, seriously? Not meaning any disrespect to Annie, but that had to be a rude awakening.
No wonder you said you stopped going out with the boys.”
Even if Dylan hadn’t added the no disrespect, Nelson knew the rude awakening was what would happen between him and Annie after the dust settled.
“Exactly. I’ve been kicking myself ever since, but she keeps telling me it wasn’t a big deal, even now that there’s a baby on the way.”
Before Dylan could share what wisdom he had, the door to the house opened and Casey made her way outside. Since her arms were empty, Nelson assumed Katie was taking a nap.
“So, what weather phenomenon is rushing towards us?” Casey’s voice was quieter than her usual cadence. Nelson had been noticing for a while she didn’t yell quite as much as she used to, and he figured Katie’s sleeping habits had something to do with it.
Nelson looked up at the sky, wondering what in the world she was talking about. As far as he
could see, there were few clouds, and they seemed to be the white and fluffy variety.
“She referring to the fact that you’re here this early. Nelson proposed to Annie, and as you can imagine, things didn’t go as he planned.”
Casey scoffed as she settled in the spot next to Nelson that Dylan had recently vacated. “Do you have the ring on you?”
Nelson wasn’t sure what difference that made, but he fished the box out of his pocket and handed it over. Casey slowly whistled after she opened it and saw the ring he’d picked out.
“Well, you aren’t quite as stupid as I thought.” She closed the box and handed it back. “Did you get down on one knee?”
“Of course I did. I went the traditional route with everything other than calling her dad and asking for permission. I didn’t think she’d like someone else knowing I was going to propose before she did.”
Nelson opened the ring box and took another look at the ring. Casey didn’t seem to think he’d made a mistake with the one he’d bought, but it hadn’t helped his cause. He really thought Annie would like that he didn’t just pick up any old ring.
“That’s another two marks in your favor. I take it you didn’t give a speech about how much you loved her and how you wanted marry her not just because you were having a baby, but because you can’t think of living the rest of your life without waking up next to her every morning.”
Casey didn’t need Nelson to confirm or deny whether he’d said those words. Everyone within hearing distance knew that if he’d said them, he’d be lying.
“I take from your silence that’s a no. And you wonder why that was her answer. No woman wants a guy to propose a marriage of convenience. Whether she’s a tomboy or not, Annie has dreams of a wedding and a white picket fence. If you don’t think you can give her all that entails, don’t insult her by giving her half the dream. She deserves more than just you wanting to be there for the baby.”