by Jill Cooper
“It’s happening, Tarnish,” Sebastian took my hands and helped me up to my feet. “You’re restoring the world.”
I shook my head. “We are, Sebastian.” Leaning forward, I gave him a warm hug. “We are.”
****
Those long days and nights walking through the sand dunes of the forgotten world brought great thirst and hunger. It also brought the notion life was brittle and my mission might end me. Now, I felt fears for myself subside and only feared what would happen to those left behind if I died.
Like the McRows. I had to complete my mission.
In the kitchen, I helped Claire prepare extra vegetables and I peeled some potatoes. Out in the living room, I heard children laughing, their little feet running up and down the stairwell toward the bedrooms and then down into the basement. It made everything feel so normal; that’s what life was here.
Normal.
I remembered my momma. How we had prepared countless meals together since I was a small child. How she kissed my cheeks at night when I was too exhausted to say anything, instead just listening.
Her eyes sparkled as she leaned over my bed and her cheeks shined rosy. “You’re such a normal girl, Abby,” she whispered as the light in my lantern flickered out. “Forget the dreams and everything you wish, and just be normal. Steady your heart, and no harm will come to you.”
Now my heart wondered what Momma had known and when she'd known it. Was she pregnant like Claire, or was it slowly revealed to her I was special? Was she horrified, or was she something else? I wish I could’ve asked her.
The farmhouse we were staying in was much different than what I was used to. For one, it was roomier than the living space above my father’s shop. The table off the kitchen was long but simply pieces of wood sanded down and fixed with sturdy legs. Equally simple square back chairs surrounded it, but Claire had dressed it up with some wooden bowls in the center, holding nuts and fruit.
I poured water into simple goblets around the table as others from the homestead started to make their way inside. By the time the smell of roasted chicken, potatoes, and peas wafted outside, there were twenty strong around the table. Everyone was excited to meet me, most with dirty brown hair and brown eyes, but a few like Claire stuck out from the pack. One man even had freckles across his nose and cheeks.
We made small talk. Where I was from, when did I discover I could read. The children especially listened to me with great attention. It was Claire, though, I watched as I spoke. There was something soothing about the way she sat back in her chair and simply stroked her pregnant belly, something about it calm and filled with love.
I liked her and wanted to spend more time with her, not like I had much to spare. I wish I did.
As I chewed on the moist and tender chicken, I had to ask her the question that had been on my mind since I arrived. “Don’t you worry about giving birth out here?”
A few laughed, but Claire only smiled as she caressed her side and gave her middle a happy smile. “We’ve all given birth out here. This is where we live. We laugh, we cry, eventually we’ll die when it is our time. We don’t choose it. Until it chooses us, we do the best we can.”
“Away from the ministers and their death hunters,” Henry grumbled as he reached for a roll in the center of the table. “Here we’re free. Life’s hard, chips fall where they may, but we’re free.”
“There are ravengers here,” another woman at the far end of the table said, “but they leave us alone long as we don’t antagonize them. Nothing would make us do that.”
“That’s your job,” Claire said with a laugh, and everyone at the table chuckled. I fell into an uneasy silence as I took stock in everything they said. Were they freer than the cities I had left behind? The answer was yes, of course they were, but were they safer? Was it so easy to trade safety for freedom?
The notion scared me. I wished Poppa was there to tell me what was right and what was wrong. The death hunters were wrong, that much I knew, but the answers after were much grayer. It seemed gray was all I had left, like the color of the sky.
Sebastian stroked my arm to get my attention. “Maybe tonight you can show them what you can do? Read a bit?”
Read? Was he crazy? My reading had gotten us into so much trouble. I took a shaking breath. “I don’t know if I can control it.”
“Oh, please,” the little girl asked with her fork still in her mouth.
“We love stories,” the little boy agreed. “If only for a little while.”
“I think you can do it,” Sebastian said. “Every day, you grow and become stronger. I see it in how you carry yourself now. You’ll never get a grip on your gift if you don’t try. Don’t you miss reading?”
I did. Oh, how I did. Licking my bottom lip, I nodded. “Tonight I’ll read before bed, but first I think dessert is in order.”
The children cheered, and Claire and I shared a smile before I headed into the kitchen to fetch the treat we had made. A cake covered in something called whipped cream and strawberries.
*****
Whipped cream was like pure magic, and together with strawberries... well, I thought that must be what heaven tastes like. “Thank you for doing this for me. I’ve never tasted anything like it,” I said to Claire.
We stood in the kitchen with the basin of soapy water between us. I washed the dishes, and she dried on an old, thin towel. Claire smiled as she stacked the plates tall. “It’s my pleasure. It’s you who is going out and risking her life for us. All of us, even those of us who don’t realize what it is you’re after.”
I wasn’t sure I knew what I was after, either. Freedom? The ability to go home and save my family and friends? Maybe I just wanted to save everyone.
After dishes were washed and the story had been read, I said goodnight to the children as I tucked them into their beds. There were ten children of various ages in the room, but all looked at me with wonder. I sat by the little girl’s bed and took the pieces of paper she clutched in her hands.
Stick figures, I mused with curiosity. She was trying her hand at drawing. Simple as it was, there was something beautiful about it. With care, I stowed them in her dresser and returned to her curious, wide eyes.
“What will happen to Master Frodo?”
“I don’t know.” I tucked the blanket around her and kissed her cheeks. “We’ll have to see what happens when we read tomorrow.”
“Will you be staying with us?” She asked the question with great expectation, looming thoughts playing out like a dance in the reflection of her eyes.
“No,” I admitted softly, unwilling to get her hopes up. “After breakfast, we’ll have to say goodbye.”
She sighed and gave me a brief scowl and twisted over to her side. “How will I find out if they ever make it?”
“I’ll have to read it to you when I come back this way. Maybe even teach you to read a few words.”
She gasped with excitement, her hands splayed out and her eyes widened with delight. “Promise you’ll be back?”
It was a promise I wished I could make, but maybe if I did, that’d just give me even a bigger reason to make the return journey. I hooked my pinky finger through hers and gave her a parting kiss on the cheek. “Promise.”
****
On the way out of the bedroom, I walked through the living room where a few people were still loitering by the fireplace. It was flickering out into ash, but a few orange ambers still danced among the stone. Sebastian eyed me, and I stood beside him, warming my hands by the fire, comfortable to return by his side again.
“A good night,” he said.
I agreed. “The best of nights.”
When I heard a creek behind me and found Claire on her way to the master bedroom, there was a crotchet shawl around her back, gathered through her elbows. Her simple elegance reminded me of Momma, even if Claire was younger. Sadly, my heart ached.
“Goodnight,” I said softly.
The skin wrinkled around her eyes as she smiled
at me. She came to my side, and we shared a long hug, filling me with a sense of warmth. “It’s a good life, Tarnish, but a hard one. In other words, thanks for all your help tonight. Just you being here gives us hope our children will have a better future, an easier future than we do.”
As she made her way around the back with careful steps, I thought about what she said. Maybe that’s what the first curator had simply wanted for her children; maybe that’s how all this started in the first place.
Sebastian grinned at me. “She likes you.”
“I like her, too.”
“All do. There’s something magical about her home and what she’d helped build. Do you feel it?”
I did. I certainly did. “I have magic,” I admitted aloud, “but I’m not the only one. Claire has magic, as does her daughter with her simple stick figure drawings. I hope my magic will enable them to keep theirs.”
Sebastian gazed at me with pride in his eyes. “Tarnish Rose, I do believe you’re growing right before my eyes.”
Bashfully, I laughed and turned my face away, but Sebastian placed his hand on my cheek, and I felt compelled to look at him. “I’ve never been more honored to know anyone.” He moved toward me, and I thought he meant to kiss me.
I panicked, and a squeak left my mouth as we were interrupted. A hurried series of knocks came quick at the front door. Thank the workmen. “Mayor McRow!” the voice called out on the other side. “Henry!”
Sebastian and I hurried to the door and saw one of the guardsmen from earlier. “We found them. Rebels, sir!” The guardsmen stepped back to reveal Markus and Penny, along with Lilith and a few others I had met in the museum.
“Father!” Sebastian opened his eyes wide as he hugged Markus. Everyone appeared well but tired and dirty.
“Oh son, I feared the worst for you as surely as I did for ourselves!” Markus patted him on the back.
I greeted and hugged Penny, Lilith and all the others, but the numbers were too few. Where were the others?
“You best get Henry down from wherever he’s sleeping,” Markus said to Sebastian, but he took my hands. “But first, dear Tarnish, the journey? Have you managed to….”
I nodded with happiness. “Two of three. It’s all coming together.”
Markus sighed with equal glee. “I want to hear all about it, but first let’s put on a kettle. I have warnings, large and small. It’s going to be a very long night.”
Chapter Twenty
Tarnish Rose
I poured hot water into tea mugs. Before long, everyone had one at the dining room table. Sebastian sat at the table beside Penny, even though they barely interacted. Still, there was a closeness to them the naked eye couldn’t miss. It just made me wonder even more about what Sebastian had tried to do.
He tried to kiss me even though he knew George was still alive. Maybe he was a prisoner, but he still lived. I couldn’t forget him. My heart would forever be his. Sebastian knew, but maybe he had forgotten. Now with Penny back, maybe he would remember.
I sat at the head of the table on the other side, putting distance between the three of us while the other side remained empty. It was saved for Henry.
Loudly, he clumped down the stairs. “Markus, you old bastard, you really know how to make an entrance, you know that?”
Markus laughed and rose to his feet to greet Henry with a warm hug. “Old friend, I wish I wasn’t calling on your doorstep, but I brought unwelcome news.” He returned to his seat and returned his gaze to Sebastian and then to me. “Haven’s been destroyed. Wiped off the map, if we still created things like maps.”
I held my breath, and Sebastian rushed on. We had been there just days ago, so how was that possible? Such news crushed my heart. “What do you mean destroyed? Rebecca? The farms? The people?”
“All of it.” Markus shook his head. “Burned the buildings, the crops destroyed, a few bodies found but not enough. Whatever tore through there, I fear we haven’t seen the last of them. They’re hunting for something.” He turned his eye to me. “It hunts you, Tarnish. Sent here, I fear, by Creighton himself.”
“Creighton can’t send hunters here.” Henry shook his head. “It’s never been done. She’d sense it and move to destroy them. Then she’d set her sights on Creighton, it’d break whatever peace exists between them.”
“What keeps us safe,” one of Henry’s men said, his eyes wide with fear.
He spoke of Temptress, I feared. “I brought this here to your town. I’m sorry, Mayor McRow. We’ll move. We’ll leave and hope they won’t arrive here.” I stood, but Henry wrapped his knuckles against the wooden tabletop while everyone else remained silent.
“We’re always talking about restoring the world, making the world a better place.” Henry pointed up the stairs. “For my children, for my pregnant wife. If we turn you away, Tarnish, if we refuse to help you only to help ourselves, what good are any of those words? Words are paramount. You know that.”
I did, but my throat thickened with regret and grief. I couldn’t watch more people get hurt, especially children, because of me.
“We go in the morning as planned,” Sebastian said. “We’ll leave first thing.”
“With horses and supplies,” Henry said. “It’s the least we can do.”
“We will stay behind,” Markus said as he rose to his feet. “Help you in any way we can. My rebels are very resourceful, we can strengthen your defenses.”
“Mighty as they are,” Henry added. “It’s good to have you back, Markus. It’s been too long.”
“It has, old friend. I’ll take care of things down here. Tell your wife I expect pancakes.” Markus rubbed his hands with glee.
“Your waistline doesn’t need pancakes,” Penny said with a laugh and covered her mouth.
I rose up, unhappy with the news Markus brought, but I was glad the people had fair warning. If nothing else, it was nice to see the smiles on their faces and Sebastian’s. “I’m going to get some sleep. A long day tomorrow. We head to get the last piece of the remnant.”
Markus’s eyes twinkled. “And where will the journey take you?”
“You don’t want to know,” Sebastian said. “It’ll be easier that way.” He stood and took my arm. “Goodnight, everyone. We will see you in the morning before we ship off.”
As we headed toward the door, I gripped his shirt. “You can stay here with your father and Penny. I don’t need a chaperone.”
His eyelid twitched as he scowled. “Tarnish—”
“No, she’s here. You’re here. George is… gone, trapped somewhere. I can’t get to him, but I won’t have you robbed of your happiness. You stay here with Penny. I’ll check around and make sure the children are safe, secure, and that Claire is okay with us staying. It’s her home, too. I won’t have Henry make all the choices for her.”
Sebastian let out a long breath while he studied me. Finally, he tilted his head and nodded. His fingers outstretched and grazed my own. It was hard to deny we had become closer over the last few days thanks to our quest, but my mind was still so focused on George. I didn’t welcome Sebastian’s affections, but I didn’t pull away from them, either.
It was nice to have a friend, to have some support. For all I knew, that was all he wished to convey, and I didn’t have the guts to ask.
“You’re becoming a leader right before my eyes. I couldn’t be prouder, and I thank you. I’ll take some time with my father and Penny, but I will find you before the night is done.”
I could deal with that.
****
While Tarnish went on her way, Sebastian found Penny in a back-storage room. The door was made of heavy planks of wood that grated against the stone floor. He was hit with a blast of cold. The room wasn’t insulated, and judging by the baskets of potatoes and carrots that lined the wall, it was a cool storage room, designed for winter.
It’d be here before long.
Shelves of jarred sauces, tomatoes, and bags of flour and sugar lined the walls. In the ce
nter of all of it, Penny stood. Simple Penny, with her elegant way of standing so erect even when she was exhausted. She had taken it upon herself to fold towels and blankets and was now beating dirt from the children’s linens. Silently, Sebastian watched her work. To gaze upon her again when he thought she might be dead was a gift.
Penny's profile turned toward him, and Sebastian could make out the gentle curve of her nose, her high cheekbones. Never plain, never boring, he had known her since before they could talk. Sebastian loved her from the very start.
“Come in if you want,” Penny said simply. She put down the children’s stuffed animals before turning around. Sebastian took in the flush of her cheeks from the cold and was at her side in a few long strides.
“I was so glad to see you were unharmed.” It was only then he allowed himself to stroke the long braids on either side of her head, his thumbs and fingers gently running along her soft hair, just about the only affection he ever allowed himself to express.
Sebastian didn’t know if Penny felt the same way, but as her brown eyes took him in, he saw her compassion and the devotion ready—if Sebastian asked for it.
Which was why he never could.
“It’s been a hard road.” The quiver in Penny’s voice betrayed her sadness. “So many of our friends lost. So many sacrificed to the ravengers. I was relieved when we reached here and overjoyed to see you and Tarnish Rose once more.” Her eyes fluttered away from me and down toward the ground.
“We leave first thing tomorrow to restart our quest. We’re close, Penny. So close.” Sebastian ran his hand along her cheek, feeling the curve of her jaw.
Penny closed her eyes, a puddle of tears clinging to her eyelashes. “It’s best you go to her then and leave me. I have a lot to prepare if we’re going to help the McRows and their settlement. They need a teacher.”
“You’re a great one at that. They’ll be lucky to have you.” His hand fell away from her, and he took a step back. “It was good to see you again, dearest friend.”