Once Upon A Broken Dream: A Creativia Anthology

by Richard M. Ankers

  “Danika!” yelled out a burley woman from the second-floor balcony, “quit your daydreaming and hurry it up.” Of course the supervisor would grump at her from across the room instead of approach her. That woman could never be bothered to clamber off her chair unless it made her look good and reliable. Danika missed the old supervisor, at least she helped out when they were swamped with people. Very much like her day was turning out to be.

  The final hour of her shift couldn't have come fast enough. Danika's feet burned as she sat on a bus seat next to the window. Why couldn't they sit when they obviously remained in the same spot all day long? She had read up on it and it turned out many cultures allowed sitting at the cash for retail employees. If only she could work at one of those places then she wouldn't have to rub her feet every night to stave off the pain. If only she could be anywhere but there.

  Music pumped through Danika's ear buds, downing out the city noise as she flicked up on her cellphone. Cruising though social media kept her claustrophobia at bay as well as kept her up to date with family and friends. She lived far away from them hoping for better job offers in the city. Boy was she ever wrong. She was so focused she hardly noticed when someone sat in the seat next to her. Driving wouldn't be as bad but it was too expensive. She had calculated that if she wanted a car she would have to give up her apartment. She would prefer the small, grungy living space she had to living out of a car.

  The rain outside pounded on the windows cleaning them of dust. It was appropriate for the day she had. First Danika misplaced her keys only to find them on the floor near their usual spot. A new bill wormed its way into her mail box demanding more money that she couldn't spend. What it was for she couldn't figure out. A stranger tried to nab her purse while she waited for the morning bus resulting in a pulled shoulder and her being late. Coworkers picked on her again as they normally did, but their words cut deeper than they usual during lunch. Her current predicament was she didn't have an umbrella with her for protection.

  It was always like that for her. Danika's life had turned into one mishap after another. School was great, she could stay by herself and study and was applauded for her work. Once that was over she had to go into society and she had no idea how to do that. Communication was never her strong suit and it was what she needed to survive. If only they taught her that at school instead of geography or algebra.

  The weight of what her life had become pulled on her heart drawing out tears. How did it come to all that despair? What had she done wrong for her to fall so far? Danika's grades were good once she discovered her niche and had everything completed on time no matter the workload. She never rebelled beyond snitching an extra dessert now and then. Her parents were highly praised for her upbringing from many who crossed their path. All that preparation, work, and dedication was for nothing. She was worthless in the true world.

  “Hey, uh… miss, are you ok?” The male voice intruded on her thoughts making her gasp. Danika hadn't realized that her playlist had ended. She looked over to her neighbor to find kindness in his calm blue eyes. There was nothing extraordinary about him. His brown hair was a bit of a mess as was his worn, grey hoodie with grease stained sleeves. His backpack had a zipper starting to fray and he held it on his lap. The one thing that stood out was a scar above his eyebrow.

  His cheeks dusted with pink. “You wouldn't be the first to stare at it.” Danika quickly turned away as her cheeks burned. How rude could she be? Not like she voluntarily talked to people that often, she preferred to keep to herself. “It's alright. I'm used to it now and it's been a great conversation piece.” From the corner of her eye she saw the smirk flash on his lips for an instant. “But back to my question, are you alright? You were crying so…”

  She balled her fists. Danika obviously disturbed the guy's commute to where ever he was going. A pressure built in her chest, one she had become familiar with. She took a deep breath in before letting it out slowly. “I'm fine. Sorry I bothered you.” He looked to the backpack in his hands. She returned to the window, thankful the conversation was over.

  The rain continued splattering on the window as the bus stopped to pick up more passengers. A crack of thunder made her jump and caused a child to cry. The mother tried to hush it but the child refused. Danika couldn't blame it. She didn't expect the storm to pick up as no weather reports stated so during her work shift. Not that they were right very often. She rubbed the palm of her hand while focusing on her breathing. She needed to calm down or else panic would set in. She feared another coming ever since the first trip to the hospital. She couldn't go there again.

  A tap came to her shoulder. She jumped before looking over to see the young man wanted to talk again. She wanted to ignore him but couldn't, he had noticed her looking at him. She painfully removed one of her earbuds and waited. He avoided her eyes and wringed his hands. “I've said that so much that I know when someone doesn't mean it. Life is hard I know but…” His head lowered and he didn't continue.

  Danika played with the fabric on her purse. That man, that stranger, was the first to say something was off. No one had picked up on the turmoil inside as she learned to keep it hidden. All her friends and family hadn't visited in months which was a blessing. She could hear her father giving her a lecture and feel her mother's disappointment though her silence. Her few friends would tell her that she was over thinking it and that others had it worse. She should be able to fix everything on her own according to them and she came to expect it.

  “If you want to talk about it we can get off at your stop and we can go to a coffee shop or something. Food helps me clear my head, gets foggy when you're hungry.” Her stomach growled at the thought of food but she couldn't afford to get anything. It was another reason why she was glad no one visited. She couldn't imagine the scolding she would get if any of them found out about her empty fridge.

  “I can't,” Danika whispered. Tears pricked her eyes. She couldn't start crying again, not there. Not when someone was watching.

  “It'll be my treat,” he offered. “My mom says every lady deserves to be treated once in a while. I think it's been long overdue for you.” More tears threatened to break the seal. Why now when she was so broken, so lost? Who was he to barge in on her life? “My name's Mike by the way.”

  “Why are you doing this? What do you want from me?” No one in that day and age was that kind without wanting something in return.

  His eyebrows shot up high. “I don't want anything.” Mike's eyes darted around to the other passengers. They paused when they met hers before widening. “I'm sorry I didn't want to upset you. I just…” Again, he dropped the subject and looked away.

  Danika couldn't figure him out. She pegged him to be outgoing but the way he stopped mid-sentence caused red flags to go up for her. Maybe she should get off the bus earlier to see if he follows. If so she could call the police and be done with it. Then again, the rain was coming down hard, it would make for a long walk home if she was wrong and she couldn't risk getting sick. She needed all the hours she could get.

  “I want to help you before you decide to take the same path I did.” Mike mumbled as he wrung his oil stained hands. He rubbed his scar and winced at the touch. “That's why I offered taking you out for food.” The way he talked she wondered if he had approached others before, like he was some sort of counselor. “I don't want to take advantage or harm you in anyway. I just want to talk.”

  Danika looked to her lap. A chance to talk to someone sounded nice, perhaps even needed. To talk to a complete stranger might not be the best idea but Mike suggested a public place. If anything were to go wrong she could seek help. She wiped the tears from her eyes. One change, she thought. One last try to make sense of everything that's gone wrong. If it doesn't help then she had only one option left. She hoped he had some insight she didn't.

  “The only thing is I'm not sure if there's any places to eat around my place.” She admitted, refusing to look at him. You would think for living there for over a
year she would know of something.

  “That's ok. I know this city like the back of my hand. Tell me the street and I'll think of something.”

  Mike's enthusiasm was contagious. A smile pulled at the corner of her lips, something she hadn't felt for a long time, at least not a genuine one. “I get off at the corner of Ferguson and Brown Street.”

  He let out a low whistle. “Not the nicest neighborhood you've chosen to live in but I do know of a place near there. Just don't expect some fancy cuisine.”

  Mike escorted Danika from the stop to a small cafe a few buildings away from her apartment complex. The door paint was faded and chipping away while one of the windows was boarded up due to broken glass. It was a normal sight for her block but knowing she was going inside caused her unease. Was she walking into a trap? She had to admit that going in there wasn't the smartest thing she'd ever agreed to.

  Inside wasn't much better. The few booths in the cramped space were tattered and needed a good cleaning. A light over one of tables was broken and a spot on the wallpaper was torn. A glass display highlighted sweet treats beautifully decorated along with delectable sandwiches and was the highlight of the store. At the counter was a teenager looking at his phone, grumbling about something.

  Mike approached the teen quietly and slammed his hands on the wooden counter. He gasped as he jumped from the stool he was sitting on. Eyes wide he stared at Mike before he snorted and returned to his phone. “Dad's out 'till later, come back then if he owes you something.”

  “You know that's no way to talk to customers Brad. Do I need to call Doug and tell him what kind of mess you've left?” The teen sat up, fully alert, shaking his head. “I didn't think so, besides I'm not here for the bill.” Mike motioned towards Danika. “I'm here to eat with a friend unless you've stopped serving.”

  “Sign says open and dad wouldn't pay me if I turned you away.” Brad stuck his phone in his pocket before pointing to the menu on the wall behind him. It was beautifully written in chalk with a few drawings scattered about. “Pick something and I'll get on it.”

  Danika looked over at the faded menu. Everything made her stomach growl and she knew that she couldn't pretend that what she'd been living off of was enough. What she couldn't give to have a true Thanksgiving dinner again with mashed potatoes, gravy, carrots and turkey. Her gaze dropped to the marked-up counter in front of her. She missed her family and wished she could visit them at least once but financial burdens prevented it. Memories of family gatherings filled her mind causing familiar pressure to build in her chest. She took a deep breath, she had to get her emotions under control. The cafe was no place to break down.

  Her thoughts turned to her present situation. It wasn't right taking money from a stranger no matter how hungry she was. Perhaps she could get away with a glass of water and not be a burden to Mike. She was an adult and as such should be able to care for herself, even if her situation was dire. “Water only please,” she mumbled.

  “You can pick whatever you want, it's ok.”

  Danika shook her head. “I don't know you Mike, it wouldn't be right.”

  He crossed his arms and stared at her. Brad leaned forward seemingly taking and interest in the discussion. “What wouldn't be right is sending you home when you're hungry. You can't deny a growling stomach, I heard it.” Mike reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. The touch was surprisingly comforting and was something she missed. Her father would do that when she had felt inadequate and it always calmed her fears. No other had that power, not until she met Mike. The memory made tears prick her eyes again. “Please pick something.” She wiped her eyes with her hands and nodded, taking the hint that she wasn't getting away with nothing. They picked out their meals and took a seat in a booth.

  Danika stirred the ice in her drink unsure of what to do. Mike had gone to wash up before eating, he had noticed his hands were still covered in grime from work. Her hands trembled as her mind wandered. How could a stranger know her thoughts? How come the only place she could afford to live was in a shady part of the city when she worked so hard? Why was she failing so miserable at adult life when school was so easy? Why did it all happen this way?

  She held her head in her hands while trying to hold back tears. Her whole body trembled. Her breath short and quick. Why, oh why did she leave home? Why did she think she could do it on her own?

  A strong hand squeezed her shoulder. Danika froze. Her father wasn't there, her parents were always busy with work or something. She had to control herself and remember she was in public. That was not the place to lose her emotions, she had to keep calm.

  “Hey,” Mike whispered gently kneeling beside her," it'll be ok, tell me what's bugging you. We'll figure it out." How she wished she had someone close to her as kind as him. How she wished someone could understand the pain coming from within. There was never such a person, not one.

  She shook her head. “No one can help. I'm an adult. I can do this on my own, I have to.”

  “Well that's a load of bull.” Mike sat across from her and pulled his sandwich closer. He took a bite and swallowed. “No one has done anything significant on their own. History shows things turn out better when we work together.”

  “Experience tells me a different story,” she mumbled. How many group projects nearly failed due to people not chipping in? All the work she had to do on her own to make it pass while other people reap the benefits. How many relationships had she witnessed fail because people can't be faithful? How many of her own relationships broke apart because the other moved on? Everyone in the city and back in her hometown lived for themselves, not a one helped the other unless there was some benefit to them.

  Mike sighed before taking another bite of his meal. He stared off at the old wallpaper while he devoured the sandwich. Danika took a bite of her own and was pleasantly surprised at the taste. She expected a poorly made sandwich but Brad obviously knew how to throw together a good ham and cheese.

  The rain hammered away at the dirty window as the lights flickered inside. People in the apartments above stomped quickly to the other end of the building disturbing the dust on the ceiling. The dust floated down like sad, little snowflakes and she watched it with thoughts weighing heavily on her heart. Her existence was a joke much like the particles that floated around her. There was no meaning to her life.

  Mike finished eating by washing it all down with a glass of water. “Well now that I've got food in me I feel much better. How 'bout you?” Danika nodded, the nourishment did make her stomach more at ease but not her mind. He stretched before lacing his fingers behind his head and closed his eyes. A smile pulled at the scar on his eyebrow as he let out a deep breath.

  “You feel up to talking now or did I push too hard?”

  “I don't think you can help Mike, no matter how much I tell you, I'm sorry.” Danika wrung her hands. She couldn't tell anyone what she wanted to do no matter how much they prodded. The entire idea was frowned upon but she needed to find a way out. Her body shook with each breath. She couldn't keep living how she was, it was killing her.

  “Maybe not but I'd like to try.”

  Danika shook her head. “I'm not dragging anyone else into this.” She stood, wanting to quit the conversation. She wanted to leave but a part of her wanted to stay. Maybe he could help but no, she couldn't let him in. She'd just hurt him when she decided to disappear. She had disappointed enough people in her life, she couldn't allow one more to fall prey to it.

  Mike dug through his bag and took out a pen and paper. He quickly scribbled on it and handed it to her. “It's my cell number. If you ever want to chat about anything give me a call.” Danika looked at the numbers before tears broke loose. He reached out and wiped one away with his thumb. The touch was so feather light she could have sworn it never happened. “Everything will be ok, trust me.”

  Danika turned and walked out of the cafe without saying a word. Once she closed the door, she ran as fast as she could through the rain. The large drople
ts jabbed her as they fell. She deserved each one for leaving a good man the way she did but he'd find someone better. Anyone else was better than her. Each prick of pain she earned for not living up to her potential.

  She rushed through the security door of her building and flew up the stairs nearly knocking someone over on the way. She forced her key in the lock and yanked the door open. She went in and slammed it shut before sliding to the floor, leaving a streak of water. She couldn't hold it in anymore, all the emotion from meeting Mike and everything else that day burst out in loud, wailing tears as her body shook. A neighbor pounded on the wall calling out for her to hush but she couldn't, the pain was too great.

  When the sobs eased Danika stood, leaning on the wall for support. It was time. She took lined paper and a pen from her dresser drawer and sat at the small table in her apartment. She stared at the blank papers knowing what she had to do but couldn't find the words to write.

  Her phone buzzed from within her purse. She pulled it out and the message she saw broke her heart. Her mother was asking about her day as she always did before bed. She must have thought of her as a disappointment, there was no other explanation as to why she couldn't find another job. What kind of daughter moves away from home and never visits? Her brother always found time and money to go back and Danika's parents talked about him so fondly. They had their perfect child, they didn't need her.

  Danika sent back her usual response of everything was fine and work was normal. If she mentioned she was treated for supper by a stranger her mother would call. She didn't want to talk to anyone after she had been crying. Her mother would worry and she couldn't have that happen. Her parents had enough on their plate.

  Once her mother said her goodnight, she returned to the paper. Danika had to let them know it wasn't their fault, it was all hers. She was the useless one. She should have known better. It would not be right to leave them with questions. She picked up the pen and started on the task before her.