by Gann, Myles
“Don’t be mad, I’m sorry.” He turned back around to his palm. “Will you be long?”
“Dunno,” he said weakly.
She turned slowly and began walking to the bed. Within minutes, he was the only one awake. As Stanley slept on the floor and Alice took over the entire bed, Caleb squeezed the railing with one white-knuckled hand, and attempted over and over again to produce any evidence of power in his other with no results.
Chapter 24
Alice gently knocked her foot against the new bowl at her feet and observed the force of the gentle rock as it wiggled wholly through the jellied oatmeal. ‘Why are we out here eating this? The town was worse than this? No, he had to have a better reason. I want to go home. There’s nothing I’d be able to do anyways. I feel so helpless out here.’ She reached out with her foot and curled her toes repeatedly through Caleb’s short leg hairs. ‘He’s so distracted. Not even looking over at me. Just staring with his head down atop his crossed arms cradling his knees to his chest like he’s trying to be me. He’s moving. His head’s up. Talk to me please.’
“What’s up?”
‘His eyes are reset and his face is tight.’ “What’s wrong?”
He smiled at her. “A lot of things.”
“With you?”
“Everything is fine right now. Eat up. Walking around isn’t good on an empty stomach.”
“You’re telling the truth? What’s on your mind?”
“Thoughts and feelings as always.”
“About me?”
“Some, but not everything is about you.”
‘That was sharp.’ She moved her foot back and picked up the bowl in both hands. “You don’t talk to me about the stuff about me.”
Caleb’s body turned out of the corner of her eye and his voice projected straight to her sideways ear. “What do you want to know?”
‘Tell him what you thought. Ask him about that night on the beach and that day in the sun.’ “When we were on the beach, we-I’ve never connected to anybody like we did then. And the day before that made the night seem even better….” She brought her face around to him. “It was the second perfect time we’ve ever had together.”
“Every time is perfect, but those two were perfectly perfect.”
“Exactly, but I can’t get something straight.” ‘Tell him, tell him.’ “You told me on Halloween that you wanted somebody to fight for you, and I did, and you said that love was the ultimate goal, and it is, and you said that you couldn’t be with me until you were perfect, and we overcame that, and I always hear people say how cute we are together, and they’re right. I guess I’m asking what’s left for us to worry about.”
“Nothing. There was never anything to worry about. Those words that you’re looking for are a proclamation of an eternal, unbreakable bond. Love, in a most fundamental way, isn’t about roses, sayings, or people. The topic of love has been broken down into friends and family, or drives and wills, but even beneath those squabbling rationalities, love has to exist, or there would be nothing to debate. People aren’t predestined to do this or that, and one cause doesn’t lead to one effect for all people; love is the variable because it is, with all the wires untangled and unknotted, a word representing the pull of ourselves to some person, some idea, or some object. So much importance is placed in love, and that’s because when a person says ‘I love you’ they are truly saying ‘You are the only perfect thing in this world, and nothing will ever change that.’ To that effect, those words are cuffing.” He looked at Alice squarely. “There’s still more for us to experience before those words can come out. There’s still this world that needs saving before we can be bound.”
She dropped the bowl, allowing the oatmeal to clump in the short grass. Her head rolled quickly to the fire and the hanging crockpot strung up precariously, then to the tree line across the tiny clearing where Stanley emerged. ‘No clouds in the sky. No clouds in his eyes. He’s not lying, but why does this hurt then? The truth hurts now.’
Stanley sat down across from Caleb. “It’s a lot easier to navigate when we walk.”
“Life is full of trade-offs.” Caleb and Rue shared a smile. “Anything interesting?”
“We’re running through New Mexico now, but we seem to be curving towards Oklahoma, or Texas maybe. I’d guess Texas just for the places to hide safely.”
Alice looked on as Caleb drifted his eyes into the distance. “It should be a fairly easy path to follow once we get to the roads in Texas.”
“Remind me again why we’re walking.”
Caleb stretched out his legs. “It’s taking its time recharging. Nothing wrong with a little Great Plain’s air is there?”
“I’m tired of walking,” Alice injected, drawing a surprised look from Stanley. Caleb stood up and stretched his arms above his head. “I’m not a big fan of camping either.”
Caleb whirled quickly and kicked the kettle out of the fire and ten yards into the wooded area. “This isn’t about you! This isn’t about me or him or you or David or Stephen or the damn people that he’s killed! This isn’t about doing what’s comfortable or what’s easy!” Alice watched meekly as he finally took a breath and calmed his voice. “This is about doing what’s right.”
‘Scary. He yelled, but why? Did I make him mad?’ He put his hands behind his head before walking into the light woods and gingerly picking the pot up with his bare hands, gritting his teeth when he touched the side. ‘Not everything is about me.’
- - -
Caleb was the first to step into the dark valley. He could feel the heat of the enclosed space demanding a porous response from his body as the red rock beneath his feet was quickly shading to black the further into the grade he wandered. The dark grass and black dirt collided underfoot while Alice and Stanley still struggled down the uncharted path above, Stanley helping her down the sharp rocks while Caleb stood and waited at the bottom. They finally joined him. Stanley stopped at Caleb’s side while Alice continued to walk and completely avoided his searching eyes. His hands wiped at his heavily sweating forehead. “You look awful, Caleb.”
“Rue, would you mind hanging back about ten yards?”
His friend nodded before Caleb quickly hustled to Alice’s side. “You’ve been avoiding eye contact for a while now.”
“You yelled at me.”
Caleb moved to help her over a bump in the land, but she walked around it instead. “Because you weren’t looking at this in the right way.”
“You’re suddenly the expert on complete right and complete wrong? All the questions in your head clear up in time for you to boss me around?”
He rubbed at the back of his head. “You were mad at something else before this, and that’s wrong. You shouldn’t be mad at something that can’t be said yet. ‘Yet’ being the keyword.”
“Can’t predict the future, though. How do I know you’ll say them ever?”
“This is something you dealt with before.” She tried to quicken her pace, but Caleb remained simultaneous in her strides. “This can’t be dealt with unless you want it to be.”
“You don’t think I want this to be completely perfect?”
“Alice, there are some things that need to be faced before there can be that kind of perfection.”
She held her hands down with her wrist and fingers curled upward. “All right.”
As a small village came into view, Caleb stared at the side of Alice, wondering furiously what was going on within her mind.
---
“This place wasn’t on the map,” Stanley said softly from behind the walking couple. ‘What in this damn world haven’t we faced? He’s stalling me for some reason. Lying? No, he’s not I can tell. There’s something else he needs…no, apparently “we” need to know. Who the hell is “we” anyways? I know I love him. Don’t I?’
Caleb turned as he kept walking, looking towards Stanley but not her. ‘Why not?’ “Mysteries can be fun.”
‘Maybe this just isn’t important to
him and I’m just someone after all.’ Her eyes moved to Caleb’s back; his head lowered and his feet stumbling over the uneven ground. ‘He’s thinking. He’s kept me around and the Prince has hated me for it. He has to love me. He has to.’ The edge of the village came as the sweltering sun broke from behind a small line of clouds, increasing the density of the air quickly as they crossed with Caleb and Stanley walking ahead. Caleb glanced back and held out his hand for Alice to take, to which she stared. ‘What’s he asking me? Will you stay with me, again? Are you still mad at me? He’s never been afraid to ask those questions. Look at his eyes, and that smile. He just wants to hold my hand. That’s all he’s saying.’
She reached and grabbed his fingers and gently squeezed between him and Stanley. ‘Buildings are low, but the dirty streets are empty.’ “Bullet casings on the ground here, Caleb.”
Alice kicked a few of them down the trampled grass road. “Where are the guns?”
Her eyes stuck to Caleb’s back as he seemed to slow his movements forward between the tiny blocks. ‘Stanley’s lower, like he’s ready for something—’
One person jumped around each corner, Stanley taking his attacker to the ground instantly while Caleb swiftly thrust his head into the nose of the other young male. Both men were down and groaning, Alice releasing his hand while Rue and Caleb glowered. “Visitors are welcomed warmly here.”
The little one beneath Caleb tried to stand up again, but was put back down with his backhand. Stanley grabbed the fallen-again boy and dragged him closer to the one beneath the military man’s boot. “You broke his nose.”
Caleb didn’t smile as he looked at the spreading pool of blood beneath the nostrils of the teenager. “Obviously.” He knelt down while Alice unpacked a few bandages. “You two aren’t alone here. Where’s the leader?”
The one beneath Stanley’s boot spit out blades of grass before speaking. “We weren’t gonna hurt you, but people are usually about falling over when they come into town.”
‘No, no, his face is fine. Both faces—gotta help them. I can take it. Caleb’s eyes…over and over.’ Alice leaned forward and gently dabbed at the bloody nostrils. She watched as Caleb gently lifted Stanley’s boot with a look and helped both boys up. ‘Young. Small legs and beat-up running shoes. Caleb’s eyes are sad suddenly.’ “Are you going to be okay?”
“Yeah,” answered the tentative boy with muffled chords through the thick burst of gauze. “You really hit me hard.”
“That was his jab, kid, now talk.”
‘They’d disappear inside of Stan’s frame.’ “I promise we were going to accommodate you.”
Caleb took the gauze from Alice’s hand and inspected the nose more thoroughly as he spoke. “Sorry, first off. Second, there was never a ‘here’ on the docket. Third, there won’t be an extended stay. New Mexico is just the last turn in the road.”
“New Mexico?” The kid continued to talk atop the pain of Caleb’s gentle hands. “You’re in northern Texas, stranger.”
The couple shot a look to Stanley who instantly withdrew the map from his pocket. The other boy walked up slowly and helped the smaller teen to his feet. “We can take you to where everyone else is, if you want. The leader will be there soon, I think.”
Alice stepped forward. “Lead the way.” The boys turned and walked slowly while Caleb looked to Alice and Stanley. “Rue will be a while. We’ve got time to talk and get some directions from the leader.”
Caleb smiled to Stanley behind her before taking her hand and catching up to the walking boys. ‘The blocks here are so small. There were…four houses in the first row, and that’s the third row we’ve passed,’ she thought as they walked into a larger grassed area, various sitting or laying bodies occupied the amphitheatre seating that faced down into a haphazard circle. The stage was raised grass beneath a shading tarp that held two houses in the middle with their openings facing one another. ‘Fourteen houses. Good number. Holy crap their faces are so sad.’ She turned her head and buried into Caleb’s warm body. ‘His heart’s beating faster. He’s looking at their faces too.’
“Mr. Dyllo?”
He moved quickly between gasping, sweating people and into a lonely part of the top stoop beneath the beating sun and breezeless blue. Alice took the long way around while keeping her eyes attuned to the reactions that spilled across Caleb’s face. ‘He’s concerned. Now guilty. Not anymore. He’s reset. He’s…hopeful? No, he’s nothing. He’s just listening now.’
She reached Dyllo’s back and knelt down to match Caleb’s height. “What are they doing to you,” Caleb asked.
“Fulfilling my request, Caleb.” His face turned—‘Dry eyes, so sad, can’t look,’—towards Alice. “Gentle girl, you of all people should not be here.”
With her eyes closed forcefully, she asked, “What is this place?”
“This is where people with true courage come, my dear.” He turned back to Caleb. “I take it you led them here?”
“Indirectly.”
“You don’t believe that.”
She watched as Caleb’s eyes became completely vacant and his smile spread lightly across the stoic plane of his face. “You do.”
“I can’t see how I ever brought myself here, but I know this is where I’m meant to be.”
“No, you’re not.”
She listened to Dyllo’s cracked laugh. “I cannot see what’s right and what’s wrong. I can’t see what you see. All there is for me to see is myself.”
“And the world you’ve created. Please don’t do this.”
“I’ve created nothing substantial, or everlasting. Perhaps they’ll dedicate a breeze to me. Would that be right?”
“You love life. You can’t do this without being wrong.”
Alice stood and backed away, still within earshot of the conversation. “Please don’t think less of me because we chose separate paths.”
“You have a choice.”
“It is one I cannot live with.”
Caleb looked down and bounced on his bent knees until they straightened. His body turned and began to quickly descend the steps towards the two houses. Alice swerved to a stair case and descended after him, only glancing back at Dyllo once. ‘Silver object in hand.’
The pounding of a horse’s hooves against the ground met her at Caleb’s side. From atop a tall horse, a man smiled down before dismounting, his long cloak dragging the dead grass beneath his landed feet while his eyes shined dull red from beneath the hood as he descended. She was beside Caleb, but far away; ‘Oh god this is creepy. Caleb’s not scared, you shouldn’t be either. Stay right here.’
“Hello,” the male voice from beneath the cloth said with a deep crackle sending shivers from his breath unto Alice’s spine while a pale arm extended from beneath the black robe. “My name is Death.”
“You’re kidding.” Caleb smiled at Alice. “Death?”
“That’s what they call me.”
Caleb extended his hand. ‘Firm shake.’ “Nice to meet you, then.”
The pale shake moved to Alice’s front. “You are?”
“Alice,” she said while quickly moving her hand up, up-and-down, then down again.
“Lovely. Come inside, please. The heat is dreadful.” All three moved into the small den on the left. The pale man let Alice and Caleb sit together across from him while he took the position opposite the door. “You two will be some of my youngest visitors. Not the youngest, but among them.”
“What goes on here?” The man removed his hood, revealing a white skull covered in fine, clear hairs. His face turned back to them as he sat. ‘Small face and head with sunken, red eyes.’ “You’re Death?”
“As was said, young lady, that is what they call me. What is done behind the name is a completely different matter. When you strip away all the smoke and mirrors of our quaint little village here, I am simply a man that fulfills a need. Those people are just the ones who prefer to fulfill that need sooner than later.”
“Where are
the guards? There were bullet casings on the way in.”
The man smiled while flashing the bright red lenses in his skull. “A man came to me with guilt wallowing within experience of a terrible deed. War crimes, no matter how justified they seem at the time, tear mankind apart from the inside out. He was no different. This was many years ago, mind you, but a blink in my memory. The commanders in the Second World War had this man firing bullets into lines and lines of unprotected, subjectively guilty men with blindfolds and final glows between their teeth. Wars end, but he could not stand the idea of men ending by his hand, by his intent. That was the key to it all: he had wanted their hearts to stop, their brains to gush from fresh holes, and he achieved that only to find himself of a different mind later. He came here, after having found himself again free of the commanding influence, and asked me to end it. He chose to be shot with a blindfold over his eyes and the cigarette of finality glowing brightly in the deep night. The bullet casings don’t move much around here.”
Alice smiled. “At least he atoned for what he did.”
The man’s face reset while looking at Alice before smiling to Caleb. “Ridiculous, the things they believe, aren’t they?”
“He didn’t atone. He didn’t fix anything because there was nothing he could fix,” he said softly to Alice. “You seem to know a lot about me.”
“I know the name ‘Caleb,’ but is that who you even are anymore?” His eyes began shifting at the space between Caleb and Alice before she looked down and away. “She’s not very happy with you right now.”
“You wouldn’t be either,” she mumbled.
“Oh, and it’s serious. Do tell. Stories keep this place warm for months.”
Caleb turned to her. “This isn’t the moment.”
“Or the place? Tell me when and where so I can be there.” ‘I snapped. That’s me snapping? Why? We were fine just a moment ago. Why not now?’ “He won’t say that he loves me.”
“This has indeed become the tent of grander things now. What was his reason?”