by Josie Kerr
When she told Em about that last visit, Em said, “He needs a good pinch, is what he needs. Stupid asshat.”
Bailey shook her head and straightened her back. She could do this. “I’m not looking forward to it, but I’ll be fine. I’m more worried about Colin.”
“Do you have any idea how he’s feeling about this? Does he know?”
Bailey sighed. “I haven’t told him yet. I didn’t want to tell him over the phone and he’s been at the gym a lot lately, really trying to get things up and running. I don’t want this crap with Tripp to affect this expo fight that he’s thinking about. There’s more to this rematch than he’s letting on.”
Em gave Bailey’s arm a pat. “It’ll all work out. Colin’s a good guy.”
Bailey nodded. “Yep, he is.” She wiped a tear from her eye and blew out a breath.
Em’s face softened. “You really care about him, don’t you?”
Bailey swallowed hard. “Yes, I do.” She chuckled and blew out another breath. “Wow. That was scary.”
“I take it you haven’t told him,” Em said. “Has he said anything?”
Bailey shook her head. “No, he hasn’t, but I’ve heard him talking to Maude. He’s told her that he loves me.” Bailey blinked away more tears. “I guess it’s time we really talked about...us.”
Em nodded, but had a funny look on her face.
“What are you thinking about over there, Em? I don’t like it when you get that look on your face.”
“I bet Colin can pinch really hard.”
Colin sat outside and stared into the fire after Bailey had told him of Tripp’s imminent release from jail. She had tried to reassure him about his place in Maude’s life, but Colin was still uneasy. She had looked like she wanted to say something else and in fact had called his name, but then she just shrugged and had gone into the house.
Maude had just celebrated her half birthday, a half birthday that he biological father had missed because he was incarcerated. Colin had never met the man, but he knew that Rory and Ashley had disliked him long before he broke into Em’s apartment and assaulted her. He also knew that Mick had threatened him and his normally somewhat easy-going brother could barely contain his ire when Tripp’s name came up.
And poor Bailey had to deal with this jackass for the rest of her life.
Colin had been furious when he arrived home to find Bailey in tears after her last trip to the jail, and was halfway tempted to go introduce himself to Tripp, just to lay things out on the table.
The problem was, things between Colin and Bailey weren’t out on the table. He cared deeply about the woman, and he thought that she cared for him as well, but neither of them had expressly told the other one their feelings. Things were comfortable. They had a routine, like a little family. They shared meals, and pick-ups and drop-offs, and most nights, a bed.
But Colin wasn’t Maude’s father, and with her biological father’s re-entry into her life, Colin didn’t know exactly what his place was.
He was still ruminating when he felt a soft hand on his shoulder. Normally he would have jerked and probably punched out whoever touched him, but he could smell the fresh scent of Bailey’s body wash as soon as she stepped behind him.
“Are you all right, Colin?” Bailey rested a hand on each shoulder. When Colin tilted his back to look at her, she moved her hands to cup his jaw, petting his beard and stroking his neck.
Colin inhaled and slowly blinked. “I love you, Bailey.” He held his breath until she smiled.
“I love you, too, Colin.”
Colin grasped her hands and put them to his lips as he closed his eyes in a quick, silent prayer of thanks. When he opened his eyes again, Bailey was smiling and nodding, her eyes bright with tears that sparkled in the firelight. He kissed the palms of her hands again and then moved his arms to tug her down to him so he could kiss her mouth.
“What can I do to help?” he asked, his head still tilted back.
“Keep loving me,” she said. “All you need to do is keep loving me.”
Yeah, I can do that.
Chapter Nineteen
“I want to wake up every morning and see this,” Colin said. He looked up at Bailey and Maude with adoring, sleepy eyes.
Bailey chuckled. She was nestled back in the pillows, nursing Maude. She stroked Colin’s cheek with her free hand, running her fingers over his jaw.
“I like this,” she said, indicating his beard.
Maude detached from her breast with a pop and Colin breathed a soft laugh. Bailey settled down into the bed, the baby nestled between them. Colin ran a finger over the now-sleeping baby’s ear, a thoughtful look on his face.
“What are you thinking?” Bailey asked, not really sure she wanted to know.
“I wish,” he said after a moment, “that I was her father.”
“Oh, Colin, you’re more, you know?”
Colin looked at her, a heartbreaking expression on his face.
“Tripp’s her father, Colin. But you? I think of you as her daddy.”
“That’s what they called me at the hospital when she was born.”
“I know, and it’s accurate.”
They lay in the bed, gazing at the baby and each other, for a long time.
“I have to see Tripp today,” Bailey said.
“I know. Do you need me to go with you?” Colin asked.
“No, that’ll just set him off. It will be fine. We’ll figure out visitation details and we’ll all move on.”
“What time do you go?”
“I have to call. I hope this morning, so I can get things over with, prove that I’m not going to keep Tripp’s daughter from him, if he wants to see her.”
Bailey had very complicated feelings about Tripp. On the one hand, Maude was his daughter and he had a right to see her. But on the other hand, Tripp had emotionally and somewhat physically abandoned them as soon as Bailey’s pregnancy started to show.
And there was the whole nasty assault incident. Bailey didn’t think that Tripp would ever hurt Maude, but then, she never thought things would go as far as they did with Em.
Colin kissed her on the cheek, pulling her out of her thoughts. “I need to go to the gym. The morning crowd will be ready to get in there and sweat. You sure you don’t want me to come with you?”
“No, I’ll be fine.”
Colin looked at Bailey, searching her eyes for any fear at all. She gazed steadily at him. That’s my fierce girl. Colin grinned at her, gave her a kiss and the baby a kiss, and rolled out of bed.
Okay, Bailey, you can do this. You can do this with no problem. You’ve faced bigger assholes and worse situations than Tripp Holbrook.
Bailey squared her shoulders, readjusted Maude’s position on her hip, and rang the doorbell to the Holbrook’s Buckhead mansion.
Madeleine Holbrook answered the door with a huge smile.
“Bailey! Come on in, sweetheart,” she said as she kissed Bailey on the cheek. “We’ve missed you so much.”
“Oh, me too,” Bailey said, with genuine feeling, at least directed to Madeleine.
“Let’s go to the sunroom, shall we? Tripp will be down in a moment. He went to the office for a bit this morning to get settled in.”
“Where’s he working now?” Bailey asked as they walked to the sunroom.
“Oh, he’s still at the Holbrook Firm, but of course he couldn’t retain his position, not with a felony conviction. He’s the mailroom supervisor.”
A bleat of laughter escaped Bailey’s lips before she could stop it. Madeleine rolled her eyes. “Oh, honey, I know. He is not happy, but he should be damn thankful that his father didn’t just fire him and make him look for a job on his own.”
Bailey made sure that she was in the large wingback chair and not on the loveseat. She might need to make nice with Tripp for her daughter’s sake, but she sure as hell wasn’t going to sit with him.
Tripp came downstairs
and Bailey took a good, long look at him, and nope, she had no idea what in world she was thinking. Actually, she did, and she cringed at the thought. Ugh. Especially when she compared Tripp to Colin, which she knew wasn’t fair to either one of them.
“You look good, Tripp.” And he did. But it wasn’t at all what she wanted or needed. Even with his new more-muscular physique, he was prissy, so, so prissy.
“Thanks.”
He sat on the couch opposite and looked at Bailey and his daughter. “Maude, I’m your father.” Maude sat quietly on Bailey’s lap, a soft rag bunny in her hands. Tripp frowned. “Maude, I’m your father,” he repeated. “What’s wrong with her?”
“Tripp, she’s seven months old. You’re not going to have a conversation with her. I mean, you can, but she’s not going to discuss literature or anything.”
Maude continued to look suspiciously at Tripp.
“All right, since you don’t seem to be in a social mood, let’s just get down to business. I want to see her a couple of times a week at my apartment.”
Bailey frowned. “You’re not living here?”
“No, Mama thinks it’s a good idea that I not live here. We have a corporate apartment in Alpharetta that I’m living in for the time being.”
“Oh, I know that apartment. That’s a nice area and it’s not too terribly far from the office.” When Tripp made a face, Bailey admitted that the commute was probably terrible. “Well, it could be worse, right? You could have to take MARTA.” Tripp looked so horrified at the idea of public transportation that she couldn’t help but laugh.
“Regardless, Tripp, I don’t feel comfortable leaving Maude with you for more than a couple of hours, at the most.”
“Why the hell not? She’s my kid, too.”
“Well, one, you have a conviction for assault, and do not make any excuses about anything, and two, I just don’t think you can handle it.”
“What was all that bullshit about you wanting me to have a relationship with her?”
“You were the one dragging your feet, Tripp. My lawyer tried to work with you but you didn’t ever respond. We can’t have a discussion if you won’t talk to me.”
They sat and stared at each other.
“I see this is going swimmingly,” Madeleine said with a forced, bright smile. “Tripp, have you held Maude yet?”
“No, he hasn’t,” Bailey said.
“I haven’t had the chance because she’s got my daughter in a death grip.”
Bailey stood up and tried to hand Tripp his daughter, but Maude was having none of it. She arched her back and stiffened, hanging on to Bailey’s blouse and her hair tightly. When Bailey put her on Tripp’s lap, Maude got a panicked look on her face and immediately tried to launch herself back to her mother.
Tripp, to his credit, held the little girl firmly but gently. “Hey there, baby girl, I’m your Daddy.”
“Don’t call her that.” And don’t call yourself that.
“Why the hell not? She is my baby girl.”
“I just don’t like that endearment, that’s all.” Bailey sat back down in the wingback chair. Maude wasn’t crying, but she still obviously wasn’t happy being in Tripp’s lap, and Tripp seemed to be as unsure with the situation as his daughter was.
Bailey turned to Tripp’s mother. “Madeleine, would you be willing to supervise visitations between Maude and her father, at least until he gets more at ease around a baby? I would feel more comfortable if there was someone that Tripp could instantly get feedback if he has any questions.”
Tripp scoffed. “Like you have help with her.”
“I do, Tripp. I have Em, and Mick, and Colin.”
For fuck’s sake, would he ever get Em and that fucking giant-ass lumberjack out of his life? And who the fuck was Colin? “Colin? Who the hell is Colin?”
“Colin Carmichael. He lives next door.” And is the brother of a man you hate.
“You said that the landlord lives next door. What? You’re letting your landlord keep the kid?”
“He’s more than my landlord, Tripp. We’re seeing each other.”
He barked a laugh. “Wow. Didn’t take you long to hook up with another paycheck, did it? Who’s he? A developer at Tara Security? A real estate guy?”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but he owns DS Fight Club.”
“Jesus, Bailey. A fighter? I know you came from the trailer park, but really. You’ve got a kid, now. You’ve got my kid now.”
Bailey just rolled her eyes and scoffed, but Madeleine was having none of it. “Tripp, I would remind you that it is in everybody’s best interest to remain somewhat amicable. So yes, Bailey, I will be happy to supervise visitation. It’ll be a chance for Tripp and me to catch up as well.”
“Then it’s settled. Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday from six to eight o’clock, at least for a while. We can revisit this when Madeleine thinks you’re comfortable.” Bailey looked long and hard at Tripp.
“That’s fine.”
“Good,” Bailey said, smiling sweetly.
Chapter Twenty
If ever Bailey needed a drink, she needed one after that. She would settle for a milk shake and a soak in a hot bath. Or maybe a milk shake while soaking in a hot bath. Yes, that’s exactly what she would do as soon as Maude went down for the night.
Her phone buzzed with a text message, so she pulled over to read it.
Hope the meeting with Assclown is going well and you are kicking his butt. ;)
Bailey laughed and shook her head. Colin was funny. She looked at the dashboard clock. He should just be finishing up his last class, and perhaps Paddy would be there as well. She should drop by the gym before going home. She knew that some of the guys would want to see the baby.
She made her way to the gym, her excitement to see Colin building. She loved watching him work that big body of his. God, she was horny and had been since the morning. She and Colin had done nothing except for hold each other during the night, which was so nice, but she way more than ready to do more than that. Maybe she could forego the bath and milk shake and relax with Colin.
She pulled into the gym parking lot and spotted a space right next to the door. Maybe the fates were smiling on her because she had to deal with Tripp today. She snorted. She popped out of the car, gathered baby Maude, and made her way into the gym.
She inhaled deeply. There it was – that specific combination of man, leather, and sweat that made up Eau de Gym. It was a long time since she had been able to not get physically ill when she smelled that particular scent, but she reminded herself that Colin’s gym was definitely not the same type of gym that her father frequented. She made her way through the gym, for Colin among the many men in the place.
Man, he wasn’t kidding that DS was doing well. There were men everywhere and almost all the equipment was being used. She stretched on her toes to see if Colin was sparring in the octagon. Yes, there he was. She made her way through the maze of equipment, some of the guys looking at her funny. She was sure she was quite a sight. She had dressed up some to see Tripp, where dressing up included wearing the giant nursing bra that she hated and pants instead of only a pair of underwear and one of Colin’s soft button-down shirts. Still, she looked out of place among the sweaty, grunting men.
Junior was watching Colin spar with another big fighter, but she caught his eye and he grinned hugely and winked. She really liked the trainer. He was another one that was rough around the edges but had a very sweet center. He told it like it was and wasn’t afraid to go head-to-head with Colin when he was in one of his more stubborn moods. Bailey walked over the edge of the cage and Junior gave her a hug.
“Hey, mami! I was wondering why guys all suddenly started working out really hard. Should have known there was pretty woman walking through the gym for them to show off for.” Junior bent down and began making faces and talking in a silly voice in Spanish. Bailey just shook her head.
“So what b
rings you to this smelly, testosterone-laden place?” Junior asked when he had his fill of the baby.
“I was coming back from Tripp’s,” she laughed when Junior made a face, “and thought I would see when Colin thought he was going to be free.”
“I’ll tell you when he’s free, Bailey.” Junior turned toward the cage and whistled sharply through his teeth. “HEY! Sparring’s over! Give me twenty on the treadmill!”
Colin got ready to gripe but then he saw Bailey. The fighter that he was sparring with had already scurried to the treadmill to avoid having to do more legwork.
“Hey, babydoll.” Colin grinned and placed a sweet kiss on Bailey’s forehead. “I missed you today. And hey little babydoll,” he added, running a finger over Maude’s cheek. “I missed you today, too.”
“Oh Dios,” Junior muttered. “C, get your ass home and take care of your woman and baby. You’ve been here all day.”
“You’ve been here since six, Junior. I came in at nine.”
“Six, schmix. Go!” Junior winked at Colin.
“Do you mind waiting for me to take a quick shower, Bailey? I want to take my girls to dinner and the only place that I’m fit for is that smelly taco stand down the street.”
Bailey looked around the gym anxiously, but Colin soothed her with a kiss before he took her hand and led her to his office.
Junior popped his head in the door and held out his hands. “Let me take mami for a few. She can help me do some recruiting,” he said with a wink. He took Maude from Bailey’s arms and made his way to the classrooms at the back of the gym.
“You’re stinky, Colin. Go shower. I’m gonna just sit on this nice couch and close my eyes for a moment.”