As a little boy—and I’m sure many of you can relate—most of my time outside of school was spent playing outdoors. I don’t have many memories of doing things indoors. I rode my bike and played football and basketball with the neighborhood kids. Our birthday parties were outdoors. I sustained many injuries from playing on the swing set or jungle gym. I spent weekends at my grandparents’ farm exploring their huge property.
Boy, how things have changed. It’s strange being a witness to the digital age. Not that all technology is bad, but it has negatively affected our once active lifestyle. And no, it’s not technology’s fault. We as parents hold much of the blame for allowing our children to spend more time playing video games than playing in the yard.
The lifestyle of my three boys is much different than mine was. Like any other kid, they want the newest and coolest video games and systems (which seem to pop up every month). They have laptops, iPods, and TVs in their rooms. Since Amy and I have transformed our lifestyle for better health, we’ve made major changes in this area. We have set firm boundaries and rules in place to ensure that technology does not monopolize our family’s time, energy, or health.
Unfortunately, too many parents are not aware (or choose to ignore) how video games, TV, or the Internet have taken dominion over their household. But these things rule our homes. And we are reaping the consequences of that takeover. One major repercussion is obvious: we are continually becoming more sedentary.
A Couch Potato Society
Nielsen’s 2009 fourth-quarter “Three Screen Report”—a regular analysis from Nielsen that studies video viewing and related consumer behavior in the U.S.—reveals some sobering statistics. The biggest change in recent years has been that the average American has added more video platforms to their entertainment repertoire. Here’s what I mean.
• Each week the typical American watches almost 35 hours of TV; 2 hours of “timeshifted” (DVR) TV; 4 hours of Internet; 22 minutes of online video; and 4 minutes of mobile video.
• 59 percent of Americans now use TV and the Internet simultaneously at least once per month, spending 3.5 hours.
• Americans continue to increase their video use to new levels: TV +1 percent, timeshifting +25 percent, and online video +16 percent.
• Below is the breakdown on how children under the age of 18 spend their time per week on media-related devices:
Ages 2–11 Ages 12–17
On traditional TV 25:17 23:24
Watching timeshifted TV 1:33 1:15
Using the Internet 0:24 1:21
Watching video on Internet 0:04 0:15
Watching video on a mobile phone n/a 0:21
Source: The Nielsen Company
The average child spends way too much time sitting. Not only are our children inactive, but they are more likely to indulge in bad eating habits while watching TV or playing video games, causing unnecessary weight gain and health problems.
We need to teach our children to get up and move! It’s as simple as that. Exercise is not a means of physical torture or something reserved for gym class. Exercise is being active and moving around. That’s all. It’s real simple. It can be playing sports, taking dance classes, playing tag in the park, riding bikes, or running around with friends during recess.
The U.S. surgeon general and other leading medical experts recommend that children get an hour of exercise a day. Sadly, this is not happening. Less than one-third of kids aged 6 to 17 get at least 20 minutes of vigorous exercise a day. Why? They’re spending all their time watching YouTube videos, listening to their iPods, playing their Wii or DS, or watching TV.
But wait, there’s more! According to research by the Discovery Health Channel:
• 50 percent of children do not get enough exercise to develop healthy heart and lungs
• 98 percent of children have at least one heart disease risk
• 20 to 30 percent are already obese
Adults don’t fare much better.
• 64 percent don’t get enough exercise to maintain healthy heart and lungs
• 24 percent never exercise
• More than 35 percent are overweight
This should be a big “Ouch!” for many of us. Just remember all we talked about in chapter 3. Lead by example. If you don’t engage in an active lifestyle, what makes you think your kid will?
The Life-Changing Benefits of Exercise
The obvious plan of attack should be to exercise more as a family. Before we get into creative ways to incorporate a fit and active lifestyle into your home, let me tell you why exercise is necessary. Here are a few of the life-changing benefits of being physically active.
Relieves stress. Regular aerobic exercise releases hormones that give you a sense of well-being and relieve stress.
Alleviates depression. Regular physical activity increases serotonin, a brain chemical that fights negative thoughts and depression.
Boosts mood. Exercise also releases endorphins, powerful chemicals in our brain that give us energy and make us feel good.
Sharpens brainpower. Endorphins also help us focus and sharpen our mind.
Improves self-esteem. When you incorporate regular activity into your life, you take care of yourself and feel better which, in turn, can elevate a stronger sense of self.
Boosts energy. When you are active, your heart rate increases, which gives you extra energy for the rest of your day. Think of exercise as an energy booster.
Benefits overall health. Let’s not forget what exercise can do for your health! Do you want your children to have stronger muscles and bones? A leaner body? Less risk of becoming overweight? A decrease in the risk of diseases and medical conditions such as diabetes, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol? Of course you do!
All these benefits should motivate you to get up off the couch, grab your child by the hand, and head outdoors for a nature walk.
What Kind of Exercise Do We Need?
Don’t think of exercise as running on a treadmill like a hamster on a wheel. As I mentioned before, exercise can be equated with physical activity. Get off your behind and on your feet moving. It doesn’t have to take place in a gym with fancy and scary-looking equipment. It can be any physical activity that gets you breathing harder and raises your heart rate.
There are so many options—from playing a sport to housecleaning to riding a bike to jumping on a trampoline. I like to keep it simple when thinking of family exercise. If you exert energy doing something, you are being active, and that’s a good thing.
Remember the saying, “No pain, no gain”? Unfortunately, many people associate exercise with something that will make them hurt, and they shy away from it. After all, who wants to feel pain? But exercise doesn’t have to be painful, arduous, or feel like a chore. Exercise can be fun! Riding a bike is fun. Going hiking is fun. Playing catch with your son or daughter is fun. Running around on a beach and swimming is fun.
Rethink exercise as being active and having fun—a perfect combination.
Simple Steps to an Active Lifestyle
Family Power
So what now? If you are a parent who has not embraced physical activity in your home, you can make a change today. I believe incorporating good habits should flow from the head down. Lead your family into the joys, benefits, and fun of exercising. You’ll quickly see that the best way for your children to have a fit lifestyle is to make it a family thing.
Amy and I were asked recently to be the masters of ceremonies at a youth triathlon in our area. We were honored to be a part of this inspiring event and enjoyed the experience. I met many wonderful people and came home with fond, lasting memories. What struck me the most was how happy these kids were, even though they were competing so early on a Saturday morning. Many of them looked up to their parents, most of whom were runners themselves. The pattern was obvious. These kids were following their parents’ lead.
I like to say that a family that plays together stays together. I admire parents who come home fro
m work and shoot some hoops with their kid in their driveway or who go inline skating with them in the park on the weekends. Spending active time together increases the quality of your relationship and strengthens the bond with your child.
An active family is also a happy family. When we got back from The Biggest Loser, we started doing all sorts of fun activities we had never done before with our kids. For instance, when Amy and I won the prize to come home for a day, we took our kids hiking for the first time. It sparked a passion in our family that has continued since.
In one of our early hikes, our youngest son, Rhett, who was not used to exercising, started sweating profusely and complaining how strenuous it was. His voice still rings in my ears, “Dad! Mom! I’m tired! I hurt! My calories hurt!”
Rhett had been hearing us talk about calories so much, he didn’t know how to express the extent of his pain other than to say that everything hurt, even his calories. We all had a great laugh that afternoon, and as tired as Rhett was at the start of the hike, he felt like a million bucks toward the end. And he told us how much fun it was!
If I look back at our fondest family memories, I don’t remember the times we cleaned our house, took out the trash, played video games, or watched TV. I remember the moments we were together doing something active and fun, from going hiking at the state park to inline skating down the street to playing in the pool at the local YMCA.
Exercise with your kids. Be active with them and build playful memories they’ll never forget.
Get Moving
Here are some ideas to activate your family:
• Go for a walk after dinner. If you have young children, put them in a stroller.
• Walk the dog together (if you have one, of course). If not, you can always borrow a friend’s or family member’s dog that your child loves being around.
• Engage in seasonal activities. Go hiking, in-line skating, canoeing, swimming, or bicycling in the spring, summer, and fall. Try ice-skating or skiing in the winter.
• Do family chores together. Rake the leaves in the backyard with your child. Clean the car. Mow the lawn. Make it fun by charting with gold stars or another kind of treat how many chores your children did.
• Enroll your child in sports classes or fitness groups. See what your school or community offers that your child may be interested in. You may even join a gym that offers fitness programs for the young ones.
• Organize a “dance party” at your house one night. Rally your children to dress up in fancy clothes, put some dance music on the stereo, and spend an hour dancing and being silly with your kids. Younger children particularly love this.
• Go bowling.
• Learn martial arts.
• Have a weekly sports night. Try a new sport each week, such as tennis, golf, skating, and soccer. You’ve got a lot of options to try out.
• Run or walk for charity. Do some good and get your blood pumping.
• Promote movement in everyday activities. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Park farther from shopping center entrances. And even if you are watching TV, dance or do jumping jacks during the commercials. Have a contest to see who can do the most.
Motivate Your Child to Be Active
Kids are very different. My boys have different characteristics, personality traits, wants, and needs from each other. And they are motivated in different ways. When it comes to instilling fit habits in your home, you might have to motivate your child more or less than we have to motivate our boys. Some kids will have no problem with you telling them to drop the video-game controller and go outside to play. Others will groan, protest, and voice their annoyance every step of the way.
Also, children have different fitness levels. If your child is inactive, simply taking a walk with him or having her help around the house will help break this pattern. Slowly ease your children into physical activity. If they are moderately active, challenge them. Have their friends come over to play football or basketball. Explore new types of exercise with them. Find a list of activities at school or in the community and review them with your child. See what interests him or her.
However you decide to get your family up and moving, set a positive example and make sure you are having fun as well. If you’re not happy being active, I guarantee that your children will likewise be unhappy.
If your child is overweight or refuses to be active, don’t fall into the trap of enablement. You enable your child when you allow him (even if you have good intentions) to do things that are harmful or irresponsible. This happens when you rescue him from a situation instead of letting him deal with the consequences or let him get away with things instead of holding him accountable for his actions.
I know many parents who refuse to encourage their overweight child to be more physically active simply because their child expresses no interest. Some parents can even relate to their kid’s problem because they, too, were overweight as children and understand the hurt that comes from the ridicule of classmates. But if their style of managing the situation is to simply soothe the child and say, “Everything’s okay,” they are walking the thin line of enablement.
Empower your kids instead. Be the household motivator to change unhealthy behaviors or patterns instead of enabling your children to walk a permanent path of poor health. As a parent, you want the best for your children, so you need to be firm and be aware of the consequences of a sedentary lifestyle and poor nutrition habits.
Sure, it’s going to be hard for many kids in the beginning. They will whine. They will cry. They will complain. They may even be resentful. It’s okay! Change for any human being is uncomfortable.
But this is a great teaching moment. This is how your children learn that creating a future worth having requires doing the work. It requires making some changes. But it also can be fun and engaging.
Remember, if you want your children to
• feel better about themselves
• maintain a healthy weight
• build strong bones, muscles, and joints
• do better in school
• hit the path of adulthood with healthy habits
• sleep better
then adjust your current lifestyle to be more active. Keep it fun. Keep it positive. And keep it for the rest of your life!
Plan of Action
• Set a good example. Your children will follow your lead.
• Limit TV, computer, and video-game time.
• Promote activity, not exercise. Just get your kids off the couch and moving. And remember, all activity counts.
• Involve your entire family in physical activity to build a strong bond.
• Get your kids into the great outdoors as much as possible. Fresh air can do wonders for your child.
• Be the parent. Set rules and limits and do not enable your kids by letting them do what they want. Empower them for a healthy and fit future.
We know that in today’s fast-paced culture, families are busier than ever. Incorporating good health into your life means reexamining your priorities and figuring out how you can manage your time more wisely. We are living proof that it’s possible to be and stay healthy, even when life is full of demands and responsibilities.
6
Finding Balance
A Word from Amy
One thing about life never changes—it is always changing! You finally get settled in your new home, and your husband gets a new job in another state. You finally have some peace and quiet home from work one day, and your child gets sick at school and needs you to come get her. You are thrilled about your dream job, and a floundering economy forces you to shut down your business.
Change is also a constant in our health lifestyle. Does this sound familiar? You get excited about eating right and getting more exercise, but a stomach virus infects your house, and your family is stuck at home for days. Or after a solid number of weeks prioritizing your nutrition needs, your company sends you on a business trip, and you have to leav
e the kids with the hubby who thinks pizza is one of the four food groups, and you find yourself having to get by on airport food for a few days.
If we aren’t careful, these things can trip us up in our journey to good health. The key to having balance in the midst of life’s changes, bumps, twists, and detours is maintaining the right perspective. We can’t be so rigid that we don’t allow for flexibility sometimes. Life happens! If we let setbacks stop us from moving forward, then we’ll never accomplish our goals.
Most of you parents—especially you mothers—have the best intentions when it comes to planning and organizing. We would love nothing more than for our days, weeks, months, and years to go as smoothly as we have planned them. But that’s not going to happen. We need to expect the unexpected. When life puts a wrench in our plans, we need to regroup, reevaluate priorities and goals, and forge on ahead. Finding the balance between structure and flexibility is the goal we should strive toward.
Keys to Building Structure in Your Healthy Home
One thing that has helped Phillip and me win (most of the time) the battle of providing a health structure in our household is learning how to plan. Before our health transformation, we were “fly by the seat of our pants” kind of people. Our personalities are such that we tended to do everything at the last minute. If someone asked me on Wednesday what my plans for the weekend were, I wouldn’t have thought that far ahead. More oft than not, I would have my weekend plans figured out sometime on Friday.
Living this way caused us to waste time and money, not to mention the cost of bad eating habits. I used to think about the family’s dinner plans on my way home from work, and my solution usually involved ordering takeout or getting dinner at the drive-thru. Definitely not a healthy choice for a healthy family.
Phil Parham Page 7