by Shannan Rhys
None of the cowboys approached him this time. He was on his own.
And Ash wanted to fucking kill him. He sat very still while Aaron swore a blue streak, contemplating just how much he would like to rip Phillip Quade’s slanderous tongue right out of his mouth. Maybe watch him slowly bleed to death. There was not a death gruesome enough for that old bastard.
“You know we’re not allowed to do that,” Aaron spat at the old man as he climbed to his feet on his own. He was dumb as shit to keep getting up, which made him such a perfect throat-punch target.
“I am the alpha of my pack, and I decide how to enforce our laws,” the old man snarled back. “You have no business interfering.”
“You three need to get him out of my sight before I kill him.” Aaron pointed at the three closest men, but they just stood there, fists clenched, like they were being held against their will.
Helena was practically catatonic in Ash’s arms, clutching at him and whimpering like a kicked animal.
“Explain to me exactly what he did to her so I can fix it,” Ash said, settling his gaze on Aaron.
“You can’t fix it,” said the alpha with a sad look. “Only another alpha can fix it.”
“Can you do it?”
Aaron’s face was drawn and dark. “I can, but…an alpha bond has some similarities to the mate bond, Ash. It’s supposed to be for life. She will need to become part of my pack, which means…she’ll have to leave her life in El Paso.”
“Do it,” Ash said, nodding hard.
“She’ll have to live here, son.”
“Good.” He stroked her loose, dark hair, and set his jaw. They’d fix whatever was wrong between them. He’d do anything. “I’ll take care of her. You just fix her wolf.”
Aaron reached for Helena and both of them helped her to her feet. She was still clinging to Ash’s body, and he kept one arm around her as much as he could, keeping her stable and safe. He’d noticed that the hollow feeling was less intense when he was holding her, and he wanted nothing more than for that feeling to go away.
“Fine,” sneered the old man, who stood a few feet away, leaning on a tree, blood spilling from cuts on his face. “That whore bitch can be your problem.”
Something cracked inside Ash, and the rage spilled over so completely, he launched himself across the clearing and punched Phillip Quade in the throat. The man crumpled, and then Ash was on top of him, pounding him.
Kill him. Protect her. Avenge her. Kill him.
The world was red, and he just wanted to hurt this man until there was no more rage and no more blood, and Helena was safe forever. He felt hands on his shoulders, hands on his arms, but when he looked up, it was only Aaron VonBrandt. None of the black-clad Johnny-Cash wannabes had come to their grandfather’s aid.
Ash’s blood was pumping so violently, his breath coming so fast and hard, he thought he would see stars. But Aaron VonBrandt kept pulling him off, telling him to stop—not to kill the old man.
Phillip Quade had beaten his granddaughter down for years, bullying her until she didn’t feel she could make her own choices. Until she doubted Fate, the very thing the wolves seemed to rely on most.
Well, Tonya had said it was possible for someone to be made a wolf, and he would do that if it would make her happy. He would be a wolf. For her.
Helena listened to the yelling and screaming and crunching of bones. But she couldn’t move. Her only coherent thought was that Ash had left her. She was alone again on the ground.
“Get him off my property. In fact, get your entire fucking pack off my land. Wolves that would stand by and allow something like this to occur. I—” An incredibly angry growl tore from the VonBrandt alpha’s throat, cutting off his words. “You’re all worthless pieces of shit just like your alpha. Dammit, you didn’t stick up for your own kin. Get out!”
Helena gasped in shock. No one had ever spoken to her grandfather like that before. In El Paso, her grandfather’s word was law. Period.
Though people were scrambling and yelling around her, she lacked the energy to even open her eyes. She’d lost what made her wolf feel safe and secure—the alpha bond. No matter how painful being a part of the El Paso pack had been, she’d been grounded by her connection to the alpha. Now that was gone. Tears rolled down her cheeks in a fresh wave of pain and anguish.
“Hey, baby,” Ash’s voice wrapped around her broken soul before she felt his hands take hold of her. “I’m never leaving you again. You hear me?”
Other hands joined Ash’s, supporting her. But she didn’t think she could ever feel whole again. Not without her pack. No wonder they had been so up in arms about one unbonded wolf. It would be devastating.
“You said you could fix her.” Ash’s voice carried the same pain and emptiness she felt inside. He could feel her the same as she sensed him. But how could she possibly be fixed? Her grandfather would never take her back.
“Give her to me,” Aaron said, his voice gentle, reminding Helena of her father. “Just for a moment.”
Ash relinquished her to Aaron.
No. Wait. She wanted to cry out, but the words stuck in her throat. Ash had said he wouldn’t leave her. Why was he giving her over to Aaron?
Ash. She tried again, but nothing more than a mournful whimper escaped. She didn’t want to see her grandfather again, so she kept her eyes tightly closed. Aaron had told him to leave, but that didn’t mean he was gone yet.
Magick swirled around her, wrapping her up like a warm blanket on a cold day. Aaron was saying something. Something in the old language the bond spell used. The warmth on the outside changed and slipped beneath the surface of her skin into her soul. Into her wolf. The hole her grandfather had made was being filled. Something miraculous was happening. She was being given another pack. A new alpha.
She opened her eyes and sucked in a deep breath. Aaron’s golden pupils stared back at her. His hands squeezed her upper arms gently, reassuring her and giving her strength all in the same moment. “Welcome to Somewhere, Helena Quade.”
A sob tore through her chest and she nodded, still unable to get her tongue to cooperate and form the words she wanted to say. But her wolf was no longer alone. No longer writhing in anguish.
She turned her head, feeling Ash nearby, needing to touch him again. Needing to see that he still wanted her. Needing to tell him how much she wanted him. There he was, just standing there and staring at her, his eyes full of worry and pain…and love.
Helena lunged for him, ripping away from Aaron. Throwing her arms around Ash’s neck, she said, “I’m so sorry. Gods, I’m so sorry.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Helena sobbed and apologized, and all he could do was hold her. He never wanted to let go. Something had changed inside her—and him—after Aaron said the words of that spell. The gaping hole that had been opened up inside her had finally closed. He was glad for that, at least. Truth be told, from what he’d seen of the Quade family, it was probably better for Helena to be trapped here with a human mate than it was for her to return to El Paso.
The black-clad cowboys dragged away their unconscious alpha, having apparently been released by whatever held them back. Ash leered at all of them. One of them—a big, blue-eyed, dark-haired lunk with blood all over his shirt—looked like he wanted to approach Helena, but Ash shook his head and the guy backed off.
She’s mine now.
And he was hers. All the way.
Aaron touched Helena’s head affectionately, like a father, and put his other hand on Ash’s shoulder. “As a bonded pair, you’re my responsibility now,” said the alpha. “You’ll both be cared for. Whatever it takes.”
Ash nodded and continued to stroke Helena’s hair as she clung to him. She turned to her new alpha and whispered, “Thank you. Thank you, Aaron. I didn’t… You didn’t have to do that for me.”
“Yes, I did,” he said, giving her a sad smile. “If I hadn’t, you would’ve been left with that gaping feeling your whole life. Though you could have trained yoursel
f to ignore it for the most part, it always would have been there, like a gaping hole inside, and you wouldn’t have been the same. That is, assuming we could protect you from the Rangers.”
“Thank you,” Ash said, cradling his mate against his chest. “I don’t know how we can ever repay you.”
“Well, you’re part of my pack now.” Aaron clapped him on the back. “So you won’t have to repay me. It’s my job as alpha to take care of my pack.”
The bearded man walked away, like that was the last word he had to say on the subject. Perhaps he wanted to give them time alone to talk. Or maybe he was just eager to get back to his waiting wife.
He looked around the forest. It was still relatively dark. The sun would likely not be up for another half an hour or so.
“Should we go back inside?” he asked, tentatively. “I’ve laid claim to a nice, quiet couch.”
Helena shook her head, sniffing and pulling away from him. “The wolves will all be coming back soon, and there are more members of my pa…my old pack…who will be coming back. I’m close with some of my cousins, but I don’t want to see them right now.”
“That’s understandable.” Ash walked with her past the still-bloody patch of ground where he had pummeled Phillip Quade. Past the little set of bushes that had hidden Helena from him at first. Past the treeline and out onto the lawn.
Walking toward them, coming from off to their right, was the big, naked sheriff. He covered his privates with his hands when he saw them, and nodded at Ash.
“I see you found yours,” Allan said, darkly, looking around the yard.
Ash gave him a chuckle and wrapped his arms around Helena. “I found mine.”
“You haven’t seen mine around here, by any chance, have you?” the sheriff asked, looking around the big, wide yard. “I tracked her out this way, but with all the other jackasses wandering around, I lost her scent. She’s about so high.” He held his hand up to his armpit. “Long black hair, generally pissed off.”
“Oh, I did see a chick sleeping by the barn.” Ash pointed off to his left. “She seemed knackered. Didn’t even hear me when I approached.”
Allan looked toward the big red structure. “Yeah, well, she was…up all night, both last night and tonight. I’m sure she needs to rest…”
“Go get your girl,” Helena said, her voice quiet. “She’ll want to wake up for you.”
With a dark look, the sheriff groaned. “You clearly don’t know her.”
“Oh, she will.” Helena’s nod was so certain, it tugged at Ash’s heart. “For her mate?”
Allan still looked unconvinced, but Helena slipped out of Ash’s arms and put her hand on his muscular shoulder. A little sliver of jealousy slid into Ash’s skin and he took in a long breath to quell it. She was just comforting the man.
“A wolf will always want to see her mate. Even if she’s mad at you. Inside, she won’t be able to help it. That’s the way Fate made us.” Sadness underlaid her tone, and that cut Ash to the core.
She sounded like she regretted her own mate. It broke his damn heart. Stupid heart. He felt like slinking off into the darkness and leaving them to their commiseration.
“I’ll have to take your word on this one,” Allan said on a sigh. “I never planned on a wolf mate.”
“I never planned on a human mate,” she said, slicing into his heart again.
“Well, it’s good to have the wolf perspective, at least.” Allan took a step toward the barn, breaking contact with Helena’s skin. Ash felt the possessiveness rise up again, and he wanted to draw her close and never let her go.
But not against her will.
If she didn’t want a human mate, despite the feelings Fate had foisted upon her, he wouldn’t force her. He’d make his offer to turn for her, and if she didn’t accept, he would still take care of her from afar. Be hers from afar.
“Go get your girl,” Helena said, turning back to Ash with a sad smile.
He couldn’t smile back. Not right now.
The sheriff strode across the lawn, leaving them alone. As Ash moved toward the house, other couples started to emerge from the forest, near where Allan had been. More of the wolves were returning. Some were clothed. Some were naked. Some may have even overheard Helena’s interactions with her grandfather. He needed to get her away. That’s what she’d asked for.
“Go wait in my truck,” he said, pulling on her hand and pointing toward where he’d parked the previous night. “It’s unlocked, but I have to grab my keys from the house.”
She followed, keeping hold of his fingers. “Can I go with you?”
“Just let me get my keys,” he said, a little more gusto behind his words this time. “I’ll be at my truck in just a second.” He took off running, needing some distance. Her body betrayed how much she wanted his hands on her, but her emotions were still at war inside her. And her words said she didn’t want him. Over and over and fucking over.
When am I going to learn?
He felt her disappointment cloud his mind as he ran toward the house. He was so confused by her, it was hard to breathe. He wanted her so much. He already knew he loved her. Whether it was Fate directing him or not, he knew how he felt.
But she didn’t love him. And he was going to have to learn to live with that. It wouldn’t change him, or his determination to keep her safe, or his devotion to her. He already couldn’t imagine life without her. He knew he would always be checking with their bond to see how she was when he was away from her. Hell, he was only a few hundred feet off, and he was already doing it.
He lumbered up the porch and through the front door, which was unlocked. In retrospect, it wasn’t that surprising: what person in their right mind would break into the VonBrandts’ stronghold? No doubt, because there was a big gate outside, and security apparently up the ying-yang in other places. Plus, the alpha seemed to want to welcome having people in his house. It was an interesting place, this VonBrandt ranch.
Ash grabbed his keys and phone. The boot caught his eye. He could hardly believe he didn’t need it anymore. He’d been in pain for so long. His sock was dirty from being traipsed all over the yard, but the foot underneath was completely healed. Miracle.
Helena was a miracle. He couldn’t let her go. Not if there was even a chance she would love him back.
As he was leaving the house, he heard a quiet voice call out his name, and he turned to look up the big, wide staircase leading from the foyer to the second floor. Kara was standing at the top in a tank top and shorts, her blonde hair hanging over her shoulder.
“Are they coming back?” she asked in a groggy voice.
“They are.”
“And Helena?”
“She’s waiting in my truck.”
Kara smiled. “Luke will come find me in his old room. It’s a game we like to play, where I pretend to be asleep, and he—” She pressed her lips together, raising her brows. “Well, let’s just say, there are benefits to being the human mate of a wolf, and one of them is post-run sex. It is the best sex imaginable.”
Ash tried to return the smile, but he wasn’t quite there yet. He and Helena had plenty to work out before they were at the leaping-into-bed-after-a-run level of the relationship. Besides the whole issue of her not wanting a human mate, they still hadn’t discussed the another-guy’s-hand-on-her-boob-and-butt incident. He was so not excited to bring that up.
His nostrils flared with emotion, but he tried to shake it off, not wanting to bother Kara.
“I’ll have to take your word on that one,” Ash said.
Kara was just about to say something when Helena’s voice cut in. “Ash? Are you coming?”
Helena appeared at his side, dressed in her black clothes again—which was too damn bad, since she’d looked hot as hell in that shirt. Her features were concerned, and he realized he’d forgotten it was a two-way bond. His anxiety must have filtered through to her. He stepped aside and introduced her to Kara, ending with, “She’s one of the moon widows.”
“Moon widows?” Helena asked, slipping her arm around his waist.
“The humans who have wolf mates,” Kara explained, coming down a few steps so she could offer her hand to Helena.
His mate took the handshake, her lips tight. “Ah. I see.”
Ash felt a stab of frustration edging through her, and he let out a long sigh. “We should get going, Kara. Thanks again for the talk last night. I’ll see you later.”
“It was nice to meet you, Helena,” Kara called out as they left. “He speaks very highly of you.”
“Nice to meet you, too,” Helena said, and Ash closed the door behind them.
“We should get back to town, unless you changed your mind about wanting to stay here this morning,” he said, taking her down the steps toward his truck.
“No, I don’t want to stay here. Can you take me to that place with the waffles?” she asked in a small voice. “I haven’t eaten in almost twenty-four hours.”
“That, I can do.” He opened the truck door to usher her inside, but she lingered in the open doorway, squeezing his hand.
“Thank you, Ash,” she said, looking into his eyes.
“For what?” he asked, a little dumbfounded by the rush of desire flooding through him.
“For finding me.”
He closed the door, letting his hand trail along as he walked around the back of the truck. In a low voice, he said, almost to himself, “I’ll always find you.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
The ride from the VonBrandt ranch into town couldn’t go fast enough. Ash’s disappointment and confusion and pain had urged her to find him inside the house. She hated that he felt so alone…like she’d felt. She’d never wanted to hurt him. She loved him, dammit.
But she didn’t want to explain that in the car. No, she wanted to look at him straight in the face when she said those words. Her head was such a confusing place to be at the moment: she was still adjusting to the new alpha bond. Adjusting to the realization that she wasn’t returning to El Paso. While she would never have to deal with her grandfather ever again, her heart was broken by the thought that she likely wouldn’t ever see the rest of the pack, either. Her cousins were like sisters to her.