by Nikki Chase
“Tell her we’ll see her at the mall tomorrow, baby,” Cole says soothingly, his hands caressing my skin and my hair. “I want to know everything and everyone that's important to you.”
“Okay.” I let my tears fall freely onto Cole’s luxuriously fluffy pillow, the little salty droplets seeping into the soft fabric of the pillowcase.
“I love you.” Cole kisses the back of my head and wraps his arms around me.
I keep quiet, but I place my hands on his strong forearms and gently caress his skin in response.
I’m not ready yet to tell him I feel the same way, but I have to admit I like the way things are going. It’s safe and comfortable with Cole spooning me, his hard body warm on my back.
“Yay.” I pull a chair back and take a seat while Cole does the same beside me. “I knew you'd be off today. It's the third Saturday of the month.”
“And you assume I don't have any plans.” Alice smiles while I take in the sight of all the delicious food on the table.
This particular restaurant is usually super busy, especially during the weekend. It's almost impossible to get a reservation at the last minute, but Cole made it happen. I asked Alice to order for all three of us while Cole and I were at the Apple store buying my new phone.
“Yes. I love you. But seriously, you need to get a life.” I glance at Cole. “This is my sister Alice. And Alice, this is Cole.”
“Your boss,” Alice says pointedly. Her lips form a big wide smile, but her eyes don't look very friendly. She extends a hand and says, “Hi, I’m Alice. Pleased to meet you.”
“Pleasure is all mine.” He shakes Alice’s hand and smiles. “I’m Cole. Emily’s boyfriend.”
Uh-oh. This is not going to be easy. We haven't exactly had the boyfriend-girlfriend discussion. I don’t mind Cole seeing our relationship that way, but Alice doesn't seem too impressed.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she says, sarcasm dripping with every syllable she utters. “I thought it was too early for bringing up something like that.”
“So.” I clap my hands together to break the tension and draw their attention to me. It's probably best if I’m the one who steers the conversation. “The conference went great. My presentation was a big success. Right, Cole?”
“You did really well, baby,” he says, smiling at me with that tender look in his eyes that I’m really growing to love. Maybe seeing how much Cole cares about me would soften Alice’s heart.
“And guess who I saw?” I look at Alice, who’s still eyeing Cole with suspicion. I stab some lettuce in the salad and bring it to my mouth.
“Who?” She asks as she takes a bite of her burger. It's so unfair the way Alice can eat anything and stay skinny while I have to watch what I eat and only occasionally treat myself.
“Marco,” I say.
“Oh. I totally forgot that he lives in Seattle now,” Alice says, looking genuinely surprised.
“I thought you texted him a few months ago after the interview.” I shovel more salad into my mouth. “By the way, this Caesar salad. It's really good.”
“Well…” Alice looks up like she's trying to remember.
“You know what's weird?” I take a sip of the Diet Coke Alice ordered for me. “He told me he didn't recommend me for the job. He said he didn't even know Cole. Well, not personally, anyway. I wanted to ask you about this when I was in Seattle, but I dropped my phone in the pool and couldn't reach you. You know, I don't remember anybody's phone number these days.”
“Whoa, hold up.” Cole raises his hands. His eyebrows are taut and there are lines in his forehead, but his lips are upturned. “You dropped your phone in the pool? As in the swimming pool at The Trident?” He bursts into laughter when I nod. “You didn't tell me that!”
“Well, I was mad at you at that time.” As much as I like seeing Cole laugh, I don't want our fight to be the subject of the first story Alice hears about us. “Wait. So, Alice, you told me Marco was the one who recommended the job, right?”
“I did.”
“See? I know I’m not crazy. So Marco just...forgot? He told me it was probably one of your friends instead.”
“He's right,” Alice says. “It's Randy from the restaurant. I just thought you'd be more motivated if you thought you knew the person who recommended you.”
“That's silly. You know I always value your input.”
“Well, I can't explain it to you. It seemed to make sense at the time.” Alice takes another big bite of her burger.
I look at Cole, who's been silent for a while. I raise my eyebrows at him.
"Right. Randy." He finishes chewing his steak and swallows. "I remember now. He's my father’s old friend. He asked me to personally see you."
Alice and Cole continue to not say much to each other as they eat, forcing me to be the one to keep the conversation going. I’m not going to lie, I was hoping it would be a little easier than this. But they seem determined to not get along for some reason.
When Cole excuses himself from the table to make a phone call, I use the time to have a frank conversation with Alice.
"Alice, you're not even trying." I put my fork down. It clangs as it hits the plate. "Can you please give him a chance? For me?"
"I really don't think this is a good idea, Em," she says.
"You're the one who's been telling me it's time for me to start dating again." I look at her with disbelief.
"Yeah, but I didn't think you were going to date your boss." She sighs. "I thought you were smarter than this."
“You’re saying that because I'm dating Cole? You used to date your boss too!" My voice grows louder as my frustration mounts. Such hypocrisy!
"Hello? Used to. I'm not dating him anymore. With good reason." Alice's eyes widen and her eyebrows are raised. "It's just not a good idea to date your boss."
"Look, just because it didn't work out for you or for Mom doesn't mean that I'm doomed to fail, too. I'm not you, and I'm definitely not Mom. And Cole's not your boss, or any of Mom's bosses." Some heads have turned toward us now, and I look around to make sure Cole is still outside. Lowering my volume, I say, "I like him, Alice. Like, really like him. And this is the first time since...you know."
"I just don't want you to get hurt." Alice takes my hand and looks straight into my eyes. "Maybe you should let this one go. There will be other men that you'll like. Em, I have a bad feeling about this."
"It's not that easy, Alice. It's... I don't..." I rack my brain, trying to find the right words to say. "I was starting to think I was never going to fall in love again. And then I started to fall for him."
"Oh, God. It's even worse than I thought." She sighs.
"Alice. I understand if you're worried. But I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself," I say.
"You don't get it, Em. I have a really bad feeling about this."
"You keep saying that, but you still haven't told me why," I say.
"You're right. I can't tell you what to do or how to live your life."
"So you're going to try to get along with Cole?"
"That's not what I said." Alice frowns when she notices Cole approaching our table. "I can't stop you from seeing him, but I don't have to be happy about it."
My mouth hangs open. I can't believe she's acting like such an immature brat. She doesn't even know Cole!
As Cole takes a seat beside me, a waiter comes along. He stops at our table and asks, "May I clear the table? Can I interest you in some desserts?"
"We'll just have the check, please," I say curtly, glaring at Alice.
"Very well," he says as he gets the empty plates on the table, somehow balances them on his hands, and walks away.
I planned to spend the rest of the night with both Cole and Alice, but it's obvious now that's not going to be a pleasant experience. And while Cole hasn't tried very hard, it's Alice who's being overly hostile toward Cole. She has unfairly judged him without even trying to get to know him.
"Excuse me." I stand up, causing my chair to drag
across the floor behind me, making a loud noise.
I don't care anymore who's watching. I make my way past tables of dressed-up diners as best as I can, navigating through my blurry vision. This night couldn't have gone any worse. And now I have to go hide in the ladies' room to cry.
20
Cole
“What do you think you’re doing?” My father’s voice booms through the phone.
Fuck. This sounds like the kind of conversation that’s going to take a while. Meanwhile, Emily and Alice are waiting for me at the table, and I really don’t want to leave them alone if I can help it.
“What is this about, Pop?”
“You know full well what this is about. Nora told me you had a guest last night. A woman who left long blonde hair in the drain. It’s right after you came back from the conference so I’m sure you can understand my suspicion. So please. Tell me it’s not her. Tell me you’re not that stupid.”
What the fuck? In what world is it normal for an elderly housekeeper to check the hair left in the drain? Does she think she’s Sherlock Holmes, or James Bond?
“It’s just some girl. Stop spying on me, Pop. I’m an adult. You should be ashamed of yourself.” I look around at the shoppers in the mall, checking to see if any one of them looks like one of my father’s spies.
“You may be an adult, but you’re acting like a child. So that’s how I’m going to treat you. You better not be with that girl, boy. You know damn well you’d be putting the whole family at risk.”
“Pop. I have to go, okay? I have things to do.” I hang up.
I bet he hates that. It’s the kind of thing that shatters the illusion that he’s pulling my strings, making me do as he orders. Fuck that. I can’t wait until Tuesday when I can finally tell him to fuck off.
It’s just three more days until Tuesday, I tell myself as I pass rows of dining tables to get to our table.
Even from a distance, I can tell something is wrong. Emily seems distraught. I knew this meeting wasn't going to go well, but Emily sounded so heartbroken last night I couldn't have possibly said no.
As soon as I silently take my seat, before I have a chance to get an idea of what's happening, Emily asks for the check and excuses herself to go to the restroom, leaving me alone with Alice, who proceeds to glare at me.
I only have one question in my mind: did Alice tell Emily anything?
“Are you out of your mind?” Alice tears into me as soon as Emily is out of earshot.
“Listen, I’m sorry it's—”
“Damn right you're sorry,” she says, cutting me off before I finish my sentence. “You should be ashamed of yourself, taking advantage of a vulnerable girl like that.”
“I think you have the wrong idea. I don't have any intention of taking advantage of Emily. On the contrary, I really care about her. I love her.”
“Yeah? Is that why she has no idea you were involved in the accident?” Alice's eyes grow as big as the oversized plates they use at this pretentious restaurant. She's challenging me.
I'm honestly taken aback by Alice’s protectiveness over Emily. For Emily’s sake, I'm glad she has someone who cares about her to this extent. But at the moment, she’s not making my life any easier.
“Did you tell her?” I ask after a long pause.
This is what I’ve been afraid of. Considering the way Emily avoided eye contact with me and immediately ran to the restroom as soon as I came back, I conclude that Alice has probably told Emily. Which means there's a good chance she won't even talk to me again.
“No,” Alice says while she fidgets with the glass of soda and ice cubes before her.
“Why not?” I ask with surprise.
“I want you to be the one to tell her.” She looks straight into my eyes as she says this, her hands playing with the cold condensation on her glass.
“Why?”
“It's not for your benefit, if that's what you're thinking. In fact, I’ll tell you right now that if you don't tell her, I will.” The flame burning in Alice's blue eyes tells me it’s not an empty threat.
“Believe me, I was already planning on telling her.”
“Good.” Alice seems relieved. Her jaw and facial expression relax.
“Look, I don’t think you’re a bad person, Cole. I know as well as you do that it was an accident. I wouldn’t have said yes to your crazy proposal if I didn’t think you were innocent,” Alice says. “But I definitely wouldn’t have said yes if I had known that you were going to…to…to seduce Emily.”
The way she hesitates before uncomfortably saying the word “seduce” like it's the most cringe-worthy word in the dictionary makes me want to laugh. It's funny how much she reminds me of her sister. I stop myself from actually laughing out loud, of course. I’m not a complete asshole.
“I’m glad you don't hold me responsible, Alice. I wouldn't go so far as to say I’m innocent,” I say. “But the most important thing is, I didn't plan on any of this happening. I'm not the evil mastermind you seem to think I am. It all just happened. I love her, Alice. The last thing I want to do is to hurt her.”
“Please don’t hurt her. She’s a good girl. She acts like she’s strong — and she is — but she’s been through so much. You of all people should know. If you love her, you’re going to make it right,” Alice says.
“I promise you, I will.”
“To be honest, I wanted to tell her myself when you went outside, but then I…I couldn’t do it.” Alice lets out a burdensome sigh. Her gaze softens. “She needs to hear it from you, Cole. She deserves that. You know she deserves that.”
“I know, Alice. I promise you I’ll make it right. I was already planning to tell her.”
We stop talking when Emily comes back. Her eyes are red and the skin underneath those eyes are dark and puffy. The table is silent as we wait for the check, which I pay in full despite protests from both sisters.
“You can be the one to treat us next time,” I say to Alice as I place my credit card on the little tray with the check and hand it over to the waiter.
Alice replies with a terse “okay, thanks.” Then the table continues to remain awkwardly quiet. The atmosphere here is more somber than a fucking cemetery.
I wonder what happened here between Emily and Alice while I was away for a two-minute phone call. I have no idea what’s going on, but if there’s one thing I know, it’s that I’m not going to be the first one to break the silence. I’m not suicidal.
The waiter comes back with the credit card reader and some mints. From the way he keeps his voice low and quiet, I’d say he seems to sense the tension as well. Once that’s taken care of, we make our way across the mall and go straight to the parking lot.
“Take care, Em,” Alice says as she presses a button on her car key fob. An old Honda sedan parked nearby chirps twice in response.
“I will. You too.” Emily’s face remains expressionless. There’s no mistaking the signs of her having just cried, though. It’s obvious the conflict between the two of them is tearing her apart inside. It fucking kills me to know I’m probably responsible for this, too.
Once we’re in my car, I start the ignition and turn on the heater. It’s getting chilly and I’ve noticed Emily pulling on her cardigan a few times tonight. She’s looking straight ahead now, just staring into the distance with a blank expression on her face and water collecting in her eyes.
“Is everything okay?” I rub her upper arm.
“Yes.”
“Did something happen?”
“It’s nothing.”
“Can I help in any way?”
“I said it’s nothing.”
“Okay. Is there anywhere you want to go to now?”
“No. Let’s just go to your place.”
“Okay, baby. I love you.” I stroke her hair before I put my hands on the steering wheel and back up out of the parking space.
Fuck. She sounded like a robot just mechanically answering my questions. Alice told me she didn’t tell
Emily and I believe her, which means that Emily’s probably not angry at me — yet. But this reaction to whatever Alice said doesn’t bode well for when I tell her the bad news.
“Did you...have a chat with Alice while I was gone?” Emily breaks the silence with a hesitant question.
“Just some small talk,” I say, lying to her yet again.
21
Cole
“Are you sure we can’t see your father tonight?” Emily asks as we pull up into the parking lot of The Amber Room.
“One-hundred percent sure.” I turn off the engine and step out of the car as Emily does the same on the other side.
I can’t think of a worse idea than having my father and Emily share a meal together. The absurdity of the question almost makes me burst out in laughter.
After how badly everything went last night with Alice, I didn’t think Emily would want to repeat the experience, but she’s a stubborn one. She has no idea how much worse a dinner with my father would go. She’d be putting herself in real danger.
That’s my own fault for not telling her. I know. But I just need to buy some time.
“Well, can we see him some other time?” Emily insists as she takes my hand and we walk across the parking lot.
“Sure.” I let out a discreet little sigh.
Oh, we’ll see him alright. But it won’t be a fun little family get-together.
“It’s just family’s really important to me.” She looks at the ground and continues, “I know you probably wouldn’t think that after what happened last night.”
“Hey, if anything, what happened last night showed me how close you two are. I barely see my family outside of business dealings.”
“I’m sorry.” Emily tightens her grip on my hand, as if lending me support.
“You’re sweet,” I say. “But it doesn’t bother me. My family’s not super close. I’ve made my peace with that a long time ago. It’s not like I once had a tight-knit family and now I’ve lost it. This is normal to me.”