Jude smiled. “Of course she did.” He stared for several minutes over the horizon. “We came here for vacation a few months before…”
“Yeah, that’s what she said. Apparently it was memorable.”
Jude didn’t comment. His face went from smiling to serious. He ducked his head and drew idly in the sand between his legs. “I won’t go back to her.”
“And why is that? You have some misguided impression she’s better off without you? Because that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. I might have to throw a punch or two your way to knock some sense into you.” Jason turned to stare at Jude head-on.
“She isn’t safe with me. Don’t you see? I can’t control the number of assholes who could be lurking out there in the ether, waiting to pounce on the best thing in my life and yank it out of my hands. That’s what assholes do.” Jude lifted his gaze and squinted into the sun. “Do you know how many men I’ve killed? Very powerful ones all over the world. Who knows what sort of hits have been placed on my life? I won’t take this kind of risk with Lori’s life again. I promise you I won’t return this time. I beg of you. Let this go. Leave me in peace and make sure Lori has a great life.”
“Peace?” Jason’s voice cracked as he spoke. “You think sitting here staring at the ocean will bring you peace? You can honestly tell me you rest easily at night knowing you left her to pick up the pieces of your ego?”
“My ego? What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You’re so vain you think Lori’s very existence depends on your ability to keep her safe? What if she falls in the shower tomorrow? Is that your fault too? What about an earthquake? It might swallow her house and leave her buried. Also your fault?” Jason grabbed his friend’s arm and forced him to meet his gaze directly. “You can’t keep bad things from happening to anyone, Jude. Not even the woman you love. But you can sure make her life miserable by being a jackass.”
Jude gasped.
“So what happens if some other bastard does come back from the dead to hunt you down? You think they won’t find out about Lori and go after her anyway? Don’t you realize she is already compromised? She’ll be far better protected with your Rambo ass next to her than not.”
Jude tipped his head back down defiantly, ignoring Jason.
Jason stood. “Look, think about what you’re doing here. If you abandon her, you’re leaving her emotionally and physically open. And hey, what a coincidence. If you were with her instead of hiding from the world, you could kill both those birds with one stone. But what the fuck do I know? I’m just some asshole who used to be your best friend. Don’t listen to me.”
Jason turned and walked away. He’d said everything he could. Jude had marginally listened and hadn’t acknowledged much. All Jason could do now was hope his words would penetrate. No sense beating a dead horse.
Chapter Twenty-Five
“Lori? Why aren’t you ready to go?”
Lori opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. She was flat on her back on the bed in the guest room of Jason’s house, where she’d usually spent most of her days for the last month. She didn’t even glance toward Jason. “I can’t do it.” She flung one arm over her head and blocked out the light.
Jason sighed. She knew he was in the door. He did that a lot lately.
She’d had every good intention of pulling up her boot straps, literally, and going to Emergence with Jason tonight. It was a Friday. That’s what she did on Fridays. But the more she fretted over it, the less she wanted to be at that scene.
Any visual of the inside of her stomping ground made her cringe. After presenting herself in the most wishy-washy shade over the last few years, she felt like an idiot.
First she’d been a submissive and then a Domme and then she’d let a Dom hone in on her submissive scene. Plus she’d gone from being with a man to a woman and back to a man. The same damn man. The one who had ripped her heart out and left it on a table next to the front door.
Now what the fuck was she? Everyone would be staring at her, wondering what role she played. She couldn’t do it. Looks of sympathy from those who knew her best would bring bile to her throat, and those who’d simply seen her would think she was deranged.
She lay in silence as the front door opened and closed. The house was very quiet with Jason gone. She could hear a clock ticking and then the easy creaks of the house settling.
Her phone rang, and she lifted the cell from where it lay on the bed next to her.
Carlton.
“Hey, Carl,” she answered. She had no choice. If she ignored the call, someone would show up at the door.
“What’s this I hear about you staying home?”
Lori shook her head. News traveled faster than a rocket these days. Especially news that regarded Lori’s mental health. “Yeah, sorry. I know I said I’d be there, but I’m not up to it yet.”
“Every day is a rain check with you, Lori. Get off the bed and get dressed or I’ll come over there and get you.”
Lori smiled. Carlton would do it.
“Listen, I know you’re hurting and that’s to be expected, but you have to live. Fight for it. Don’t let your past turn you into a hermit.”
“I’m embarrassed. Besides. What am I? A Domme or a sub? It’s one thing to show up at the club anonymously, but another thing entirely when everyone knows what happened.”
“You’re a sub tonight. So put something skimpy on and get your ass over here. I’ll do a scene with you myself when I’m off. Maybe I can spank your behind until it’s pink and help you release your anxiety.”
Lori rolled her eyes. “Carlton, you aren’t coming anywhere near my ass, so get that idea out of your head.” The man was a powerful Dom. In another life maybe she could have been attracted to him. But she’d met Jude first, and another Dom didn’t do it for her now. She wasn’t sure they ever would.
“You coming?”
“Okay. Fine.” Lori sat up and glanced around the room. It was dark now. She’d been lying there longer than she’d thought.
“Be here within the hour or I’m coming after you.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll do it. But only because I can’t bear the idea of having you dress me. And dispose of any notion you have of doing a scene with me.” She shivered.
“Deal.” Carlton hung up.
Lori wondered what the hell she’d committed herself to and why.
Exactly one hour later, Lori eased up to the bar and leaned against it on her elbows. Her hands were shaking and she regretted this decision immensely. Emergence didn’t serve alcohol, and what she could really use was a few stiff shots.
The bartender slid her another Diet Coke as Jason took the seat next to her. “You came.”
“Carlton called and threatened me.” She smiled at him, but she knew it was a lame attempt.
“He can be persuasive.”
Lori turned her glass around on the counter, the condensation making it easy to spin against the wood.
“I want to ask a favor of you.”
She turned her attention to him.
“Since you’re here.” He narrowed his gaze. “I have a Dom here tonight who is relatively new. He could really use some practice. Would you do a scene with him for me? I’d ask someone else, but I’d rather it be someone I can rely on to use their safe word easily and assess his abilities after.”
Lori stared at him. “Is this a setup?”
He shook his head. “Nope. Swear. But you’re here now. Why not?”
She groaned. “Jason, I’m not sure—”
“Just a simple spanking scene,” he interrupted. “I’m not asking you to go home with him. But you could use the release and he could use the practice.”
She took a deep breath. “Okay, but you better not be setting me up, because I don’t care if he’s the god of mankind himself. I’m not ready.”
/> “Promise.” Jason eased off his chair and took her hand to help her down.
Lori followed him and soon found herself face-to-face with the Dom in question. He was perfectly attractive. Tall. Rugged. Broad. Not tall enough, rugged enough, or broad enough to compare to Jude, but she could do a scene with him if it would help him out.
“Shawn.” He shook her hand, meeting her as an equal for the introduction. “Thanks for helping. I’ve done half a dozen spanking scenes, so don’t worry.” He smiled, half his mouth turning up in a teasing fashion.
Lori took off her loose outer cape and hooked it on the wall. The only time she’d been to Emergence as a sub in over a year had been the one night with Jude weeks ago. She shivered. The cool air added to her nerves. She wore her most modest outfit and smoothed her hands down the bustier as she approached the spanking bench.
When she glanced at Shawn, she found his demeanor had changed while she wasn’t looking. He’d donned a serious expression appropriate to the scene and nodded at the bench while pointing to indicate she should take her position.
Lori’s hands shook as she stepped up onto the dais and leaned forward. She wore a short black skirt, but Shawn immediately unzipped it and lowered it, shimmying it down her legs so that she could spread her knees onto the pads on each side of the bench.
Cool air hit her ass immediately, making her aware of her bare skin. Wearing only a black thong now, she felt more exposed than she had in years. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, nestling her head against the leather under her cheek and closing her eyes against the world.
At least people hadn’t gathered in the quiet cove to watch. She wasn’t sure she could take that tonight.
Shawn smoothed his hands over her exposed cheeks and molded them to the flesh.
Breathe. Deep breaths. Let it go. Lori reasoned with herself as her heartbeat slowed. At least he wasn’t rushing.
Finally he took a quick swat at her left cheek. She flinched. Even though the blow was expected, she couldn’t stop herself.
Shawn soothed the flesh for a second and then did it again, this time on the right side. “You okay, love?”
She nodded. “I’m good, Sir.” She didn’t know what Jason’s real aim was in setting up this scene with her, but he might have been right. She could feel herself unraveling with each blow.
A third spank landed on the center, covering both cheeks, and she moaned as tension left her body.
Shawn swatted her again. He was a strong Dom. Not firm enough for her to request him in the future, but he was learning.
A deeper voice broke the silence. “If you wait longer between each blow, the need to come will well up inside her, giving you stronger results in the end. I bet she’s fucking hot when she orgasms.” She froze. Those words pierced her memory, shocking her and yanking her into the past. She had to have imagined the deep voice and the exact phrase he’d said to her the night he’d interrupted her scene over a month ago.
For a moment she was sure she’d imagined the voice. She didn’t open her eyes, unable to decide if she willed Jude to be standing behind her or if she would prefer to jump up and slap him if he was.
And then another voice. Carlton. “Jude. What the fuck, man? You can’t keep waltzing in here, taking over people’s scenes.”
Lori squeezed her eyes shut. So it was him. She couldn’t bring herself to look. She gripped the hand rests with her palms and held her breath.
“It’s okay, man,” Shawn said. “Obviously you two have a history?”
“A long one,” Jude almost growled.
“I’ll back off,” Shawn said.
“Jude…” Carlton warned. “Why do you always have to be so unconventional?”
Jude chuckled. “I like to make an entrance. Keeps my sub on the edge.”
“Your sub, as you call her, can make her own decisions with regard to who tops her or who she tops.” Carlton came around the bench and kneeled at her face. She could feel his breath as it hit her cheeks, but she didn’t open her eyes. “I’m sorry, Lori. I was away from the front. Are you okay with this?”
“Yes,” she mumbled, though she had no idea why. She was anything but okay. All she knew was she needed the rest of that spanking, and there was no better man to give it to her than Jude. Her ass nearly hummed with the need to be swatted.
“Okay. You use your safe word if you need it. Red. Got it?”
“Yes.”
Carlton left. She didn’t have to look to know she was now alone with Jude. Except for the regular patrons who might be milling around, no one would be paying her much attention. She was his to command.
Jude set his hands on her ass, eliciting a moan she wished she’d been able to hold back. God, how she craved his touch. So badly she didn’t care that he’d left her not once but twice. She could rip him a new one after the scene, but for now, she needed his touch.
“I went by Jason’s, but when I didn’t see your car there, I came here.” As if she needed that explanation.
She remained still.
Jude traced his hand up her spine until goose bumps rose under her corset. She gritted her teeth, willing him to touch her more. Firmer.
Finally he spanked her several times in succession.
She held on tight, stiffening her entire body and gripping the pads with her hands. Her mouth opened, but she managed to control the need to moan.
After he molded her cheeks, he did it again.
This time she let out a long, low sound she barely recognized.
“That’s it, baby. Let it go. I know you’re tense.” He soothed her with his words and his hands as he trailed his palms down her thighs and back up toward her butt, letting his fingers graze through her sex over the top of her thong. “So sexy.”
Lori panted. That simple stroke across her pussy had sent her to the edge of need so fast her mind was spinning. Shawn had elicited no such reaction from her. She’d been solely in the zone for a mental release from a spanking when Jude had taken over with his sultry voice and his firm grip.
Now she needed to come. And she wasn’t done with the release from the spanking either.
Jude knew her well. He swatted her again, several times, pausing only to stroke her ass and let his fingers graze her tight hole. Eventually he swiped them directly and intentionally through her slit.
Lori bucked her ass.
“So wet, baby. I love how my touch affects you.” He leaned in closer as he spoke, his mouth near her ear, making her neck tingle. “Look at me, baby.”
She hesitated.
He gripped her hair and leaned closer. “Meet my gaze, so I know you’re with me.”
She blinked her eyes open and found him right in her face, his jaw covered with stubble, unshaved for a few days. She rarely saw him like that, and she swallowed around the need that built to a new high at his rugged look.
“Do you need to come, baby?”
“Yes, Sir.”
Jude ran his hands down her back until he left her line of sight. He nudged her knees together and tugged her thong away from her body.
She envisioned him stuffing it in his pocket like he always did. The ritualistic process relaxed her. She expected him to spank her again, but instead he went straight for her pussy, stroking through her folds and spreading her moisture around to coat her clit.
Without saying another word, he set his free hand on her back to hold her still and thrust two fingers into her.
A long moan escaped her lips. It felt so fucking good having him inside her. Even if she was still at Jason’s house, on the bed in the guest room, dreaming. She didn’t care. All she cared about was the release she would get at Jude’s hand.
He didn’t make her wait, for which she was grateful. After leaving her and making yet another appearance on her scene, the least he could do was let her get off quickly. And
he did. He set his thumb on her clit and fucked her pussy with his fingers, stroking them over her G-spot several times until she reached the peak. He knew that moment.
“Come, baby. Give it to me.”
She shattered, her pussy gripping his fingers and squeezing them over and over until she couldn’t breathe. It lasted longer than usual. When she finally gasped for air, he was still stroking her gently, his hand on her back working in tandem with the one between her lower lips.
“Beautiful, baby. God, you’re sexy when you come.” He lowered his top hand to her ass and gently stroked the skin. “And I love your ass when it’s all pink like this.”
Lori was afraid to move. Afraid it wasn’t real and she would turn around and find she’d imagined the entire thing.
Jude released her and stepped away. She pictured him grabbing a wipe to clean his fingers, and then he returned to stroke a soft wipe through her folds. When he finally helped her off the bench, she was jelly, emotionally and physically. He wrapped a throw around her body and lifted her into his arms.
She settled her head against his chest and gripped his shirt with her fist. She wanted to hit him and kiss him at the same time. But she was too wrung out for either. Instead she held him tight, undecided about her grip being in frustration or relief.
Jude carried her to a quiet corner and sat on a love seat. He kissed the top of her head and held her equally close as though she might slip away if he didn’t. He nuzzled his face in her hair and inhaled long and deep. After several minutes, he finally spoke. “I’m sorry.”
Lori sucked in a breath. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“I was a coward. I thought you deserved better. I panicked, fear that you aren’t safe with me eating a hole in me. When I saw you lying on that bed, all bruised and beaten, I lost it. It was inexcusable that I put your life in danger by coming back and taking over your world. If I hadn’t returned…”
She reached for his cheek and held his face with one hand. “Oh, Jude. You couldn’t have known all that would happen. You can’t take the blame.”
Bound to be Tested: Emergence, Book 3 Page 24