by E. L. Todd
“Do you love him?”
Cayson never asked me about my personal life. That was one subject he stayed clear of. Perhaps it was because he saw me as a sister and it made him uncomfortable. Maybe he just didn’t know how to talk about it. “I don’t know…I think it’s too soon for that.”
“Haven’t you been together for six months?”
“Yeah…but love is such a strong emotion. It’s not a word that should be thrown around easily.”
“I agree…but you shouldn’t need that long to figure out how you feel.”
“What are you saying?” I asked.
“Nothing,” he said immediately. “If you loved him, you would know. That’s all.”
I hadn’t thought about it much. I had a crush on him from the moment I saw him. We had a good time together, when we weren’t fighting, and there were a lot of things I liked about him. But love? I was too young for that. “Love is such a complicated thing. I doubt I’d even recognize it if I experienced it.”
“You would,” he said firmly. “It can’t be described in a way another person would understand. It’s totally subjective. And it’s illogical. It doesn’t make any sense. But the feeling is so paramount, so strong, that it can’t be denied. If you felt it for him, you would know. Your heart would burn with pain every time he left you. And it would burn even more when he was near.”
I processed his words, trying to sort them out in my mind. He spoke like he knew the emotion intimately, could recognize it even in a dark place. For as long as I could remember, Cayson didn’t have any serious girlfriends. Girls popped up here and there, but no one lasted long enough to be remembered. “Have you ever been in love?”
He continued to stare out the window. He was quiet for so long I wasn’t sure if he would answer. “Yes.”
With who? I wasn’t sure. “Who? What happened to her?”
He rubbed his chin while his eyes stared at something only he could see. “She didn’t feel the same way.” He didn’t answer the other question.
Oh. I found that hard to believe. Cayson was the perfect guy. He was a diligent student who was ambitious and successful. He never gloated about his perfection and intelligence. He was polite to everyone who was polite to him. He was humble and down to earth. And he was good-looking. I couldn’t count the number of times I caught girls looking at him. And they glared at me when they thought Cayson and I were an item. How a girl wouldn’t fall head-over-heels for Cayson was beyond my comprehension. “For what it’s worth, she’s a damn idiot.”
He chuckled. “I wouldn’t say that.”
“No, she is. Cayson, you’re the perfect guy. I see girls stare at you all the time. Every girlfriend I’ve ever had wanted your digits. Maybe she was a lesbian or something.”
He laughed again. “Maybe.” He rubbed his chin, where a light stubble of hair was growing. “By the way, the hotel was booked for the conference so I had to make reservations for a place down the block. It’s just a cab ride away.”
“Down the block? Don’t be ridiculous. You can stay in my room.”
He stilled for a second. “I would get the floor and you would get the bed?”
“No. My room has two queens.”
“Oh. If you’re comfortable with that.”
“We’ve slept together before…countless times.”
“As long as you’re okay with it.”
“I am.” I pulled a blanket over me and closed my eyes.
“I’ll wake you after we land and all is safe.”
“Okay.” I yawned and kept my eyes closed.
***
We left the cab and walked into the hotel. “Reservation for Preston.”
The woman at registration pulled up the room. “Here you are. Two nights in the presidential suite.”
Huh? “No, I have a deluxe suite with two queens.”
She checked again. “No, it says you were upgraded.”
“But I can’t afford that,” I blurted. Could they just upgrade me then charge me like that?
“It’s already been paid for.”
Cayson chuckled. “Your father must be here.”
I scowled. Only he would pull something like this. “That’ll be fine. Thank you.”
She handed the keys over. “Have a great stay.”
“Yeah.” I didn’t mean to sound annoyed but I couldn’t help it.
The bellman carried our bags to our room on the top floor. When we stood in the elevator, Cayson smirked.
“What?” I said.
“Your dad is hilarious.”
“Sometimes I wonder if he just does this stuff to piss me off.”
“He probably gets a kick out of it.”
“How does my mom deal with him?”
Cayson shrugged. “Love makes people crazy.”
“Insane, actually. She must be off her rocker to love such a madman.”
Cayson rubbed the back of his neck. “I like Uncle Sean. He’s definitely a man who has my respect.”
“You’re only saying that because he’s family.”
“No.”
I sighed. “Well, Slade really is an idiot. He actually pulled Trinity’s hair in the library.”
Cayson laughed. “I feel like we are five-year-olds and playing in the sandbox all over again.”
“Remember when I put sand down Roland’s pants and he cried?”
“Could never forget it.” He smirked.
The doors opened and we finally entered our room. The size of the suite was bigger than the average house. It had a full kitchen, two living rooms, and a master bedroom.
I rolled my eyes. “Seriously? We’re not even going to be in the room most of the time.”
Cayson walked to the center table and saw the enormous bouquet of flowers. “Skye, I think these are for you.”
I came closer then stared at the white lilies. They were in full bloom and smelled like a summer day. I opened the card.
Skye
I’m sorry about the room. But my daughter doesn’t deserve anything less. I’m flying in tomorrow and I’ll see you then.
P. S. I hope you like the flowers. They are your mother’s favorite.
I dropped the note on the counter. “He’s something else…”
“He just loves you.”
“I know…”
Cayson gave me a serious look. “You never let the wealth get to you, and you choose to be independent. You never take that for granted, and I respect you for it. But don’t take for granted the most important thing in the world, your father and mother. Sometimes he’s over the top, but a lot of daughters would kill to have a father who loved them as much as he loves you. Don’t forget that.”
I sighed. “I know, Cayson.”
“I’m known for my wisdom as well as my dashing looks.” He walked away then moved to his suitcase near the couch.
I picked up a lily and brought it close to my nose, smelling it. I knew my father was crazy, but his intensity came from a good place. He could drive my mom up the wall, but he also made her love him even more every day.
“I’ll take the couch,” Cayson said.
“Okay. Too bad we don’t have our original room. It would have worked out perfectly.”
“No, this is better. It’s a pull out bed.”
“Good. That worked out.”
Cayson took out his phone and typed a message to someone.
“Hungry?” I asked.
“Starving.”
“Want to go out to dinner?”
His thumb hit the screen a few times. “There’s a nice restaurant in the lobby.”
“Black tie?”
“Yeah.” He put his phone back in his pocket. “You want to go?”
“Sounds good to me.”
***
After I showered and got ready, I walked out and saw Cayson sitting on the couch. He was wearing slacks and a button up shirt.
“Ready?”
He looked up and took me in. His eyes widened slightly before they r
eturned to normal. He stood up then turned off the TV. “Yep.”
I grabbed my purse off the counter then walked in my heels to the door. I was wearing a black dress that only had one shoulder. There was slight padding in the dress to support my chest. But it was nice not to wear a bra.
Cayson opened the door for me then let me walk out first. We took the elevator to the ground floor.
“What kind of food do they have?” I asked.
“Steak, greens, stuff like that.”
“Good.”
We were led to a table where Cayson pulled out the chair for me. He always did that no matter where we were. I was used to it. When Zack didn’t do it, it threw me off sometimes.
I immediately grabbed the wine list. “Would you judge me if I ordered alcohol?”
“I never judge you for ordering alcohol.”
“I knew we were friends for a reason.”
He smirked while he stared at me.
The waitress arrived at our table. “Good evening.”
“Hi,” I said.
“Special occasion?” she asked. “An anniversary perhaps?”
I tried not to laugh. “Oh no, we’re just friends.”
Relief filled her eyes. “Oh, I see.” She gave Cayson a long smile before she turned back to me.
Well, at least she made sure he wasn’t taken first.
“Can I get you a drink?” she asked.
“I’ll have a chardonnay.”
“Excellent choice.” She turned to Cayson. “And for you?”
“Whatever you have on tap.”
“You got it.” She walked away.
Cayson didn’t stare at her ass. His eyes were glued to mine.
“She was cute.” Her blonde hair was in a French braid and she had nice lips. I wasn’t gay, but I knew an attractive woman when I saw one.
Cayson didn’t respond. He looked at his menu and browsed the selections.
“So, are you seeing anyone right now?”
He stilled at the question. “No.”
It was impossible to get anything out of him when it came to this subject. “Do you hit it and quit it like Slade?”
He cocked an eyebrow while he looked at me. “Hit it and quit it?”
“Isn’t that what they used to say?”
He smirked. “I’m not like Slade. I thought that was obvious.”
“But you never talk about girls with me. You tell me everything else but that.”
He shrugged. “There’s not much to say.”
“Come on. You must have some juicy stories.”
He seemed uncomfortable. “I don’t have an active personal life like other people do.”
“Is it because you’re too busy with school?”
“Yeah…”
I looked through the entrees until I selected the New York sirloin. I put the menu aside. “Is there a reason why you’re so quiet about it?”
“No. I just don’t have much to say.”
“Okay, you can’t be celibate.”
“Well…no.”
Why was he being weird about this? “When was the last time you had sex?”
His eyes widened slightly. “Uh…that’s a personal question.”
“We tell each other everything. Why is this the only subject you aren’t comfortable discussing?”
He pressed his lips together but said nothing.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” I backed off and looked at the menu again even though I already knew what I was getting.
“You didn’t. You’re right—we tell each other everything. I guess I’m just not a kiss and tell type of guy.”
“It’s your privacy and I respect it. You don’t have to tell me anything.”
He sighed then leaned back. Conflict was in his eyes. He was battling for a decision, trying to make up his mind about something. His fingers drummed the surface of the table. “I had sex last week.”
He was finally opening up. “With who? Someone I know?”
“It was a woman I met at a bar.”
“How was she?”
His cheeks reddened slightly. “No complaints.”
This guy was as unreadable as a tree. “Are you going to see her again?”
“No. She’s not my type.”
“What does that mean?”
He shrugged. “She’s just not a woman I see myself falling for.”
“Any reason why?”
“No…the chemistry just isn’t there.”
I nodded. “I feel like that’s all Zack and I have.”
He stared at me but kept his mouth closed.
“He’s okay in bed. He does this thing that makes me—”
“Stop.” He said it like he was in pain. “Sorry, I just…it makes me uncomfortable.”
“Okay…” I even told my brother about my sex life and he didn’t cringe and practically gag.
Cayson became flustered. “Sorry…I guess I see you as a sister and it’s weird…” His voice was at a different pitch and tone. He didn’t sound like him.
“It’s okay. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“Let’s just…talk about something else.”
“Okay.”
The waitress returned with the drinks and took our order. She batted her eyes at Cayson then smiled like her life depended on it. When she walked away, Cayson still didn’t look at her.
“How’s school?” I asked.
“It’s good. Pretty uneventful.”
“I barely passed my biology class last semester.”
“Didn’t you get an A?” he asked with a laugh.
“But it was hard. I had to go to tutoring and everything.”
He smirked. “Well, you did well and that’s all that matters.”
“I need to get good grades otherwise I won’t get the company.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “I’m sure your father would give it to you even if you were an idiot.”
“I don’t know about that…”
“You’re his star in the sky. It’s a safe bet.”
“He could give it to Roland.”
“I’m sure there’s room for both of you.”
“Actually, I don’t think Roland even wants it. I’m not sure what he wants…”
“We all walk our own path.”
The waitress set the plates on the table. As soon as the aroma hit my nose, I started to salivate. She gave him a smirk again before she walked away.
Okay, now she was trying too hard.
Cayson cut into his chicken. “How do you like your food?”
“It’s good.” I was eating too much to pause for a more detailed response.
He smirked. “I can tell.”
We ate quietly until our plates were clean. I ate like I hadn’t in weeks. That plane ride erased my appetite, but it picked up again once we were on solid ground.
Cayson finished first then looked across the restaurant, staring at nothing in particular.
I wiped my mouth then caught my breath. “Damn, that was good.”
He chuckled. “Now I judge you.”
I hit his arm playfully. “I hadn’t eaten all day.”
“Even so…”
I hit his arm again.
The waitress brought the tab. “Thank you. Have a good night.”
“Thank you.” Cayson took the tab and placed his card inside.
“Let’s split it,” I offered.
He rolled his eyes. “Ignore her.” He handed the tab back to the obsessed waitress.
“You got it.” She walked away and headed to the register.
“You should let me pay,” I said. “You came all the way here just to support me.”
“No. If my father taught me anything, it was to never let a girl pay, whether you are sleeping with her or not.” He stared me down. “How long have we known each other?”
I shrugged. “Twenty years.”
“And when have I ever let you pay?”
“You let me b
uy you an ice cream from the ice cream truck one time.”
“Besides that.”
I sighed. “Never.”
“That’s right.”
I rolled my eyes.
The waitress returned with the card and the receipt. “Thank you. Have a good night.”
“Thanks,” Cayson said.
She pulled a napkin out of her pocket and pushed it toward him. “Give me a call sometime.” She smiled then walked away.
Cayson glanced at it then put his card in his wallet.
“Are you going to take that?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I don’t live in Washington DC in case you didn’t notice…”
“I have a feeling she doesn’t care.”
Cayson stood up, ignoring the napkin.
He was an enigma sometimes.
We headed back to the room.
“I Love Lucy marathon until we fall asleep?” I asked.
“Which will be in five minutes for you,” he teased.
“No,” I argued. “I can be a night owl when I want.”
“Yeah, right.” He kicked off his shoes then sat on the couch. He turned on the TV then leaned back.
I changed then joined him on the couch. My hair was pulled back and I was wearing my flannel pajamas but I knew Cayson didn’t care about my appearance. He’d seen me without make up hundreds of times.
I lay down on one side of the couch and pulled the blanket over me.
“Twenty bucks says you’re asleep in five minutes.”
“You’re on.” I kept my eyes glued to the TV.
Within minutes, I felt the heaviness leak in. My eyes wanted to close and my breathing changed. I tried to fight it but I couldn’t. The darkness descended.
“Good night, Skye.”
I wasn’t sure if I really heard that.
***
When I woke up, I was in my bed. Cayson must have carried me and tucked me in at some point. Now I owed him twenty bucks. Damn.
I showered and got ready for the conference, wearing a new pencil skirt. I bought a new pink blouse that I liked because it kept everything tucked in and tight. My breasts didn’t look nearly as big.
I clicked diamond earrings to my earlobes and made sure my hair was as presentable as possible. My father got me a gold bracelet with my name engraved into the medal, and I usually wore it to any fancy occasion.