Blind Love

by Kishan Paul

  “Did you bring your hammer?” Sunny asked when they entered the kitchen. “There are some things in here in need of pounding,” she said, jutting her chin at Lauren.

  Sunny smirked and winked at him. Before he could think of a smartass response, the cup in Lauren’s hand fell and crashed to the kitchen floor. Apparently, Gabe wasn’t the only one who liked to make his lovely neighbor turn all shades of red.

  Lauren turned her back to them and squatted on the tiled floor. She muttered words he couldn’t quite make out while she cleaned the mess. Beside her, the dog paced and whimpered.

  “Good morning,” he said, too busy appreciating the view to offer help.

  “Why, Mr. Neighbor man with the power tools, are you staring at my boss’s ass?”

  Before Gabe could respond, Lauren chimed in. “Gabe, do you know how to change the locks on my door?”

  “I do. Why?” he asked and continued to admire her assets.

  “I need to fire my personal assistant and make sure she doesn’t slither back in here after I toss her ass to the curb.”

  “Sweetheart, your checks barely fuel my car and caffeine addiction. Even if you fired me or changed the locks, I’d still show up. I get my best writing done here.”

  “Oww!” Lauren yelped and shook her hand. The German shepherd howled in response to her distress.

  When the four-legged bodyguard tried to go to Lauren, Sunny grabbed his harness. “Oh no you don’t,” she grunted and pulled him back.

  “Here, let me help.” Gabe grabbed the trash can and crouched next to her. By the time he’d reached for her hand, Lauren had already pulled out the half-inch piece of shard from her finger and picked up more jagged sections of the cup from off the floor.

  “I don’t need help, I’ve… Oww!” she yelped, holding her palm for the second time. Her dog yowled.

  He chuckled. “I’m sure you don’t, but your dog’s killing my eardrums. Do you really need to do this one alone?” Before she could argue, Gabe pulled out the second fragment and tossed it into the trash. She sat on her haunches, as if considering her options.

  “If you two will excuse us, I’m going to work on my real job and get Jack out of here before he has a panic attack. Have fun,” Sunny said over her shoulder as she and beast sauntered out of the room.

  Hand positioned over the garbage bag, Gabe processed the interesting morsel of information. “Did you call the dog Jack?”

  “Jack Sparrow. Lauren has a thing for Johnny Depp,” she hollered from the hallway.

  What are the chances she has a dog and a man with the same name?

  Gabe smiled at his lying neighbor with the adorably flushed face.

  This changes everything.

  Before she had a chance to argue, he cupped her elbow and pulled her to her feet. Gabe’s large hands circled her waist and lifted her off the ground.

  Lauren gasped and grabbed his shoulders. “What are you doing?”

  “Getting you out of this mess,” he said to her breasts, which were currently inches from his nose…mouth…hands. Enjoying the experience, he moved as slowly as humanly possible.

  He slid her onto the kitchen island and seized her injured hand. After inspecting her cuts, he pressed a paper towel onto the wounds. “Here, keep pressure on them.”

  “So you flip houses and administer first aid,” she said in a nervous, high-pitched tone.

  He chuckled at her pitiful attempt to avoid the subject of lying to him. “What can I say? I’m good with my hands.”

  “You and Sunny seem to have the same sense of humor.” She laughed. The sound immediately turned his brain to mush.

  He moved back to put some distance between them. “Where do you keep your broom?”

  “Here, you don’t need to…” When Lauren tried to slide off the countertop, he grabbed her by the hips and anchored her in place.

  Her face was in the perfect location, inches away from his. Her breath smelled of mint and his mouth watered at the thought of tasting it. “The way I see it, you have two options. Sweep the mess up yourself and then let me patch up all the cuts you’ll get on your feet and hands, or stay on the island and let me clean up.” He took in another lungful of her scent. “Either way, I’m going to have to help.”

  She chewed her lip. Unable to resist, Gabe tugged at her chin, pulling the soft skin out from under her teeth. “Consider it payment for the coffee.”

  She leaned back, widening the distance between them, and pointed toward the refrigerator. “It’s in the pantry. The door to the left of the fridge.”

  “Good choice.”

  When he opened the door to the walk-in closet, Gabe’s mouth opened. “This is amazing.”

  Baskets lined the shelves, each container was a different color and labeled in raised lettering, an organizer’s dream come true. “Who helped you do this?”

  “Sunny.”

  He found the broom and dustpan hanging on the wall and started the task of sweeping away the broken remnants.

  “I’m a bit of a neat freak,” she confessed with a nervous smile.

  For a moment, he stopped and stared at her.

  Her mouth formed a circle as she sucked in some air. Both his chest and crotch tightened, watching her breasts rise in the process. It had been a long time since he’d lusted for a woman as much as he currently hungered for her. He needed to figure out how to get her to lower the Great Wall she had built up.

  “So, about dinner tonight,” Lauren said.

  “Where would you like to go?” he asked nonchalantly while pouring the debris into the can.

  “We’re not.”

  “Oh? Jack said no?”

  Her cheeks turned his favorite color again and she giggled. “For the record, Jack is the best boyfriend I’ve ever had.”

  Gabe returned the broom to its home in the closet. He planted his elbows on the counter next to her and nudged her with his shoulder. “Obviously you haven’t been picking the right men.”

  Her face sobered. A flicker of sadness shot through her eyes. “I’m not interested in men.”

  Bingo.

  “You prefer women? ’Cause if you do, I don’t mind watching.”

  “I bet you wouldn’t.” She laughed and slid off the island, walking to the other side of the kitchen. “No women, only dogs. They’re loyal. They listen. They don’t tell me what to do, how to live.”

  The tip of Lauren’s finger grazed the drawers as she proceeded down the length of the room. Gabe didn’t follow her. Instead, he admired her movements. Just like when she went to the jogging trail, it looked casual, natural. But it wasn’t. She stopped directly in front of the coffeemaker. She was counting, but what? The drawers?

  “I like my uncomplicated life.” She poured two cups.

  “You can have fun while living an uncomplicated life.”

  She shrugged, handing him a mug. He wrapped his fingers around her palm.

  Her cheeks heated. Lauren pulled her fingers away and leaned against the cabinets across from him. “The sugar and cream are on the counter if you need them.” She took a sip of her drink before continuing. “And you’ve already complicated things.”

  “How?”

  She pointed her cup at him. “You’re pushy.”

  He smirked at her description. The life he’d led. The things he’d seen. The poor thing had no clue how pushy he could be. “So why didn’t you tell me the truth yesterday?”

  Her smile turned into a full-fledged laugh. God forgive him for the sinful things he wanted to do to her mouth.

  “What, that I prefer the company of my dog to you?”

  Leaving the untouched coffee behind, he walked over, placed his hand over hers and leaned in close. There was more than one way to get through her fortress. “There are things a dog can’t do but I can.”

  Lauren�
��s eyes widened. She lifted her cup of coffee between them. “Speaking of lying, I thought you were leaving today.”

  “No, I said I had renters coming to sign the lease agreement today. They won’t move in until the end of August. Which leaves us three whole months to investigate and challenge your theories about men and uncomplicated lives,” he whispered, taking the drink out of her hands. Placing it on the counter, he moved in closer. The mouthwatering scent of citrus from her hair hit his senses, drawing him in.

  He watched her. From the way her chest rose, her cheeks colored and those lips parted, it was obvious she was attracted to him. He didn’t understand why she held back. “We’re not all that different, you know,” he whispered. “I like things uncomplicated too.”

  Her face turned toward his as he spoke.

  “No one guilting me into spending time with them, telling me what to wear, when to eat,” he continued.

  She cleared her throat and twisted her hand away from his. “We’re in agreement and you understand why I can’t go out to dinner with you.” Her voice came out husky.

  He smiled. Dinner was the farthest thing from his mind at the moment. He pulled her loose hair off her shoulder and played with a strand. “Of course I do, and I promise I won’t ask again.”

  Lauren’s eyes closed. She fiddled with the rim of her cup.

  “How about we let things happen. Enjoy each other’s company. No rules. No expectations.”

  She shook her head. “I’m not spontaneous. I can’t let things happen.”

  “I have a funny feeling you might change your mind. You know where I live. Let me know when you’re ready,” he said, seconds before walking out her back door.

  Chapter Four

  Bottled-up Feelings

  Lauren poured her third serving of coffee and clenched the mug. The heat of the cup against her skin didn’t compare to the burn of humiliation rising from her stomach to her face. She tried to focus on her breathing to keep from dissolving into tears. What the hell just happened? For some reason, when she was around Gabe, her brain kept shutting down, making it impossible to put two coherent words together.

  She took a sip of the scalding brew and savored its warmth as it flowed down her throat. Memories of the last time she felt this powerless popped into her thoughts and with it, the all-too-familiar ache in her chest. She slammed the cup on the counter and balled her fists.

  No one will ever do that to me again.

  A door opened and the pitter patter of tiny paws and the clicking of heels against the hardwood stairs interrupted her thoughts.

  “Did I hear the door? What happened to Mr. Hottie?” Sunny asked.

  “He’s gone,” Lauren said.

  Jack whimpered and rubbed against her legs. He always seemed to know when she wasn’t doing well. Lauren scratched his head.

  Sunny squeezed her shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

  Lauren closed her eyes and tried to stay in control. “Him. You.” She stepped away from Sunny, walked to the living room and sat on the couch. “I told you I didn’t want him in the house. You invited him anyway. I told you I didn’t feel good about this. Instead of respecting what I said, you left me alone with him.”

  The sofa dipped when Sunny sat beside her. “I did,” she whispered, tucking a tissue in Lauren’s hand.

  She wiped the stray tears away before continuing. “I’ve never judged you for how you handle men or your life. And I’ve always made it clear I’m different.”

  “You have.”

  Lauren ignored the resignation in her friend’s voice and continued. “Do you know how humiliating this was? You let him believe I was interested. He left here thinking I’d come knocking at his door for sex.”

  “Cat, if he did, it’s because it’s obvious you’re attracted to him. What’s the harm in seeing what happens?”

  The Kleenex ripped in her hand as she twisted it. “The harm is you pushed something I’m not ready for.”

  “Come on, you’ve slammed the door on every single man who’s so much as said hello. How do you know you’re not ready?”

  Lauren spoke as calmly as she could. “I get to decide when I’m ready. When I’m attracted to someone and how I want to deal with it. Not you. Not my parents. Not the neighbor.” Her face warmed with emotion. She needed to get away before things she didn’t mean were said and done. She got up and walked to the stairs. “I’m not a child, Sunny. I didn’t work this hard to get this far so you could take over.”

  Shoes thudded against the floor as Sunny followed her to the stairs. “Yes, I pushed you. But I’m nothing like your parents. I’ve never pressed you like this before. Give me some credit here.” She moved in front of Lauren and stopped her from climbing the steps. “But that’s not the real problem. The real problem is you’re locking yourself away and hiding from the world.”

  Lauren ignored the second part of Sunny’s rant and focused on the first. Although annoyingly inappropriate, Sunny had never pushed a man on Lauren.

  “Good point, so what changed?”

  “It’s obvious you like him and he likes you. And he’s really really cute,” she stammered.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.” Waving her away, Lauren climbed the stairs. “So my boundaries and self-respect go out the window because he’s cute?”

  Sunny let out a groan and mumbled profanities under her breath. “Okay, wait. There’s more.”

  “I don’t want to hear anymore. I can’t think clearly right now.”

  “Ben’s back,” Sunny blurted out.

  Lauren froze, her chest tightened. The gnawing ache she’d shoved down earlier in the kitchen started up again. “What do you mean…” her throat constricted when she attempted to say his name, “…he’s back?”

  “He works for the Denver PD.”

  Stunned, Lauren processed the implications of the news. The hurt she’d bottled up in the pit of her stomach erupted, spreading through her. Unshed tears burned her eyes.

  No.

  No more pain. Not because of him.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I ran into him driving around your neighborhood on my way home Tuesday. I was off yesterday and it wasn’t something I wanted to share over the phone so I figured it could wait until I got back today.”

  “What difference does it make if he is here?” Lauren said, trying to sound nonchalant and failing pitifully. She gripped the bannister for support. Jack rested his head against the back of her legs. “He’s a cop, Sunny. He patrols neighborhoods. It’s his job. He’s married and has a daughter. You don’t need to worry about him stalking or coming after me.”

  Heels clicked against the steps. Sunny grabbed Lauren’s hand and squeezed. “He told me he divorced Hailey. And no, I’m not worried about him stalking you. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a piece of shit for what he did to you, but he’s not crazy. My gut says he’s working up the courage to talk to you and try to get back together.”

  The spot between Lauren’s eyebrows started to throb. She pulled her hand away and continued her escape to the bedroom. “So you thought if I slept with the neighbor, maybe knowing Ben’s here wouldn’t hurt me as much?”

  “I thought it might keep him away from you.”

  Sinking into her bed, she absently rubbed behind Jack’s ears. “You didn’t believe I was capable of keeping my distance without getting laid?”

  Sunny sunk in beside her. She rested her cheek on Lauren’s shoulder. “Cat, he hurt you and I was trying to…”

  “Keep him from hurting me again. I understand and thank you. But if Ben has as much power over me as you say, do you think my sleeping with the neighbor would have changed anything?”

  “I wanted him to see you’d moved on. That you’re better off without him.”

  “You don’t really think I am though, do you?” Lauren already knew t
he answer. She hadn’t been the same since Ben. A part of her stopped living five years ago.

  “In some ways you are, but you’ve lost your spark. You’re more serious.”

  The pain between her eyes radiated to the back of her head. “When your husband has an affair and chooses his mistress over you…” Lauren’s voice cracked. It was getting harder to keep the tears at bay. “I’m going to take a walk. I need some time to process all this before work.”

  “Okay.” Sticky glossed lips pressed against her cheek. “Cat, I love you.”

  She smiled. “I love you too.”

  Sunny’s feet shuffled against the carpet.

  “And Sunny…”

  The footsteps stopped.

  “I’m not mad at you. I’m just…”

  “I know,” Sunny said before she left the room.

  As soon as the door shut, the dam broke. Jack climbed up next to Lauren. His whiskers brushed against her arm. She pulled him close and rested her cheek on his neck. The warmth of him, his steady heartbeat, it all soothed her. Her tears slid down his fur, like they did all those years ago when Ben chose Hailey over her.

  Lauren wiped the tears away. With a deep breath, she and Jack made their way downstairs and out the door. Being outside always cleared her mind. The swirls of reds and blues she saw brightened in the sunlight. The sounds of nature, people, cars, all of it calmed her.

  During their senior year, she and Ben had been inseparable. A few months after graduation, they eloped. Her parents were furious. They wanted her to slow down. To figure out who she was. But Lauren thought she knew better. She and her husband were supposed to show them how wrong they were and, for five years, they did.

  Jack barked excitedly and sat on the sidewalk, pulling her out of her thoughts. When he started yodeling, she rubbed his neck to calm him down. The last time he did this, they waited a good ten minutes for a turtle to cross the sidewalk before he shut up and let them move on.

  “What is it, boy?”

  A vehicle drove past. The squirrel, or whatever distracted Jack, must have disappeared with the car because he stopped barking and started moving again. She followed while continuing her trek down memory lane.