by Naomi Wyatt
My voice bounced off the walls and caused her to jump slightly. But I knew just how fucking pathetic she was when she kept sucking nonetheless.
I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her until she lost balance on her knees. As she hit the floor, I stood and stepped over her, pulling my jeans up along the way.
“Fuck you!” she spat.
I looked at her, wearing a taunting grin. “That’s what you wanted to do. But I don’t fuck the help.”
She literally gasped as she fought to stand on her feet. “You bastard!”
On cue, at the first sign of trouble, Gabe appeared in the doorway.
We locked eyes and he knew that I wasn’t able to go through with it. Like all the other women that had thrown themselves at me for the past month, no one could catch my eye or change my heart like Baby.
I stared out of the window, out onto Lake Michigan, fighting the urge to jump through the glass. I was not myself without Baby, and I would never be the same. “Take her home.”
“Take me home?!” Her squeaky voice filled that air like nails. “You asshole!”
I didn’t move. I couldn’t. I could not let her or Gabe see the hurt in my face or the tears forming in them, which were even surprising me. “TAKE HER HOME, GABE!”
The venom in my voice was enough to silence her antics. I could hear Gabe ushering her out of the room. As the door closed behind him, my hands went to my face, forcing my tears away.
Present day…
Chapter 20
Rocco de Michele
I had a choice when Baby walked out of my family’s mansion; either chase after her or chase after Robert to find out who was behind putting her in danger. Everything in me didn’t want to let Baby go, but protecting her was more important than protecting myself from the heartbreak of watching her leave me again. So, I let her leave and allowed Gabe to lead me to where this kid was.
He was essentially a homeless kid. Gabe had driven me to a viaduct on a side street in downtown Chicago. There were about ten teens, huddled in a circle. I could smell the weed and heroine in the air. I spotted Robert right away. He was the only Italian amongst them, and though his skin was dirty and full of soot, I could see the Italian features behind the dirt.
All of the kids looked at us curiously as we approached them. But two men that exuded money and power left them more curious than afraid, so none of them ran away.
“Robert, come here.” I was pissed and ready to get straight to the point. It was taking everything in me to focus on the task at hand, and not the task of getting Yanna back. So, I had very little patience.
He walked towards us. Again curiosity outweighed any fear in this kid. He walked towards us as if he didn’t have a care in the world. But his tattered tank top and shorts told otherwise. If DNA didn’t prove that he was who robbed my house, the bandage on his legs that most likely covered the wounds from being shot told that he definitely was.
“I’m going to ask you one time and one time only; who hired you rob the house in Hyde Park?”
It took no convincing, threats, or physical harm to get this kid to sing like a bird, and what he told me shocked the hell out of me to say the very least. Gabe and I stood with eyes the size of golf balls as he ran the whole orchestrated plan down to us. But, at the end, he continued to linger as we thanked him for his cooperation. I knew what he wanted for his help, so I dug in my pockets and gave him everything that was inside. It was worth it, because the information that he’d just told me was priceless and proved what a dumbfuck this idiot was that had chosen to attempt to come against me.
****
“Rocco!”
My mother was alarmed as I charged through the mansion, barking like a mad dog.
“Rocco! Rocco de Michelle! What is wrong with you?!”
I ignored her broken English as I charged up the steps towards the second floor. I could hear Gabe downstairs, attempting to soothe my mother as I went straight for the guest bedroom.
“ROC!” Tia squealed, attempting to cover her body with a towel. She had obviously just finished showering. Her skin was still wet. But I invaded her privacy as I charged through the bedroom door. “What the f–”
“SHUT UP!” I was two seconds from wrapping my hands around her neck and taking her fucking life. “You hired that kid to scare Yanna?!” As soon as the question left my lips, her shoulders shrank and her eyes floated away from mine, telling me everything.
Robert told me that he’d gotten a visit from a dealer that he scored from a few weeks ago. He had a job for him in exchange for money, which he knew Robert couldn’t afford to say no to. His cousin in Florida needed a woman ran out of town. Apparently, as soon as Tia found out that she would be moving to Chicago, she put her plan in motion to get rid of Baby. At least the dipshit had sense enough to order that she only be scared away and not killed, but a mistake could have happened that caused Baby her life, so I was angry enough to take hers at the moment.
“You sick bitch! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” I was nearly on top of her, barking as she cowered beneath me.
“Rocco, ciò che è sbagliato con te!” I could hear my mother behind me, chastising me. I could feel her pulling on my shirt, attempting to stop me. But I could see nothing but red as I tried to remind myself how disappointed my mother would be if I hurt a woman. “Smettila subito!”
“You get the fuck out of town right now… if you want to live to see another day. I can’t hurt you, but I have a few capos with sisters that will do anything for me.”
Tia’s eyes withered, as if she couldn’t believe that I would do such a thing.
I reiterated myself through gritted teeth. “Don’t fucking underestimate how crazy I am.”
“What is going on?!” By now, my mother was frightened and scared to the point that her voice was shaking.
I didn’t take my condemning eyes off of Tia as I told my mother, “She hired some kid to ambush Yanna, to shoot at me, to ransack my fucking house.”
My mother gasped as she stared disappointedly at her. “Tia!”
Holding the towel around her shivering body, she explained to my mother, “I was just trying to scare her away!”
My mother watched her, now looking at Tia just as I was; like she was fucking pathetic. “Did Jaime know about this?!”
My eyes widened in anticipation of her answer.
But she replied softly, “No.”
I could see the relief in my mother’s eyes as she asked Tia, “Why would you do something like this?! They could have gotten hurt.”
“Because he should be with me!” she snapped. “All these years I wanted you and you pushed me away like I was trash–”
“Because you are trash!”
“And she isn’t?! I’m no better than your precious Baby?!” She looked repulsed as she said her name. “This life isn’t for her, Roc. I figured that now that I live here in Chicago, I can show you how good we can be together, but you would have never seen it as long as she was around.”
I couldn’t take this psychobabble any longer. “Get the fuck out of town… or else.”
I left her there, with the fear of God in her eyes as she cowered under that towel. I knew she would leave; there was no doubt about that.
Gabe was at the doorway as I stormed by. “Let’s go. We have things to do.”
Chapter 21
Yanna E. Hill
Surprisingly, after storming out of the de Michele estate, Roc only called twice. I ignored both calls because I was too upset to talk, as I lay in the guest bedroom of my grandmother’s house crying my eyes out.
I was so tired of feeling like Roc’s problem. Sure, he loved me; that was no secret. But for five years he’d been distant and fighting with his father and sister because he chose to love me. Though he and his father weren’t close, I knew that he hadn’t married me because he wouldn’t have the support of his entire family. No matter how much he loved me, there was no love strong enough to keep me in a position where I was co
nstantly reminded that I wasn’t good enough.
“Madea, aren’t you tired?” We had been walking this mall for hours. She’d woke up bright and early this morning and asked me to take her to breakfast and then to run errands and do some shopping. That was almost ten hours ago. I knew what she was doing. She was trying to keep me busy and my mind off of Roc, but, goodness, I was tired!
“Sure, sweetie,” she said with a smile as she slipped her cell phone back into her purse. “I’m done. I have shopped until I dropped, literally.” Then she giggled.
Good! I thought as we headed out of the Macy’s with her arm in mine. But I honestly feared going back to her house to face my reality. I was sure of how I felt, but it hadn’t even been twenty–four hours and I already missed Roc’s smell. I missed his touch last night as I slept outside of our home for the first time in years without him. Yearning tugged at my heartstrings as Madea and I filled my trunk with our shopping bags. I literally cannot remember what we talked about as I drove us back to her home. I merely responded robotically with “Mmm humph,” as thoughts of Roc filled my mind.
The scene in the bathroom played over and over again in my mind, along with every other insult those people had thrown at me. Pulling up in front of Madea’s brownstone in Oak Lawn, I literally felt incomplete. For five years, I thought that I had finally found happiness. I thought that Roc was it. I thought that I was in the midst of my happily ever after. I no longer expected to feel heartbreak, but here I was, heartbroken and literally sick to my stomach.
“ROC!” He scared the shit out of me. Imagine walking into your grandmother’s house to see 6’4” of muscles and tattoos sitting on the couch. “What are you doing here?! How did you get in here?!”
I looked at the front door. Though I had clearly just used my key to open it, I thought that Roc must have broken his way in. But there was no damage to the door and as I looked at Madea, I noticed a guilty expression in her eyes.
“Did you know he was here?!”
She pierced her lips. She could never lie to me, and she probably felt like crap for deceiving me, so I calmed down and took a deep breath.
With a gentle hand on my back, Madea urged me, “Talk to your man, honey.”
Timidly, I walked into the living room. It was obvious that Roc was angry. So angry that I wondered if he was that mad at me for walking out on him or if something had happened.
As I stood in the entrance of the living room, a few feet away from him, my mouth opened and closed, but I couldn’t figure out the right words to say. I knew how adamantly I felt about constantly feeling like his problem, but watching him made me so damn weak that I was again willing to be the thorn in the side of the de Michele family.
Before I could muster up the right words to say, those beautiful eyes lifted and peered at me from under his fitted cap. “You promised to never leave me again.”
2010
Chapter 22
Rocco de Michele
“Rocco, aspetta. Ho bisogno di parlare con te, figliolo.”
I stopped in my tracks on the steps as I heard my mother asking me to wait because she needed to talk to me. I was more than happy to do so. I had arrived at the estate a few moments ago because my father called me in a frenzy, threatening my existence if I didn’t get my ass over here immediately. I knew that Tia had reported to her father how I treated her the night before. Though I was sure that she had left out the part where I was balls deep her in mouth. Needless to say, I was sure that a threatening call from the Governor of Florida hadn’t left him that happy.
I followed my mother into the kitchen. She was getting older, so her walk had become a lot slower. Along the way, I held her hand. It was tiny inside of mine. She smiled along the way and I knew that that small gesture had made her day.
“Sit down, son.” Her thick accent spoke broken English as she pointed toward the stool along the island. I did as I was told as she went towards the stove to check on what smelled like her signature marinara sauce.
“Isn’t Yanna’s graduation today?”
My heart cried as she forced me to think about it for the millionth time that day.
I cleared my throat, in order to swallow the huge lump in it. “It is.”
“You still haven’t talked to her.”
“Is that a question or–”
“A statement. I know that you haven’t by the look in your eyes. They’re still empty.”
I grimaced behind her back and lowered my cap over my eyes.
“Your sister and father want you to marry traditionally… like your father and I. Your father and I were forced to marry. He needed a wife in order to gain his status before moving to America. I know the burden of being forced to marry someone that you don’t love…” She then turned and looked at me square in the eye. Chills ran down my spine as I saw so much truth in her aging eyes. “Tracy and I are friends. I know the Hills. Though not a connected family, they are a good family. I want you to spend your life in love, and I don’t care who she is… Your father can deal with me.”
She smiled through the tension in the room, and I forced myself to smile as well.
“Now, go talk to your father and see what nonsense he has to say. He’s very upset with you.”
Now, it wasn’t so hard to smile. “Isn’t he always?”
Then we both broke out in giggles and chuckles as I left the stool and the kitchen.
I ascended the stairs with my mother’s words ringing in my ears and yearning for Yanna in my heart. For a month, I had allowed her to ignore me, assuming that our unconditional love would eventually bring us back together. I had tamed my beast, not allowing myself to hunt her down and drag her back into my life.
But time was up for that.
“Did you really push Tia away?” As soon as I entered his office, there was nothing but stones being thrown my way. Before I could even respond, he continued shooting daggers at me. “I asked you to do this one thing for me. One thing, Rocco! You’ve always been against me! Why is it so hard for you to cooperate with this family?”
More than his harsh words, I saw desperation in my father’s eyes that I actually pitied. He wanted that money more than he wanted my own happiness.
However, he mistook the pity in my eyes as me being apologetic. “Her father convinced her to give you another chance.”
“Pops–”
“You need to seriously consider her. Not just for a favor for me. With her by your side, you’ll have the respect of everyone, of all the families–”
“I already do–”
“You will run this country when I’m gone.” He continued his attempt to convince me as he rounded his desk and stood in front of me. “She is good for you. Better for you. Just listen to me for one time in your life, son.”
His eyes widened as I reached for him. I actually saw concern of what I would do before I embraced him, saying, “Fuck you, Pops.”
“Wow.” He shook his head as he looked me in my eyes with disappointment. “That fucking girl has you drinking the Kool–Aid. The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice, huh?”
A threatening smirk spread across my face as I gripped his shoulder. “No, Pops. The blacker the berry, the sweeter the pussy.”
I would have laughed at the insult all over his expression, but I was too focused on the next task at hand.
I had a graduation to crash.
Yanna E. Hill
I was standing in the procession line, waiting for my name to be called. I kept looking back at my family; my brothers, my mother, Madea, Tanisha and Courtney. They were smiling and taking pictures of me as I waited in alphabetical order. Everyone was there, except that person that gave me air. It broke my heart that Roc wasn’t there. He’d been there the entire time I’d studied and worked my way through this program; rubbing my feet during long nights of studying, making sure that I passed every test, and encouraging me. But as I swallowed the heartbreak, I knew that he deserved better than to be here and so did I. We deserved
a life without forcing his family to accept me.
“Yanna Elizabeth Hill.”
I smiled through the heartache as I stepped foot on the stage. I could hear my family cheering. I could hear Courtney’s loud, squeaky squeals. “Yaaas! Wheeeew! That’s my girl!”
Their cameras flashed as I took the diploma from Professor Leonard Fine, the Head of the Department of Education. Just as he and I posed for the professional photographer, I heard the loudest roar from the most familiar voice.
I lost all composure just as the photographer snapped my photo. Surely, the proof of the picture that the school would send me would reflect my confusion and excitement. My eyes darted around the audience, but I could see nothing but the continuous flash my family’s cameras.
I left the stage with wobbly knees. I took each of the five steps very carefully, ensuring that I didn’t fall and embarrass myself in front of the auditorium of over five–hundred people. Before I sat down, I tried to scan the crowd quickly, but could not find his eyes. However, one look at Courtney and Tanisha told me that they’d heard it too.
Daddy was there.
The rest of the commencement went by in a blur. It was the longest hour of my life. Even as we marched out, I tried to find him and continued to fail.
Maybe I was hearing things.
But my heart knew differently. I had heard his voice, but as I scanned the lobby of the concert hall, full of friends, family and graduates, I started to think that he had come and gone, scared that I would dismiss him because of the way that I had been ignoring him.
“Yanna! Over here!” I followed the sound of my mother’s voice. They were behind me a few feet away wearing the same proud smiles that I’d seen on their faces as I received my Master’s degree.