He walked off without looking back once, a determined stride that radiated confidence, the complete opposite of my unsteady, nervous steps and hunched-over posture. I tried talking to Gia, but my words were obviously not sticking. She seemed lost in thought, so instead I settled for just sitting in silence, sharing her company.
A minute or two later she stood up, smoothing out her skirt and adjusting her bra. She handed me what was left of the joint and kissed me goodnight. I watched with a longing and burning pit in my stomach as she walked toward Dodger’s tent. I hoped and pleaded to whatever gods were left she would veer off somewhere else, but we all know that was completely delusional. She crawled into his tent, and the opening was quickly zipped closed.
here was no way I could go to sleep. My heart was racing, and my palms were sweating. Jealousy. It wasn’t something I was proud of, but unavoidable nonetheless. I had to keep myself occupied, before all the images of Dodger and Gia threatened to overtake me. Something simple.
For the moment, I decided to go find a place to drink, maybe lose the sordid imagery that was going through my head to the dim haze of welcome drunkenness. I looked around and for the first time noticed The Tribe, their makeshift tents and bonfires, children and adults running about, giddy with excitement. As if they weren’t part of the world outside, as if Dodger wasn’t inside his tent with Gia in his arms. A girl and a boy about my age drunkenly laughed, arm in arm marching into a tent with hungry eyes, waving empty mugs in the air. I decided it was my best lead for a drink and followed them.
Inside, the pungent smell of alcohol and smoke greeted me. A rickety generator hummed in the corner, powering flickering lights. A table in the center housed bottles of various makings, old jelly jars, milk bottles, and juice cartons. Filthy mugs held all sorts of drink, meant to whisk you away into drunken bliss.
The couple I followed sat in the corner atop some hastily placed boxes, holding each other close, more engrossed in the taste of each other’s lips than their forgotten drinks. A couple of older men in worn military fatigues sat at the table, laughter and clanking overflowing cups together. At a table off to the side, Red sat leaning over a crumpled sheet of paper, carefully sipping her mug.
First order of business was getting a drink. I walked over to the bar and took inventory. The various bottles were labeled with nonsensical scribbling offering not names, but ideas as to what to expect. The two old timers stared at me with humor in their eyes as I chose to fill my mug with the contents of an old fishbowl, which read toilet hugger.
“Sure you can handle that one, boy?” one asked as the other leered at me, his mustache moist with froth.
“Yeah I’m good.” I took a large swig, meaning to show them off. Instead, they enjoyed another round of laughter as my throat closed up and I broke into a fit of coughing. I tried to blink away tears from my eyes.
“There’s a lad!” The old timer patted my back. “That’ll make your balls drop!” They both continued laughing as I made my way over to Red.
Putting my drink down hard on her table, utterly convinced it would burn its way through both the mug and table alike, I dragged up a crate and looked over the papers she was studying.
“What’s this?” I asked.
“Twist!” She laughed. “Oh, I was just looking over a map of the Sons of Adam territory. I figured it’d help you guys if I pointed you in the right direction.”
I was excited by the idea of seeing her maps; I would be able to shine on our quest, after all. “Can I see? Dodger wouldn’t know what to make of these; I’m usually the one who goes over them.”
“Sure.” She pushed them across the table and dragged her chair closer to me.
“See, the trick is going underground.” I ran my fingers up and down the worn, water-stained pages. “They keep meds in the cathedral, no doubt. But the streets are littered with Angels.”
“Angels are no joke,” she said. “You got to be careful with those religious nut jobs. They’d have no problem slitting your throat in the name of Adam. I heard most of them were convicts and other psychopaths before the world fell apart.”
“Yeah, they patrol top side. If they don’t kill us, they’ll take us to Adam. See what he wants to do with us. But I plan on avoiding them at all costs.” I looked at the knot of colored lines that represented subway systems. “The thing about it, most of the tunnels are crumbled or destroyed, the red and orange lines are completely destroyed so we’d have to make our way to the blue line… we can get there from the 23rd Street station. That area is thick with scavengers, though… but I guess we have to take the chance.”
“Wow, impressive. You really know your stuff, huh?”
“There’s not much to do underground, I spend most of my time reading comics, books, and anything else I can find. I found a whole bunch of subway maps a while ago, started making notes on all the tunnels that were destroyed, dangerous, safe, or occupied. Dodger always thought they were useless, but I figured what better ammunition than knowledge?”
“Look at you!” She ran her hand down my arm. “Here I am making these plans with Dodge and turns out you’re the brains of the operation!”
“Dodger tends to just jump head first and see where he lands. Don’t get me wrong… it works out for him. But I like to be prepared. He always says I’m so boring.”
“Well, I don’t think so! Listen, my kid’s life depends on this. And you don’t know how much I appreciate this.” She looked at me for a bit longer than should have been comfortable; I realized her hand was still resting on my shoulder. I took another swig of the hell fire in order to look occupied and less uncomfortable.
“You guys telling Star Wars tonight?” I asked. Drink and a good story is what I needed. And less awkward.
“No,” she said, pulling her chair closer to me. “I think the story teller is telling the one about the guy who gets bit by a spider.”
“Cool, Spiderman. When does he start?” Another swig, it didn’t burn as much.
“I don’t know, in a bit, I guess, usually when the sun’s down. But I kind of want to talk to you about things, I mean, I’m sure you heard those stories a million times.” She laughed and gave a slow smile as she bit her bottom lip.
“Yeah… I guess… Do you want to go over how we plan to get into the cathedral―”
“What else do you guys do? I mean, this is the first time I seen you guys with a girl, she’s not… your girlfriend… or anything… is she?” Her speech was beginning to slur, and she was starting to turn into two people.
“My girlfriend?” I had to laugh. “No, she’s just some girl we met. She had some problems, and we helped her out. Dodger wanted to ditch her but I wanted to help her. Go figure.”
“Figure what?”
“That she’s with him! I mean you should hear the way he talks to her!” I downed the rest of my mug in one shot.
“Aww.” She placed her hand on mine. “Girls can be like that sometimes, really dumb! Sometimes they ignore the great guy who’s there, and go for the jerk who ignores them.”
“She’s not dumb, she’s just confused.”
She leaned in and kissed my cheek. “You are the bigger catch of the two.”
Her face was flushed with red, and the smell of booze seeped through her skin. She continued smiling. Wasn’t she sober just a minute ago? My eyes were heavy, and my stomach turned. I felt the beating of my heart in my ears.
“Thanks… but, you know? It’s not fair! Everyone thinks Dodger is this great guy.” She nodded as I slurred off. “And he is! But I’m great, too.”
“I think you’re great.” She put her arms around me and pulled me into a hug, resting her head on my shoulder.
“I mean, why would Gia… go with him? We were having this great… this conversation… and it was… you know… great!”
“Yeah, great, just like you!” She kissed me on the neck. “MUAH! For my Twist, Twist the Great!”
“It’s true! I am great!”
“Let
’s not say great again, ever.”
“I’m sorry I just…”
“No.” She looked up at me, leaning in closer. “Don’t ever apologize; you don’t have to never ever apologize to me.”
Fate was cruel when it came to irony. It’d been coming for a while. I thought I could hold it back, swallow down the bile that crept into my mouth. But the constriction of her warm hug didn’t help matters. She screamed as I spewed all over her.
Waking up wasn’t pleasant; I was alive and found this to be the most offensive.
Next came the taste of dead rat in my mouth. I’d never tasted a dead rat in my life, but I imagined the dry leathery stench was not unlike a dead rat. Last and most notable was the pounding that came from within my head, the world spun. But the throbbing of my head, matched to the beat of my heart, only invited a nauseating reenactment of the night before.
Where was I? I rolled onto my back. From the apex of the inner tent, a lantern hung low above my head, with wax dried around the edges and wick unlit. But most surprising of all was Gia, sleeping next to me, a bowl of water between us. A damp cloth lay near where my head lay. Her hand rested inches away from it. I looked at her, and the hangover seemed to slip away. Her lips parted as she breathed, hair falling over her face making her look fragile and angelic. I reached out my unsteady hand and ran her hair behind her ear. She stirred and smiled, but continued sleeping.
“Hey, there, little guy.” Dodger was sitting on a chair in front of me, legs stretched out over the arm. “Look who’s awake!”
“Dodge,” I said stiffly, struggling to sit up. “What happened?”
“I don’t know, as the stories tell, you challenged two old timers to a drinking contest, threw up all over Red, quoted Star Wars, then ran around camp screaming that the moon was chasing you!” He sat up, leaning on his knees. “That was my favorite part. Apparently, it really freaked you out that, no matter where you went, the moon was right there!”
“I don’t remember any of that!”
He smiled, squeezing one of my toes. “You also had no shoes and one sock when Red brought you in.”
“Was she mad?”
“A bit, not that a quick dip wouldn’t clean out her hair. I think she was more pissed that she had to chase you around camp, wearing all you’ve eaten in the past week. I assured her you haven’t eaten much… you try to watch your figure. She wasn’t amused.”
“Jeez… um…” I looked over at Gia questioningly.
“Yeah, that was a shock. When Red dumped you in my bed, you started telling her how beautiful she was.”
“Red?”
“Gia. You went on for a while and then threw up.”
“Oh no, on Gia?”
“No, no, no.”
“Thank god!”
“On yourself.”
I looked down and realized I was wearing a pink frilled shirt a size too small. “Oh.”
“It’s all we had. Anyway, Gia turned all motherly. Took care of you, long after I went drinking with Red I suspect. When I finally got in, both of you were knocked out.”
“I can’t face anyone.”
“No need, we are off for fame, fortune, yada yada yada, etcetera. We should leave before Gia wakes up. She’s going to do the whole ‘I’m a strong woman, I can fight like you guys’ and ‘Oh, but, Dodger, I love you!’ and honestly, we don’t need that!”
“Shouldn’t we at least say goodbye?”
“People only say goodbye when they plan to die.”
We left mid-day. We had time to pack our supplies and pick up some food at the feeding tent. Stale bread and crackers that we would save for later; I really had no appetite or desire to attempt to hold down food. I nursed a canteen of water like my life depended on it. It didn’t leave my lips for more than a couple of minutes at a time, as I regained my composure. We waded through the streets, aiming for the 23rd Street subway entrance just like I planned. Getting to the cathedral would be a half a day’s journey at the speed we were going. There was no one to bid us farewell. The Tribe spent a majority of their mornings and most of their days hung over or in coma-like sleeps.
We didn’t talk much, which was weird. Dodger always had plenty to say. I wondered if he was upset with me, or disgusted. Either way, it was starting to bother me. Out of all the things I’ve had to endure with him, a small mishap on my part and he starts giving me the cold shoulder? He would yawn as if bored and occasionally cough, his steps were sluggish, the confidence he normally exuded seemed somewhat fleeting now. It wasn’t long before my initial resentment turned to concern.
“Are you okay, did you sleep?” I asked, slowing down to match his pace.
“No, buddy, I couldn’t sleep with you so sick.” He offered me a half-hearted smile, looking down at his feet as he walked. “What kinda best friend would I be?”
“The kind that went drinking instead?” I mumbled loud enough for him to hear.
“Whatever, I was just a couple feet away. I mostly wanted to calm Red down, besides Gia was intent on nursing you back to health like a little pup. Next time, don’t go crazy without me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” There it was again. It always came down to this, as if I were a defenseless animal who couldn’t brave the world without the protection of Dodger’s wing.
“I dunno. I mean you should take care when I’m not around.” He shrugged his shoulders as if it were a simple matter of fact.
“Oh, like what? You’re my protector?”
“No, I mean like, I look out for you and you look out for me. We can count on each other and that’s it.”
“Dodge, I’m not that silly little kid who used to follow you around when we were younger, you know!”
“I never said that.”
“I can take care of myself! I don’t need to feel guilty because you were up all night worrying about me. I didn’t ask you to!”
“Calm down, will ya? I never said any of that. I was just saying you should be careful. You know, I’m the reckless one, you’re the sensible one. God knows the world would crumble if the two of us were reckless.” He gave a halfhearted laugh. There was something about the way he tried to placate me that both angered and worried me. He definitely wasn’t being himself. Could it be the virus? But, selfish as it was, I was too mad about the whole situation to afford him that concern. It was a horrible thing to do. But what can you expect from a stubborn kid who just had his pride shattered and watched the girl of his dreams choose his best friend?
“Just leave it!” I said. “We are at the station. Let’s not draw any unwanted attention to ourselves.”
“Fine.” He shrugged, coughed into the crook of his arm, and led the way down the subway stairs.
We could already feel the humidity as we walked toward the entrance. There used to be turnstiles, which allowed entry with the swipe of a card, now only debris and rubble remained. All painstakingly put into place, leaving only a small entrance, a steel-barred door. It was chained shut, we could see a large padlock on the other side being guarded by an ancient looking man. We’d have to pay the Toll Troll or talk him into letting us in.
His wrinkled face peered through the grating on the side. One eye was glazed over, and his hair was a mess of knots and lice. His skin was a sickly brown, pasty and covered in sweat, and his smile revealed a couple of gold teeth amongst empty sockets.
“Penny for the ferryman.” His voice was a slow death rattle.
“A penny! When’d you lower the price, Toll Troll?” Dodger asked.
“Still the same, just like saying penny for the ferryman.” He laughed or coughed up his insides, it was hard to tell.
“Here’s the thing―” Dodger began.
“There’s always a thing with you boys,” Toll Troll said.
Dodger held up his empty hands. “We don’t have any money.”
“That’s not a surprise.” The Toll Troll yawned. “May I go back to sleep now?”
“Now, listen,” Dodger grabbed onto th
e door’s bars. “We need to get in; it’s kind of a life or death type of thing.”
“Be that as it may, you’d think you would have brought money for the toll,” Toll Troll said.
“We didn’t have time to get our things,” Dodger told him.
“My cancerous heart bleeds for you.” Toll Troll sniffled. “Black blood probably… I dunno, maybe it’d be completely tar by now.”
“There has to be something else.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised if it were tar,” Toll Troll continued. “You know, I can feel my blood trying to surge through my veins, thick and coagulated.”
“Listen!” I said, my patience running low. “We are doing a personal favor for Red, you think she’s gonna take kindly to knowing you didn’t let us in?”
“A favor for her or a favor for yourselves?” he asked. “Gutter Punks, I know the likes. Everyone knows the Empire wants you boys. Why bring all that trouble to my doors?”
“Please, if we paid you, you wouldn’t care a bit!” I pleaded.
“And you never planned to pay, so now I care quite a bit.” He flashed his gold tooth smile once again. We all stared at each other in silence, throwing looks back and forth, impatience, exhaustion, and annoyance, as if we collectively decided the conversation would best be finished telepathically.
“We can just walk to the next station,” I said to Dodger.
“Too far, and we’d have to go through some heavy scavenger territory.”
“And then some,” Toll Troll added. “Most of the stations around here have no entrance, thanks to me!” It sounded like he laughed, or croaked to death. “Had to monopolize the business, so I blew ‘em out, BOOM!”
Dodger broke off into a fit of coughing; he hit the metal door and cursed. I’d never seen him so angry, only for a second, but totally out of character. The light-hearted nature he normally displayed all but vanished. “So what can we do?” He wiped phlegm from his mouth. “I don’t really feel like dealing with this, so why don’t you tell us…you want to sleep with Twist?” He winked at me, and, in an odd way, it was almost comforting, even though I was mad at him. He was so off that day, his one little jibe made me remember how annoying he was.
The Artful (Shadows of the City) Page 8