by Mark Horn
In the Jewish mystical tradition, our turning to the Divine is in response to some apprehension of the Light, and by turning I mean not only seeking but also “turning,” as in t’shuvah. This turning of the heart away from unskillful action toward apprehension of the Light and then aligning one’s will with the greater Will is known as the arousal from below—Itaruta Diletata. It goes both ways, since when one aligns with the Divine, when one performs mitzvot, this creates an arousal that originates from above, known as the Itaruta Dile’eyla, which brings down blessings. I like that the word arousal, which in English has sexual connotations, is used for this spiritual attraction and Connection between humans and the Divine in this week of Yesod.
In Chesed of Yesod, we see that the Flow goes both ways. And if we can open our defenses, even just a little, like the man in the Nine of Wands, that Flow can heal our relationship to Intimacy with others and with the Divine Itself.
Day 36: Chesed of Yesod in B’riah
The Four and Nine of Cups
_________within_________
Two figures are seated, both with arms crossed. One looks uncertain as the Flow continues to offer him its blessings. The other looks smug and satisfied since he has received many blessings from this Flow, though his position suggests he is blocking it from continuing. In the Four of Cups, though, the young man’s legs are also crossed, while in the Nine of Cups, the older man’s legs are spread wide—not a surprise in a card associated with Yesod and sexual Connection.
One can view these two figures as the same person at different points in life, each with a different Relationship to the Flow of Love and the Flow of Intimate Connection. Perhaps the younger man does not feel worthy of this Flow of blessings. Or instead, the Infinite One keeps offering him the Flow of blessings, but he’s reacting like a petulant child because either they’re not exactly what he wants or not good enough for what he believes he deserves. Nevertheless, the cups keep coming so that by the time he is older he has amassed a table full of them that seem to extend even beyond what we can see, since the table and the row of cups are cut off at both ends. And indeed, each of the figures in the cards are also cut off—emotionally.
Rather than recognizing the impersonal nature of Divine Flow, the man in the Nine of Cups claims these blessings as his and his alone. He sits in the center as though he is the center of the universe and this is how he wants to present himself to the world. But is he really that smug and self-satisfied?
It could be that if he was the younger man who felt unworthy, now as an older man he feels like an impostor and hides this from others; thus, the tunic that covers him from his neck to his ankles and the tablecloth that hides what’s under the table.
There’s a famous story that originated with the great spiritual teacher and storyteller Rabbi Nachman of Breslov that this image brings to mind, “The Rooster Prince.”
There was once a prince who went insane: he believed he was a rooster, and so he took off all his clothes and stayed under a table pecking at scraps. The king and queen called in doctors and healers of all kinds, but none of them could cure the prince of his delusion until one day a wise man came to the palace and claimed he could restore the prince. The king and queen, desperate for help, agreed. So the wise man took off all his clothes and joined the prince under the table!
After some time the prince asked, “Who are you, and what are you doing here?”
The wise man, like many Jews, answered the question with a question, “And who are you, and what are you doing here?”
“I am a rooster,” said the prince.
“Me too,” said the wise man.
After a while, the wise man put on a shirt, and the prince asked him, “What are you doing?”
“What makes you think that a rooster can’t wear a shirt?” said the wise man. “You can wear a shirt and still be a rooster.” So the prince also put on a shirt.
Each day, the wise man put on a new article of clothing, and the prince questioned him in the same way. And then each day, the prince followed suit, until they were both fully, uh, suited up.
Next the wise man signaled the king’s servants to bring food on a plate from the table. And when he began to eat, he asked the prince, “What makes you think that you will stop being a rooster if you eat food from a plate? You can eat whatever you want and still be a rooster!” So the prince began to eat food from a plate.
The day came when the wise man asked the prince, “What makes you think a rooster must sit under the table? Even a rooster can sit at the table.” And when the wise man got up from under the table and rejoined the king and queen, the prince joined him, completely cured.
Well, at least the story says he was completely cured. But it doesn’t say that he no longer believed he was a rooster, just that it was okay for him, as a rooster, to dress, eat, and behave like a human. Now, Rabbi Nachman’s stories were all allegories, and every time there was a king in the story, it was clear he was speaking about God. So the rooster prince was understood as the Jews, who, having endured centuries of persecution and exile, had forgotten who they were. And the only one who could remind them of their former state was a wise rabbi, in this case Rabbi Nachman himself, who by telling the story was reminding his audience of Hasidim that they were royalty.
Why am I telling this story now? As a storyteller, when I look at the cards I am sometimes reminded of specific tales. And looking at these two cards, I think of the young man in the Four of Cups as someone who feels unworthy of the blessing of Divine Flow; he thinks of himself as somehow an impostor. So as he gets older, he decides to act out his feelings of unworthiness by believing he is a rooster and hiding under the table.
And in the Nine of Cups we see him after he has been “cured” by the wise man, so that once again, he is seated before a table. Except his red hat with a plume suggests that somewhere deep inside he still believes he’s a rooster, that he really isn’t worthy of all these blessings. And he keeps the tablecloth covering the table all the way down to the ground so that if he’s feeling a little, uh, peckish later on, he can go behind the tablecoth and peck at scraps underneath the table with no one seeing him. His “addiction” to acting like a rooster is somewhat under control inasmuch as he isn’t living under the table full-time. But because the root cause of his delusion, his feelings of unworthiness, hasn’t been addressed, he still keeps his arms crossed over his heart because he doesn’t feel worthy of Divine Love and Connection. There is a degree to which he still sees himself as an impostor, and this keeps him from showing his heart to another.
This is a tragic scenario, but it is not an uncommon dynamic. So what would help effect a real cure that goes to the root of the problem?
The issue goes right back to the Flow that is central to both Chesed and Yesod. One must participate in the Flow; by sharing the blessings instead of crossing his arms over his heart, the man in these cards could thus become Connected to others in a web of Relationship. He must learn that these blessings are not his alone, that they are meant to be shared. And by acting in a way that puts his self-interest to the side, he will become authentically interested in others. He will no longer feel like an impostor—or terminally unique—because he will see himself as part of a community.
You may not have had such an extreme experience as this, but if there is any way in which you are stopping the Flow because you feel unworthy, remember, you are royalty. And the gifts you receive are to be shared.
Day 36: Chesed of Yesod in Yetzirah
The Four and Nine of Swords
_________within_________
When you lay the Four and Nine of Swords side by side as you see in today’s illustration, the plane of the sarcophagus and the bed are such that the “pillow” on which the knight rests his head looks as though it could continue into the pillow of the figure in the bed. And as I looked at these two figures facing away from each other atop their respective “beds,” another image came to mind: the cherubim atop the Ark of the Covenant.
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There were very highly detailed instructions on how to build this sacred reliquary in Exodus, and atop the box were two cherubim. These angelic beings were not the cute little sanitized babies with wings you see on Valentine’s Day cards: they resembled the Egyptian sphinxes or the Babylonian shedu. They were hybrid beings, most likely with the body of a lion or a bull, the wings of an eagle, and the head of a human. If you’re of a certain age, your image of them is probably of the Ark as it was pictured in the Steven Spielberg movie Raiders of the Lost Ark. And this was inspired by the James Jacques Joseph Tissot painting of Moses and Joshua praying before the Ark, which gives the cherubim, portrayed as fully human-looking except for their wings, an art nouveau feel. In the painting, the cherubim face each other, and it is from the space between them that the voice of YHVH emanates. But in the tradition, the cherubim don’t always face each other. According to the Talmud, their faces would miraculously change direction depending on whether the people looking at them were living in harmony with the Torah. If the cherubim were facing each other, the people were living in harmony with the will of God. But if the cherubim were facing away from each other, that meant the people had fallen away from God.1
We are two weeks away from the hieros gamos of YHVH and the Shekinah, but when we look at the images of the Four and Nine of Swords, it seems we’re in need of some Divine Marriage counseling. There are still issues we need to face about the Relationship of our inner masculine and inner feminine, and there is little time left. And there may well be issues we need to address in our communication with a partner. So there is great urgency in the work of this week. And in particular, the work of this day.
Whether it’s an inner dialogue or a discussion with a partner about how the Relationship is structured and how that affects what gets spoken and what does not, the relentless forward energy of Chesed of Yesod pushes us to come, uh, face-to-face with anything that gets in the way of Love and spiritual or interpersonal (as though there’s a difference) Intimacy.
The figures in the cards depict the stereotypical male/female emotional split. In the Four of Swords, the man is in a place of silence. It is as though he has retreated from engagement and maintains an air of being above it all; he shows no emotion. Meanwhile, the figure in the Nine of Swords, which we’ll denote as female in this reading, is expressing great emotion. It’s a classic situation where the man holds his feelings in, which only makes the woman more emotional and unhappy. It’s a crazy-making dynamic for a woman since it denies her inner experience and it denies her the experience of Intimacy with a partner.
Whether an inner experience, an interpersonal experience, or both, this split must be healed for one to be whole. We must fully face each other if we want to see the Divine as Moses did, face-to-face.
Day 36: Chesed of Yesod in Assiyah
The Four and Nine of Pentacles
_________within_________
The male biblical figure associated with Yesod is Joseph, for his ability to withstand the seductive advances of Potiphar’s wife. I don’t see Joseph in this pairing, but I do see Potiphar and his wife. While Potiphar’s wife is not named in the Torah, she is given a name and a story in an Islamic telling of the story that I love very much, titled “Yusuf and Zulaikha.”
There are many versions of this story, and as in the biblical story, Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers and bought by Potiphar, who is often identified as the captain of the guard in Pharaoh’s palace. In these versions of the story, Joseph is described as so beautiful that no woman could look on him without falling in love with him, so that for Zulaikha to fall for him was not especially unusual. In fact, in the version of the story written by the Persian Sufi poet Jami, Joseph is described so erotically, and homoerotically, that even Potiphar finds himself attracted to the young man’s almost supernatural beauty. And as evidence of this breathtaking beauty, the story tells of Zulaikha’s inviting the neighboring wives to come for lunch because they had all been gossiping about her obsession with the young man. They were cutting oranges as he entered the room to serve them drinks, and in their amazement at his attractiveness, they all sliced their fingers without realizing it until he left the room.
What makes this Sufi version of the story so different from the biblical telling is that Zulaikha gave up everything for her love. She lost her husband, her home, and her social position. She sold what little was left of what she owned just to catch glimpses of him. Her own beauty faded, and she became blind. Yet her love did not die, and in fact, at the end of the story, her sight and her beauty are restored. The fire of her passion purified her love, and she was rewarded by God: Joseph found and married her. In this version by Jami, the story is an allegory of the soul’s yearning for the Divine. There is also much other Islamic poetry that is homoerotic and uses this desire as a metaphor for the soul’s desire for the Divine.
Of course, with Yesod, there is always the danger that this desire can stay on the earthly plane. In twelve-step programs for sexual compulsion, members are advised that when they see someone they find attractive, they should allow themselves to gaze on this beauty for three seconds and then look away while saying a prayer of gratitude to God for creating such beauty. This is not unlike the Baal Shem Tov’s instruction to find the root of good that is hidden in desire.
In this pairing, I look at the man in the Four of Pentacles as Potiphar; concerned only with his position and possessions, he is unaware of the star, the Divine, hidden within these material concerns, so that he is not participating with the Divine Flow. The woman in the garden in the Nine of Pentacles is Zulaikha, languishing alone because her husband’s attentions are elsewhere; the Flow of both Chesed and Yesod within her are damned up and awaiting the release that will come after she suffers for her love. For after all her suffering, an angel appeared with a message to Joseph from God telling him to marry her.
Mine eyes have seen her in humble mood;
I heard her prayer when to thee she sued.
At the sight of her labors, her prayers, and sighs,
The waves of the sea of My pity rise.
Her soul from the sword of despair I free,
And here from My throne I betroth her to thee.2
So may your soul be free from the sword of despair, and may you find in earthly Love and Intimacy the path to the Divine.
A quick sidenote on one other way to look at this pairing. Consider these images with the lyrics of the song “A Bird in a Gilded Cage.” There’s no question that the desire within Yesod can turn toward choosing a partner for material wealth. And this is just one of the many other ways you can go with this pairing. My focus on the story of Zulaikha is a reflection of my own experience of this pair in the count; remember you can go in lots of other directions as long as they capture a facet of the Sephirotic pairing of the day. I hope that my examples speak to you in some way, but if not, I hope my examples show you how to find your own way.
Questions for reflection and contemplation: Day 36
1. (Wands) What is your Relationship to your spiritual community? Is this a different community from the one you were born into? If so, what is your Relationship to that spiritual community too? Do you have more than one spiritual community? If so, do you notice playing them off against each other as a way to keep from going into deeper Relationship with one of them? Are there prayers or rituals that bring up your defenses? If so, why? How might you heal this dynamic?
2. (Cups) Are there any ways you feel unworthy of the blessings in your life? If so, why? Consider sharing your blessings in a new and different way, possibly with new people, as a way of finding and feeling your rightful place of Connection in the Divine Flow.
3. (Swords) If you are in a committed Relationship, initiate a conversation that invites your partner to share with you questions or concerns in your Relationship that have not been voiced—in ways that are not blaming but are simple statements of feeling. Search within yourself for similar thoughts and feelings. Share these with e
ach other while seated face-to-face and while reminding each other of the love and respect you have for each other. Then commit to working out any problems and recommit to each other. If you are not in a committed Relationship (and if you are you can also do this), have an inner dialogue between your inner masculine and inner feminine; ask both of them to share with the other the ways they feel welcomed by the other and then say what about them feels unwelcomed. Have both voice their fears or defenses around those traits and say why they might appear to the other to be unwelcomed. Then have each inner voice welcome the other fully, so that together they may enable you to feel and express the full range of emotions. Thank them—and yourself—for the courage to do this.
4. (Pentacles) Has there been someone in your life whom you loved obsessively, whom you desired in ways that tested your sense of reason? Regardless of what happened in this situation, write a letter (that you are not to send) thanking this person for showing you the depth of your heart and your yearning for the Divine. Explain that what drove you to such extremes of feeling or behavior was the depth of this Yearning—not as an excuse, but as a way of telling yourself that this person opened a gate in your heart to the Divine. If this is true, write that now you know how to Connect with the Divine on your own and that you sincerely wish that Connection for this person as well. When you’re done, burn the letter. If this is not something in your experience, in what ways do you see the Relationship between the couple in this card pairing as reflecting your own Relationships?
Day 37: Gevurah of Yesod
Setting Boundaries in Intimacy
Today is the thirty-seventh day of the Omer, which is five weeks and two days of the Omer.