“Let me see your tits.”
I lose the T-shirt, palming both breasts and pushing them together. He watches, mesmerized as I tug on my nipples. Stroking his dick, he leans in, sliding it between my breasts. I let him fuck them, hands on top of mine, controlling the pressure on his dick.
“Fuck, your tits are perfect,” he says on a groan.
“I want your mouth on them.”
He obliges, hands replacing mine as he sucks a nipple into his mouth, forcing me to lie back. A cycle of nibble, suck, lick ensues, moving from one to the other. Tremors rock my body, pussy clenching with need. Reading my body like a book, he circles my clit before sliding a finger inside me. It glides in and out, his mouth worshipping my breasts.
“Please, Liam….”
He doesn’t make me wait any longer, slowly guiding himself home while burying his face in my neck. My back arches, arms and legs wrapping around him.
“Fuck, darlin’….”
“Oh, Liam,” I choke out, getting teary eyed.
“What is it?” He raises his head, staring down at me in confusion.
“You called me darlin’.”
Not only that, but this is the gentlest he’s ever been with me. This is not about him dominating or me submitting. It’s just us… Liam and Emily.
“That’s because I’ve lost all control when it comes to you, Em.”
Before I can respond, his lips are stealing my breath. He pulls out of me, pushing in with deep strokes, hand gripping my thigh.
“Harder,” I pant, scratching at his back. “Fuck me, Liam. I’m all yours.” He grunts, picking up the pace, thumb circling my clit. “Yes. Yes! Just like that!”
He takes my nipple between his lips again, and the added stimulation sends pleasure radiating through me.
“Oh, fuck, I’m gonna come!”
He thrusts harder, grunting with effort. The moment I fall apart, clenching around him and screaming his name, he shudders, going deep. When he collapses on top of me, I can’t hold back my giggle.
“What’s so funny, naughty girl?”
“Just that you went all the way home for the box and we didn’t even look at it.”
“Do you think we needed it?”
“Nope.”
As his dick slides out of me, he smacks my thigh. “Go clean up.”
After a quick trip to the bathroom, I curl up next to him on the bed, laying my head on his chest.
“What now?” I whisper.
“Now… now we do what we do. I can’t give you details.”
“I meant with us.”
“What do you want?” he asks after a pause.
You.
I rattle my brain, trying to think of something more eloquent to say. After all, English is my thing. He’s the numbers man, yet he never seems to have a shortage of words.
“Um….” I nervously trace a pattern on his chest with my finger. “Wanna come to dinner at my uncle’s place this weekend?”
“What’s the occasion?”
“No occasion… just—” I take a deep breath for courage. “—my parents will be there.”
His body goes taut beneath me. Shit.
“You want me to meet your parents?”
“It’s no biggie. Just dinner.”
“I don’t know, Em. Sounds pretty big to me.”
He shifts, moving me off his chest and sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to me.
“It’s just… we’ve been spending so much time together, I thought—”
“We talked about this, Emily. In the very beginning, I told you not to expect anything more.”
“Liam—”
“What do you want from me?”
The acid in his tone startles me. He’s never been like this with me before. I should have kept my mouth shut. What was I thinking? He’s right. I knew the deal going in. Why did I ever think he’d be interested in a real relationship? With me? As the tears gather behind my lids, I slide out of his bed for what I think is the last time.
“Too much, I guess.”
I grab some clothes, blindly shoving limbs into them. I need to get out of here.
“Don’t make me out to be the bad guy. You knew what this was.”
“Yeah, I did.”
“Emily.”
I don’t answer, only picking up my shoes and bag, heading for the door.
“Emily!”
His voice squeezes the air out of my lungs. Struggling to breathe and trying to fight back my tears, I soldier on. Before I can get there, Liam grabs my elbow, turning me to face him.
“Tell me what you want.”
“I want to go home.”
“Tell me what you want.” He places emphasis on every word.
“Fuck you!” I tug my elbow from his hold, but don’t get far before he’s blocking my attempt at a getaway. My eyes meet his, anger and confusion warring within me. “You want to know what I want? I want you. That’s the number one thing on my stupid list. You.”
Taken aback, his eyes widen. My words come rushing out. “I love you but I hate you and I need you but I don’t. You say you don’t want a relationship but you keep telling me I’m yours and I belong to you. You’re hot and cold and up and down and you… confuse me. I just….” I shake my head, trying to stave off the sobs. “I just want you to want me,” I finish, helplessness taking hold.
“You think I don’t?” he demands, voice raised in anger. “You think I don’t want—” He stops, reeling back in what he was about to say. He looks at me with what I can only determine to be regret. Whether it’s for what we started or what we could have become, I don’t know. What I do know is that Liam and I are over. I can’t continue with him knowing he’ll never want more than this. Not when my heart is invested. I can’t bear for it to be broken again. Not by him. There would be no coming back from that pain.
“I’ve been hurt. I’ve been degraded and ridiculed until I broke. I met you and you liked me even when I despised myself. You brought me back. You helped me heal. But for what? So you can leave me in more pieces than you found me?”
His gaze falls to the floor, ashamed to meet mine.
“I didn’t think I had any love left inside me, but you showed me that I do. Every little bit I can wring out of a heart I know still beats because of you… it’s yours.”
He finally looks up, face frozen and blank despite my meltdown. Despite the fact that I told him I love him.
“I can’t do this, Liam.” My hands rise and fall in resignation. “I thought I could, but I can’t. It was supposed to be fun. You weren’t supposed to make me fall in love with you.” He stares at me with that same expression, silence filling the room. “Please… just take me home.”
“You can’t leave—”
“Don’t fucking tell me what I can and can’t do. I’m going back to Uncle Jeff’s whether you take me or not.”
He stares at me for what seems like forever before he gives me a curt nod. He dresses quickly, following me out of the room. I try to hurry through the bar unseen, but Raven spots me.
“Hey, Emily. Where are you going?”
“Home.”
She takes one look at me, then gives Liam a disapproving stare. “What did you do to her, pendejo?”
“Nothing,” I answer. “I just want to go home. I don’t belong here.”
“Bullshit. I’ll get Gage. He’ll sort this shit out.”
She waddles off, cursing in Spanish, and I use the opportunity to make a dash for the exit. Liam follows, still silent. He doesn’t even glance at me while he straps my bag to his bike. As I climb on and wrap my arms around him—both for the last time—I shed the tears I’ve been holding back.
And not for the last time.
CHAPTER 19
***Venom***
“What the fuck did you do?” Gage accosts me the second I walk into the clubhouse.
“She wanted to go home.” I shrug as if I don’t know I just pushed away the best thing in my life.
&n
bsp; “Oh, and you just let her go? With everything going on?”
“I put the prospect on her.”
“What’s wrong with you? Yesterday you were ready to kill someone, and I’m supposed to believe you don’t give a shit now?”
“They want me, Gage. What happened to her is because they were trying to get to me. Well, they did. I’m doing what’s best for her. I won’t make the mistake of waiting until something worse happens.”
“Like I did?”
Shit. My words struck a chord with him. I wasn’t even thinking about Raven, but now I’ve pissed off my president.
“Prez, I didn’t mean—”
“We need to get to the warehouse,” he cuts me off. “Apparently Crow and Motor are coming back with a package.”
He leaves me with my foot in my mouth, rounding up the other men.
“Rico!” he shouts. “Find out where the prospect is and give him a hand.” He turns back to me, pointer finger aimed in my direction. “Get your head out of your ass. You either pull it out yourself, or I’ll do it for you.”
Sighing, I walk back to the courtyard to wait, closing my eyes against the memory of Emily sobbing behind me as I rode her home. Every tear she shed was like a nail to my palm, but a few tears now is better than her getting caught in the crossfire again. The next time might be worse.
After my promise to Jeff, I’m relieved he wasn’t home when I dropped her off. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to look either of them in the eyes again.
As Rico rides away, he gives me a look. Whether it’s disappointment or disgust, I can’t really tell. I want to kick his ass for it, but I know I deserve it.
We pile into one of the vans, needing to keep a low profile whenever we go to the warehouse. The men are quiet, but I don’t mind. I welcome the silence; it gives me the opportunity to brood without interruption. I should have ended things with Emily a long time ago. Better yet, I shouldn’t have started anything in the first place. I knew where it would lead.
I fucking knew.
But I let my dick do the thinking. I wanted her too much to pass up the chance to get inside her, and now she’s paying the consequences. Hopefully they’ll leave her alone now that I have.
Or have I made it easier for them to get to her?
Fuck my life.
No matter what I do, it seems to be the wrong thing. Not to mention I’ve pissed off Gage, which by extension means Einstein, too. I know it’s just a matter of time before he hears what I said, and he’ll also take it personally because of what happened with Ellen. Losing Emily, and both my prez and VP mad at me. How did I fuck things up so royally?
Is it even really my fault? I can’t help the family I was born into. This isn’t about the club; it’s simply a case of who I’m related to.
This time.
That’s what I need to keep reminding myself. Eventually something club-related will come up and she’ll be in danger again. And again and again. I need to be strong. This is the best thing for Emily. She’s better off without me.
Even if it kills me to let her go.
The van door opens, sunlight bursting into the dark cab. I hop out, heading inside when Gage unlocks the warehouse. We bypass all the cars and bikes he has parked inside, going through the hidden door and making our way downstairs to where we know Crow and Motor will be. Sure enough, they’re in one of the rooms, eyes glued to a woman sitting in the center. She almost jumps out of her skin when we enter.
“What’s this?” Gage asks.
“Vitalli made us,” Motor answers. “We lost him but grabbed her. She’s the one from the video, right?”
“Yeah, that’s her,” Tek confirms, slowly circling the woman.
“She said anything?” I ask.
“Oh, she’s been extremely cooperative,” Crow replies, handing a phone to Tek. “This is hers. She said the picture’s on there and she only emailed it to Vitalli.”
“Please,” she begs. “I’ll tell you everything I know. Just please let me go.”
“Why should I?” Gage steps forward.
“Look, you already know I took the picture, so I won’t try to deny it. That’s all I did, I swear. Luigi said he’d pay me five grand, so I did it. You know how long it would take me to make that kind of money on my waitress salary?”
“Don’t care.” I move to Gage’s side. He may be the president, but this is my fight.
The woman looks up at me, eyes going wide. “You….”
“What about me?”
“Luigi has something planned. I don’t know what it is, but I know it involves you. Your picture was on his desk.”
“What else?”
“I heard him and his men talking once. He tried to buy off the judge in Luca’s case and he didn’t bite. Said he’d have to find another way to get to him.”
Son for a son. Unfortunately for Vitalli, this judge doesn’t give a fuck about his offspring.
“What are we going to do about her?” Razor asks.
“Keep her here for now,” Gage answers. “Get her some food until I decide what to do.”
“I’m sorry for what I did,” the woman says to me. “I saw you with her. Can you tell her I’m sorry?”
“I think it’s a little too late to apologize.”
I walk away, the words as much for me as they were for her.
Before I can climb back into the van, Gage pulls me aside, his phone to his ear. “Stay with her. Both of you. I’ll send money for expenses.” He listens for a while, then replies, “Until I say so.”
“What’s going on?”
“Your girl is heading back to Atlanta. Packed up her uncle’s truck and they left a few minutes ago.”
“Oh.”
“That’s all you’re gonna say?”
“What do you want me to say? To do?” I ask in frustration.
“Man the fuck up! What happened to Raven, I didn’t see it coming. Regardless, I still blame myself for it every fucking day. You have an opportunity I didn’t. If you don’t do everything in your power to prevent something from happening to her, you’ll regret it for the rest of your miserable life. And trust me, you will be miserable, because I’ve seen you with her. My wife? She’s the only thing that makes life worth living. You think about that before you push Emily away forever.”
He leaves me staring at his boot prints in the dirt, contemplating his words. Somewhere in the recesses of mind, a voice tells me he’s right.
If only I could believe it.
***Emily***
Nervous.
Relieved.
Anxious.
Those are just some of the things I’m feeling as I walk into the courthouse.
Today’s the day. Today I’ll finally be rid of James Sinclair. Jesus, I’m glad I didn’t take his last name. It only makes this so much easier. I can’t wait for every trace of this man to be erased from my life.
“Emily?”
I cringe at the voice, turning to the owner with disgust evident on my face. “James.”
“Almost didn’t recognize you.” His eyes move up and down my body, making me cringe harder, if there’s such a thing. “You look good.”
“I know.”
My reply stuns him. I may look different, but I also have a whole new mindset. The broken woman he turned me into is gone. He probably has no idea how to handle the one I’ve become.
“Guess I can’t call you Miss Piggy anymore,” he says with a smirk.
“Guess not.” I shrug, my indifference turning his smirk into a scowl.
“Where’s your biker?” He tries to get under my skin once more, looking around.
This is the one area he can touch on that will affect me, and from the look on his face, he’s realized it.
“Get tired of you already?”
“You already know he’s not here or else you wouldn’t be standing here.”
“You know what he did to me, don’t you?”
“I only just found out. While I regret how he handl
ed it, I can’t say that about the outcome. You should’ve just signed the damn papers.”
“That why he left you? ’Cause you can’t handle his lifestyle?”
“If you must know, I ended things with him, just like I did with you.”
“I warned him, you know. Told him what a frigid bitch you are.”
“Just because you didn’t know how to handle me doesn’t mean he didn’t. FYI, he did.”
“Taught you a few things, did he?” He licks his lips. “Maybe you can show them to me when we’re done here.”
“As if I’d let you touch me again.” I scoff. “You’re just a memory I’m trying hard to forget.”
His blonde from the fight shows up next to him, linking her arm through his and giving me a dirty look. I turn to her with a saccharine smile.
“You know, the rumors are true. I traded up to a bigger, better model, and let’s just say I’ll never go compact again.”
I leave them with their mouths hanging open, sauntering toward my lawyer, Johnathan, who just entered the building.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it, bitch.
I was dreading seeing James today, but our little exchange taught me something. Sometimes the only way to move forward is to look back, to deal with the things in your past. I believe he has been effectively dealt with.
We don’t have to wait long before our case is called. James and his woman side-eye me the entire time, but I remain focused on the proceedings. I didn’t want anything from him. He’d already blown through our joint savings, and since I sold my car, all that was left was the house and everything in it. I let him have it all and didn’t even ask for alimony. All I want is to be free. When the judge bangs his gavel, I almost leap for joy. Johnathan turns to me, shaking my hand.
“Well, Miss Pierce, you’re a free woman now. What’s the first thing on your agenda?”
Renascence: Death Dealers MC Book 5 Page 22