by Lily Zante
I’ve got some more work for you, if you’re interested
She was interested, and replied:
I can come over on my way back from college
You know where to find me
He texted back. And then she remembered she hadn’t even asked him about his car.
How’s your car?
Been replaced, will show you later. Gotta go
Later that afternoon, once she had explained the reason for her absence to her college tutor, and managed to get the notes for everything she had missed, she jumped on the subway.
A part of her felt slightly on edge. She wasn’t sure how to be around Xavier, not after the last time. Things might have been different if she’d seen him the next day, after that evening, but a lot had happened since then and everything between them seemed new again, at least it did for her.
It would be awkward.
“I can’t stay long,” was the first thing she said, when she walked in. Because as soon as she walked into his apartment, she was reminded of what Cara had told her, that the kind of place he lived in must have come with a multi-million dollar price tag.
People like Xavier had no clue about the types of pressures people like her were under. Life wasn’t fair. Some had it easy, and some didn’t and some, like her father, had tried to do better and had been cheated out of building a better life by someone who probably hadn’t been too different to the Stones.
“Oh-kay,” he said slowly. She could tell by the way he looked at her that he was puzzled by her demeanor. “How’s your dad?”
“Better.” A part of her wished she hadn’t told him. Wished he’d been as ignorant as Cara.
“Better?” He looked at her, as if he could see through her hesitation.
He had his hands in the back pockets of his jeans. All the previous times she’d seen him he’d normally worn a hoodie and sweatpants at home. Today he was in jeans and a t-shirt, and she wondered if he was going out, because he usually didn’t look so smart for working at home.
“Because you had me worried there, rushing home like that,” he told her. She walked towards his huge windows and stared out.
“You shouldn’t have worried. He’s fine.” She stared out of the windows at the views over a park. It was a stunning view. A multi-million dollar view, from a multi-million dollar apartment. It must be wonderful to wake up and have the city and its sunshine streaming in. It was a stark contrast to their windows, a fraction of the size of these, overlooking a street with broken street lamps, and the sound of police sirens which penetrated the silence at least once a day.
He was leaning against the brickwork, his shoulder resting against the wall, and with one foot over the other. He looked relaxed and casual. As if he didn’t have a worry in the world.
“Are we good, Izzy?”
She looked at him, not completely understanding why she felt the way she did. Why coming back from home, from dealing with her father, had suddenly made her feel a touch of hostility towards Xavier.
She had to forcibly remind herself that he wasn’t like the others. “I’m sorry. I got back late last night, I’m a little tired, and cranky, that’s all.”
That seemed to please him, made his mouth turn up into a smile, and then she saw the twitch in his jaw. A tiny little movement that told her that maybe she hadn’t totally convinced him.
“You’re not regretting what happened the other day, are you? Because I’m not.”
Trust him to allude to that straight away. “The other day,” she said, raising her hand to move her bangs away from her face. “That was … that was … something unexpected.”
And he was putting her on the spot. She couldn’t come back from that darkness with her father and step into the light with Xavier. “Your car,” she said, turning to face him, and relieved to have something neutral to talk about. “Did the insurance pay out?”
He didn’t seem to like it, the way she’d casually moved away from discussing them. “I bought something safe and sensible like you recommended. A runaround.”
“You listened to me?”
“Believe it or not, I listen to you more than I listen to most people.”
His words made her smile. “What did you get?”
“A BMW.”
She almost choked in shock. “You’re calling a BMW a runaround?” Their worlds couldn’t be further apart.
“It’s safe and sensible, you can’t argue with that.”
“I was thinking maybe you’d get something like a Ford.”
“Can you see me in a Ford?” he asked, grinning. “I mean, that is so not me.”
No, a Ford wasn’t Xavier at all.
She started to melt, then. Started to ease slowly. It had been a huge switch, going home and dealing with everything there, and then to come here and be with Xavier, but he had a way of making her feel better, and that was what she needed after the draining few days she’d had back home.
Chapter 39
Had he missed something? The way they had left things the last time, made it seem like this was a different person in front of him.
He was careful not to touch her, or get close, because he could read the signs straightaway, and he’d seen how she had been careful not to look at him, how she’d looked out of the windows. And yet she was here. She could have turned him down and said no. It had to count for something.
Technically, he could have emailed the extra work to her, but he’d wanted an excuse to see her.
With Izzy, he always had to think of reasons to call her, or text her, he was never as sure as he was with other girls.
She was like a jigsaw puzzle, and he had never been good at them. He wanted instant gratification, and had never been one to take his time figuring things out. That was the difference between him and Tobias. Tobias was all about the long game, strategy, watching and observing, and analyzing. Him? Not so much.
“Are you okay?” he asked, as she gazed out again. He hadn’t been expecting her to fall into his arms, but he hadn’t expected her to be as distant.
“I am,” she insisted, then explained it on getting home late. “So, you said you had more work for me?”
“Plenty to keep you busy. You can do the weekly figures for another one of my companies, if you want the work.”
“What’s the matter? One of your virtual assistants let you down?”
Her abruptness caught him off guard.
“No. I thought you might like the extra work, on account of you missing time off school and going home.” He had plenty of work, and he could easily give her more hours to do, if she needed it.
He’d do whatever it took, which, right now, seemed to be the way to get through to her.
She looked tired, and aggravated, and as pissed off as hell.
He walked up to her and resisted the urge to touch her face. They’d made out a few days ago, for fuck’s sake. “What’s wrong? You look like the entire world just pissed you off.”
“Maybe it did.”
He knew it was something. “Was it going home? Seeing your folks?”
“Something like that.”
“Then tell me.”
“Why? Will you fix it for me?”
He moved his head back in surprise. There was a reason why he didn’t talk so much to girls before he fucked them. It was easier that way. They came with less baggage when all they wanted was to come. Or to be seen with a Stone.
With Izzy he felt as if he was caught in a riptide of emotions, swirling and whirling and pulling him under, and now he was caught up in the current of their attraction. But she screwed with his mind, and it was impossible for him to hold onto the edge and stop himself from going under.
He wanted more of this girl, and sometimes he wondered if the headfuck was worth it. He didn’t do emotional stuff well. It was all physical with him. And Izzy was driving him insane. He was losing control because she was so unavailable.
And yet the other night everything had changed. He’d had his first gl
impse that maybe this girl wanted him. That maybe she didn’t truly believe he was an asshole. But at times like now, he wanted to walk away because it would make for an easier life. He didn’t care about the bet anymore. That no longer mattered, but he wanted to walk away because it would be the easy thing to do.
No mind games, no stress, no emotional baggage.
And yet, he couldn’t.
It wasn’t even because he’d kissed her, or wanted to touch her, or wanted to get to know her. It was because he cared about her. She was hurting about something else, this was new, this wasn’t about that creep—so help him god he wanted to find the guy and kick him in—this was something to do with going home, and he wanted to know so he could make it better.
“Are you going to fix it for me?” she asked, again, in a half-jokey, half-serious voice
“I’ll do what I can.” He seized her arm. “If you’ll let me.” She was still in her thick coat and tried to pull away, but he wasn’t going to let her go, as easily as that.
“Your dad’s ill, and I get that you’re worried. Sharing a worry is better than keeping it all to yourself.”
She looked at him. “It’s so easy for people like you,” she said, pulling her arm away again, but he held onto it firmly. “Can I take my coat off?
He let go, and watched as she walked over to the couch and took it off, then left it there.
“People like me?” he asked, repeating her words, and walking over.
“You and Sh—” she stopped herself. “That creep, the people who tread all over other people.”
She’d almost said his name. Puzzled, he walked over and sat down beside her.
“You told me about your father. Did he have another episode?” Clearly something had happened. Maybe he’d gotten laid off. He reached for her hand. “Izzy? Or is this about that guy? The creep?”
“No,” she replied, sounding weary. “I shouldn’t have come here. I’m not in the right frame of mind. This isn’t fair on you, me taking my bad mood out on you.” She got up, as if to go.
He stood with her. “Don’t go. Don’t run away, Izzy. Tell me.” It was taking all his might not to get angry, and if it took all day, he was going to get to the bottom of this. “That night you let me kiss you, and hold you, I didn’t want to leave.” She flinched when he reminded her, and her cheeks turned pink. “I wanted to stay with you, and do so many things to you.”
The way her lips tightened, he knew he was getting through to her. “But I made myself leave, and you know why?”
“Why?”
“Because I want to take things slow, at least that’s what I tell myself, but if I was being honest, it’s because I’m scared of doing the wrong thing, and not having your approval. That’s right,” he said, when the expression on her face changed to one of surprise. “Your fucking approval is what I’m looking for. So don’t compare me to that sleazy son of a bitch who messed around with you. You think you’ve got me all figured out, and I can tell you that you don’t. You don’t know the real me.”
“What is the real you?”
“Not the womanizing asshole you seem to think I am.”
“No?”
Maybe not so much now. Hell, no. He hadn’t fucked a woman for months, and he could have. But that stupid bet got in the way, and now he didn’t even care about it.
“I don’t know what’s happened to you since then, or why you’re so mad, or so down, or why you hate me so much, but unless you tell me what it is, I can’t help you, and for the few times in my life, I actually care about you enough to want to make things better for you.”
“My dad,” she said, speaking up. “Has felt like a failure for so many years now, mostly from when I was in my teens, at least, that’s how I remember it. And it wasn’t even his fault. People like you get away with so much.”
He frowned, but knew when to keep quiet.
“Maybe not people like you.” She was quiet then, as if choosing her words. “But it seems to me that the little people don’t always win.” She looked at him. “You don’t understand, do you?”
“Then make me understand.”
“You know I told you about my dad feeling like he’d failed us all?”
“When his business when downhill?”
“It wasn’t his fault it failed.”
“What happened?”
“He had a construction company, and it was doing well. I know that because when we were little, we lived in a big house when we were growing up, and we’d go on nice vacations. And then it all changed suddenly. Like almost overnight. And it was all because of one man.”
“A competitor?”
She shook her head. “He got a big contract from this so called multi-millionaire businessman who wanted to build a huge block of condos. It was going to be a new estate, and then hopefully lead to other projects, at least, that’s why my mom told us, because my dad refuses to talk about that time. It was my dad’s biggest and most ambitious project to date. His friends warned him not to do it, they said that the guy was an asshole, not someone to be trusted, but my dad said everyone deserved a chance, and he liked to make his own mind up about people. So he met with the guy lots of times, decided to take on this project.” She stared down at her skirt, her forehead creasing. “To cut a long story short, the guy didn’t pay up. My dad had paid for all the materials, because he never dreamed this guy would ever pull something like that. He trusted him. He trusted him because he looked trustworthy. He looked legitimate.”
“He didn’t pay a dime?”
“He came with his henchmen and paid only the bare minimum, and after my father couldn’t afford to pay the mortgage on his own home, they took our house away.”
“And your dad never sued him?”
She shook her head, and told him how things had deteriorated fast. And in the end, the guy had sent a bunch of heavies to a meeting with her father and his management team, and refused to pay, citing that they’d had enough publicity.
“And that was it? He never thought to sue them?”
“No. The guy was untouchable. He was rich, like really rich, and my mom was scared, she worried that he might do something if my dad went up against him. And-uh,” she scratched her wrist, her forehead lining as if it was too painful to think about. “He gets down about it. It’s worse in the winter, though.” She looked up, her expression touching a nerve in him, and it made sense, her wariness, her hatred and contempt for people like him.
He moved closer and entwined his fingers around hers and when she didn’t pull her hand away, he said, “We’re not all the same people, Izzy. I’m sorry for what happened to your dad. I really am.”
It would kill him slowly, inside, if something like that happened to him. He could see how failing bigtime, in a company you had put your heart and soul into, only to have it be ruined by an unscrupulous investor, could be so dangerous. It was obvious to see how something like that had taken a toll on her dad, and his family, even now, years later.
No wonder she seemed down, and subdued.
He lifted her hand and dropped a soft kiss on the back of it. “I can see why you’re so upset.”
“I’m not upset. I’m used to it. I just get sad when I think of him, but …,” She drew in a breath. “It’s nice to be able to offload on you.”
He liked that she thought so. “Offload on me anytime.”
“I haven’t even told any of my friends, not even Cara.
“Cara doesn’t know?” She trusted him more than she trusted her friend?
“No.”
He rubbed her hand gently. “You don’t need Cara, you’ve got me.”
She smiled.
“Want something to eat?” he asked. He assumed she was probably hungry.
“No, thanks. I should go.”
No, dammit. She’d only just arrived.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have asked you to come over. I’m sorry. I should have emailed you the extra work. Truth is, I wanted to see you. The work was just an excu
se.”
She looked up at him. “An excuse?”
“I had to think of some way of getting to see you again. I’ve missed you.”
“You did?”
He nodded. He wanted to kiss her. Had never had to think about it before. Usually, he knew within seconds what he wanted, and he claimed it, and with the types of girls he dated, it had been something he’d had to think twice about.
Izzy was barbed wire and roses.
He had to think twice about anything with her. It wasn’t about the sex anymore, it wasn’t about getting physical because he needed the release, it was about her. He didn’t want to rush things, or move too fast, and most of the time, with Izzy, he wasn’t even sure where he stood.
The sands were always shifting in these initial getting-to-know-you stages, and he was in no rush.
“I’m glad I came over,” she said.
At least he’d managed to get a smile out of her.
Chapter 40
It was unfair, taking it out on him, and he was being nice. He was actually listening to her and trying to help. He wasn’t Shoemoney, or that dirty businessman.
“Come on,” he said, when she had told him she wasn’t hungry. “It’s easier if I show you the type of extra work you can do, if you want.”
She followed him to his office area where he showed her the spreadsheets on his computer. “Is this something you could take on?”
“What about your VA who does this?”
“She’s messed me about a few times. You could do a better job of it, and you’re nearby, and its similar to what you’ve done for me before. It’s just another one of my sideline businesses.”
“How many do you have?”
“Lots. Lots of little things, some work, some don’t.”
“Risky.”
“Entrepreneurial.”
Nothing like Tobias’s hedge fund.
“I’ve realized that having someone local, as opposed to in another country, is more helpful to me. Do you want the extra work?”