by Sadie Moss
And the test isn’t just on the past two weeks of material. It covers everything that’s been touched on since the beginning of the semester, and I wasn’t here for that. I tried to study the notes Roxie left behind in her room, but those were only sort of helpful.
When I get my grade back, I want to burst into tears. I haven’t felt so stupid in ages. Maybe never. I just want to curl up into a ball.
There’s a note attached to the test:
Please meet me in my office after class. ~ Kasian
Oh, great. He’s gonna tell me I’m failing the class.
I think I might throw up.
Chapter 11
I spend the rest of the day in a low-level panic.
Oh, God. I have to have a talk with Kasian about how I’m failing—and of course it couldn’t be with Angelique, or with just a normal professor. Nope, it has to be with the one person my alternate self hooked up with because that’s the kind of bullshit I’m dealing with in my day-to-day life now.
Bianca asks me at lunch what’s got me so jittery.
“I have to meet with Kasian, the TA for my History of Magic class,” I explain, shoving my food around on my plate. I don’t tell her why—I don’t want her to know I bombed the test. Bianca’s made it clear to me that Roxie is a stellar student, top of her class. She’ll be suspicious if she finds out I’m suddenly failing.
“Ooh,” Bianca purrs, sounding delighted. “He wants to go for round two with you! Ha!”
“I’m sure this isn’t—” I swallow, heat rising inside me along with a fresh wave of nerves. “This is strictly professional.”
“Uh huh.” She folds her arms, tossing her long, dark hair over her shoulder. “Sure it is. You gave that boy the hottest night of his life, you were the first goddamn student to get with him, and now you think he just wants to go back to being student and teacher? Hell no. Unless by ‘student and teacher’ you mean some hot roleplay—”
I can feel my face burning. I must look like a damn fire hydrant right now. “Well, I’ll find out later, then, won’t I?” I hiss, cutting her off.
Cross is also curious about it when I tell him later. “Are you going to go?”
“I have to. It would look suspicious if I didn’t, seeing as I just flunked the damn test,” I reply with a groan. “He’s going to know something’s wrong or he wouldn’t be calling me in, right?”
“Or he’s just a TA who’s concerned about a student suddenly dropping in grades,” he points out dryly.
“He’ll know once I meet with him though.”
Cross sighs. “I’ll walk you, would that make you feel better?”
“I’m going to a meeting with a TA; this isn’t a dark alley at night.”
He escorts me to the office anyway though—because when he’s not being a jerk, he’s also weirdly protective—and when we reach the door, he pauses like he might say something.
I wait. And wait. And wait.
“Good luck,” he finally says, and then leaves.
Uh, okay.
That definitely wasn’t what he was thinking of saying, but before I can go after him to call him out on it, I hear Kasian’s voice telling me to come on in.
I swallow, straighten out my skirt—because the jeans I wore on the first day were pretty much the only pair Roxie owns—and step inside.
It’s a small office, since Kasian’s just a TA and part-time advisor. It’s clean and neat though, with some pictures on the walls, a small bookshelf that comes up to my waist height with various books on it, most of them about history. There’s a little plant in the corner that doesn’t look like any kind of flora I’ve ever seen, with red leaves and tiny flowers that look like stars.
The overall effect is nice—it’s like he’s really worked to make this place his own and to make it comfortable.
“Hey.” Kasian gives me a reassuring smile as I come in and sit down. “I’m glad you could make it.”
I nod, my heart in my throat, a shiver working up my spine. He really is damn handsome, and classically so—he looks like the kind of rugged guy you’d see as the hero on the cover of a romance novel, or an old-fashioned movie star.
Does he know I’m not Roxie? He looks a bit concerned, a little line appearing between his eyebrows—and it shouldn’t be as cute as it is, dammit. His gaze trails over me, and I suddenly realize that I’m sitting the way I sit, as myself, Gabbi.
I quickly straighten up and cross one leg over the other, lounging a bit. I like to think I’ve gotten a lot better at pretending to be Roxie, at least in her personality. She doesn’t seem to be a bad person, exactly. She doesn’t go out of her way to be mean to people or anything. She was—is—determined, hard working, and intelligent.
But… she can also be a bit of a spoiled princess sometimes. Roxie comes from money and prestige, and she’s used to getting what she wants. Used to people looking up to her. I don’t feel that way, never have, but as the weeks have gone by, I’ve managed to get better at pretending.
And I must be doing a good enough job to still be fooling Kasian, because he doesn’t bat an eye at me as he pulls out…
Some papers?
“I took a look at your homework over the last couple weeks,” he says. “And I never thought I’d say this about you of all people, but, Roxie, I’m concerned.”
Oh, holy shit.
He’s not calling me out. He didn’t summon me so that we could have more sex.
He’s actually concerned about my school performance.
Relief floods me like a wave of cool water in my veins. Thank God, I might actually be doing okay!
Well. Personality-wise. Academically, that’s clearly another story.
Okay, so, he’ll lecture me about my grades for a little while, and we’ll go from there. See if there’s anything I can do to fix this or improve it somehow.
I lean forward to try to get a look at the papers, which makes Kasian’s gaze flick down to my chest and then back up again, more heat in his eyes than before. Oh, man, I didn’t mean to do that—I had forgotten how low-cut this top is.
His face though, that look… it does things to me. I bite my lip, and Kasian’s gaze is drawn there too.
My heart picks up, my breath getting a little shallow. He’s hot, and a damn good kisser, and it’s been so long since I was with anyone…
Kasian clutches the papers like a lifeline, clearing his throat. His voice is a little rougher when he speaks, but his tone is almost formal, like he’s trying very hard to keep a wall up.
“I hope that this isn’t too invasive of me, but I talked with some other professors and got copies of your grades in the rest of your classes this semester.”
He lays them out on the desk so that I can see them.
“In some of your practical classes and your potions class, your grades are holding strong. But your professors reported that you were quieter, more reserved, less willing to volunteer. Professor Lapierre said your potions are good, but they’re lacking the personal flair you always used to add.”
Ah, shit. Of course Roxie would add a “personal flair” to them. She probably made them all smell like roses or something. All for that extra bit of credit and attention.
“In the other half of your classes though, you’ve been slipping.” Kasian taps various papers showing my lower grades. “Not just history. I’m really concerned. You were doing great up until these last couple weeks. And… the thing is, professors care. I know you all think they don’t. And it’s true that some are assholes. But we really do care about you guys. The problem is that most professors don’t have the time to do anything about those concerns.”
He looks up, his dark eyes serious. He always seems to have this quiet intensity about him that draws me in like a damn magnet.
“That’s why I’m here. I don’t have as many responsibilities as the full professors, so I can take the time to help you out, to figure out what’s going on. It’s not like you to just drop off in your grades like this.” Kasian g
ives me a warm smile that makes my stomach melt. “I was thinking I could tutor you, if you want.”
I try to keep up Roxie’s aloof veneer. She wouldn’t like it if someone offered to help her, I don’t think—she’d see it as a weakness if she accepted right away. “I’ve been doing great up until the past two weeks.”
Kasian rises from the desk, shoving his hands into his pockets and walking partway across the room, like he’s almost but not quite pacing. “Yes, but to drop off so sharply in just two weeks—I don’t know what’s going on, but I know I want to help. And, hey.” He crosses toward me, leaning back against the desk and putting his hand on my arm. “You don’t have to tell anyone that’s what we’re doing. I know you work hard, and you’ve got a lot of… pride.”
That’s a very tactful way to put it. But of course it is, because that’s the kind of guy Kasian is. He’s tactful and thoughtful and serious and sweet.
His thumb is rubbing circles along my arm, and even though it’s just a tiny touch, it feels amazing. I want him to touch me everywhere else too; I want to feel his large hands slide over every inch of my skin.
He looks down at me, his gaze warm and concerned. It’s maddening.
“I really do want to help. Will you let me?” he asks.
His voice is smooth and rich, his touch on my arm like a match to dry tinder, and something inside me just… snaps.
I jump to my feet, grabbing him by the front of the shirt. Kasian makes a small, startled noise, but before he can utter a word, I’m leaning in and kissing him for all I’m worth.
He groans in a mixture of arousal and relief and grabs me, hauling me to him. He slides me right onto his legs so that I’m straddling him, and I grind down frantically, desperate for pressure. Oh, God, he’s already hardening against me, dragging against me as I get wetter and wetter—
In a flash of movement, Kasian gets an arm around my waist and flips me, laying me out with my back on the desk and draping his large body over mine. The carefully laid out papers bearing the marks of my plummeting grades scatter around us, falling to the floor in disarray.
But I hardly even notice, because Kasian’s mouth is on mine again, and fuck, that first crazy-hot kiss we shared in the hallway wasn’t a fluke. This one is just as good.
No—it’s better.
His lips are full and soft, but the way they move against mine is hard and demanding, and the contrast is so incredible that I can’t stop. Our tongues slide together, and I hook my legs around his waist as I cling to him, tasting him, breathing him in. He has a cool, clean scent, like water lilies and rain, and it infiltrates my nostrils like a drug.
I tug on the fabric of his crisp button-down shirt, pulling it up so I can glide my hands over his lower back. His muscles flex and bunch under my touch, and he presses harder against me, the growing bulge in his pants grinding into me.
Then he suddenly rips his mouth away from mine, breathing heavily.
I let out a small noise of shock and frustration, lifting my head off the desk to chase his lips, but he draws back a few inches to stare down at me.
Oh, shit. This is the part where he comes to his senses and realizes we’re in his office, sprawled over his desk, and that we totally shouldn’t be doing this.
He moves again, and I expect him to step away from me. But instead, he reaches a hand out toward the door and makes a small twisting motion with his thumb and middle finger, like he’s turning a key.
The door to his office locks.
Okay, that is… super hot.
Chapter 12
I’m staring up at Kasian as he turns back to me, and the expression on his face makes me think that I was wrong earlier. He knows exactly where we are and exactly how stupid this is—he just doesn’t care.
Well, that makes two of us.
I’ve spent the past two weeks in the Hidden World freaking out on a daily basis, working my ass off to make sure I don’t get caught out for not being the real Roxie, and missing my family so much it feels like someone punched a hole in my chest.
Giving in to the attraction I feel toward Kasian is incredibly stupid. It’s dangerous. It’s everything I shouldn’t do.
But right now, I can’t make myself care enough to stop.
I need this.
I need it like I need fucking air.
Maybe the broad-shouldered man hovering above me sees that on my face, because something flickers in his dark eyes and he drops his head to claim my mouth again, almost bruising my lips with the intensity of his kiss.
My hands roam over his back, his shoulders, and the thick steel bands of his arms as he braces himself above me. When I run my fingernails over the short-cropped hair on his head, I feel him shudder against me, his kiss becoming impossibly deeper, hotter, and more desperate.
I’m still sprawled across the desk on my back, and when Kasian finally breaks our kiss, he takes full advantage of the fact that I’m perfectly laid out for him. His mouth trails over my skin, making goose bumps erupt in its wake as he works his way down the line of my jaw, over the jumping pulse in my neck, and across my collarbone.
The top I’m wearing is a tight teal blouse with a scooped neckline that goes all the way down to the tops of my bra cups. Kasian makes a pleased little growl in his throat as he follows the curve of the neckline with his tongue, making me arch against him.
I want more. I want him to rip the buttons off the damn thing and devour my breasts, to put that incredible mouth on my nipples and tease them until I beg for mercy.
But he doesn’t. Instead, he moves lower still, his large hands sliding along my thighs as he settles between my legs. My skirt already got bunched up as I wrapped my legs around him, but he shoves the fabric up even higher, completely exposing my panties.
I did a little online shopping with Roxie’s credit card right after I got here and ordered new underwear. I couldn’t change her wardrobe entirely without making people suspicious, but I drew the line at wearing my dimension-twin’s panties.
The ones I bought are a little less sexy and lacy than Roxie’s, but in this moment, it doesn’t even occur to me to wonder if Kasian will notice the difference.
I’m too distracted by the look on his face.
It’s pure hunger, a look so visceral and intense that it makes my hips swirl instinctively, seeking some kind of contact, some kind of friction, as my pussy clenches hard.
“Oh, fuck.”
Kasian mutters the words to himself, his gaze still fixed on the apex of my thighs as I writhe on the desk. Then he hooks his fingers on the waistband of the soft fabric of my panties and begins to pull them gently downward. I lift my hips a little to help him, desperate to get them off, and the second he slides them down my legs and tosses them aside, my breath catches in my throat.
I’m bared to him. Completely bared in broad daylight on the desk in his office. We’re on an upper level of the building, and with the way the furniture is arranged in the room, I don’t think there’s any way someone outside could look in and see us.
But Kasian can see me.
He can see how my hips refuse to stay still, shifting and circling as I try to find some relief from the pressure building inside me. He can see how my legs are splayed open for him, allowing him access to my most intimate parts. He can probably see how wet I am, how swollen and flushed.
He can see it all.
And he clearly fucking loves it.
His pupils dilate, the black expanding into the rich brown of his irises as his nostrils flare. His hands move to my thighs again, spreading my legs a little wider, giving his broad shoulders more room as he lowers his face toward my pussy.
And then he… kisses me.
There’s no other word for what he does. He puts his mouth on my pussy and worships it, his tongue sliding between my folds as his lips move against me, slowly and sensually.
“Kasian!”
I blurt his name in a harsh whisper, grabbing onto his head as a flood of sensations pour throug
h me. This feels almost more amazing than when he kissed me on the mouth, and I can tell he’s pouring just as much of himself into it, just as much passion and desire.
I have never had a man go down on me like this. I lost my virginity when I was eighteen, and I’ve been around the block a few times, but every time a guy has done this to me before, it always felt sort of like an afterthought—an appetizer he just had to get through before he reached the main course.
But Kasian?
He eats me out like I’m the whole fucking banquet, and dessert too.
His mouth feels like it’s everywhere on me, licking, sucking, and biting, his tongue teasing my clit before sliding over my folds, dipping inside me to taste my arousal. His hands are still gripping my thighs, and when he moans against my pussy, I feel it everywhere. The vibrations seem to land on a place inside my body that I didn’t even know existed, and I writhe under his touch, riding his mouth like I’ve gone insane.
I mean. I have.
This is one hundred percent insanity.
A rush of pleasure fills me, an ecstasy so sweet I have to bite my lip to ground myself. I feel like I might pass out or scream or just burst into giddy laughter from how incredible it feels.
Kasian’s gaze flicks up to meet mine just as I glance down at him, and the look in his eyes makes my breath catch. It’s everything I’m feeling, reflected back at me.
And it pushes me over the edge.
My hips roll against the silky pressure of his lips and tongue, and I push myself against his mouth, riding his face. His hands move to cup my ass, lifting me, supporting me, holding me up as I come apart beneath him.
Moans and whimpers escape from me, even though I’m pressing my lips together as tight as I can. I know I can’t scream in here, I know we have to be quiet, but, oh my God, I don’t know if I can keep it all inside. It’s too fucking much for my body to contain.