by Ann Gimpel
Warmth and tenderness filled her. The last time anyone had told her they believed in her was so long ago, she couldn’t remember which of her parents had said it. They’d gone into hiding, so she hadn’t seen either of them in the past two years. “Thanks.”
“Think of something that makes you very happy or very sad.”
“Why?”
“Strong emotions can help you shift.”
Audrey brought up a mental picture of Max. She imagined herself lost in his arms, his mouth pressed hungrily on hers. The wolf woofed approvingly. She deepened her fantasy and imagined herself naked in his embrace. Her nipples pebbled against his well-muscled chest. His cock pressed against the juncture between her thigh and belly, hot and heavy with need.
“Perfect,” her wolf crowed. “You’re back. By the way, I like him. Let’s find him and fuck him.”
“I wish we could. It’s more complicated than that.”
“Why? Sex is never complicated.”
Audrey shifted from foot to foot and realized there were only two of them. She felt her way to the bedside table and drew a black market candle and matches from its single drawer. She lit the candle with quivering hands and sank onto the edge of the bed. “Shit!” she muttered. “I can’t believe it. The infusion worked. I’m really and truly a shifter. Finally.”
She thought she should jump up and down and whoop her delight, but her body trembled from head to toe. Probably an overabundance of adrenaline from all her attempts to shift back into it.
“No,” the wolf said sagely. “You’re shaky because you want that hunky man so much. Let’s go find him and—”
“Is this one of the sideline benefits of being a shifter? You maintain a running commentary in my head?”
“Yes. Do you have a problem with that?”
Audrey thought about it. “No. Not really. It will take some getting used to, though.”
“I think you should shift again. It gets easier.”
“How would you know?”
“I just do.”
She took a measured breath. Her wolf was right. She did need to practice. If she didn’t get more of a feel for the transformation, she might shift spontaneously at an inopportune moment. “All right.”
Audrey visualized the wolf—no, her wolf, she corrected herself—in all her lupine glory. This time, she felt the transformation. Her body lengthened; her limbs moved beneath it. That wasn’t so bad. She trotted from room to room and then visualized her human form. This time simply thinking of herself as human worked without ginning up a sexual fantasy about Max. Encouraged, she pushed herself though two more cycles.
Human again, she blew out the candle and lay on her shredded sheets. She supposed her T-shirt was somewhere in the wreckage. No matter, I can get another one. Since I don’t need any more infusions, I won’t have to watch my pennies quite so closely.
“I’m going to sleep for a little longer,” she told her wolf.
“Fine. I’ll watch over us.”
A glow started deep in Audrey’s belly. The partner she’d dreamed of for years was finally in her head and by her side. It took some of the sting out of knowing she could never be with Max. Her 35 percent shifter blood would have been a hard sell, but now that she could shift, human men were definitely off limits. With a surge of feral protectiveness, she knew she’d do whatever it took to keep herself and her wolf out of harm’s way.
Chapter 4
Max drove back to his uptown mansion around one in the morning. He hadn’t been terribly efficient working through things, or he’d have been home a couple of hours earlier. No matter how hard he tried to concentrate, all he could see was Audrey. The dimple she got in her cheek when she smiled. The sparkle in her eyes when she was intrigued by something. Her masses of honey-colored hair with its reddish cast…His groin tightened. He forced himself to focus on bringing the car to a stop. Crashing into the wrought iron gates was not a good idea.
He clicked buttons on his wrist computer, and the gates to his estate swung open. He waited until the car behind him carrying both security guards cleared the gate before closing it. He’d invited them to wait out the night inside his house, but they’d demurred.
“We need to patrol outside,” Bart had told him. “Not much good for us to hole up in your cozy kitchen. We wouldn’t hear a bad guy until he was on top of us.”
Max had thought about arguing that his house staff person was more than adequate, but he still felt guilty about giving Loren and his boys the slip the previous night. I’ll behave myself. Maybe that will give me a little latitude next time I need to go check on the underground. Speaking of which…
Max drove the hundred yards to his Tudor-style mansion set toward the back of a half-acre lot. Flood lights flared. He gathered his briefcase, stuffed to the gunnels with intel he’d perused earlier, and trotted up broad flagstone steps to huge, carved double doors. His fingers hovered over his wrist computer to retract the locks, but the door slid open.
“Sir. You’re late tonight.” Johannes, his butler and manservant, was clad in jeans that rode low on his hips. His chest was bare and his shoulder length, dark brown hair sleep-tousled. The muted alarm, which sounded in the house whenever the gates opened, had probably wakened him. A trusted member of the shifter underground, Johannes was a mountain cat shifter and one of Max’s oldest friends.
“Feel like a cup of coffee in the upstairs study?” Max quirked a brow.
“Of course, sir. Coming right up.” Johannes peered through the door at the car pulling up behind Max’s. “Who are they, and will they be joining us for coffee?”
Max shook his head. “They’re guards from the Capitol. It’s a long story. I’ll explain once we’re settled.” Johannes would understand what Max meant. He wanted them in the secure portion of the house where they’d be safe from electronic surveillance.
Fifteen minutes later, Max had traded his tailored dark blue suit for silk pajama bottoms and a well-worn, cotton three-quarter robe. Both were teal, one of his favorite colors, although he couldn’t wear it to work since it wasn’t professional enough. He strolled into the walnut paneled study with metal embedded in every wall. Johannes was already there. He’d slipped an old fisherman-knit sweater over his bare torso. His green eyes were pinched with worry.
The minute the door closed, he said, “There you are. If you’d taken much longer, I would have gone looking for you.”
“Hmph. Guess you weren’t really asleep.”
Johannes rolled his eyes. “Of course not, but I had no idea who was with you. Playing dumb can work to one’s advantage.” He slammed a fist down on his thigh. “How could I have been asleep? The attempt on your life was all over tonight’s vid feed. I’ve fielded fifty calls from the underground headquarters. The only thing I did just now, besides make coffee, was call Ryan to reassure them you’re okay. What the fuck happened?”
Max chuckled. “It’s good to be needed—I suppose.” His smile faded. “It’s possible my identity’s been compromised. The assassin named me as a shifter just before I killed him. Get Ryan on the secure channel.”
Lithe as the cat he was, Johannes sprang to his feet, brought the wall screen to life, and clicked keys on his wrist computer. Ryan’s face appeared. At six feet four, he was a bit taller than Johannes, with hair as red as flame and hazel eyes. His forehead scrunched into anxious lines. “Boss. Thank Christ! We’ve all been huddled around the vid feed for hours. All they’d say is someone with a long criminal history tried to kill you, and that the man is dead.”
“He’s dead all right. I killed him. Ryan, you’ve got to find out who else knows about me. I have no idea how much O’Hare—if that’s even his real name—actually knew. He was masquerading as one of the guards. I hate to admit it, but he damn near got me and my secretary into the garage. I’m sure there was a car there with accomplices just waiting to take me down. Anyway, I figured out something wasn’t right and reversed the elevator. Once he knew the gig was up, he called me a s
hifter and a dirty, fucking traitor. He was definitely set to kill me—”
“How’d you know he wasn’t a guard?” Johannes broke in. “It’s damn lucky you saw through him.”
“My wolf smelled him.”
“Ah, credit for my good deeds.” The wolf preened.
“Be sure to thank him for us,” Ryan murmured.
“I already did.” Max bit back a grin. No matter how serious things got, his wolf always made him feel better.
“Do you think it’s safe for you to go back to the office until I’m done digging around?” Ryan asked.
“Mmph. Probably best if you work from here for a while,” Johannes said.
Max shook his head. “No. I can’t let them know they’ve rattled me. It’s got to be business as usual.”
Johannes took a slug of coffee. He poured another cup and handed it to Max. “How about if I put on my fancy duds and go to work with you?”
Max swallowed some coffee and considered it. “Well, Loren—”
“Who’s that?” Ryan cut in.
“Head of the security team at the Capitol.”
“Now that you mention it, I just might know him. Go on.”
Max leveled a glance at both men. “No more interruptions until I at least get a complete sentence out. Now, as I was saying, Loren knows I have internal security personnel. Given what happened earlier tonight, it wouldn’t seem odd if I brought one of my own men along. How’s your false identity du jour, Johannes?”
“Bulletproof.” The shifter grinned at him. He’d been in international espionage in one capacity or another since Napoleon’s time.
“Great.” Ryan blew out an audible sigh. “It’s settled. I’m going to sign off and get to work. Devon will help. He has great intel connections all through California. I’ll let you know as soon as I find anything, no matter how trivial. Um, boss…”
“Uh-huh.”
“If I come across something that doesn’t sit right, we’re hauling you in. We need you heading up the underground way more than California needs a governor. They’ve got redundancy in the House and Senate. No one like you, of course…” Ryan’s gaunt cheeks turned crimson.
It was Max’s turn to blow out a tense breath. “That is a last resort. And it will be my call. Understood?”
The muscles rippled in Ryan’s jaw. “I understand, but I don’t totally agree. You’re more of an optimist than I am. Also more of a risk-taker.”
“It’s why we’re a good team. Report as soon as you know something.”
The screen faded to gray. Max drank half the cup of cooling coffee before setting it down. He turned toward Johannes. “That’s all for tonight. Try to get some sleep. We’re due in at seven, which is,” he glanced at his watch, “less than five hours from now.”
“I’ll have something made for breakfast by six.” Johannes strode toward the door.
“Thanks. Don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Johannes’ face split into a broad smile; it turned his austere features into something quite attractive. “That makes two of us.”
Max stared at the leaded glass panes over his teak desk and finished his coffee. Muted lights flickered in crystal sconces. Floor to ceiling bookshelves held a selection of literature dating back to the sixteen hundreds. His study was a cozy retreat with its solid wood furniture and leather upholstered easy chairs. He’d recreated something very similar in dozens of houses over the long years of his life.
He steepled his fingers and rested his chin on them, thinking he should be more worried about whatever might be unfolding in some subterranean corner of the universe. Anyone who’d figured out his true identity was a force to be reckoned with. Normally, he’d have pulled out all the stops to identify and eradicate anyone and everyone who knew about his dual life.
I am doing that. I sicced Ryan on them.
Yes, but I should have joined him. All I’m doing is mooning over Audrey. The real reason I don’t want to work from here is I wouldn’t see her.
“I told you,” his wolf cut into his thoughts, “we need to finish what we started tonight. She’s ripe for the plucking that one.” A randy howl made Max laugh.
“Aren’t you worried? Someone just tried to kill us.”
“You don’t seem to be, so why should I?”
Max got to his feet. The wolf had a good point. He walked down the hall to his bedroom suite. It took up about half the third floor. Once inside, he touched a panel and one wall came to life with the Caucasus Mountains. Max never tired of looking at them. He’d been born there during a time when he and other shifters were valued for their magic. The computer program had several choices for a living wall mural, but Max always chose this one. It had been far too long since he’d left the States. Maybe this would be a good time to take a vacation. He hadn’t had one since taking office as the state’s governor.
He wondered what Audrey would think about western Russia and then mentally shook himself. She works for me. I can’t proposition her—about anything. If she went on a trip with me, she’d never be able to come back and work for me. The gossip crew would have a heyday, and they’d make her life a living hell. Even if we were circumspect, someone would find out. They always do.
He kicked off his slippers, lay on the large, raised bed, and let his mind drift. He wasn’t surprised when he found himself engaged in a replay of his hours with Audrey. He twisted his head from side to side, stretching out his neck and trying to dissolve the iron bar of tension sitting just between his shoulders. Max felt confused, an alien emotion. He prided himself on his analytic skill and the crystal clarity with which he viewed the world. He’d worked with Audrey for a year and a half. Sure, he’d noticed how attractive she was, but what in particular had happened today to plant her front and center on his radar screen?
Max puzzled through what was different. He wasn’t any lonelier than usual. He’d come to accept his unattached status. Much to his wolf’s chagrin, sex, for the sake of release, had lost its allure long ago. He remembered Kate Roman saying something like that, but she’d taken a different path. She hadn’t given up on sex—until she’d met Devon, she’d made a living working as a sex surrogate. But she had given up on finding a shifter mate. Like most of them did, he supposed. It was rare to find your mated one. The only reason they hadn’t died out entirely was they’d taken to breeding with humans. Of course, it produced diluted blood, but so long as a child was at least 50 percent, they’d still be able to bond with their animal and shift.
His mind wandered to the mating ceremony he’d performed for Kate and Devon after breakfast at the safe house just that morning. They’d looked so happy, and they’d positively reeked of morning sex. Max wished them well, yet jealousy stabbed. They had what every shifter wanted—the special one destined to bond with them throughout time. There was a second part to the mating ceremony that had yet to come. He’d watch them couple in their mountain lion form. While they were joined, he’d mark them with the mating stone a second time.
Max snorted. He couldn’t believe the mating ceremony had been less than twenty-four hours ago. It seemed he’d lived through several lifetimes since then. He was glad his wolf wasn’t nattering about finding them a shifter mate. It didn’t help matters. Max wanted a mate, but it wasn’t as if there were a store he could go to and select one. Shifters being under a death sentence didn’t help. Most potential mates were probably in deep hiding. With his wolf’s help, he could sniff out who had shifter blood, but knew better than to bring the topic up publicly. He’d been shocked when Audrey spilled the secret about her mixed blood at dinner. No one ever talked about things like that.
Audrey. As if thinking about her drew her near, her scent, all honey and musk, rose out of his memory and enveloped him. His cock twitched. In seconds, it curved against his belly, as hard as it ever got. Before he was even aware what he was doing, his hand snugged around his shaft. He wanted to come. Needed to. Wouldn’t be able to sleep without release.
Sin
ce when do I need an excuse to jack off?
Max stroked his erection. He closed his eyes and imagined Audrey’s tawny skin and multi-colored eyes. All that glorious hair fell to her waist. Peeking out from behind its thick curtain were generous breasts. In his mind, he licked and tongued them into stiff peaks. Her back arched, and he could almost hear her little, panting moans as she begged him to fuck her, to sink his full length inside her hot wetness. She pressed a hand between their bodies and took hold of him. In his fantasy, it was her hand stroking his hard-on, urging him onward.
He pushed her down onto a softly-carpeted floor. Her arms twined around him, nails digging into his shoulders. About the time he sank into her glistening mound surrounded by red-blonde curls, his cock jerked in his hand. Hot semen splattered his chest and stomach. The harsh sound of his breathing was loud in his ears. He gulped air; there wasn’t enough in the room.
When his heartbeat steadied, he got up and found his way to the bathroom. He glanced at the sunken marble tub and shower with its sunflower head. Both would wake him up. He settled for a warm washcloth and cleaned the evidence of his passion from his body. He was still hard. Max knew he could come again, but he wanted the real thing, goddammit. Not his hand married to his rich imagination.
This time when he lay down, the mountains on the wall opposite the bed comforted him. “If worse comes to worst,” he murmured just before he fell asleep, “I can go home. Lots of places to hide myself there for a decade or two. By the time I surface, maybe the world will have changed.”
“You’re not going to do that. We stand and fight our battles.”
Max groaned. “I need sleep,” he told the wolf.
“We don’t need to run away to Russia. We need Audrey.”
Max felt his lips tug into a smile just before darkness closed around him.
* * * *
The chime of his wrist computer dragged him from sleep. It was still dark outside, but he’d set his alarm for five-thirty to give himself time to shower. By the time he stepped out of his bedroom, ready for the day, briefcase in hand, it was a couple of minutes past six. Johannes would have a full breakfast laid out because he, too, liked eggs and toast and bacon.