by J. L. Murray
“That can't be easy for you,” I said. “Power can be a terrifying thing. Especially when you're the one wielding it.”
He smiled drily at me. “You will help me, then?”
“Yes,” I said.
“I will call the lords together,” said Lucifer. “I'll take you somewhere comfortable to wait.”
“Just one thing,” I said, taking a step toward him. “If you are using me for some other purpose, I will be very goddamn unhappy.”
He smiled. “I wouldn't dream of it.”
“You may be strong,” I said, “but Michael was strong, too. I have friends who would risk their lives to fight for me. Remember that.” Even as I said it though, I knew it was a lie. Almost everyone I knew was dead.
“I have the feeling,” Lucifer said slowly, “that someday you will be stronger than all of us.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, examining me again, but a slight smile stayed on his lips. “I have seen what has happened to you,” he said, his voice low. “You burned up on angel blood and the flames took every shred of human with it. It's the reason the angelwine affected you, you know. Your humanity. All that you had left when my dear brother brought you back was the soul of an archangel, and the half that you got from your father.”
“Pineme?” I said.
“The Watcher,” he said, his eyes dancing. I was reminded of the way Sam and I had found Lucifer hidden away in Sheol, half-mad and filled with a mixture of wonder and rage.
“Does that make a difference?” I said.
“Oh, yes,” he said. “The Watchers have far more power than the Arches. You may hate this new life of yours now.” Lucifer stepped toward me and leaned down until his face was so close that I could feel his breath on me. “But this is only the beginning.”
He straightened, and cleared his throat. His smile disappeared, and he frowned, the madness leaving his eyes. He looked down at me, as if he couldn't understand why I was there. “I'll show you to your room,” he said stiffly. He walked toward the black spire and opened a door I hadn't noticed set into the black stone. I stared at him for a moment. “Are you coming?” Lucifer said.
“Why not?” I said. I followed him into the tower.
The room Lucifer promptly left me in was bigger than my two-bedroom apartment. The walls were the same shining black stone of the spire outside. A fireplace as big as a car was set in the wall, empty and dark, with no sign that it had ever been used. Sconces set into the wall blazed with a magical light. I sat on the bed, the softest I had ever sat on. I lay back and stared at the high, black ceiling above me. I breathed in slowly and exhaled through my mouth.
For the first time in weeks, I felt no pain in my chest. Nothing pulled at me, and there was no anxiety or itchiness to set things right. There was only the sound of my breath and the sensation of my heart beating in my chest. I could feel the blood coursing through my veins and the heat rising off my body. I closed my eyes in relief. I could just stay here, live in Erebos and be away from the world. No spirits, no death, no pain.
Even as I thought it, I knew it could never happen. Without me in the world, the ghosts would just wander the world, empty and alone. I was the only one who could help them find peace. I had to find some way for that to be enough for me. But that didn't mean I couldn't enjoy the silence.
I must have dozed off, but I shot up when someone said my name. I looked around, panicked. It had been like someone speaking directly into my ear.
“Niki,” I heard the voice again. I looked around the room, but I was alone. The voice was a man's voice. It was faint, but I had heard it clear as day. There was a nudge in the back of my skull. A familiar sensation. I'd felt it many times over the past weeks, but thought nothing of it. But an idea occurred to me.
“Sam?” I said, unsure. I touched my head gingerly, wondering if I would be able to feel something. All I felt was hair.
“Niki,” said the voice again, growing fainter. It was hardly more than an echo. “Help him.”
“Help who?” I said. The nudging stopped. I waited, but there was no answer. “Help Lucifer?” My voice sounded dull in the stone room. “Sam, please don't go. Tell me what to do. I'm so lost. I don't even know who I am anymore.” But he was gone. I sat up and put my elbows on my knees, cradling my head with my hands. The silence, so welcome a short time ago, felt overwhelming now. Like a heavy pause when you're waiting for someone to speak again. But I knew I wouldn't hear Sam again. Not right now.
There was a knock on the door. I straightened. “Come in.”
A slight demon entered, his legs spindly and his horns hooked around his large ears. His skin was dusky gray. He blinked at me with wide, unassuming eyes. “Miss Slobodian?” he said.
“Yes,” I said. I tried to smile at him, but it wouldn't stick.
“Lucifer has sent for you, miss. He has assembled the lords.”
“I stood up. “Lead the way.”
The little demon bowed and backed away. I rolled my eyes when he finally turned around. This was the way the demons treated Death: with near-reverential deference. It came in handy at times, but I wasn't in the mood for bowing right now.
“You don't have to do that,” I said. The demon frowned at me and bowed again, then hurried through the dark stone halls.
The sconces glowed here too, though more dimly. The black floors and walls shone like dark mirrors. The demon led me to a stairwell, and we descended for what seemed like a very long time. When we finally emerged into yet another black hallway, the air was cold. I wrapped my jacket tighter around myself.
“Where are we?” I said.
“Underground,” said the demon. “We are below the tower. I am taking you to the most important meeting-place in Erebos.” His voice was full of pride, so I supposed that it was a big deal. We came to an archway and stepped through. The dark hallway opened up into a small room. The walls were just as black, but the light was brighter and warmer here. A large, ornate metal door decorated with strange symbols was set into the opposite wall. There were several elegant couches made of a rich black wood and covered with cushions that were shockingly white in all the darkness. Sitting on one of the couches was Eli Cooper.
“This is where I leave you,” said the demon. He bowed himself out of the room.
Eli stood up, looking surprised. His horns hadn't grown much since I'd seen him last, but a stony covering had crawled up his neck and face and covered his cheeks and forehead almost completely. It also covered the backs of his hands, the green so deep it was almost black.
“Niki?” he said. “What the hell are you doing here?”
Eli and I had dated and even lived together before I had been placed on the dreaded Registry, a blacklist for Abnormals like myself. Eli had been a police detective before his transformation began and he had come to Hell to find his real father. The last time I had seen him, he had refused to help us defeat Michael, choosing instead to stay in Erebos to help his ailing father, the demon Lord Grazial. I had not been happy with his decision.
“I was invited,” I said.
He was staring at me in a way that was making me uncomfortable. He knew. He knew what I was now, I could see it in his eyes.
“What the hell happened to you, Nik?” he said.
“Didn't you hear?” I said. “I got a promotion.”
He frowned at me, sitting back down. “I heard about Sam. I'm sorry.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Seriously?”
“Seriously,” he said. “He helped me when I needed it. For an angel, he wasn't half bad.” He tried for a smile, but he faltered. “So it's true, then.”
“What's true?” I said.
“You really are Death.”
“Everyone needs a hobby,” I said. “Mine just happens to be herding dead people.”
“Weird,” he said. “So why are you here?”
The metal door swung open and Lucifer stepped out. He saw me and smiled. “Good, you're here, Niki.” He didn't even glance at Eli. “Please, joi
n us.” I felt Eli's eyes burning into my back as I joined Lucifer, who swung the door shut with a clang behind me.
This room was far larger than the anteroom I had just left. Larger even than the bedroom I'd been holed up in. An enormous table sat in the middle, and around it, demons of every size, shape and color. I spotted Grazial who curled his lip when he saw me. At the end of the table sat an enormous demon that made the gigantic table look like a child's playset. He was even bigger than Abaddon had been, and Abaddon had been enormous. His skin was stony, as Eli's was becoming, and as jet black as the walls. Red eyes blazed from an enormous head, and polished horns circled around themselves in impressive spirals toward the back of his ridged skull. He watched me with keen interest as Lucifer motioned for me to sit next to him.
All eyes were on me.
SIX
“What is this?” Grazial wheezed. “Why have you brought her here?”
“Niki is my esteemed guest,” said Lucifer mildly. “And I'd be nicer to her if I were you.”
“I have no fear of offending Death,” said Grazial.
“Then you are a fool,” said Lucifer. “Think not of dying, Grazial. She has the power to make you live. Forever. Imagine your body wasting away while your mind stayed intact.” Lucifer's eyes had come alive again, and he seemed almost gleeful. “That would be tragic.”
I stared at Lucifer. I couldn't figure him out. He went from stodgy to crazy and back again. Even as I watched, he changed back to his stiff, calmer incarnation. Grazial was sneering at me. I smiled sweetly at him and he looked away, obviously disturbed. The giant at the end of the table hadn't stopped staring at me.
“Let us begin, shall we?” said Lucifer.
“You have nothing to say that I want to hear, Lucifer,” said a demon with red skin and small horns. “You want what has been ours for hundreds of years. You left. You cannot just come back and pretend nothing happened.”
“You are correct, Forcas,” said Lucifer. “It was wrong of me to leave. But surely you remember the circumstances? Your own brother was involved, after all.” Something flashed in Lucifer's eyes, but it was only for an instant.
Forcas shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “That was unfortunate,” he said. “But it doesn't change the fact that you abandoned your post. We have managed without you all this time. What reason do we have to take you back? It is like a slave being set free only to volunteer to become a slave once more.” There was a murmur of agreement. The demon at the end of the table still had not moved or spoken. Grazial was watching Lucifer with a calculating expression.
“There is no place for angels in Erebos,” said a greenish-black demon on the other side of the table from Forcas. “Go back to Briah where you belong.”
“You know I have never belonged in Briah, Eblis,” said Lucifer. His voice was still mild, but his eyes shifted from dark to jet black, shapes moving within like clouds in a hurricane. “Even without Michael, I would be an outcast there. Erebos is my home, whether you like it or no.”
The voices of the lords were rising, each shouting out his opinion on the matter. I watched Lucifer's face. A mad gleam had returned to his eyes. I wondered what he was capable of in that state. I reached out to touch his arm, to bring him back, but was startled by the roar of a booming voice.
“Enough!” shouted the demon at the end of the table, his red eyes blazing. He pounded a fist the size of a ham on the table and the wood cracked. The room was suddenly silent, the lords looking to the demon nervously. Lucifer's eyes had calmed.
“What say you, Lord Ba'al?” said Lucifer. I looked sharply at the demon. Sam had mentioned Ba'al the last time I had been to Erebos. I remembered that they had been friends.
Ba'al leaned back in his chair and surveyed the men sitting around the table. Then his eyes fell on me. “Let's hear from the girl,” he said, his voice impossibly deep. “What is your interest in the matter, Nikita Slobodian? What is Death doing siding with Lucifer?” He watched me. I looked at Lucifer, who nodded.
I cleared my throat. “I understand there have been many killings here,” I said, my voice shaky.
“Indeed,” said Ba'al. “Every night I hear the screams.” The other lords found other things to look at, avoiding eye contact with me or Ba'al.
“It needs to end,” I said, my voice growing stronger. “I see death every day. Often, it's brutal. I see the toll it takes on families, loved ones, bystanders. There is so much death, so many lives lost, so many families destroyed from these deaths that are not their fault. These deaths leave behind pain and tears and it breaks the people who are left behind.” I looked at Lucifer who was watching me, an indiscernible expression on his face. “These deaths, they can be stopped. Not by you or me or an army, but by coming together and allowing Lucifer to do what he does best. He is Justice. He will bring Erebos back. He will restore this city. Sometimes, even if you don't like the way something has to happen, it still has to happen.” I looked at the lords. “From what I understand, Lucifer has changed. Proof of that is that you are all still alive. Would the old Lucifer have been so kind?”
There was a whispering as the lords glanced at Lucifer. Ba'al watched me with interest. Lucifer's lips twitched into a wry smile, then he looked away, narrowing his eyes at the men around the table.
“But the Outsiders,” said Forcas. “They must pay.”
“The Outsiders shall pay nothing,” said Ba'al, his voice booming. Forcas flinched. They were obviously more afraid of Ba'al than they were of Lucifer. “We created the Outsiders by casting them out. Your revenge is unwanted and misplaced, Forcas. How many of theirs have your men killed? I'm sure it surpasses any damage they have done to you.” Ba'al's gaze moved to Lucifer. “I will support you,” he said. “As long as you are on the right side, I will be your ally.”
“Thank you,” said Lucifer.
Ba'al's support seemed to be a game-changer. Many of the lords groaned, but one by one they looked to Lucifer, mostly with disdain. “I will be your ally,” said Forcas. The same phrase was uttered over and over by all the lords until the only one left was Grazial. With a sneer he glared at Lucifer.
“I will be your ally,” he wheezed. Then he struggled to his feet and shuffled to the door, his back bent. He pulled at the heavy door, but it would not budge. He screamed in frustration. Lucifer calmly rose, opened the door for Grazial, and smiled graciously. Grazial narrowed his eyes and moved stiffly out of the room. Ba'al chuckled, a rumble deep in his throat. The lords rose, some of them bowing to Lucifer on the way out, but most of them striding past him without a glance.
I stood up and walked over to Ba'al, who hadn't risen. He looked at me, unsurprised.
“You knew Sam,” I said, sitting down next to him.
“I knew Samael,” he agreed. “I can see why he liked you. It takes strength to speak in light of those that hate. You did well.” He flared his nostrils as he looked at me. “You carry him with you. I can smell it. An Archangel's soul. Very interesting.”
“Is that why you agreed to help Lucifer?” I said.
“No,” he said. “I agreed to help Lucifer because he will do what is right. Too many people have died. And I think he does want to change. You were right about that; those lords would be dead if Lucifer had wanted it that way.”
“What about you?” I said.
He laughed. “Lucifer could not kill me. I'm far more ancient than he is. And far harder to kill.” He stood up, his head nearly grazing the ceiling. “The will to change is great, but I expect you to keep him in check. Even the greatest acts of will can be surpassed by our base natures. I know that maybe more than anyone.” He looked down at me. “Don't let him ruin it.”
When everyone had gone, Lucifer offered me his arm. “You did well,” he said. “Far better than I could have hoped. I never thought I would have Ba'al on my side.” I took his arm and we walked across the room.
“You two aren't close, I gather,” I said.
“That is putting it mildly,” he said.
He stopped and looked at me. “Thank you, Niki,” he said, his face gone completely serious. “Really, you have my appreciation. I owe you.”
I broke my eyes away from his. “You're welcome,” I said. My stomach growled and I realized I hadn't eaten in quite a while. I couldn't remember the last time. I hardly thought of eating any more. I remembered that Sam hadn't needed to eat as often either.
“I've arranged for us to share a meal,” said Lucifer, leading me out of the room. “If you're hungry, that is.” He smiled with his eyes.
“I could eat,” I said.
We walked out the door and came face to face with Eli. He looked from me to Lucifer and back to me. “You get around,” he said.
“Excuse me?” I said.
“Sam's barely gone and you're already with his brother.”
“I'm not with anyone, Eli. I suggest you get the hell out of my way.”
“Do you know who you're talking to, boy?” said Lucifer in a low voice. He bent over to look Eli in the eye. “Go back to your father, or I will gut you. We'll see how far we can take that little gift of yours.”
Eli took a step back. Lucifer's eyes were dancing again, and he started to grin. Eli started to back away. I rounded on Lucifer.
“Stop it,” I said.
“Stop what?” he said.
“I don't know why you keep going from zero to crazy, but do not think for one second that you can fight my battles for me. Understand? I'm not a goddamn damsel in distress.” I turned to Eli who was staring at Lucifer, probably seeing his little confrontation for what it was: a potentially deadly mistake. “Eli, wait,” I said. His eyes moved back to me. “There's something you need to know.”
“What?” he said irritably.
“Don't be an ass, Eli,” I said, matching his irritability. “It's important.” He relaxed slightly and took a tentative step toward me. I swallowed and took a breath. This was never going to be easy to say. Not ever. “Sofi died.”
Eli frowned, his twitchiness forgotten. He shook his head. “What?”