by Hattie Mae
“What about her husband?” Wilson asked.
“What husband?” Sam asked.
“The one that Ruth told me about. The one I saw for myself when I went to the plantation she and her husband worked on. I saw Odelia and this man laughing with each other. It tore my heart out, but it also pleased me that Odelia had moved on and was happy.”
“The only other man to live with Odelia at the plantation was her distant cousin Charles, and he passed maybe five years now,” Sam said.
Rose could hardly get words out of her mouth. “What does my mother have to do with this story?” Rose’s heart was racing. If her mother had ruined her aunts’ life like she had ruined hers, she didn’t know what she would do.
Wilson dropped his head. “I can’t believe that I messed everything up. After I was injured and knew I would never be the man that left for the war, I felt sorry for myself. They didn’t think I would walk again. It took a very long time before I took my first step. I couldn’t go back to my sweet Odelia. She was so full of life and deserved so much. And after I did the unforgivable, I guess I wanted an excuse not to face her. My only joy in life has been the knowledge that she was happy. But now I see she has hurt most of her life just as I have. What a fool I’ve been.”
“Then come back with us, Wilson. Tell her the whole story. It’s not too late for you. Please come back with us,” Rose begged.
“I can’t. And please whatever you do, don’t tell her you found me. Some things are better left alone. As far as Ruth, it’s not my place to tell her story. You need to talk to her. But you will never know how happy I am to have met you.”
Rose and Sam said their goodbyes, as rain began to fall. Rose fell in the stranger’s arms and held on for dear life. He hugged her as tight as she hugged him. Before he let her go he whispered in her ear, “You are nothing like your mother, Rose. You are a beautiful woman, just like my Odelia. Please keep in touch.” Wilson yelled out as they got into the truck. “Take care of her Sam, real good care of her.”
Rose got on her knees and gazed at Wilson through the back window as he clutched the letter she had agreed to leave him. Tears fell down his cheeks as steady as the rain down his face.
“He’s just like Aunt Odelia described him. And he still loves her so much. You can see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice. I know deep down my mother had something to do with what happened. She can be so evil, Sam, so very evil. I don’t think I’ve ever been so sad.”
Rose thought her heart stopped as Sam reached over and took her hand in his. Touching her, offering comfort. Her body tingled even if she knew he was just being kind. She pulled his hand up to her lips and kissed it ever so softly. She held it there against her chest and closed her eyes.
Sam was taking deep breaths, when he tore his hand away and turned sharply onto a dirt road on their left.
“What happened? Why are we on this road?” Rose asked.
“Didn’t you see? A black cat crossed the road right in front of us. We can’t travel that road now. This road will take us back on our way.”
The truck slipped and slid as Sam struggled to keep it out of the ruts filled with mud and rainwater.
“You and your superstitions, Sam. Look at the bad luck we’re having now, and a black cat didn’t cross this road.”
Sam gritted his teeth. He couldn’t help his superstitions. He knew logically they were wrong, but they’d been such a big part of his life.
The truck came to a sudden stop with the left tire stuck in a hole.
“Stay in the truck.” Sam stepped down into the sticky mud and searched for sticks and logs to place under the wheel. When he turned around, Rose was standing beside him, her arms full of branches and sticks. Mud dripped from her blouse and her hands were covered with the dark oozing mess.
“Look at you. Do you ever take orders?”
“Oh be quiet. Start the truck and see if you can work it out of this rut, and I will shove more branches under the wheel.”
“No way am I going to let you do something so dangerous.”
“I’m not a helpless little girl. Get your butt in that truck. I want to go home and clean up. I’ve had a very emotional day.”
“You are a very stubborn woman, Rose Ferguson. A very stubborn woman.”
Rose caught the smile cross his face as he turned around.
Sam started the truck, and Rose stood to the side shoving branches under the wheel. The tire finally caught solid ground and spun, sending mud specks over Rose’s face and body as the truck lunged forward and was free.
Rose slid onto the seat of the truck to the sound of Sam’s bouts of laughter. “Rose, you look pitiful.”
Sam took a rag out of the glove compartment leaned over and started cleaning her face. Rose knew that look, he was looking at the mole on her face again. His lips covered hers, softly at first, questioning. When she didn’t pull back, his need increased, deepening the kiss and pulling her to him. He released her lips when she started crying.
Sam released her and fell back against his side of the truck. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to force myself on you like that.”
Rose began to breathe in short spurts. “You did nothing wrong.”
Sam’s hands were gripping the steering wheel, “You’re crying, Rose. I did something.”
“Yes, you did something all right. I’ve never been kissed like that before. No one has ever made me feel so needed. You did everything right.”
They sat in silence. The rain had started up again and was pelting the truck. When Sam put the truck in gear and put his foot on the gas, it gave a little jump and slid again. “We have to get to solid road.” He coughed and, without looking at Rose, his words came slow. “Let me get us safe and then we will discuss what just happened.”
The drive gave both of them a time to think. That kiss meant something, Rose was sure. No one kissed another like that unless it meant something. Could it be that Sam cared for her, just a little? She couldn’t get her hopes up, she’d been down that road so many times, and was always disappointed. And the concern in his voice made her think maybe disappointment was what he really felt.
Once again on a paved road, Sam cleared his throat. “Rose, I’m sorry. I had no right to kiss you like that. Men have used you all your life, and I refuse to be one of them. I got caught up in the moment. You deserve someone that feels deeply for you. And I don’t know what my feelings are at the moment. Maybe all I’m feeling is loneliness and lust, and that would never be enough for you. Let’s put that kiss behind us.”
Rose sat next to Sam listening to the rain and the wipers as they swished water from the windshield. They seemed to whisper “fool, fool.” Why was she surprised? What made her think that Sam would be different? Well, it didn’t matter. What was the big problem? It’s not like she had fallen in love with him? Had she?
Rose bent her chin down where he couldn’t see the hurt and the sense of betrayal, and maybe to give her self-esteem time to return. They would be home soon, and she’d be able to avoid him. She needed time to be alone. To reflect on what today really meant and to forget that kiss; Sam had.
She forced her mind to something else, but the next thought caused her as much pain. What did her mother have to do with keeping Wilson and Aunt Odelia apart? Did she do it out of spite, or just meanness? Rose intended to find out.
CHAPTER EIGHT
“What in the world happened to you two? Did you have an accident?” Aunt Odelia fussed over Rose and Sam like a mother hen.
“The truck got stuck in the mud, and Rose helped me get it out. That’s all.” Sam’s hooded eyes held Rose’s in their gaze. “No one got hurt, right, Rose?”
Rose tilted her head and tore her eyes away. “Everyone is fine, Aunt Odelia. Nothing a good hot bath won’t cure.”
“Did y’all eat? I made the best gumbo. It won’t take a minute to heat. I will not take no for an answer.”
Rose turned to walk up the stairs, and Sam caught her arm.
“Do you want me to leave?”
“Of course not. But I won’t make you stay either. I still need you. For the girls, that is.”
“Then I’ll stay, Sam. For the girls, that is.”
In her room Rose touched her lips. Why, Sam? Why don’t you care for me? Rose dried her hair threw on sweats and a cozy shirt and decided to eat in a hurry and maybe she would be through before Sam came back down.
“Sam decided to eat his gumbo before he cleaned up. He’s upstairs reading to the girls. Said to tell all good night. He looked beat.”
Rose listened to Odelia talk as she forced herself to eat the bowl of gumbo. All she wanted was to turn in for the night and start fresh in the morning.
Sam sat in the rocker on the galley outside his room. Idiot. He knew how vulnerable Rose was, and yet he couldn’t keep himself in check from taking her into his arms today. Nothing had ever felt so right and tasted so sweet. But after Lisa, he had to be sure. Was he able to know a woman’s needs? Would she love him and Lizzy and Bea enough to stay? He had to be sure. A door creaked. If he stood now and went inside, it would look like he was running away. Best to face the music, they did have to coexist for a while longer.
“Can’t sleep, Rose?”
Sam saw Rose jump and put her hand to her chest. He remembered how soft her hands were when she so tenderly touched his face.
“Warm night.” Not waiting for her to reply to his question. “Sit for awhile.”
Rose sat on a rocker outside her door, keeping two rockers between them. He couldn’t blame her.
“Did you get all that mud out of your hair? We sure were a mess, all because of that black cat. I guess I didn’t cross behind it far enough.”
“Why, Sam?”
He didn’t want to talk about that kiss. He was trying to keep the conversation light. A chill went up his spine at the same time as heat crept into his face.
“Why the superstitions? I’ve never known someone our age so superstitious.”
Sam released the breath he was holding.
“I’ve thought about that a lot over the years and the best I can come up with is something that happened when I was a little boy. My mother would make up stories around a superstition. How I loved those stories.”
Sam stopped rocking and sat on the edge of his chair. “One night we were sitting on the gallery downstairs when we heard a noise. ‘That, my dear boy, is a screech owl.’ With a sad look on her face, she added ‘Someone will die tonight.’ She didn’t tell me a story that night, instead she took me on her lap, long legs and all.” Sam started to rock again, trying to gain control of his feelings.
“She held me a long time singing softly to me. She’d just had the twins about three months when she started to get sick. After I went to bed that night, I heard that dreaded screech owl again. I remember covering my head with my pillow, but I could still hear the owl’s cries. Mom died that night in her sleep. Since then superstitions have always bothered me. I know they’re not real. But just in case something goes wrong, I follow the rules.”
Sam shook his head and realized that he had been talking to Rose about something he never talked about. She probably thought that he was some kind of nutcase.
“I didn’t know, Sam. I’m sorry.”
“Oh no, you don’t. No pity. I’m going to turn in. See you tomorrow, Rose.”
Sam waited to hear Rose shut the door to her room but it never came. What was he thinking, sharing all his garbage with her? He knew by keeping the words flowing he would be discouraged from taking her in his arms again. He had tasted her lips and he could never go back to the way it was. Thank goodness he would be extremely busy the following days. But what would he do about the nights
After a restless night filled with nightmares of letters and lonely old men, owls, death and a little boy, Rose was spent. Maybe all of yesterday was just that a nightmare. She could almost make herself believe that if she still couldn’t feel Sam’s lips on hers. Well, she would not give it another thought. Sam had made it perfectly clear it meant nothing to him, and neither did she.
“Are you coming down for breakfast? Papa ate early and is already in the fields. Bea is in her room reading.” Lizzy paused to take a breath. “So are you ready to eat?”
“Yes, I am. Want some company, do you?” Lizzy’s warm little hand slipped into Rose’s, and together they walked down the stairs. Lizzy lifted Rose’s sprit. She could do this, pretend she belonged. After all, she was a pro at pretending.
“Odelia went to check on Susan, looks like we are on our own. I’m already late for my daily news so if you don’t mind, Lizzy I will eat cereal.” Preston grabbed his cap and headed for the door.
“We have Flower Crisp that we can only eat on special occasions, can we have some today, please?” Lizzy begged.
Rose gazed at the small girl all dark curls and sparkling eyes. “Let’s see, today is Monday and I am ahead of schedule on my book and I’ve never had Flower Crisp. Sounds like a special occasion to me.” Rose couldn’t hold back the laughter at Lizzy’s enthusiasm.
“Don’t be scared when your milk turns pink, it’s ok.” Lizzy jammed a spoonful of cereal shaped like little bright colored flowers into her mouth.
Bea joined them at the table, her look full of disapproval. “We’re not supposed to eat those, Dad said.”
“Your dad put me in charge and he said you could eat them on special occasions, and I’ve proclaimed this day a special event. So grab a bowl and chow down.”
“What’s wrong with you today? You seem different.” Bea asked as she took a small bite in her mouth.
“I guess I am different. I decided when I got up this morning I was going to enjoy this day. And nobody would cause a cloud to rain on my sunshine day.”
“What’s a sunshine day, Rose? Can I have one too?” Lizzy’s chin dripped the milk she drank from her bowl.
“When I was a girl a little older than you, and I’d had a horrible day, I would play this game with myself and create a sunshine day. All that day I would be happy, no matter what. And yes, Lizzy, you can have a sunshine day, too. Everyone can. It sure helps you make it through this world when you have your share of cloudy days. Now what do the two of you have planned today?”
“I’m not planning to do anything today,” Bea responded in her usual grumpy way.
Rose put her hand up and announced, “Okay, if you are going to share my sunshine day, I have rules. The first one is that you can’t be grumpy. And the only other rule is you can’t think about yucky stuff. So lose the attitude, Bea, and have fun with us. Lizzy do you have any plans?”
“I know, I know, a picnic. Lets have a picnic.”
“I’ve never been on one. That sounds fun. What do we do to get ready?”
“You’ve never been on a picnic? Where have you been on another planet?” Bea asked.
“No, I’ve never had the time, but I do now.” Maybe Bea was on to something, Rose sure had an out-of-this-world mother. Rose remembered she had questions for her, but not today. Talking to her mother would surely bring a halt to any sunshine.
“What’s all the noise? I could hear the three of you all talking at once. What’s going on?” Aunt Odelia entered the large kitchen, fetched her apron hanging behind the door and turned her ever-loving smile toward them.
Why couldn’t Aunt Odelia have been her mother? How different her life would have been.
“We’re going on a picnic. Come with us Odelia, please? Rose has never been. And this is her sunshine day,” Lizzy begged.
Rose and Odelia exchanged a knowing look. “I guess I could go for a while. But I can’t stay long. Where are we going?”
“I know a place,” Bea spoke up, almost sounding excited. “How about by the old saw mill. It’s always cool there, and dad built a table last fall.”
“The old saw mil
l it is. You girls go put on your tennis shoes and get something you would like to do while Rose and I get the lunch ready.”
Rose and Odelia spread out the tablecloth and set the food out. Something was on her Aunt’s mind and Rose was dreading the questions. She was trying to put her hurt and disappointment to rest for the day but the memory of that kiss kept returning no matter how much she pretended. The kiss itself might fade for a while but what Sam had said after the kiss would last a life time.
“Can you tell me what happened yesterday, Rose? You looked so sad when you returned.”
Rose’s bottom lip trembled. She tucked her head from view.
“I’ll tell you sometime, Aunt Odelia. There’s not much to tell and right now is not the time. Okay?”
The time together was perfect. Rose and Aunt Odelia played card games with the girls, ate cold roast sandwiches, and laughed until their sides hurt. Yes, this day had been perfect. It couldn’t have been better, even though Sam kept creeping into her thoughts and heart.
Aunt Odelia and the girls decided to make a batch of cookies and Rose headed upstairs to her room.
Following their meeting with Wilson, Rose had decisions to make. Should she tell her aunt about Wilson? Would it do more harm than good? Could it cause Aunt Odelia more unhappiness? Remembering Wilson’s kind eyes so full of hurt, pleading with her to keep his secret, was it her place? Rose needed to talk to someone. Someone besides Sam.
Of course, Susan.
The walk to Susan’s house helped quiet her fears. By the time she arrived, she thought she knew just what she must do. “Are you sure he’s the same man? Can you guarantee that he is Odelia’s Wilson?” Susan’s face was flushed with excitement. “This is so exciting, Rose. You found him you really found him.” Susan put her hand to her mouth. “If I can keep my mouth closed long enough, maybe you can fill me in on all the details.”
Rose laughed, as she sat across from Susan and took her hand in hers. She had become so attached to this kind, soft-spoken woman in such a short time. She and Trudy were like sisters to her.