by Sasha White
Apparently the dust still had some of Jerry in it, because it veered right towards Freddy. Before I could react he opened his mouth and the dust flew into him, every single mote. Then he pulled a flask out of his hip pocket, took a long drink, and burped.
He turned around, grinning, and winked at me. “A little dry.”
“What did you do? We have to get you to medical right away.”
He took another swig and wiped his mouth on the back of his sleeve. “Nope. Little zombie trick H.P. and Edgar filled me in on. Zombies can’t do the dusting, but we can indeed do the clean up.”
“Huh?” I had nothing better to offer. Two hundred years plus undead and this was a new one to me. Sexy Cindy and Jack landed, to use the term loosely. After they picked themselves up from the ground, I tried again. “What are you talking about?”
“Only matters in times like these, when you have an infected deader. I hadn’t understood what the others were talking about the other day, but once I saw what was happening, it became clear. Zombies are able to ingest carrier dust because we can ingest pretty much anything, other than certain kinds of salt, with no problem. Then we neutralize it with holy water.” He waved the flask.
“What the hell is carrier dust?” Jack asked. I was glad he did, since I didn’t have any idea. But I had a good guess.
“Jerry had something deadly to Victoria in him,” Freddy explained. “Meaning his dust was deadly to her. So, he’s infected, or a carrier of disease.” He chuckled. “And I’m the vaccine.” I was a good guesser. I was also happy I looked forward to learning new things daily, because this was a doozy. I wondered what else I didn’t know, even after all this time.
“Thank the Gods and Monsters.” Jack shrugged at my look. “Hey, not like you own the saying.”
I shook my head. “True. Freddy, you sure you’re okay?”
“Feel fine. If I start to feel evil, I’ll let you know.” He grinned again. “Nice to be useful to the team for once.”
“You’ve been useful before.” I hugged him. “Thank you.”
“Any time, Zombie Fred’s got your back.”
We went to the angels, who had de-cloaked. “You guys okay?”
They nodded. “What about you?” Cain asked. “You were the target.”
“Yeah, she was.” Jack sounded angry. “Why didn’t you do anything to protect her?”
I put my paw on his arm. “I’m sure Jerry had unholy water in him. That’s not exactly nectar to an angel. Besides, of the six of us, I’m more expendable than they are.” Jack started to argue but I put my paw up. “This is a war. We have military titles, remember? For a reason.”
Jack still looked like he was going to argue, but my wrist-com went off. “Vic, it’s Ralph. Status?”
“All fine here, I think. How’s the hospital gang?”
“Well, I’m released. I’m the only one, though.”
I resisted the urge to growl and curse. “How long for the others?”
He heaved a sigh. “At best, at least a good part of the day. Clyde had more damage than he was showing. He needs full rewrapping. The Count has to have a complete transfusion. Hansel and Gretel had to be knocked out to get treated. Those four won’t be out until tonight, maybe tomorrow. You want me to go on?”
“Not really, but I think I’d better know. Amanda, Maurice and Ken?”
“Okay, but they all have to sleep in their coffins.”
“Oh, that’s not good.”
“Why not?” Jack asked. “They’re vampires. Don’t they always sleep in coffins?”
Ralph’s low growl came through my wrist-com. He was touchy about humans buying into all the negative undead myths. I answered quickly. “No, that’s a myth, in a sense. They need to sleep in their coffins, in some dirt from the ground where they died, only when they’re close to becoming dusted.” My throat felt tight. “Ralph, are the others just as bad?”
“Yeah. The doctors told me they’d barely finished fixing up Black Angel Two and Martin when the rest of us hit the floor. They’re worried about them, by the way.”
There was nothing for it. “Ralph, we’re at the cemetery. Get here as fast as you can.”
“On it, W-W-One-Six-One-Two over and out!”
“Why are you bringing him back?” Jack asked. “He’s recovering, too. And he drives you nuts.”
“We need him. Most of our team’s down.” I looked at Martin. “How badly are the three of you still hurt?”
“We were released from the hospital, Victoria,” Martin said reassuringly.
“Uh huh. Ralph may indeed drive me crazy but I know when he’s trying to pass a message along. The hospital didn’t want to release you, did they?”
Martin tried doing the shrug and twinkle thing, but I didn’t buy it. I looked at Black Angel One. “And what Ralph was really trying to share was that you two didn’t get treated at all.”
Cain and Abel tried to look innocent, which, considering they were angels and all, they should’ve been able to do well. Only, angels have real issues in regard to lying – one of the reasons they weren’t a talkative group – it’s easier not to answer than to tell an untruth. Not that they couldn’t lie, it just took a lot of effort and most of them considered that skill not worth the work.
“That’s why you couldn’t hold me and why neither one of you could catch me when I fell. You’re both hurt.” I looked at the graves. “It’s why the five of you were having so much trouble keeping them in the ground, and why Jerry got free.” I stared at the graves some more. “The Adversary knows he hurt you and he also knows you weren’t fully or even partly healed. Jerry got out and he was dusted before he could tell us too much. But…why did the Adversary stop trying to raise the deaders?”
Miriam spun and did her raising spell. The ground moved and boiled, but nothing came up. Magdalena touched the moving earth of each grave. She shook her head. “There are no bodies in here anymore.”
I hit my wrist-com. “Monty, how’re you doing?”
“Not really well. Put it this way, it’s a good thing they have my arms stacked next to each other, or I couldn’t have answered you.”
“Ugh. I don’t want to know. I need an All Dirt Corps Alert. We need to know if any of our favorite recently raised deaders are anywhere around, on any plane, but most likely Undead or Human. Jerry the Junkie was dusted by the Adversary, but the others have disappeared.”
“Not good. Okay, I’ll alert the troops. Where will you be?”
I considered. “What day is it?”
“Pardon?” Monty sounded as shocked as those around me looked.
“Day. What day is it? I haven’t gotten a lot of sleep, or food, in the past I don’t remember how many hours now, and I’m not sure. Day of the week. Surely someone over there knows.”
“It’s Sunday.” Monty sounded confused. “Why does that matter?”
“You asked me where we were headed. And it matters because now I know.”
“And,” Monty said, like he was speaking to a crazy person with a loaded gun, “just where is that?”
“The Little Church of the Country.”
Chapter 44
Ralph arrived as I announced our destination. He hit a full stop and a salute. “Ready, Major.”
I tried not to sigh. “Ralph, we don’t have time for the formality.” Based on the glare he shot at Jack, I figured Ralph was going for the full on military bearing in an attempt to outshine Jack.
“Fine.” Ralph put his paw down but his body language was Ready For Action. At least he was eager. “Why the Little Church of the Country as our destination?”
“Jerry the Junkie was a little too involved and in the know. His father’s a preacher of some kind, and his family lives in the Estates. There are only a few men or women of the cloth who can afford to live that well.”
“Television evangelists,” Freddy supplied.
“Yep. And we have a couple who live in the Estates. One in particular.”
“The Right Reverend Gerald Joh
nson,” Jack said. “Called Jeremiah Johnson by most of his flock. Okay, I can see it, and I’ll just bet our favorite dusted junkie was named for his father.”
“I’d give it pretty even odds. Johnson controls a flock that consists of most of Prosaic City’s wealthy and also lures the poor and lower middle class.” The Little Church was also a total misnomer. It was huge and glorious – lots of glass, gold and silver plate, and reflective paint, along with many more spires than one normally needed for a house of worship – built on one of the hills in the Estates, so you could see it for miles.
“So, that would mean, since it’s Sunday morning, they’ve got a packed house and all the bodies they need, right?” Sexy Cindy ventured.
“That’s my current guess.” The base of my tail felt that Sexy Cindy was a keeper. I checked out the angels. “Much as I’d love to have aerial backup, I want the five of you back to the hospital. Monty, if they don’t show up within fifteen minutes, I want an All Being Alert on Black Angel One, Black Angel Two, and Martin. Brought in for extreme stubbornness.”
He chuckled. “You got it. I’ll alert the hospital staff that their errant patients will be returning.” My wrist-com went dead.
Martin shook his head. “You need us.”
“Yeah, I need you alive and well. Go get fixed up. If it’s that bad, I’m sure you’ll know.”
“I’m sure.” Martin sighed and nodded. “Let’s do as Victoria asks. The sooner we go, the sooner we’ll be released.” They all nodded to us and flew off. Slowly.
I turned back to the others. “Okay, we need a car.”
“Why not use your detective car?” Sexy Cindy asked.
“I have no idea where it is.” This was true.
“At Our Lady of Compassion,” Jack said. “Illegally parked.”
Oh, right. “Legally parked, and get over it. Too far away, and besides, we need a nicer car.”
“Why?” Freddy asked, as he looked around the cemetery. “I see no cars here.”
I sniffed and saw Ralph’s ears perk up. “There will be cars here shortly, and we need a decent one because we’re about to infiltrate the church where all the money goes. We need to fit in.”
“What’s wrong with our car?” Jack asked.
“Other than it screaming ‘undercover police’? Nothing.”
“I’m not going to human,” Ralph said flatly.
“Yes, yes, Ralph, I know. Werewolves Wear Their Pride. Got it.” I shifted to human and rubbed my forehead. “Fine. You’re a purebred wolfhound. Make sure you look all friendly and such, wolfhounds love people. But not for dinner.”
He gave me a betrayed look. “You’re going to put a leash on me?”
“If only I could. No. I’m going to brag about how you’re so well trained you can follow my verbal commands and hand signals. Unless I decide to just lock you in the car with the window rolled down a tiny bit.”
“Funny.” Ralph ruffled his fur. “But, undercover work isn’t always enjoyable.”
“No kidding.” I started walking towards the sounds and the smells. There was an early morning funeral going on. And happily, it was attended by several people with very nice cars.
There was a pretty decent-sized crowd for this time of day. They seemed to cover all walks of life, too, if the clothing was any indication. Not all the cars were nice – some had decidedly seen better driving days. I took a closer look at the crowd. They were in front of a set of big flower displays but not by any graves.
We took care to amble and look reverent. No rushing about furtively – that tells everyone you’re trying not to be seen. Look like you don’t mind being seen and no one pays any attention. I had to stop paying attention to the mourners and look for a suitable vehicle to “borrow”.
One of the cars parked the farthest away was a Mercedes S-Class. I was good with that. No one in the good parts of town would question anyone’s right to be there if they arrived in an S-Class.
The Gods and Monsters were on our side. The driver had left the keys in the ignition. Jack slid into the driver’s seat, I took shotgun, and the others got into the back. “Ralph, try not to rip the upholstery.”
“I only rip what I want to,” he muttered.
“Good boy.”
“You’re not funny, Vic.”
Jack chuckled. “Yeah, she is. However, I don’t think we should be stealing cars.”
“It’s in the execution of our duties.”
“It’s grand theft auto.”
“No problem, I’ll drive.”
Jack sighed. “No, let’s not add manslaughter, being-slaughter, destruction of public property, and reckless endangerment to the list.” He started the car and we backed away. No one seemed to notice we were stealing a hugely expensive car, though I figured that wouldn’t last long. As soon as we were out of sight of the funeral, Jack sped up and out of the cemetery. “So, you think we’re right about the Little Church?”
“Yeah. And the Prince and the minions love a good show. Plus, think about it – worldwide, televised audience. Great way to influence the masses, and not just the masses in Prosaic City. I’d say the odds are just too good that Jerry’s father is Johnson, and that the minions are with him in some way.”
“I agree,” Sexy Cindy offered. “His mom would come in a fancy car like this one. They make some real money at that church, I’ve heard.” From what I’d heard they made so much money that the I.R.S. always took a personal interest. However, Johnson was found clean, year after year. The possibility that he was a truly good man with a loser son was at least as good as the option that he was a manipulative scumbag who used the idea of God to control the masses and steal their money in a legal way. It wouldn’t matter to the minions – on the Prince’s side already, turned to the Side of Evil, or destroyed, that was their goal no matter what or who.
We wound our way through Prosaic City in some of the nicest luxury ever. “I could get used to this.”
“I hope we don’t get busted for grand theft auto,” Jack muttered.
“We’re cops. Taken in pursuit of a criminal.”
“We stole the car, Vic.”
“Details, details.” I was ready to go to sleep and the car was comfy enough to do it. I heard Freddy snoring softly behind me. My eyes closed.
They opened because a wet nose was in my ear. “Wake up,” Ralph whispered.
I was going to say something nasty but fortunately looked ahead before I glared at Ralph. We were at the Prosaic Country Club and Estates. But we weren’t going to be able to get in.
There was a wall of flame around the entire perimeter. I could tell because Jack was slowly driving past it. “Can everyone see that?” I asked. I could just make out the Little Church in the distance – the flames were obstructing my view extremely well.
“I see signs saying that entry’s forbidden,” Jack said. “But I think I see something else, like…fire?”
“Yes,” Ralph said. “It’s Hellfire.” He was growling. Not that I could blame him.
“I see it, too,” Sexy Cindy said.
“I as well,” Freddy confirmed. “But, how and why?”
I thought about it while we drove around in a big, winding, sort of circle. “How is simple. Abaddon and Apollyon are together. Hellfire’s the least of what they can bring to any party. Hitler’s got to be with them – the barriers Jack can see, and I can see if I focus, are warlock-created for sure. To keep humans out,” I added before anyone could ask.
“Why would they want that?” Sexy Cindy asked. “I thought they wanted to take over.”
“They do. But they don’t need all the humans to do that.” I was worried they already had all they needed in place and on the human plane. “Why is the real question.”
“What’s going on is the bigger question,” Jack said.
“Creating more dupes, creating a living zombie army, gathering hostages, mind-controlling people via the televised feed, the usual evil minion ploys,” Ralph said. “What’s going on is sim
ple – something we don’t want. Vic’s right, why is the real question.” His nose was still near my ear.
I shoved his muzzle away gently and got the sad puppy eyes. I did my best to ignore them. “I’ve got a reason for why, but I don’t like it.”
“Is there a possibility for a reason we’d actually like?” Jack asked. “Spill it, Vic.”
I took a deep breath. “The Hellfire’s there to keep us out, since we can’t safely pass through it. You could,” I said to Jack. “But only if you couldn’t see the Hellfire. You can see that there’s something else there, so it’ll hurt or kill you to pass through. Same for us. Demons and Golem can pass through, but the rest of us need more equipment than we have with us.” I remembered all our stuff back in the unmarked car. We needed to get back there.
“Is that the entire answer?” Jack asked shortly.
“No. Head for the OLOC. I want to dump this car and get our usual one.”
He muttered something under his breath but did as asked. “So? Why the Hellfire and why are we leaving?”
“They knew we were coming. That’s why the Hellfire’s up. Whatever they’re doing, they don’t want us disturbing it.”
“How could they know we were headed here?” Sexy Cindy asked. “We didn’t know until you said it.”
“I know.” I sighed. “I think we have a mole.”
Chapter 45
Ralph broke the silence first. “Who do you suspect?”
“Not sure.”
“You’re lying. You have a guess. I can tell.”
I glared at his nose, which was back to being right near my ear. “How so?”
He moved so we were eye-to-eye and gave me a look that said I was a moron. “You, like every other being, smell different when you lie.”
Duh. Couldn’t argue with a werewolf nose. “Fine. I hate what I’m going to say.” The words dragged out of my mouth. “Monty’s the most obvious choice. He knew where we were going, he controls Dead Corps, he’s been undead for centuries.”
“You have no proof,” Freddy said, sounding upset. I couldn’t blame him. I didn’t want to consider Monty an enemy. The mere idea hurt too much.