by Lauren Dane
“I’ve covered your ass so many times in so many ways you’ll owe me favors until the end of time,” Carmella told Craig. “Anyway, everything is fine now. I didn’t want to worry any more people than I already had. It’s just Clifton. It’s not as if I’m shocked he’d rip me off.”
“If I see that weasel around town …”
“Get in line,” Duke said.
“Okay now everyone spit and hitch up your pants,” Carmella said.
“You can make fun all you want. But we don’t know what his motivations are here,” Craig argued.
“He’s smart enough to run some small-time cons, but too lazy to learn the technology to run better ones with lower risk and higher return. So he’s caught in a downward spiral with no real prospects of getting better. He’s not malicious. He’s just pathetic. Yes, I’m mad because he stole from me even after all the times I helped him out in some way. But more than that, I guess I’m just relieved he’s out of my life and I feel sorry for him.”
“You don’t know what the years have done to him. What his circumstances are now. Desperation drives people to do risky stuff,” Duke said.
They were right, she knew. And that was sad too.
“I was thinking,” Duke said as he settled in next to her in bed later that night. “I haven’t taken off more than two days in a row for anything other than work trips in a few years. Want to go out to the coast on the bike? We can stay a few days. What do you say?”
“Yeah. That would be nice. After the grand opening, though.” She wriggled her ass back into the cradle of his hips.
“We can do it before. It’s not like I’m building it. I’m paying someone to do that part. They prefer it when I’m not around, actually.”
“Are you kidding me? They will not take it well if you go on vacation. You’re their buffer between Asa. They love you. They’re always Duke this and Duke that. I’m pretty sure the big one with the neck tattoo has a man crush like whoa on you. I don’t blame him.”
“I don’t even know where you get half the stuff you say.” He kissed the back of her neck.
“I’m gifted. We already talked about that. Remember?” Her voice was sleepy, relaxed. The night before, she’d been a little brittle, but just then she was warm and soft next to him and everything was really okay.
“I remember,” he murmured as he closed his eyes and breathed her in.
“We’ll go to celebrate the grand opening. Besides, the road will be less crowded in the fall.”
On the one hand, he wanted to get her out of town for a while right then. To pick her up, sling her over his shoulder, and run away.
On the other hand, she’d agreed to a trip they couldn’t take for another three or four weeks. Which meant she saw them together then. That was a good sign.
“I guess you have a point. It’s Bumbershoot this weekend. We’re still on for it, right?”
Bumbershoot was the annual end-of-summer live music and arts festival held on the sprawling grounds of Seattle Center. Every type of music imaginable from buskers playing handmade instruments to top-name acts headlining each night.
He and his friends would go all three days and get their fill of music and beer. And this time he would have Carmella along. He smiled in the dark.
“Yes. I can’t wait. I also can’t believe Twisted Steel actually closes Saturday for it. And you give employee-discounted three-day passes. Thanks for that, by the way.”
“Well, it’s Labor Day weekend anyway. Not like we’re out a lot of money.” And people worked twice as hard for you when you treated them well. “We go in with a lot of other shops and buy in bulk to get the discount and some advertising too. It’s all good and really the only time I can eat a hot dog in Seattle without everyone making faces at me or trying to put tuna or ranch dressing on them. Who does that? It’s like the Wild West out here with that shit.”
She started to giggle and soon enough gales of laughter shook her. When she finally settled down, he cleared his throat. “Glad I could amuse you.”
“It’s just that you’re so calm and collected and it’s hot dogs with ranch dressing that you get truly worked up over. Your mind is a scary and wondrous place. I promise to never hot dog shame you. Or put tuna on yours.”
“You got a deal.”
“Can we toast marshmallows? When we go to the coast?” she asked.
“Definitely. Who watches the dog when you go away? Maybe we should drive instead so we can bring her with us.”
“You’re so sweet. I mean, one minute you can be knocking a guy out and the next you’re making me feel better and thinking about my dog. She likes to stay with Craig or my aunt and uncle if I have to be away. But thank you. I feel like I’m bringing you drama and you’re bringing me wonderful. It’s not really a fair exchange.”
He snorted. “Carmella, you bring me a lot. So much happy. This other stuff is stupid. But it’s not your fault. I don’t blame you that your mother is awful. Or that before me, you had shit taste in men.”
“She’s not awful, she’s just … ugh. She just doesn’t know how to love anyone that isn’t him. And to be honest, I see the way she loves him and I don’t want that either. The obsession that turns greedy and selfish. She lives through him and nothing else matters. But she’s not enough for him. And she knows it.”
“But if she stays, isn’t she saying she accepts being not enough? Like living half an existence?” Duke couldn’t imagine accepting that shadow of a life.
“I think she believes she’s not good enough. So she puts all her energy into trying to be better. For him. He’s passive-aggressive. I blame him more than her. I’ve been told that’s unfair.”
“Do you think that’s unfair?” Duke asked.
“Life is unfair. She’s messed up and was before he came into the picture. I’m not kidding myself about who she is. She had a good family. She had roots and she just never grew into them. Her roots are shallow. My grandmother once told me my mother was an African violet. She could only thrive in a very rare set of circumstances. Chances were my mom would never achieve them, so it made her quit at an early age. Like she looked at her life and said, ew, too hard, and just lay down to take a nap.
“But he knows she’s all screwed up and he gets off on it. He should stay away, he knows it. But he comes back because no one makes him feel like she does because she’s all about whatever he needs. It’s toxic but he uses it to get what he wants, and for that, I judge him harsher, yes. She’s mentally ill and he’s just fine manipulating it. Enough. I just need to stop thinking about that for the rest of the night. It’s my horrible underbelly all the time. You tell me something about your life,” Carmella said.
In the dark, after she’d just told him all that about her life, he could do nothing but respond in kind. “Like what?”
“What are your parents like?”
“My father is a shouter. He’s got a baritone voice, and when he wants to, he really gets the volume up. He’s gotten less and less patient over the years. Like the more money he makes, the less tolerance he has for pretty much everything. He started out working in a factory. Making woodstoves. And now he’s the CEO of that company. It’s one of those stories you’d see on cable television. Scrappy blue-collar family rides into California, where everything is golden. Anyway, the yelling. It used to embarrass me so much because you could hear him outside the house, yelling at everyone. My mother convinced him that if he wanted to rise in management, he had to stop being such a vulgar asshole. She said it nicer, I’m sure. It came in handy in the army. Some of those guys you got the feeling they’d never been yelled at ever in their lives. And they’re in basic training and pretty much everyone is yelling all the time and they fall to pieces.”
“Do your siblings yell?”
“My siblings don’t, no. They’re much better bred than my father, you see. My brother is a younger version of the man my dad has been since they moved to California. My sister is very successful, but she married a guy my fath
er keeps employed while my parents pay the mortgage. That way they can disapprove on even more levels because they have a hand in my sister’s finances.”
She remained quiet but he knew she listened to every word.
“So there are some lovely details. But don’t worry, other than them saying they’ll come to the grand opening, you’ll never see them again. I haven’t spent a holiday there in years. I expect I’ll go for various graduations of my nieces and nephews and that sort of thing. Otherwise, my home is here.” And they all seemed fine with that.
She snuggled into him tighter.
“Wow, so really, pill-popping crazy mother isn’t looking that bad next to shouty dad. That CEO thing works in his favor, though.”
She’d known he needed a little levity and gave it to him.
“Maybe that’s why you’re so easygoing. To counter the shouty intensity.”
He’d often thought that was part of his personality. His way to cope early on and it’d stuck.
“Whatever it is, I’m glad home is here but I’m sorry you’re not close with them. I’m sorry they’re missing out on you.”
He had nothing else to say so he held on and let himself glide into sleep, knowing he was understood.
CHAPTER
Twenty-one
Duke pulled a hat from his back pocket and put it on her head. “There.”
She tipped her face to look up at him, clearly amused. “Was this the one thing I was missing in my festival-going ensemble?”
“I live in fear of you getting burned.” She was so pale and the day was already clear and bright. They’d be outside for hours yet.
“I have sunscreen on. Like nuclear blast protection. But I’ll keep the hat too. You have the bill all folded up just right.”
He bent to kiss her, knocking the hat askew. “I like it on you. And the fact that a hot woman is wearing a cap advertising my shop is gravy.” She was adorable. Which he didn’t share because he’d come to find short women had a thing about being called adorable. So he’d only think it.
Duke looked her up and down, pausing to take his time checking out the way her T-shirt clung to her tits. Smart woman that she was, she had sneakers on.
“Should I be afraid of what you’ll do when we’re alone next?” she murmured. “That look of yours usually spells really delicious trouble for me.”
He waggled his brows before pushing his sunglasses up his nose. “I thought it was pretty obvious that I always have delicious trouble waiting for you.”
There was no other word for her smile but dazzling. “Thanks for inviting me today.”
“Thanks for being my date.” He bent to kiss her again because he wanted to and she was his.
“I’ve lived in Seattle my entire life and I’ve never been to any of the big festivals on a date. Not Folklife or even Bite of Seattle.” She shrugged. “You’re my first.”
“You’re my only. So I guess we’re even.”
She slid her hand into his.
“Get a room or get a move on!” Mick called out.
Mick had a friend with a house not too far from Seattle Center so they parked at his place and would walk over to Bumbershoot from there. That way when it was time to leave, they wouldn’t get caught in the snarl right around the area.
Duke flipped him off and stole another kiss before ambling off with their group.
It was crowded, but not nearly as bad as it would be in a few hours. He liked to go all three days to watch the slow build and then ebb as it all ended.
At one time he also loved the sight of so many hot women. Well, he still loved the sight, but none of them held his attention the way the woman at his side did. Still, it would be rude not to smile and nod back. Accept the hug when he saw a friend. Introduce them to Carmella.
He felt like he wanted everyone in the world to see her at his side. Like he’d found the most wonderful, special thing ever.
“Let’s head to the beer garden, see what everyone else is up to, and then decide where to go next,” Mick said. “Stop walking so fast, Carmella’s practically having to run.”
Duke looked down and realized they’d been dragging her through the crowd. “Sorry, gorgeous.”
“I’m used to it.”
They paused on the way to sample a little bit of gamelan from a five-person group in a little grassy knoll and, just around a corner, a ninety-year-old lady playing violin.
“I want to see the big band stuff. It’s on a stage near the Armory in an hour,” Carmella said as they showed their IDs to get into the fenced-off area where their friends waited.
“Okay. I’m in. Sounds good.” Duke looked down at her and got caught up in her smile.
“Mick is going to make a crack if you keep looking at me this way.” The right corner of Carmella’s mouth tipped up and he wanted to lick it.
“He’s just jealous.” They headed over to their friends and he found himself enveloped in hugs, handshakes, and hails of his name.
But he kept hold of her hand until she yanked hard and he turned around and realized that she’d been caught up in his wake.
One handed, he moved the two women who’d somehow gotten between him and Carmella and pulled her through the crowd to his side. “You okay? Sorry about that.”
She straightened her hat and cast a glare over her shoulder at one of the women he’d moved aside.
“There a problem?” he asked quietly.
“Nothing new.” She shrugged and then brightened when she caught sight of PJ and their girlfriends.
It wasn’t the time and she’d hate a scene, but there was a problem and he hated not knowing what was bothering her so he could fix it. Even though he wasn’t supposed to fix everything and just listen or whatever.
She let go of his hand after he kissed hers and went to join the others after he told her he’d get her something to drink that wasn’t beer.
He liked it when the people he cared about were happy. But this was different. She was important on a totally different level. Which was a pretty rad thing when he thought about it.
This being in love thing was pretty fucking awesome.
“You know, I’m just going to put it out there that perhaps you could give the ladies you aren’t dating some space?” Asa handed Duke a beer once they’d cleared the line.
“I need to get a straw for Carmella’s lemonade. Hang on.” He grinned his way around a lovely lady behind him and grabbed a straw and some napkins. They moved to the side. “Now what are you talking about? Ladies I’m not dating?”
Asa sighed, looking annoyed. “Dude, do you have any idea how many women rubbed up on you so far today?”
“I try to accept my blessings and be grateful. I didn’t do anything out of line, Asa. I wouldn’t do that to Carmella even if I wanted to. Which I don’t.” He frowned as he ran through it all.
“Okay then.”
“Okay then? What does that mean?” Duke asked, feeling defensive.
“You know, when you’re not the one giving advice, you’re a pissy crybaby. Jesus.”
“Fuck off.” Duke rolled his eyes at the direct hit.
“Since you’re stupid, let me be clear. You have a girlfriend. I know you’re not used to it and all. But some women don’t dig it when you’re with them and they have to beat off dozens of other women hot for their men. This is what PJ tells me, though that’s really too bad.”
“Has Carmella said something?” He looked over in her direction but she didn’t look upset. She looked happily engaged in conversation.
“Do you really think your girlfriend came to me to complain about the wall of pussy that surrounds you at all times? PJ mentioned it to me yesterday. In an offhand way. I didn’t think much about it until today when we walked in.”
Duke snorted. “Wall of pussy? Don’t you think that’s an overstatement?”
“Yes. And offensive too, I suppose. Don’t tell PJ I said that, though to be fair, that phrase might have come from her. Ignore me if you want.”
>
As they reached their friends, Carmella looked up at him, happy. Clearly she wasn’t bothered by the way his women friends said hello so there was nothing to worry about.
As days went, Carmella thought, this one ranked up there. There she was, twenty-seven years old, and she’d never gone to a concert with a group of friends and the man she was seeing.
It was so much fun. Her cheeks hurt from smiling and laughing all day. And right at that moment she lay on the grass, her back to a tree and Duke’s head in her lap.
So this was why PJ smiled so much. Not just the sex, but the sheer pleasure of having someone along with you. Of your hand in his or the head on a shoulder. She was turning sappy as she approached thirty.
“You sure you don’t need more sunscreen?” Duke asked her. “Your nose is pink.”
“My nose is always pink if I’ve been outside for longer than three minutes. It’s one of my most appealing physical characteristics.”
“You’re on a roll today.” He grinned up at her.
“It’s the day drinking.”
He took her hand, kissing her fingertips. “We should start over to Racha soon so we can meet up with everyone.”
“Oh yes. I forgot we were having dinner there. This is as cool as finding a five in the pocket of an old coat.”
He unfolded himself, all well over six feet, and then helped her up, brushing the grass off her ass really thoroughly. So thoroughly she had to swat him away after a bit.
“I think I’m good,” Carmella said, laughing as she removed his hands.
He patted her butt one last time after she let go. “Yes indeed, you are.”
They headed out of the Seattle Center and just a few blocks away to meet everyone for dinner. The sidewalks were a crush, people heading to a show at Bumbershoot, or from there to one of the many bars and restaurants within an easy walk.
Add the normal hustle of Lower Queen Anne and Carmella had to yank Duke’s hand once already so he would slow down. Finally, he stopped, pulling them off the sidewalk and into a parking lot.