by Kotru, Umesh
While Dhatri remained glued to the spot where she was standing with a very sad expression in her eyes, Kunti reacted by rushing towards the cot and after picking up the kid showering him with kisses and soaking his clothes by her tears. It was a heart-breaking scene for Dhatri, who rushed to her mistress’s side to calm her down.
But given the avalanche of emotional outburst that then engulfed Kunti, she could do nothing except standing beside her mistress for comfort. She herself was suffering untold distress at the unfolding tragic scene in front of her eyes. The courage to say or do anything deserted her and she stood there like a statue, shedding silent tears. After a long time, Kunti was able to put her son to sleep and wipe her tears when she noticed Dhatri’s presence. This set off another round of emotional outburst; but this time, Dhatri was prepared and led her to the couch to make her feel comfortable. When Kunti was sufficiently recovered from the emotional trauma she said, “Rajkumariji, with utmost respect let me repeat the humble query which I raised earlier regarding the future of the newborn child. If you have decided to raise him as your son then his highness King Kuntibhoja shall have to be informed. We cannot conceal the fact for very long.” On hearing these words Kunti swooned on Dhatri’s shoulders. On recovering her self-control she said, “Dhatri, how can you be so cruel? Do you understand the repercussions of this news leaking out? My dear father and the whole family will not be able to show their faces to the world. I shall be subjected to untold misery for the rest of my life. It would be better for me to jump into the river Ashwa to end my troubles forever.”
Dhatri replied, “I was only trying to be practical. We have only two options. Either you keep the baby and prepare for the terrible consequences as you have just referred to, or abandon him.” While articulating the second option Dhatri could clearly see a temporary wave of anger sweeping across the face of her mistress, but she did not give vent to it. This passing anger gave way to another spell of distress and misery which broke Dhatri’s heart; but she maintained her serenity as this was the time to press home her second option. She continued, “Rajkumariji, we cannot delay taking a decision any more as that would complicate matters further. Cries of a newborn baby in the palace are bound to attract attention of somebody sooner or later.” “Dhatri,” said Kunti, “Is there a way through which we can keep my baby somewhere nearby and watch him grow? What is wrong with that?” “Dear Rajkumariji,” said Dhatri, “It is not a workable option at all, mainly because of the following reasons. Your baby is not an ordinary baby. His special features and extreme good looks will make him stand out among other babies of his age. He is a highborn prince by his very appearance and this fact cannot remain hidden for long. If he is growing up somewhere nearby, it would not be long before people start gossiping. Moreover how long would you suppress your motherly instinct and avoid having a look at your baby? Please don’t allow your motherly emotions to overshadow your power of reasoning.” Dhatri paused for a moment to let Kunti comprehend her explanation. She continued, “Under the circumstances we have no option except to abandon him and pray to God for his welfare and bright future. I have a feeling that he is going to enjoy a wonderful life in view of the special features he possesses.” After hearing Dhatri’s reassuring words, Kunti was gradually coming round to the practicality of the situation. But in the proverbial ‘a drowning person catches at a straw’ fashion, she made one last attempt to keep the child for a few more days. She pleaded her case before Dhatri as if the two women had changed places. “Dhatri”, she said, “I feel whatever you said is right and in my best interests. I am extremely lucky to have a well wisher like you. God bless you. I know you are also attached to my baby. Can we keep him for a few days more before taking the next step?” The instinct of a true well wisher was working inside Dhatri and in no time she saw through Kunti’s emotional appeal. She was scared of the consequences of agreeing to her proposal. She replied, “My dearest Rajkumariji, do you have any idea about what your words may translate into and the horrific repercussions involved in the move? Your baby is only one day old and you are not prepared to have him separated from you. I don’t challenge your love and affection for your baby. It is natural for every mother and nothing is wrong with it. But think about what will happen after some days when it will be simply impossible for you to live without your baby, as the parting shall be even more painful. My submission is that we should take the next step tonight without any further delay.” But for her mistress bursting into a fresh bout of sobs, Dhatri could see that Kunti was finally resigning herself to the hopelessness of the situation.
Chapter-3
The Castaway
Events of the last few hours convinced Kunti that her baby was going to be taken away from her that night. This made her extremely sad and helpless even before her own Dasi who, in turn, began to avoid eye contact with her for fear of being emotionally blackmailed by a desperate and distraught mother. Inwardly Dhatri wished that the newborn had been a legitimate child of her mistress so that she could shower both him as well as the mother with unbounded love and affection. Being practical meant that she had to complete all preparations for abandoning the baby after nightfall that very day. Meanwhile a highly depressed and dejected Kunti sat in a corner with her baby in her lap and did not utter a single word. Only her eyes were moving and following Dhatri wherever she was going in her room. Her brooding took her to her own early childhood when she was growing up in King Kuntibhoja’s palace, mostly in the company of her Dasis and their children. Her bubbly nature had made her the darling of not only the king’s household but her compatriots as well. She craved for that attention and wished she had always remained a child. At least she would have been spared the pain of taking her own decisions as at present.
Her reverie was broken by Dhatri touching her shoulder. She said, “Rajkumariji, are you alright? You seem to be sick and mentally somewhere else, away from this room. Otherwise you would have observed your baby playing in your lap.” Kunti returned to reality after a long time and observed her baby looking at her with beautiful eyes and a captivating smile on his face. She literally snatched him up from her own lap and hugged him crying and raining kisses on his cheeks at the same time. After regaining her self control sufficiently, she said, “Dhatri, how else do you expect an unfortunate mother like me to be? You expect me to be in the best of spirits? Why don’t you tell me and give your latest sermon as to how I should feel and how I should behave?” After giving vent to her frustration, Kunti went back into her brooding mode. Dhatri felt like crying but controlled herself as that would have further distressed her mistress. She said, “Rajkumariji, I am extremely sorry for my action. Please forgive me. Actually I have come to seek your permission for going to see the boatman to ensure that he has completed making the small boat and also if it is good enough to withstand a long journey through water.” “No!” cried Kunti, “you cannot do this to my baby. How can you be so cruel Dhatri? You are my childhood friend. Just come nearer and see his lovely face carefully and then suggest if he deserves the fate we are planning for him?” With this outburst at her Dasi she went into another fit of sobs.
Dhatri waited patiently for her mistress to calm down and then spoke, “Rajkumariji, I will never ever forget this divine face in my life. God knows how much pain I will undergo for the rest of my life for this action of ours in casting away this jewel. But this is the time for taking hard decisions of the head without succumbing to sentiments of the heart. The more we delay acting upon the decision we took yesterday the more difficult it will be for us to bear the pangs of separation.” She waited there for her mistress to react but she was again absorbed in her own thoughts with a blank expression. Her grief was too great for words. Observing Kunti’s distress, Dhatri concluded that it was futile to wait for a formal permission from her mistress. So she left the room, quietly closing the door behind her.
Kunti did not even notice that she was now alone with her baby in the room. She was shuttling between an acutely depressiv
e state and one where she was laughing and playing with her baby. Meanwhile, Dhatri quietly reached the boatman’s hut on the bank of river Ashwa and knocked on his door, which the latter opened promptly to let her in. After the door was secured, she enquired whether the boat was ready or not, to which the boatman replied in the affirmative. Since the night was fast approaching, there was nobody by the riverside. She expressed her desire to see the boat for herself which the boatman promptly complied with. Dhatri found the basket-shaped boat which he had built to be quite sturdy for the purpose for which it was meant. The only modifications she made were to put in some more cushions and rearranging the existing ones to ensure the baby’s journey was very comfortable. After satisfying herself completely, she reminded the boatman about the utmost secrecy to be maintained and she promised that he will be handsomely rewarded for his effort but severely punished if the secret got leaked in any manner. He was visibly terrified after listening to the threat and assured her total secrecy about his mission. Before leaving, she told the boatman to expect her back around midnight and also to stock some more flowers. By the time Dhatri left it was already dark.
Meanwhile Kunti’s condition was becoming more pitiable by the minute. Her whole life till then was flashing by before her eyes when the thought process got stuck on the day she met Maharishi Durvasa. In a flashback she observed herself being entrusted the role of looking after every need of Maharishi Durvasa by her father, with a warning that nothing should go wrong concerning King Kuntibhoja’s hospitality. Instead of feeling worried she was elated at the prospect of a break in her otherwise monotonous life where she had nothing else to do except spend her days in gossiping with her childhood friend and chief Dasi. That period of one year was passing vividly before her mind’s eyes, during which she won all-round praise from everyone including Maharishi Durvasa himself. This, instead of making her happy depressed her further, and she began to curse herself loudly for everything she had done, including the selfless service she had rendered to the Maharishi. “Why did I perform all that service to the Maharishi?” she cried, “By doing things imperfectly he would have cursed me. That curse would have been a heaven in comparison to the hell I am undergoing at present. Why did I accept his mantra on his last day here and not reject it as I did the day previous to that? I should have guessed that he would press me again and avoided his presence before his departure on one or other pretext. Why didn’t I reject the mantra outright and incur his wrath instead? That would have still been a bed of roses as compared to the bed of thorns I am sleeping on at present.” In a continuing flashback she saw herself doubting the authenticity of the Maharishi’s mantra despite Dhatri warning her to the contrary. The mere thought of that increased her frustration and pain. She mused further, “Why did I test that mantra despite doubting its genuineness? For me the punishment is well deserved but what has this little angel done to deserve such punishment and the stigma of probable illegitimacy and even possible death during his journey into the unknown?” The thought of possible death of her baby ruptured another emotional dam inside her, resulting in her crying uncontrollably. There was nobody in the room to console her. In her confused state, she once again decided to keep the baby and suffer the consequences.
In the meantime Dhatri hurried along in total darkness towards her mistress’s abode to find her in the same disoriented state as before. She did not put any question to Dhatri about her mission or anything else. Dhatri waited for some time for Kunti to break the silence but no such thing happened and this worried her all the more. Finally it was Dhatri who took the initiative and said, “Rajkumariji, preparations at the river are complete and the boat is also ready.” This produced no reaction from Kunti, except hugging her baby more tightly as if somebody was trying to snatch him from her. Dhatri waited for sometime before repeating what she had said earlier. This time her words produced an instant reaction from her mistress. She said, “I have decided to keep my baby irrespective of what people would say. You go back to the river and pay off the boatman and send him on his way.” Dhatri could not believe her ears but she decided to remain firm in making her mistress see reason.
“Rajkumariji,” said Dhatri while offering her water to drink; “Calm yourself and listen carefully to what I am saying. Yesterday, as you would recollect, we discussed this issue in depth and decided to give up this baby, leaving it for Providence to take care of the rest. Now you are saying that you shall keep this baby. Are you his friend and well wisher or worst enemy?” Kunti had regained her composure somewhat after drinking the water offered by Dhatri. She repeated the same assertion again by calmly saying, “What is wrong if I keep my baby?” Dhatri was happy that, at least, she has got an opening which she immediately seized by saying, “Rajkumariji, let me forewarn you that the baby will grow up with the stigma of being the son of an unwed mother, which will be worse than anything we are contemplating at present. At that time your repentance will be worse than what you are undergoing now. Regarding the other option, you will recall about a month back, when we were discussing about the future of your unborn baby, I mentioned about a relation of mine who lives in the village and is childless? But after actual birth of your baby, any idea of giving your baby for adoption in a nearby village does not arise, mainly on account of his special features and his inborn looks of a prince. It will make him too conspicuous and people will start gossiping, which is a risk not worth taking. Moreover, it would be very difficult for you to keep your curiosity of having a look at your baby in check. In the only remaining option there is at least a chance that some good family might pick him up and bring him up as their adopted son to fulfill his destiny. Do you remember what you told me regarding God Surya’s prophecy concerning his son? Trust him to take care of his son’s safety in the boat. It tears my heart apart when I say that your baby cannot fulfill his destiny living here with a stigma. You know how unforgiving our society is in such matters. That consideration in itself should suffice for you to see reason, even leaving aside the thought as to what will happen to you and your relations with your respected father and the society at large if you stick to your decision. It is getting late already and we cannot afford any further delay.”
Kunti seemed to have finally resigned herself to abandoning her baby and got up to accompany Dhatri on her mission. On seeing this, Dhatri got alarmed and asked her mistress as to what she was doing; to which Kunti replied, “I will accompany you to the river and see for myself everything and have a last glimpse of my dear one before leaving him to his fate.” Dhatri felt like bursting into sobs but managed to control her emotions in time. She replied, “Rajkumariji, please do me a last favour by not insisting on going and allow me to explain why I am saying so. If anybody recognises you, it will be a disaster of unmanageable proportions. My dear Rajkumariji, you have to cooperate one last time and everything will be alright. Then you can come out of this self-imposed exile of the last more than nine months. Time is the greatest healer of wounds. In due course you will overcome this trauma and hopefully, lead a normal life as before. Please don’t misunderstand me. I am fully aware about your pain and anguish. Now please give me your baby as it is getting late.” Dhatri was surprised at the hard tone of her own voice and decided to seek unqualified forgiveness from her mistress later, on completion of her mission.
The last two days’ events had drained Kunti of all energy and even her eyes were red and dried up. Her mind was completely blank and she was behaving like an automaton. She exhibited no resistance when Dhatri picked up her baby from her lap and quietly left the room, never looking backwards. Before knocking on the door of the boatman she covered the sleeping baby with her scarf, so that he did not see the special features of this baby and became suspicious. He had been told that the baby belonged to one of Dhatri’s fellow Dasis who was abandoning her for obvious reasons. As per the instructions of Dhatri, he had decked the boat with colourful flowers. Before placing the child among the colourful flowers and fully satisfying herself about the cus
hions etc. she stole a final look of the baby. He looked even more beautiful and divine under the moonlight and her heart missed a few beats and her eyes were filled with tears. She was tempted to take him back to his mother, but better sense prevailed and she started to place him expertly inside the small boat amongst flowers so that his special features were well-hidden and only a part of his face was visible from above. Meanwhile the boatman was tying the small basket-boat to his big boat with a rope, and on getting Dhatri’s command towed the small boat to the middle of the river, where the current was strongest, and set it adrift. Dhatri was silently shedding tears on the bank. The swift current took away the boat downstream and in no time the two witnesses lost sight of the boat carrying the child of Kunti and the Sun-god to his destiny, whatever that was going to be.
By the time the boatman returned to the bank, Dhatri had wiped her tears and regained her composure and confidence. Both of them entered the hut of the boatman, where he was adequately rewarded for his work and again warned to keep his mouth shut. A dejected Dhatri, with the last scene etched in her memory for ever, walked slowly back to the palace, the only thought in her mind being to avoid detection, which she successfully did.