by Mark Horn
Today is a reminder and a celebration. The work of preparing the garden calls for the commitment of Netzach. You have demonstrated this commitment by doing the work to reach this point in the count. Mazel tov!*30
Questions for reflection and contemplation: Day 27
1. (Wands) What are the fears that fuel your defenses in Relationship? How have they affected your ability to Commit to Relationship?
2. (Cups) Think of the times in your life when you appeared welcoming to someone but you were really closed off. Why was that? Think of any occasions when someone wanted to Connect with you and you deflected by showing off something about yourself. Why was that? Have you ever been on the other side of this experience? What was that like? What do you think was going on for the other person?
3. (Swords) Remember a time when your fear overwhelmed your faith. Looking back, see if you can feel where in that experience your Connection to the Divine was still present and available. Think back to a time when you feel that you betrayed your faith. What happened to your feeling of Divine Connection? Looking back, see if you can feel where in that experience your Connection to the Divine was still present and available.
4. (Pentacles) What are you doing to build, grow, and prepare your garden? Who is allowed in?
Day 28: Malchut of Netzach
Nobility in Endurance
Today is the twenty-eighth day of the Omer, which is four weeks of the Omer.
I was only five years old at the time, but I remember the image in the newspaper, and it’s a photograph you probably know: it’s a picture of Elizabeth Eckford, fifteen years old, entering Little Rock High School on September 25, 1957, escorted by members of the 101st Airborne Division of the U.S. Army through a crowd of white people screaming vitriol and hate. In the photo, the young black woman holds her body erect, her head held high and her gaze looking only forward as she makes her way through the menacing crowd. She had made that same journey three weeks earlier, but she and eight other black students—the Little Rock Nine—had been barred at the door to the school by the Arkansas National Guard. And after that first day getting in to school, she continued to attend classes. Enduring ongoing harassment, she and the other black students were pelted with vegetables, spat on, and insulted on a daily basis for a year.
For me, this image illustrates the energy we must find within us on this day: Nobility in Endurance. We may never find ourselves in such an extreme situation as Elizabeth Eckford’s. We may never be tested as the Little Rock Nine were. But should such a time come, may our love, our discipline, our hearts, our intention, our humility, and our connectedness all unite to give us the Nobility to Endure the inevitable setbacks until the day that we prevail.
Day 28: Malchut of Netzach in Atzilut
The Ten and Seven of Wands
_________within_________
And Moses asked YHVH, “Why do you treat Your servant so badly? Why haven’t I found favor in your eyes, since you put the burden of all the people on me? Did I give birth to them, so that you command me: ‘Carry them in your arms, like a nurse carrying a baby’ to the land You promised to their ancestors?”
NUMBERS 11:11–12
It wasn’t only the Israelites who complained in the desert. From the start, Moses didn’t even want to take on the burden of leading the people, asking YHVH to “send someone else.”14 Like Jonah, he wanted to run away. He actually got YHVH to agree to send Aaron to speak with Pharaoh instead of him. And in their wanderings, when the people complained to him, he would complain to YHVH. Yet when it comes to Nobility and Leadership qualities, Moses is at the top of every Hebrew school list. Why is that?
In this card pairing, we can see some of these events in the story of Moses and apply them to our own experience with this Sephirotic pairing in our lives. In the Ten of Wands, there is a man burdened by ten staves, carrying them toward a destination, just as Moses felt burdened by leading the people toward the Promised Land. And as we know, Moses got the people to the border but was not allowed to cross into the land himself.
In the Seven of Wands, we have a man facing off against would-be attackers. In this pairing, I think of this image as Moses telling Aaron to throw down his staff in the competition with Pharaoh’s priests. All their staves turn into snakes, but it is the snake born of Moses’s staff that eats all the others. In this Victory, Moses does not claim it for himself, for it belongs to YHVH. And he Perseveres, even as Pharaoh hardens his heart and changes his mind time and again.
The responsibility of Leadership was a burden to Moses, but he was able to carry it because he embodied the virtues of all the previous Sephirot, and this strengthened his Determination to guide his people toward their goal, even though he faced constant complaints and open revolt. Despite feeling discouraged and weighed down, he kept moving forward.
Of course, he was able to do this because he had a face-to-face relationship with YHVH. And because we’re in Malchut, the Sephira of the Shekinah, we are reminded that his spiritual source of strength was unified, both masculine and feminine (and beyond both). His experience of the Divine was both immanent and transcendent. And the tradition makes clear that there was only one Moses. No one else had that relationship with the Divine.
So what does this mean for us when we find ourselves in a position of Leadership or when we are inspired to take on a great work that promises much but also offers many burdens? The realization—the bringing into reality—of a vision requires marshaling the strengths of all the Sephirot within us. Because as we move ahead, there are always obstacles challenging us to face our very core. There is no room in this for complaint.
This is a tough one for me, because I was once a chronic complainer. Earlier, I wrote about the Ten of Wands and what I see as the culture of complaint. I still carry the voices of complaint in my head. I often refer to them as my inner Israelites. And this is when I need to call on my inner Moses. Moses complained too. The difference is that he shared his strength with the people, and he brought his complaints to YHVH. And the Divine hears all without complaint.
Day 28: Malchut of Netzach in B’riah
The Ten and Seven of Cups
_________within_________
There’s an advertisement for the “personal wealth management” division of a major bank that’s running as I write this. The image in the ad is of a kid in a candy store. You can see all the colorful jars of candy on display from the child’s point of view. The headline reads, “When was the last time you believed possibilities were really endless?”
I don’t believe the premise of this ad. They’re trying to convince their target audience that possibilities are indeed endless—especially if you have enough money to be a client. I oughta know. I used to write advertising for this bank. But the headline taps into several popular beliefs. First, the materialist’s belief that if you have money, anything is possible. Next, the “New Age”*31 belief that with the right amount of intention and spiritual concentration, you can “manifest” anything. Last, the belief that many American parents teach their children: you can grow up to do or be anything you want.
Why do I bring this up? Just look at the cards. Usually, the Ten of Cups is interpreted in a very positive light. It’s a lovely card, suggesting domestic joy. But when paired with the Seven of Cups, those cups in the rainbow might suggest a more illusory joy. It’s as though the joy of the family is not because they have enough—and enough is as good as a feast—but because they believe the future is filled with unlimited potential. The Seven of Cups suggests that belief is unrealistic.
In Genesis, the rainbow was the Divine promise not to bring destruction on humanity after the devastation of the biblical Flood. So the celebration in the Ten of Cups can simply be relief after a calamity has passed, with the parents telling their kids, “You can grow up to be anything.”
What happens when you give kids awards for everything? They grow up with the belief that they should be rewarded for everything. That is destructive to a child’s Netza
ch, undermining the ability to pursue goals with Consistency and Commitment.
I don’t want to be a Negative Nathan here, but there is a warning in this pairing. Yes, take joy in what you have. Yes, live with wonder and amazement at the Divine Presence throughout Creation. But don’t let complacency and satisfaction rob you of your Drive or confuse you into believing in endless possibility.
The Ten of Cups can also be seen as an illustration of the Jewish value of shalom bayit, literally meaning “peace of the home” but referring more specifically to peace in the relationship between spouses.*32 However, while this is a beautiful value to uphold, the Talmud suggests it’s okay to tell a lie in order to keep the peace in the family.15 Once again, we are faced with joy that has the possibility of being based in falsehood. Certainly, if you come from a family where there was the appearance of harmony and you learn that was based on untruth, that can rob you of your Netzach and make it harder for you to distinguish between illusion and reality.
At the same time, it is part of the daily liturgy to thank the Divine three times a day for the “miracles which are daily with us.”16 To live with the gratitude and amazement that we can see in the Ten of Cups. And here is the distinction: miracles are indeed everyday occurrences. The hummingbird at the feeder. A shooting star. Photosynthesis. Reality is indeed miraculous. Fantasies, unfortunately, are not reality. Find joy in the real world of Malchut, and the miracles are there. Look for fantasies, and your Netzach will desert you.
Day 28: Malchut of Netzach in Yetzirah
The Ten and Seven of Swords
_________within_________
Yesterday, in Yesod of Netzach in Yetzirah, I wrote about the crisis of faith the Israelites experienced after hearing the false report of giants in the Promised Land delivered by ten of the twelve spies. Even after all the miracles they had witnessed performed on their behalf, they still suffered from a slave mentality. In the story, YHVH decides that such people would not be fit to enter the land as a new people and that this slave generation had to die off before the Israelites could cross the Jordan. So YHVH decrees:
But as I live and as My glory fills the entire earth, none of the men who saw My glory and the signs I did in Egypt and in the wilderness, and yet who tested me these ten times and haven’t listened to My voice, surely not one of them will see the land I promised to their ancestors. None of them who treated me contemptuously will live to see it.17
Each and every one of those times is right there to be seen in the Ten of Swords. With each act of spiritual rebellion, the people were cutting themselves off from the future. The only people from that generation who entered the land were the two spies who gave a true report: Joshua and Caleb, who became the next generation of leaders after Moses.
We are more than halfway through the forty-nine-day period of the count. My experience with this discipline is that I Commit to it, I mess up a few days, I recommit, I miss a day, I recommit, I actively resist, then I get depressed, then I recommit again. It’s a process. And this process includes a dynamic I mentioned back on the fifth day: the Upper Limits Problem. As I’ve worked this discipline over the years, I’ve found that when I’m doing really well and I begin to feel a Sephirotic flow of energy throughout my body, I’ll do something to bring myself down. And often that something involves rationalizing a behavior that cuts me off from this flow. It’s that undermining of effort we see in the Seven of Swords. Except the deeper I get in this work, the more extreme are the thoughts and behaviors I can fall prey to that take me out of it.
The Ten of Swords is both a warning and a reminder. Because the story of the Israelites being punished by not being able to reach the promised land is not a story of being cut off by the Divine. It’s the story of a habit pattern of the mind that eventually cuts itself off from the Divine, that falls for the illusion that there is no possibility of t’shuvah, which means “return” or “repentance.” This is hitting bottom. But it’s not the truth, because there is always the possibility of return. That’s why the dawn is breaking in the distance in the Ten of Swords.*33
Rabbi Nachman of Breslov taught that no matter how far one may fall, never fall into despair, because a return to God is always possible—always.
Yes, we can all return. But Malchut of Netzach in Yetzirah tells us that Endurance is essential if we want to change. And that transformation is hard. We always think ahead to the beauty of the butterfly. But the caterpillar dies. Something has to die. And one of the dangers in this pair is the stubborn refusal to accept the end of something. Difficult energies indeed for this pairing on the twenty-eighth day.
Day 28: Malchut of Netzach in Assiyah
The Ten and Seven of Pentacles
_________within_________
And there came a man of God to Eli, and said to him, “Thus spoke YHVH: Did I not reveal myself to the house of your fathers when they were in bondage in Egypt to the house of Pharaoh?”
I SAMUEL 2:27
This is one of the biblical verses associated with Malchut in Assiyah in The Gates of Light by Joseph Gikatilla (as noted by Ronald Decker in The Esoteric Tarot), which connects it to the Ten of Pentacles in the pair above.18 Eli was the high priest at Shiloh in the days of the Judges, and the “man of God” had come to reprimand Eli and let him know that his sons would be punished for stealing from the sacrifice. When the Hebrew Scripture uses the phrase “man of God,” it can indeed refer to a person, but it can also refer to an angel, as was the case when Samson’s mother received the prophecy of Samson’s birth. All this is to note that when a “man of God” appears, whether a prophet or an angel, it is often to alert people to a level of reality of which they are usually unaware.
In the Ten of Pentacles, I think we are also receiving a visit from a “man of God.” The figures in the card are uninterested in the old man seated just outside the city gate. He is ignored by all except the dogs, and he sits patiently waiting to reveal himself when the time is right.
When will the time be right? The clue is in the pentacles suspended in the air in the form of the Tree of Life—and unseen by all. The ability to see these shining disks, representing all the Sephirot, announces the immanence of the Divine Shekinah. When you can see them, you have reached the goal of Kabbalistic work—the experience of Messianic Consciousness. However, that time is not yet for the figures in the card. They have yet to reach this level of awareness. But it is always within their reach.
Messianic Consciousness can be theirs if they work for it. If they make the Commitment shown in the Seven of Pentacles and they work their inner garden. The man in the card is seeing the first fruits of his work. He is not there yet, but he can see that he has made progress and that his Determination is being rewarded.
The pairing can also reveal possible imbalances in your experience of Malchut of Netzach in Assiyah. It points to the trap of becoming so involved in the work that the focus is only within and not on other people or one’s relationships. And without this dual inner/outer approach, ultimately, the fruits will wither on the vine.
Still, this pairing promises great rewards, and together these cards remind me of the promises of the ninth step in Alcoholics Anonymous: The Big Book:
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.19
At the end of Day 28, we are at the end of the fourth week and a little more than halfway through Counting the Omer. If you have been painstaking as you worked this path, you may already have had some moments of amazement. But whether quickly or slowly, the rewards will materialize if you work for them.
Questions for reflection and contemplation: Day 28
1. (Wands) Who are your inner Israelite complainers? Do they have a style or familiar subject of complaint that comes up regularly? How can you deal with them strictly but lovingly? Wha
t is your relationship to your inner Moses?
2. (Cups) There is a tradition in Judaism to say one hundred blessings a day. Spend today with an awareness of the everyday miracles that surround you. With each miracle, say this blessing to yourself:
Blessed is the One, Divine Source of all blessings, whose miracles I have witnessed in this place.
Count these blessings as you say them, and use your Netzach to set the goal of reaching one hundred blessings on this day.
3. (Swords) What has to die within you for you to be reborn spiritually? What are you refusing to let go of?
4. (Pentacles) As you do this inner work, review how your relationships have gone over the past twenty-eight days—or during any time you put toward a spiritual discipline. Is there any way in which your concentration on inner work has been detrimental to your relationships? If so, start taking action today to repair these breaks and consider what you can do moving forward to make those relationships an integral part of this work.
WEEK 5
Hod
HOD IS OFTEN TRANSLATED as “glory” or “splendor.” And one of my favorite lines in the liturgy is the angelic chant: “Holy, holy, holy, YHVH Tzevaot, the whole world is filled with His Glory.”1 This appeals to the panentheist in me, and I know that when I have been at my most balanced, I have been able to see glimpses of that Glory. Rabbi Min Kantrowitz offers an interpretation of Hod that suggests that seeing the Splendor of all Creation comes from an awareness that the Diversity of all Creation is holy.2 I like this a lot; it feels right that Nature’s Diversity is one of Hod’s essential qualities. One clue of how to reach the state of seeing the Splendor in all Creation is in another quality ascribed to Hod, Surrender. A healthy ego is essential to live in the world. But a healthy ego knows when to get out of the way, and Hod helps activate that.