“You work for his company how?”
Josh immediately recognized her protective tone and he sat up to defend himself.
“I’m doing art for his resorts now,” he explained. “His designer saw my art and she pulled me into a meeting and now I’m contracted to produce—”
“What’s this man’s name, Joshua?” She was blunt and Josh’s eyes widened in panic.
“Margaret, you know I can’t—”
“If this is who I think it is, I will personally—”
“Margaret, no! I can’t tell you anything. You know that!” Josh’s emotions took a back seat as he tried to talk her down. “It’s all confidential, and besides, telling you won’t make it hurt any less.”
“It will when I beat his arse from here to England,” she snapped, her own emotions written all over her face. Josh frowned, briefly wondering if they were, in fact, talking about the same person and how in the hell he’d even allowed himself to talk about this.
He scrubbed a hand over his face, sighing. “It’s probably just me. I’m the idiot. I fell for the guy and he didn’t have the balls to actually end the arrangement. He just…ditched out. Which would normally be fine, he doesn’t owe me anything… I just thought—”
“If he doesn’t respect you enough to end it properly then he’s a coward and he most certainly doesn’t have any balls worth talking about.”
Josh tried to laugh but it was lacking, and he dropped his head back into his hands as more tears slipped out on their own accord. “I can’t believe I fell in love with a fucking client.” He sighed heavily. Margaret rubbed his back once more.
“Happens to the best of us, honey. It’ll be all right. I promise. And when I find him, I’ll give him a piece of my mind.”
“Please don’t.” He sniffled, not bothering to look up.
“Don’t worry about it, Josh.”
Somehow, he knew that if she ever did find Jamie, she’d rip him to pieces. Josh hoped he’d be there to see it.
* * * *
The Miami sun beat down on the open balcony of James’ penthouse suite. Three models—one female and two male—lounged in the pool with drinks in hand while James answered a few work emails from under an umbrella at a pool-side table. They’d been there since the night before, when he’d met them down on Ocean Drive at Nikki Beach. He should be thrilled, having them all at once like some kind of rock star.
He wasn’t.
Filling the hole Josh had left in his life and heart was proving impossible. He’d been at this for two weeks now, burying himself in work and other people, trying to erase the void. The text from Josh still sat in his messages, read the moment he’d received it. But by then he’d already decided he had to stop. He had to step away. He didn’t want to, though—absolutely not. He wanted to pull Josh in and never let go—but he couldn’t. Josh was so young and had his whole life ahead of him. And James was on the verge of settling down. Josh had made him crave that more than anything.
Watching the three people make out in his pool, drunk on his liquor, hardly made his dick swell. It was inevitable that he’d end up back in bed with them again, but for the time being, he was thinking about Josh and wishing things were different.
The strange thing about all this was that Josh was now employed by the company, working directly for Maria. So while James knew he could get away with avoiding him for a while, seeing him was also inevitable. And seeing him again…? He knew exactly what it would do to him. Just the idea of laying eyes on him again, of being in the same room as Josh and hearing his deep voice and meeting those blue eyes? It made his heart skip a beat and his stomach lurch, all at once.
He missed Josh so damn much that it made his skin crawl, like a perpetual itch just under the surface that nothing could scratch. The sex with his current companions was filthy and fun, but it was every bit as empty as James’ heart. It didn’t matter how attractive they were or how good they were in bed. Nothing could compare to Josh and to the memories that James clung to from their time together—every kiss, every touch, spending every night in each other’s arms and waking up together like it was somehow the most natural thing in the world…
The sound of a newly arrived email stole Jamie’s attention, and he only then realized he’d been staring off aimlessly as his mind had drifted. He sighed and gave a slight shake of his head to focus, then clicked on the message from Maria and began to read.
“This is a company-wide reminder. The opening of Josh Roberts’ exhibition is set for December sixteenth at the Whitney Museum of American Art. Business attire requested. The exhibition opens at seven p.m. Light hors d’oeuvres to be served with champagne, wine and beer. Please RSVP by the seventh. This is our first event of this nature, and we’d really love to see you all there in support of our very first in-house artist.”
There were a few more details, and a picture of Josh and one of his pieces at the bottom. It had to be recent, James realized, as his heart simply ceased function in his chest, giving up the erratic beating of moments before. Josh’s hair was a little longer, a little less gelled and controlled—fluffier by James’ standards. And he’d grown a beard in the last two weeks. It covered his jaw perfectly, as if he’d been meant to grow one all along. It was a dark blond, an addictive shade. He looked tired. Jamie’s throat was suddenly dry.
He hadn’t even remembered receiving the first email. Had he? He started to search when a splash of water was sent in his direction, wetting his toes. His gaze flashed up behind his sunglasses, but the young brunette woman didn’t seem to notice the daggers he shot through the lenses. “Are you ever going to stop working?” she whined, her young voice high pitched. “We’ve been waiting hours for a repeat of last night.” She batted her lashes at him as he glanced back at the email still on the screen—the young man who owned his heart staring back at him with broken blue eyes. James slammed the laptop shut.
“Don’t splash me again and I’ll take you inside and fuck you until you can’t walk.” He stood up and headed for the sliding glass door as the models excitedly followed in their little herd. It wasn’t like he would go to the opening, anyway. How could he show his face when he hadn’t even dignified Josh with a platonic response or goodbye?
* * * *
The office was quiet as James followed the hallway to his office in downtown Miami. Most of the staff had already left for the holiday and anyone who hadn’t was prepping to go to New York for the exhibition opening. James had seen the forum, heard the guest count and was aware of how excited Maria was for the particular event. Stephanie had assisted from afar in event coordination, and James was surprised to see her coming toward him from the direction of his office that afternoon.
“I figured you’d left already.” He laughed a little, though it sounded hollow and harsh. Stephanie eyed him but kept her professional demeanor.
“Catching a flight this afternoon. Are you doing okay?” She let her eyes slip up and down, concern filling them. “You’re coming, right?”
“I’m fine.” He ignored her second question. “Just tired. Long weekend.”
“It’s Wednesday…” She raised an eyebrow, sighing. “Are we ever going to talk about it?”
“Don’t you have a flight to catch?” He brushed past her, but she wasn’t bothered. She turned on her heel and followed him. James sighed, pushing the glass door open and propping it open with the door stop as she followed him inside.
“I have three hours, so if you want to talk about the elephant in the room or the crack in your heart, I’m here to listen.” She took a seat in one of the plush chairs on one side of his desk when he sat down at his computer on the other side. The office was clean, modern, and sunlight poured in through the windows. It was almost too sunny for his dark mood.
He sighed heavily, rubbing his face with both hands. “I don’t wanna talk about it, Steph.”
“Have you talked to him? You won’t tell me what happened and that scares me, because it’s not like you to not t
alk to me about things.” James looked up at her and he understood that she only meant well. “Look at you. You’re a mess. I’ve never seen you look like this and I’m genuinely worried. What did he do? Do we need to fire him? I’ll talk to Maria. I’ll—”
“You’ll do nothing of the sort.” He squashed her mini rant, shaking his head. “Josh did nothing. He’s perfect. This is all my fault, and there’s nothing we can do now to fix it, okay? So let’s just let it go. And no, I’m not going.”
“Jamie—”
“Stephanie,” he warned her, “go to New York. I’ll see you the week after New Year’s. Do not come back any time before then. We’re due in New Zealand February first to oversee the beginning of construction on the Whitianga resort and I’ll need you fresh and ready. Your bonus is in the mail and your Christmas present will arrive to your mother’s on the twenty-third. Do not open it until Christmas, understand?”
For all his personal drama, James never failed to take care of his people. Stephanie’s gratitude and appreciation shone in her wide-eyed surprise. “Jamie, I—”
“Get out of here.” He pointed toward the door and tried to contain his smile. “Behave yourself with Alejandro. I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him.”
Stephanie stood and scooted toward the door. She did blush at his words though. “Listen… He’s a gentleman,” she defended, but James made a loud pfft sound that made her laugh. “You’re a jerk.”
“Hey, I’m just looking out for my best girl, all right? You can’t blame me for that. You call me if he does anything awful and I will personally see to it we never hear from him again. Got it?”
“Are you…telling me what I think you are?” Her eyes widened but he acted casual, fighting a grin.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Now get,” he urged, letting a smile loose as she wished him a Merry Christmas and saw herself out of the office. As soon as she was gone, James reclined in the chair, the email from a few days ago still staring at him from his inbox. The picture of Josh still haunted him. To go to New York was foolish—possibly even unprofessional. Josh didn’t want to see him. Why would he?
Pursing his lips, he closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
If he didn’t go to New York, he’d be letting his own pride get in the way of supporting someone he actually loved. It was also a big deal for his company. The company he owned. As much as this was the last thing he personally wanted to do, maybe it was the right thing to do. He didn’t move, however. He continued to stare at the computer like it would make his decision for him—until he finally picked up his phone and called his sister. Maybe it was time for a confession and to ask for advice.
“Jamie-o! Calling me on a Wednesday afternoon?!” His sister’s shocked voice filled the office as he stared down at A1A through the large office windows. “To what do I owe this surprise?”
“Hey, Bec,” he began, heaving another sigh. “I gotta tell you something, but you have to promise not to tell Ma.”
“What’d you do?”
“I hope you have a few minutes. It’s a long story.”
* * * *
Josh couldn’t believe the turnout on his behalf. The third floor of the Whitney Museum of American Art was filled with people—and they were all there to see his work. It was humbling and a dream come true.
His pieces adorned the walls. He’d poured his anxious energy into creation. Pieces were ready to be shipped off to their new homes and the originals displayed here for all J. B. Barnwell LLC employees to see. He’d been given ten tickets for guests and was a little embarrassed that he’d only invited four people then given the rest to his mom to invite her friends. His mother, Nadia, Andrew and Margaret had all accepted their invitations and promised to make appearances. He’d arrived early in the navy-blue suit Maria had insisted on, fussing with his tie every few minutes. He was beyond nervous. But one thing put him at ease.
The fact Stephanie had assured him that James wasn’t coming.
It was a huge weight off his shoulders, knowing James wouldn’t be there. His mother was still under the impression that he and James were still together, and he didn’t have the heart to tell her they weren’t. He’d gone to her home for Thanksgiving the week he’d gotten back from Italy, and all she’d done was carry on about how excited she was that Josh had a serious man in his life. That had been back when he had been still waiting to hear from Jamie. Now he’d long since given up.
And it hurt. It killed his heart. But there wasn’t anything he could do about it. And he loved this new job so much he wasn’t about to risk it by attempting to contact the CEO of the company. He’d been the guy’s escort, nothing more. And while it was a slap to the face every time he thought about it, it was his own fault that he’d fallen in love. There was no one to blame but himself.
“You look awful pensive for someone who’s about to have the biggest night of his young life yet.”
Josh looked up from where he’d been absently staring at the program to find Nadia and Andrew waltzing toward him, arm in arm as friends. The smile that grew on his face was natural.
“Just counting my blessings is all,” he replied, stepping forward to meet them as they crossed the immaculate space. He embraced Nadia first, tightly. After his conversation with Margaret that night, he’d come home exhausted, an emotional wreck, and had unloaded to Nadia and apologized. She’d been prickly at first, but upon learning of his plight, she’d been much softer to him. And he was much less aggressive now that he’d talked a bit about his situation and sorted out his next personal moves.
“You do have a lot to be thankful for.” Andrew chuckled as they embraced as well. “The Whitney? Man, this is a whole other level. You’re gonna ditch us soon, huh?”
Josh smiled wide and shook his head, his hand on Andrew’s shoulder. “I could be making a million and I’m still staying in our apartment,” he confirmed. They all laughed.
“You’re a damn fool,” Andrew teased as a waiter carried over a tray of champagne. They each accepted one as Maria approached, politely stealing Josh to introduce him to some higher-ups from the company. Josh excused himself and let the night carry him wherever it was destined to take him. He was determined to embrace every moment of the evening. He’d spent his whole life dreaming of this moment. He was going to live in it wholly.
As the evening wore on, more people came. Josh’s mother arrived with a few of her neighborhood friends, excited to show off her son’s new endeavor. She gushed over him, raving about how proud she was to her friends as she embraced him. Josh blushed wildly—making his mother proud was one of the best feelings in the world. He’d been working a job for years that he couldn’t tell her about and now he finally had something he could share with her. It was special in ways he couldn’t put into words.
Stephanie and Alejandro showed up next. Stephanie launched herself at him as though they were they oldest of friends, embracing him tightly. He laughed and held her. He’d missed her company over these last few weeks. She was a ray of sunshine. It was evident why James kept her as his assistant.
“I’ve missed you!” she exclaimed, leaning back to cup his cheeks. “Look at this beard! You handsome stud.” She ran her hands over the bristles on his jaw, grinning widely. He flushed.
“Thanks, Steph. Trying something new, I guess.” He shrugged, unable to admit he was doing his best to get past James and the heartache. She seemed to read it in his eyes, her expression turning to one of comfort.
“I know you got my emails and I know you know he’s not coming, but he’s a mess without you, I swear.” It felt out of place for her to share such personal information, but Josh’s heart clenched and wrapped up her words in some semblance of satisfaction and self-preservation.
“Well…that’s his own doing, I guess,” Josh replied curtly, swallowing the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat. Stephanie squeezed his arm. “At least he’s not coming.” He forced a smile, albeit a pained one.
“What happened between you two? I know it’s none of my business but—” Her words were cut off by a wave of hushed reactions coming from the crowd around them. They both turned their heads toward the entrance to the exhibit and Josh’s breath caught.
No. No.
Maria was greeting James warmly, shaking his hand and welcoming him into the exhibit. J. B. Barnwell employees talked among themselves as their CEO made his presence known, waving at some he recognized and introducing himself to those he didn’t. Josh wanted to look for Nadia and Andrew, wanted to find a way to ground himself but he couldn’t tear his eyes away. Every bit of ease and comfort he’d had about the night flew out of the window.
“You said—”
“I know!” Stephanie rushed out. “I just talked to him before I left Miami, and he said he wasn’t coming. I swear! I would have told you if he was!”
Josh knew she would have. He trusted her. And the fact that James hadn’t told her was surprising. It didn’t help settle Josh’s nerves one bit as they now raged within him.
Oh shit. My mother.
Glancing around, he found that she’d already spotted James and was looking between him and Josh with a sweet, almost-excited expression. She would expect a big introduction, and she would expect him and James to act like they were still together. He had no idea how to get out of this. Panic and anxiety began to flood his system. He had to get to James before she did.
The Billionaire and the Escort Page 20