Khalid took a step back, looked at me. I looked back. “NO IDEA WHAT SHE’S TALKING ABOUT.”
“She wishes to possess one of us.”
Epsilon raised his hand. “I would find the experience interesting.”
Grandma shook her head again. “Nay. Flesh alone can hold me.”
I considered my maze of failsafes set up against mind control, and the fact that I really needed to be myself for the near future, weighed it against the ghostly possession I’d seen in various movies, and found it wanting. “IT CANNOT BE DIRE.”
“It cannot be me, either,” Khalid said. “Even if it was a good idea to have the only man who knows how to banish her possessed, it would take too long to undo my wards. She would fade before I was done. This leaves us with one option.”
The six of us looked to Vector.
“This is one of those big damn heroes moments, isn’t it?” Vector chewed his lips.
“I fade fast, strangers,” the shade whispered. Sure enough, she was winking out in my nightsight as I watched.
“VECTOR...”
“You owe me for this.” Vector took off his glasses, and shut his eyes. “Do it.”
The shade flowed over him, into him, seeping away like he was inhaling a cloud of ink. We watched in silence as he shuddered, and put his hands to his head.
“VECTOR?”
He breathed in, out, and pulled his hands away. “No,” he said. “This body feels strange.”
“HE’S MADE SOME MODIFICATIONS. BEST NOT TO PLAY WITH THEM.”
“I see ye, but where is the light? There is no light, how can I see?”
“COMPLICATED. COME, BACK TO THE VAN. WE NEED TO VACATE.” I was pretty sure that was a helicopter in the distance. Best not to complicate the lives of whoever was responding to this imagined emergency.
We walked back to the vehicle, and my minions chattered. “So what do we call him now?” Beta asked. “He’s not himself.”
“I dunno,” Alpha said. “Possessed Vector? Ghost holder Vector?”
“Professor Grandma?” Delta offered.
“Perhaps simply Professor. We don’t call him that normally, it would be a differentiation that would not alert outsiders.” Epsilon weighed in.
“Is that a concern?” Beta pointed out. “We can’t take him among outsiders without risking them, now. Not so long as Big Brother keeps watching us.”
“Why not just ask her?” Gamma mused. “Let’s do that. Hey, ghost!”
Vector didn’t respond, strolling through the trees with a surety he lacked in his normal gait. His body language was completely different, no hesitation in him at all, none of the exaggerated concern or paranoia I’d marked in his prior mannerisms. It was eerie, and a little concerning.
“GRANDMOTHER HAMPSTON,” I spoke up. “WHAT SHALL WE CALL YOU?”
The displaced witch considered it for a little while, smiled with a more honest expression than I’d ever previously seen on that face. “Dru, dear. It’s not me name, nor part of it, but it’ll do. Had a dear friend call me that before. I’ll know it when ye say it.” She glanced back in time to see the van at the edge of the road, just before the toppled trees. “Oh! Is that a lorry? They’ve gotten so strange since my day.”
“DRU. COME TOWARD THE BACK, THEN.”
“Get in the van!” Delta squealed. “We’ve got candy!”
“Do ye now...”
“Not really,” Beta said. “She’s making a bad joke.”
“Ah. Tsk.”
We piled in, and I hit the teleporter. One flash later, and Dru was looking at me wide-eyed.
I looked at Khalid. “WAIT, HOLD ON, CAN GHOSTS BE TELEPORTED?”
“When they are in a host, yes. Well, presumably. I do not know how your device works, my expertise only covers magical means of transport.”
“Dru?” Gamma asked.
“Yes dear?”
“We’re good.” Gamma announced, hopping out the back. “Vector turned the bathroom of his quarters into a pile of weeds and goo. I’ll go clear out another room and get her set up.”
“You don’t have to put yourself out for my sake dearie,” Dru dismounted from the van with care, then did a double take at the dimly-lit concrete garage around her. “Well! Lorries have gotten a lot faster since me day.”
I weighed the pros and cons of trying to explain the teleportation engine to the ghost of a lady who had lived all her years in a cottage in the woods before airplanes were a thing, and decided to let it drop.
Khalid tapped my pauldron. “We must speak.”
“AGREED.” I looked to Alpha. “GET DRU ANYTHING SHE NEEDS WITHIN REASON UNTIL THE ROOM IS CLEAR, MAKE SURE SHE’S COMFY.”
“Will do,” Alpha said. “I’ll check in with you if that ‘within reason’ part comes up, though.”
“FAIR ENOUGH.”
The possessed man wandered off with the rest of the minions. I reviewed my mental map of the bunker, and nodded. “CAN DIRE ASK YOU FOR AN EXAMINATION WHILE WE TALK?”
“Of course. Wait, you are wounded?”
“GOT KICKED IN THE SIDE BY A SPECTRAL HORSE. DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO STOP AND CHECK HOW BADLY.”
“Lead the way, please.”
It had been an old fallout shelter, once upon a time. A remnant of the cold war, built for some rich man who had lost his fortune in the eighties. Not far from Windsor, just remote enough from London that the teleporter could reach it without a boost, or in a pinch we could get there via the roads. Hadn’t needed that feature, but then we hadn’t planned for Sloth, either.
One of the benefits of this rich man’s paranoia was a serviceable sickbay. Alpha had taken charge of restocking the medicine and tools early on, and it paid off now. I decanted, slapped a surgical mask on to guard against lip-reading, and lay back on the table. Oh yeah, my side blazed with throbbing pain as I moved. No adrenaline left to shield me; I was feeling every bit of it now. I pulled up my shirt and hissed as Khalid probed the tennis-ball sized lump of bruises and bloody scabs.
But as he worked, his eyes never left my face.
“What?” I asked.
“What happened to Dire?”
“Mask up,” I reminded him, and he went and retrieved an operating mask. He slid his on with the ease of a professional... hell, he was a licensed doctor. Just happened to also be an immortal alchemist. I took a deep breath in his absence, testing my lungs. Right side still hurt like hell, but I’d definitely had worse.
He returned, digging into the medical kit on the table, and slathering my side with some sort of cream. “Again, I must ask, what happened to Dire?”
I blinked. “You aren’t making any more sense than the first—” oh, wait. “Ah. The hair.”
“Yes. That.” He pointed at my legs. “And that.” His finger moved up to point at my chest. “And those.” Then moved on up to tap my cheek. “And these. So again I ask, what has become of Doctor Dire?”
“She is here before you.” I shivered. Cold in here, all of a sudden. “Her face... it was altered.”
“And your voice, as well? Come, I remember you from the settlement. I do not recall your name, but I recall you and your child. I understand what has happened here, I think. There are those who follow a legacy, heroes whose masks are taken up by other heroes. For such an idealistic villain, a similar path is not inconceivable. But please, at least tell me how she died.”
A flash of pain, and I closed my eyes. An old memory, a curved blade biting through my chest, the silken ribbon of heat and agony as it sliced between my ribs, and blood surged up my throat.
“She’s not dead,” I whispered. “Dire is before you, Khalid, and she asks you to believe her. She couldn’t explain it to your satisfaction, but know that Minna’s sacrifice was great.”
“Minna.” Khalid tested it, nodded. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, a coldness looked back at me. “Yes, that was her name.”
He treated my wound in silence, bound it with gauze and tape. When it was done and I was pulling my
shirt back on, he washed his hands with his back to me. I didn’t understand what had come between us, and I hated it.
And in that hatred, I decided that I wasn’t going to take it.
“For the love of god, Khalid!” I burst out, slamming my hand on the table. He jumped, turned to face me. “No! Just no!”
“What is—”
“Her stupid freaking hero boyfriend lied to her, the villain she’s trying to take down fucking controls London from behind the scenes, and now there’s goddamn ghost faeries after her metal-plated ass! No! No you don’t get to sulk and judge and act forlorn!”
“I am not—”
“We are back in the dark city, Khalid! We’re back at war against the worst of the worst, there are way too many people on the line, and he’s literally going to conquer the world or worse if we fuck up! Whatever his plan is it’s horrible, and She. Needs. You. Not sulky you or distant you, but the you who had her back against the draugr. The you who came to back up her and Roy and Sparky. The you who, who...” ah damn, I was crying. “She needs. A friend. She needs you to be that friend. Whatever happened with, with Minna, it’s done and Dire’s lost too many friends to—”
Then he was hugging me, and I was hugging him back, and resting my chin on his head and bawling.
Total breach of kayfabe. Entirely unsuitable act for Doctor Dire, destroyer of dumbasses.
But fuck it; it had been a bad day. The worst twenty-four hours I’d had in a while.
After a time, my sobs faded to hiccups, and I looked down to see the top of Khalid’s head slimed with snot and tears where it had leaked from my mask. “Oh fuck. Sorry.”
He gave me one last squeeze and let go. Considerate enough to keep his arms low, I noticed. Avoiding my mega-bruise, thankfully. “It is fine. I apologize for giving you the wrong impression. It must have been a rough few years for you.”
“It was.” I sat back on the table. “Rewarding sometimes too, but damned if—” he winced, and I remembered he was very strongly Christian. “—sorry. Darned if she doesn’t have to work hard for every victory. Nothing comes easily, not even the things that should be a slam-dunk success. Still, she’s making progress.”
“I should say so.” He rubbed his hair, winced at the goo, and went back to rinsing his hands. “That was the Wyld Hunt. You ran them off like the lowest of leprechauns. That is no small thing. That is, in fact, pretty amazing.”
“What? They weren’t so bad.” I shrugged. “A few cheaty tricks, but iron put paid to them.”
“Iron is the only thing that mortals can bring to bear against them, and the Huntsman has millenia of close combat experience. Do not count what you have done here as minor. He will certainly not remember it so, for the next meeting.”
“Great. Although, Dire’s been wondering about this meeting, to tell the truth. Why was the Wyld Hunt here? Why would Lust send them after Dire, especially now?”
“I must admit to some puzzlement, myself. If indeed Lust has gone rogue, then it does not seem to benefit her to assault us. It is possible that we incurred her wrath by disturbing her grandmother’s rest. Or that they were tasked to watch this place, and given the right to hunt any who lingered too near the grave. Although...” his brow furrowed.
“Yes?”
“The Huntsman is nobility. Far above Lust in both status and power. She could not dictate terms to him, and he would be unlikely to work for her without major concessions. Her bindings and clout are all with low fae, the higher courts scorn her. Something is not adding up; the equation is false.”
I chewed my lip. Whatever it was, I could stand to sleep on it. We had won a small victory here, and I’d been running on power naps for too long. We had Dru, a relatively safe haven, and a situation that was unlikely to be made worse by eight hours of recovery. “Perhaps Dru will know. Dottie said her family specialized in dealing with the fae.”
“That does not lend me hope.” Khalid crossed his arms. “In my experience, those who deal with fae can be worse and more ruthless than those who deal with demons.”
“Oh come on, she seems nice enough,” I protested.
Alpha’s voice hissed in my ear, as the vox channel opened up. “Hey boss? Got some requests from Dru, want to check how reasonable they are.”
“Shoot.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re okay with the holly, mistletoe, and rowan shafts, but I figured you might have a few problems with the murderer’s hands, pounds of virgin’s fat, and live babies...”
CHAPTER 16: QUEEN’S COURT, QUEENSGUARD
“It's easier than you'd think to get to faerie. Harder to get back, mind you.”
--Susan Snell, minion and guardian of the Forbidden Apple gate.
“I only needed one child,” Dru griped.
“You’re not helping your case,” Alpha said.
I rolled my eyes, and tucked into breakfast. The eggs looked green through the night vision. Couldn’t eat through masks, and Sloth was still out there, so lipreading was still a thing. So darkness for all, with night vision to make sure nobody jammed sausage up their nose by accident.
English breakfast was one of the things I enjoyed the least about Britain. They had a sausage called spotted dick, and it looked like exactly what it sounded like. But Delta had prepared it, and the fried tomatoes and runny eggs and beans, so I ate for the calories and kept my criticisms to myself.
Truth be told, I was starving. I’d forgotten to eat yesterday, and well, spotted dick was the lesser of the two sins.
Speaking of which...
“There’s no other way to get to Lust’s realm?” My voice came out a bit more plaintive than I’d aimed for.
“There are probably several.” Khalid’s eyes didn’t leave Dru. His fork and knife moved like machinery, slicing through the tomatoes with precision. “However, I do not know of them. And since we are on a time limit now, searching around for a less-obtrusive entrance would incur more risk than we can probably afford.”
“Time limit?” I blinked. Sure, we had to rescue Acertijo before he succumbed to Lust’s wiles, but even if he had the situation wasn’t unsalvageable. Just had to kill her, and that would take care of the matter. Still, it was possible he meant something else.
“He’s talking about me, dear,” Dru said, through a mouthful of grapefruit. Her plate was heaped high with everything Delta had made, and she was demolishing it with gleeful abandon. I sincerely hoped that Vector didn’t have any food allergies, then the ludicrous nature of the concern hit me— there’s no way he wouldn’t have fixed those. Dru continued, between bites. “I can’t be holding on to this nice man’s body forever. Got until the next moon phase before I start slipping. Once that happens I’ll be as much use as a buggered hedgehog.”
I snorted bits of spotted dick onto my plate. Unexpected vulgarity, from such a sweet old lady... who knew how to sacrifice babies to make magical talismans. Okay, shouldn’t have been so unexpected. I nodded as I considered her words. “All right. So the sooner the better.” I sighed. “Open it is. Just going to have to take some precautions, especially after that heap of idiocy on the morning news.”
Beta reached over and patted my shoulder. “You knew it was going to happen.”
I had. Still, it had been a shitty thing to wake up to find that Britain was blaming the entire mess in Southwark and Harrod’s on me. At least the teleported people had been found in Mariposa, which didn’t help my case as much as I’d thought.
“To be fair, you’ve done big destructive rampages before, boss.”
“Only very small ones. And there was a perfectly good reason for that, thank you very much.” I sliced my eggs, and glared at Alpha. He shrugged, unfazed. He and his compatriots were arranged around us like statues, up until the point the dishes needed changing or one of us needed a refill. I didn’t mind it so much, but Khalid kept shooting them little glances.
I wasn’t the only one that noticed that. Gamma met his gaze with her eyesockets, and raised a hand, turning it t
o the side. “What?”
“It is not often that I see something entirely new.”
“We’re hardly the first androids that were ever made.” Beta said.
“I have seen many automatons in my time, but there is something different about you.”
“Good or bad?” Delta asked. “Please be good, please be good, please be good...”
“Different. You seem almost like whole people. In others such as you, there is always an otherworldly quality, a sense of wrongness. You, if you had skin, I could easily mistake for humans.”
“Skin is actually on the agenda at some point,” I said, gesturing to Dru. “Dire was going to talk to Vector about that when he’s himself again.”
That got a response. The lot of them turned to me, started talking at once, then froze after a split-second. I saw them glance to each other, in that silent communication they had over their own network.
All but Epsilon. He pulled over a chair, and sat next to Khalid. “I think it comes from our social heuristics.”
“Excuse me?” Khalid frowned. “I do not think I know that word.”
“Heuristic; process or method.” Epsilon steepled his fingers. “Originally we started as fragments of Alpha, with his persona stripped out. He was planning to let us grow and develop through simulations, but the time frame was infeasible due to Maestro M’s assault on Dire. So instead he gave us access to various social networks, and set us up with basic chat algorithms.”
“You learned to be human from things like Myfacejournal?” Khalid’s eyes widened. “Dear God. The comments and memes on that infernal program...”
“We had some constraints. Though it took serious work to avoid picking up bad habits and counterproductive language from various inefficient human sub-groups.”
“I swear, I never want to hear the word ’Cuck’ again,” Delta muttered. “Still mad you didn’t let me blow up their computers.”
“Half of them were on phones, D,” Gamma said.
“Phones are even easier to blow up!” Delta waved her arms in frustration.
“You can do that?” Khalid asked.
“And more,” I confirmed. “Dire once used sonics to blow up a man’s head over the phone.” Khalid’s expression shifted to pure horror. “Uh, he had it coming,” I added.
DIRE:SINS (The Dire Saga Book 5) Page 19