by A. C. Wilson
“Come on. Get your shoes and your coat.” Garrett pushed away from the wall, spurred by the overwhelming emotions he was floundering in and watching Rayne sink under the weight of hers. Her eyes widened at being caught off guard and watched him as if he might sprout wings and fly.
“Why?” It wasn’t the question that stopped him, but the tone. At that moment she sounded like a child, lost and bewildered. Garrett turned to look at her from the kitchen doorway. Her dark hair had fallen close to her face and the shadow was in stark contrast to her pale skin. His palms itched to touch her. He knew that if he gave into the urge, they wouldn’t leave this house and they needed to leave. Now.
“Some fresh air will do us good. We both need clear heads.” He turned on his heel and left the room. Soon he’d snagged his heavy jacket from the peg and was breathing in the cold air outside. He closed his eyes and let the crispness fill his lungs. The sky was as blue as he had ever seen it in the winter. The snow glistened like a mass of prisms. He was glad they weren’t like tiny mirrors for he had no desire to see himself at the moment. It was enough to feel all the things he was and revelations carried enough weight without adding to them. He shook his head, trying to get some clarity. Digging into his pocket, he tugged his cell phone out and punched the speed dial. It rang and he waited.
“Yeah?” His brother’s voice sounded a bit distracted. Garrett furrowed his brow.
“Uh, I need a favor.” Garrett hated asking favors, especially since they came with a price. Matt always collected and the last one he had asked of his little brother had gotten Garrett babysitting for two days. He loved his niece, Harper, but that girl was a handful. Matt groaned and then chuckled.
“What can I do for you?” Matt groaned again and Garrett pulled the phone from his ear to look at the screen.
Four-thirty. Lifting a brow and trying not to laugh at his little brother, Garrett answered.
“Dinner at your house. I know it is short notice, but I have to get Rayne out of this place for a bit.” Garrett adjusted his hat, which had become some sort of nervous twitch. Matt groaned again.
“Uh…um…well,” Matt wasn’t quite able to spit out what he was thinking. “Oh, God.”
Garrett rolled his eyes when his little brother chuckled again. Shaking his head, Garrett laughed at what was happening while they were on the phone.
“If you need a little while longer, I’ll stop and grab some liquor.” There was a moan and then Garrett heard Andy in the background. Shit. He could have done without hearing his sister-in-law singing his brother’s praises. There was a pause before Matt answered Garrett back.
“No, we’re good. See you when you get here.” Matt was out of breath and Garrett hung up the phone. That was certainly something new to be sure! Harper must have been down for a nap. Garrett couldn’t hide the stupid grin on his face when Rayne limped out of the house, crutches in hand.
“What’s so funny?” Rayne ran a hand nervously down the front of her jacket. She thought he was laughing at her. He shook his head and took pity on her.
“My brother has invited us for dinner. He and Andy were in total agreement.”
Agreement? Heck the woman was ready to nominate his brother for sainthood. Garrett stepped forward to help Rayne down the stairs. She eyed him warily. No doubt that answer was a bit suspicious, but he couldn’t quite believe what he had heard with his own ears, let alone explain it to someone else.
“That was nice of them considering I threw them out of my house at lunchtime.” Rayne stared darkly at him as she stood next to the door of his truck. “Maybe I should stay here. Alone.” Her emphasis made him stop and stare into her upturned face. He might have given in if he thought she meant what she said, but the nerve ticking in her cheek gave her away.
“Neither one of us needs to be alone right now.” He reached around her and hooked the door latch. “Besides I think you have made a new friend in Andy and my brother is always good for a laugh.” He took the crutches from her and helped her inside the cab. “We’ll stop for some alcohol. It’ll take the edge off.” He grinned at her as she huffed at him. He had won, but only by a small margin. She was warming to him. Garrett knew he shouldn’t push her buttons too hard. One wrong move and she’d be gone. He closed the door and pondered the question nagging at him.
How do you keep a woman’s armor intact when she clearly had a sign that read “Handle with care”? Thinking his life was infinitely less complicated just a few days ago, Garrett got into the truck and headed for Hot Springs.
Chapter 18
Andy welcomed them into the ranch house, newly refurbished with a renovation to the upstairs for Harper. Matt had spared no expense in doing just as his wife wished and it had resulted in a simple, welcoming plan. The layout was open so anyone in the kitchen could see into the living room. Upstairs was the three bedrooms and Andy’s studio for her photography business. She continued her education all the while selling pictures to the art gallery in town.
“Welcome to our home, Rayne. Come inside.” She waved them in and Garrett allowed Rayne more time to move with the crutches. Poor girl looked like a fish out of water. People interaction really wasn’t her thing. Matt pushed the patio door open from the outside of the house and quickly stepped inside. Tongs in one hand and a plate in the other, Matt grinned first at his brother and then at Rayne.
“Good to you see you both. Steaks will be done in a bit.” Matt met them in the kitchen where he kissed Andy on the cheek. Garrett rolled his eyes when his sister-in-law blushed.
“It was really nice of you to invite us. I’m so sorry about today.” Rayne apologized awkwardly. She struggled with the crutches and finally ceased moving altogether. Andy took pity on her new friend and asked her to come sit in the living room. They moved off as Garrett remained in the kitchen, watching the women talk softly. Matt smacked him on the shoulder with his metal tongs.
“Jerk. What the hell was that for?” Garrett growled, throwing a side glance at his brother.
“Oh come on! You’ve been here less than five minutes and already I can see a change in you.” Matt grinned deviously, clearly enjoying the front row seat to his brother’s whipping.
“Damn it, Matt, keep your voice down.” Garrett growled before turning his back to the living room. “You are the last person I need to explain myself to.” He caught the flash of humor in his brother’s eyes. It wasn’t like Matt needed a reminder of how smitten he was with Andy just after the two of them had met. Heck, it seemed like overnight that boy was caught- hook, line and sinker.
“No, you don’t. You shouldn’t have to anyway. I’m happy for you.” Matt’s genuine sincerity caught Garrett off guard. There was humor there, but pride too perhaps.
“I couldn’t have tied myself to a larger stick of dynamite.” He glanced back out at Rayne sitting on the couch with Andy. “I almost think someone should put me out of my misery, little brother.” His voice was low, his thoughts jumbled, and his future confusing. Matt nodded in understanding.
“It’s something rather unnerving when you realize she has the power to destroy you as well as the power to save you.” Matt offered, his eyes sweeping over his wife at the other end of the room. Garrett pressed his lips into a thin line and nodded. So his brother understood more than he gave him credit for.
“What if there is only misery at the end of this road?” The words were out before he had a chance to pull them back. Swallowing hard, he stared at the gold flecks in the granite countertop. Gold that shined like Rayne’s eyes. His heart clenched in warning. He couldn’t even think of anything but her now.
“Can you see a future without her in it? No matter how painful.” Matt gathered up another plate to put the steaks on. Garrett felt his heart bang mercilessly in his chest. His gut twisted. He nodded his head, not trusting the words that might fall out again. His brother sighed, offering a concerned smile.
“You wonder if you are in love with her.” Matt said gently and looked carefully at his broth
er. “The fact that you can see a future without her is because you’d give her up if she’d ask you too.” Matt tilted his head, moving around the island. Garrett shook his head, disliking the fact his brother had left him hanging in limbo.
“And?” Garrett asked more gruffly than he had meant too. He looked out at the women in the living room to see if they had noticed, but they hadn’t. Matt patted his brother on the shoulder.
“You’re in love with her. It’s something worth fighting for.” Matt moved across the room to the patio door without looking at his brother. If he had turned around, he would have seen a perplexed and shocked look on Garrett’s face. Garrett didn’t like the feeling at all.
“So Rayne tells me that Scott Valentine came to visit with you both today?” Andy asked, her green eyes absorbing Garrett’s distraction. When he finally focused on what she was asking, his intuitive sister-in-law had read all she needed too. He swallowed hard and nodded. Thinking a beer might be a good idea, he shifted towards the fridge and snagged one.
“That rat is up to something. I just have no idea what yet.” Garrett shared, his words harsh. Rayne remained on the couch, but she was listening to the conversation.
“All I know is he gives me the creeps. Every time I see him, I swear he looks as if he is picturing me naked.” Andy bugged her eyes out in horror and turned away when the oven timer beeped. Rayne nodded from her seat and Garrett tried not to think about Andy naked. It was more than enough knowing she and Matt were having sex while Garrett was on the phone with his brother earlier.
“I realize that you grew up around here, Garrett, but it just seemed like you knew Valentine a bit better than most might.” Rayne asked, her arm draped over the sofa arm. He knew that question would come up sooner or later. He was hoping for later. He took a long drink of his beer and thanked his stars when Matt came back in from outside.
“Wow! It is so cold. I’m not grilling outside again until the snow melts. Preferably after the robins return.” Matt grimaced as he shut the glass door quickly. Andy grinned at her husband.
“The steaks smell wonderful, honey.” Andy took the plate from him and placed it on the dining room table. She’d already put out salad, au gratin potatoes, and some rolls. “Oh, Garrett could you grab the bowl of green beans up there?”
Garrett nodded and picked up the bowl before heading for the table himself. His stomach growled in anticipation. He missed home cooked meals. Of course it always tasted better when someone else cooked them too. Rayne gingerly took her seat as Matt held it out for her. Andy seated herself across from Rayne and Matt sat next to his wife. Clearly that only left an empty seat next to Rayne.
“Rayne wasn’t overly impressed with my cooking skills.” Garrett offered as he sat down. Andy smiled at Rayne’s nervous giggle. Garrett grinned.
“You were acting like the bacon grease was attacking you.” Rayne smiled, her eyes brightening. “I was afraid by the time you were finished with the bacon, there would be nothing but ash.”
“Ha! I know exactly what you mean!” Matt half shouted from the fridge where he had stuck his head in for a beer. Holding the longneck, glass bottle, Matt chuckled at the dirty look he got from his brother.
“Oh, like you have room to talk, Matt.” Andy admonished before slipping a serving spoon into the green beans. Her husband didn’t say anything else, but the heated gaze and Andy’s reddening cheeks were enough to offer suggestion of their internal conversation. Garrett envied that easiness. With Rayne, there always seemed to be some distant emotion that pulled her away from the present. He wasn’t certain she could be present in the here and now. Garrett stabbed a steak off the pile and busied himself with filling his plate. Everyone else was doing the same. For a good portion of the time, the quiet was easy and it was just about being together. The smokiness of the steaks, the sweetness of the green beans and the soft cheese of the potatoes were worthy of his immediate attention.
“So, Rayne, Matt told me that you moved to the Black Hills when you were a young child. Where did your family come from?” Andy asked between bites of food. Garrett felt alarming prickles crawl up his back. His eyes flicked to see Rayne stiffen, but not back away. Garrett had a new pride for his sister-in-law. Andy had a way of insinuating her life into a person’s life.
“It’s true. I wasn’t born in South Dakota. My parents came from Texas.” Rayne took a small bite of her potatoes before going on. “It was my father’s dream to build a ranch in South Dakota, so he packed us up and moved us out here.” Rayne offered a soft, sad smile to Garrett before taking a bite of her steak. Garrett applauded her willingness to be open about such a painful subject.
“It wasn’t your mother’s dream to live here too?” Andy asked, her green eyes watching carefully for the moment when she’d be shut down. Garrett had expected it long before now, so when Rayne’s face whitened, he figured it was all over.
“I remember her being happy there. She loved horses and being outdoors. We had a huge garden that was half vegetables and half wild flowers. If she wasn’t in the house, she was out there weeding, watering, or just sitting there.” Rayne’s pensiveness furrowed her brow. Garrett hung on every word she spoke. Rayne pushed her food around her plate.
“She sounds like a wonderful mother.” Andy said, encouraging the line to remain open. Much to Garrett’s surprise, it did. It was a fragile tendon that could be severed at any time, but so far, the barbs of the past hadn’t managed to do that.
“I do remember that there were weeks before her death, she could be found mostly in the garden. One night I went looking for her and the stars were already very visible in the sky. She was sitting on a wooden bench my father had made for her and I sat beside her.” Rayne looked down into the gloss of the table, but she was seeing the past as clearly as if it were yesterday. Garrett absorbed everything. Andy and Matt exchanged a concerned glance and maintained their easy demeanor. “You know, she told me that she loved listening to the plants grow. She told me that life is made up of little moments and that the journey is the treasure while the destination is merely a consequence.” Rayne struggled with the memories that sprang forth unbidden.
“She was right. We are defined by the little moments and the treasures we pick up along the way. People can be our treasures too.” Andy said, her eyes darkened with understanding and regret. Some people obviously didn’t stay. They couldn’t for whatever reason, but their footprints remained.
“I believe I have forgotten how to live.” Rayne’s voice could barely be heard, but Garrett heard it. His heart cracked a bit more as he watched her sitting there, admitting that life was fleeting. He took a deep breath and handed her his beer. Andy and Matt looked at him as if he were crazy, but Rayne just smiled and took a long drink. They all went back to eating, but each person at that table had been changed by what was spoken.
After several beers, Rayne’s clouds seemed to have disappeared for a while. They reminisced about high school and then college. Rayne was surprised to know that Garrett had completed his business degree at Chadron State College via the internet courses. Clearly she didn’t think he had the discipline to tackle such a feat. Matt and Andy joked about how they had met. Matt recited how he had found Andy and Harper sitting in the hallway of his friend’s apartment building, both crying as if the world would end. Matt was gifted a grimace from his wife and he playfully patted her hand. Garrett had more than enough time to observe the intimacy and tenderness of the couple. When he wasn’t put off by their willingness to share their love publicly, he felt a certain pride for them. They represented the ability to have such a relationship and thrive from it.
“So where have you sent Harper tonight?” Garrett asked when they caught him being quiet. Matt grinned and Andy blushed.
“She’s with your parents.” Andy offered. Matt chuckled while his wife shook her head slightly.
“Mom was more than happy to keep Harper. It’s the only way they are getting more grandkids.” Matt was kicked under the tabl
e and he furrowed his brows as he rubbed his throbbing shin. Garrett couldn’t help but laugh. Glancing at Rayne out of the corner of his eye, he noticed her rather absorbed in peeling the label off her beer bottle.
“Be careful, brother, or you might find yourself on the couch tonight.” Garrett grinned and Andy nodded her head in agreement. It was obvious that would never happen, but Matt’s face was priceless. The conversation went a bit stale after that. Rayne remained quietly focused on whatever was internally eating at her. Andy and Matt shared a look. Matt caught Garrett’s eye to nod in Rayne’s direction. Pressing his lips together, Garrett wondered what he could say. All of a sudden he felt incredibly tongue tied and that uncomfortableness didn’t sit well.
“Well it’s getting a bit late and I think we are going to call it a night.” Matt said, yawning to underscore his speech. Andy smiled softly and nodded, scooting her chair out. Rayne snapped back to the present.
“Oh, sure. We should go.” She pushed her chair back, but standing seemed to be a bit of a problem. Four beers later and gravity pulled heavily at her. She wavered just as Garrett secured an arm around her waist.
“You could stay here for tonight. The couch pulls out if you should need it.” Andy offered, concern etching her face. They had all noted the beers, but hadn’t said anything.
“Garrett knows where the extra pillows and blankets are.” Matt added, a cheeky grin on his face. Garrett shook his head at his brother and Rayne raised a brow.
“You’ve stayed overnight here?” Rayne asked Garrett, her golden eyes a bit clouded by the alcohol.
“A time or two.” Garrett lowered his eyes, adjusting his arm around her. She leaned into him.
Perhaps it isn’t such a bad idea to stay here for a while. Garrett sighed as Andy and Matt exited the downstairs. He could hear their playful banter as they went up the stairs. A tiny flicker of jealousy smoldered in his veins at the easiness of his brother’s relationship.