PAUL: SO! — it is Mademoiselle Jeannette who is my laundress! Why did you not let me know of this before?
JEANNE [embarrassed]: Because — because —
PAUL: Well? [Silence; aside] How is this? Dominique told me — [Aloud] Let me see the other basket.
JEANNE [seizes his hand]: Take care! You will break them!
PAUL: Break what?
JEANNE: The eggs.
PAUL [looks into second basket]: Fruit, rolls, — yes, even a little pot of cream! And it was for me? [Looks at Jeanne; she nods] Well, to tell the truth, my child, just at present I cannot pay you for these things. [Silence] Ah, I see! The friendship of my servant has reduced me to receiving charity from a peasant! [Roughly] Take away all that stuff, Jeanne! I won't have it! Go away!
JEANNE [weeps]: If I had known you would be angry, I should not have done it!
PAUL [aside]: She weeps! And in my idiotic pride and vanity I have wounded her. Where else have I ever found such devotion? [Aloud] No, remain here! Pardon me. I have not been well for some time. Tell me — how long have you been coming here like this every day?
JEANNE: Almost a month.
PAUL: And you never boasted of it! You did it simply, kindly, in the candour and naïveté of your sweet soul! [Takes her hands] I can see that your little heart is throbbing fast! You have lovely eyes, my Jeannette. [Aside] I never looked at them before, blind fool that I was! [Aloud] And these poor little hands! Do you know, if they were covered with fine gloves, more than one fashionable lady would envy you their grace and smallness?
JEANNE: YOU are very kind, Monsieur!
PAUL [moves away from Jeanne; regards her attentively; aside]: I must find something to give her. She is charming! Aside from her simple garb, there is something about her — I know not what — of distinction, purity, refinement, that I never have seen equalled. And the modest grace of her attitude, the brightness of her glance! Can she be — why not? [Aloud] Jeannette!
JEANNE: Monsieur!
PAUL: YOU must be weary of your present lot. Have you never had thoughts and ideas that surprised yourself? Have you never heard in your inmost soul something that whispered to you of a higher destiny? Have you not had a desire to flee — somewhere — far away?
JEANNE: I! Run away! But where? I do not know the way.
PAUL [makes gesture of annoyance; then aside]: It is my language that she does not understand. [Aloud] Tell me, when you are all by yourself in the fields, what do you think about?
JEANNE: Why — nothing, Monsieur!
PAUL: Try to remember.
JEANNE: Ah, if — ! Well, I think of the cows, — most of all of the black one, which follows me like a dog. Then I notice how the grass is growing, and count how many apples there are on the trees.
PAUL: But — at night? Of what do you dream?
JEANNE [laughs]: Dream! I don't dream. I sleep too sound.
PAUL: What books have you read?
JEANNE: I don't know how to read — when have I had time to learn? — and I cannot write either. And oh! how sorry I am that I cannot! It would be so useful to me in keeping the accounts.
PAUL [aside]: That is enough! This is the end of my fancy! She does not lack in grace and sweetness, but it would take a long time to cultivate her mind. I must give it up. [Laughs bitterly] I, who for a moment believed that — [Stands lost in thought]
JEANNE: What is the matter, Monsieur Paul? Why do you not speak to me? Just now your voice was as sweet as music. I did not understand what you said, but it pleased me.
PAUL [brusquely]: Well, well! [Calls] Dominique! I thank you, Jeannette! Later — as soon as I am able — I will show you how grateful I am for your kindness; and when you marry —
SCENE V.
(Enter Dominique)
DOMINIQUE: What do you wish, Monsieur?
PAUL [indicates Jeanne]: Say good-bye to her, for we are going away.
DOMINIQUE: TO travel again?
PAUL: Yes, we are going on a long journey.
DOMINIQUE: But, Monsieur, you seem to forget the state of our wardrobe.
PAUL [looks about anxiously]: True! [Sees a superb fur coat lying on the bed] But look! Heaven has had a hand in this! This is a warning, a command!
DOMINIQUE: What splendid fur! [Takes coat on his arm and examines it] You never told me you had such a coat. With that on your back you can laugh at the thermometer! If I only had one like it! [About to lay the coat on the bed, he perceives a second similar garment] What, another!
PAUL: It is for you! Take it!
DOMINIQUE [puts on the coat quickly, turns up the collar, and crosses his hands inside the sleeves]: I shall be warm enough in this. Ha! I look like a Russian ambassador!
PAUL [taps his foot impatiently]: Come, come, hasten! I wish to start at once, to follow my purpose until it is attained! Come!
DOMINIQUE: Oh, it won't take me long to get our things together. Just watch me! Good-bye, little sister!
JEANNE [stifling a sob]: Good-bye!
PAUL [with hat on his head and fur coat over his arm, stops at the door on hearing Jeanne sob]: Ah, she has more feeling and sensibility than I thought. Well, — of course, it is on her brother's account! [Exit Paul and Dominique.
SCENE VI.
JEANNE: They have gone, and this time I don't know where. Very far away, no doubt! I thought for a moment that he was going to offer to take me with them. But no, since he leaves me like this, he must look down upon me. It is because I am not a fine lady, brought up in the city; because I have no trailing gowns, no laces, nor cashmeres, nor jewels, because I am a stupid little peasant, and don't know how to do anything to please him! I cannot dance nor play on the piano; I have no manners and no pretty clothes! Oh, if I only had all those things! [Goes to fireplace and leans on the mantel-piece] If I had them perhaps he would love me! How shall I manage to get a pretty gown — only a pretty gown? [King of the Gnomes glides from the half open closet]
KING: Good! She begins by making a most stupid wish! All the better! It is impossible to stop it, but we can arrange matters so that we never shall be recognised! Begin!
(The scenery changes slowly in semi-darkness)
FIFTH TABLEAU. THE ISLAND OF THE TOILETTE.
Scene: At the back of the stage are small hillocks, covered with strips of different-coloured cloths. At R. beside a stream composed of milk of almonds, grow, like reeds, slender sticks of cosmetic. A little in front of these a fountain of eau de Cologne springs out of a rock made of toilette rouge. In the centre of the stage is a grass-plot, with spangles on the blades of grass; here and there are bushes made of brushes, and stones are represented by cakes of soap of various colours. A tree resembling a tamarisk stands L. with clusters of marabout feathers growing on it; another tree, shaped like a palm, bears open fans. There is a small patch of razors; a little in the rear is a tree full of mirrors, another of wigs, a third of powder-puffs, a fourth of combs, and costumes of different styles hang from the branches of larger trees. Bright-coloured flies dart about, and fly in the faces of the women.
Jeanne [discovered in the same attitude as when the last scene changed; her head is bent, and one arm rests upon the rock of rouge. After a moment’s silence she lifts her head and looks around with amazement]: Why, how pretty it is here! And how sweet the air is! It smells exactly like eau de Cologne! Where does it come from? From this fountain, I do believe! How nice it would be to wash my hands in it! [Plunges in her arms up to the elbows] One isn't afraid of spilling this. I will put some on my head, too. [Sprinkles some drops on the top of her head; they change to diamonds without her perceiving it. She washes her face, and as she leans over the fountain, a branch from the comb-bearing tree behind her bends down and gently arranges her hair in a graceful knot. She rises, surprised, with her hand on her right cheek] Who touched my head? Go on, go on! I liked that very much! [The powder-puff tree lowers one of its branches and lightly powders her face] Oh, how soft and nice that feels! [Turns her left cheek to the puff] Again
! Oh, but that tickles! That's enough; it makes me want to laugh! Ha! ha! ha! [The branch returns to its position] Is that done? I thank you very much! [Jumps up] What! No one here? [Looks at all the strange objects about her and walks to and fro] What a queer country this is! Combs growing on trees! And there's a tree with wigs on it! And just see all those clothes and things on the ground, lying there like dead leaves! Oh, what pretty grass, with great dew-drops! No, they are silver spangles! [Sees herself in one of the mirrors hanging on the tree] And there — that is I! With diamonds in my hair! I shine like the sun! [Her gown suddenly loosens itself and flies away in the air] The wind! Ah! [Cries out in terror at seeing herself in chemise and petticoat; crosses her hands on her breast] What is going to happen? I am ashamed! [A band of drapery wound around one of the hillocks in the rear, now undulates towards Jeanne and drapes itself around her in a sort of tunic] Well, well! I am all dressed now! [A tree full of bracelets catches her by the arm] What am I caught upon? What holds me? Ah! let me — [Draws a bracelet off the tree and clasps it on her arm] How well that looks against my skin! [A tree like a mountain ash drops a coral necklace around her neck] What is this? A necklace! Oh, how pretty I look! How happy I am! I love myself! I should like to kiss myself! But of course this is only a dream. Such things cannot possibly happen. I shall wake up in a minute. But where am I really? What country is this?
CHORUS [without]:
Tis the country of toilettes,
'Tis the land of gay coquettes;
Little packets,
Little rackets!
With us, to charm is all our duty;
E'en the ugly seek for beauty!
JEANNE: I do not comprehend!
CHORUS [without]:
Tis the land of La Toilette! We triumph, and we never fret! All is sweet; All is neat; Our perfumes are of violet; Our sighings do not mean regret!
(Noise of tambourines, flutes, and Chinese music heard)
JEANNE [goes up stage and looks off]: What a crowd of people! CHORUS [without]:
Silence! Silence! Silence! Make way for the King's advance) Like the stars, to which we sing, Comes Couturin, our Fashion's king; The only being here who can Rule th' inconstant taste of man!
JEANNE: Oh, they are coming this way! I am afraid! Where shall I hide? [Runs behind the tree of mirrors]
SCENE II.
(Enter King Couturin, Queen Couturine, Graisse-d'Ours, Prime Minister, and Ladies and Gentlemen of the Court. The King and Queen are dressed in the latest fashion, greatly exaggerated. Graisse-d'Ours wears a round jacket and a large apron; he has a bristling beard and an uncouth aspect. All the personages of the Court wear emblems of their various Occupations. The King, carried by four men, is seated on a sort of portable throne, which has plumes waving over his head and mirrors set in the back. The Queen occupies a lower seat, R. The Prime Minister has a similar seat, L. The porters gently lower the King's throne to the ground, C.)
KING C.: That will do! Hold! Now, since we are installed in the place three times chosen for royal conclaves, with our dear spouse, the lovely Couturine —
QUEEN C. [looks fondly at King; takes his hand and kisses it]: Always my tender Couturin!
KING C.: And having at our left our Prime Minister, the indispensable Graisse-d'Ours —
GRAISSE-D'OURS: Your Majesty is too kind!
KING C.: And near us also the high dignitaries of our crown: the arch-tailor, the arch-bootmaker, the Prince of Coldcream, the Duke of Caoutchouc, and others —
DIGNITARIES [bow low]: At your service, O sovereign!
KING C.: Also the ladies of our Court, of which they are the brightest ornament —
LADIES: Ah, delicious!
KING C.: And having behind us the imbecile people —
CROWD: Long live the King!
KING C.: It is necessary, according to custom, that we now proceed to establish the modes for the season.
ALL [gesticulate excitedly]: Yes, yes! Tell us! What colours? How many yards?
KING C.: One moment! First, I must recall to you the great principles.
GRAISSE-D'OURS: Recall them!
KING C. [to the ladies]: It is a well-recognised truth, my doves, that naturally you are all hideous!
LADIES [scandalised]: Ah! Oh! How abominable!
KING C.: Certainly, — very ugly indeed! You do not doubt for a moment, I hope, the superiority of the artificial over the real. It is art alone, my goddesses, that furnishes you with all your charms. Oh, fear nothing! I am discreet! But you know it is the robe we fall in love with, not the woman; the shoe, not the foot; and if you do not possess silks, laces, velvets, patchouli, kid gloves, sparkling jewels, and colours wherewith to paint your faces, even the wild savages would have nothing to do with you, since they like their women tattooed! [Sits]
LADIES: That is a little hard! Rather too severe!
GRAISSE-D'OURS [rises]: Besides, dress is a sign of chastity, forms a part of virtue, and may even be considered virtue itself. [Sits]
KING C. [rises]: Then, the more extraordinary a costume is — that is, the more unnatural, inconvenient, and ugly — the more striking and desirable it is! [Sits]
GRAISSE-D'OURS [rises]: And distingué besides. [Sits]
ALL: Ah, distingué! That is the principal thing!
KING C.: Tis well! Now to work!
ALL: We will look! We will search! [Silence; then a sound of broken glass]
KING C.: What is that? [Looks off R.; makes a sign to an Official to seek the cause of the noise. Exit Official] Ah, the mirror-tree is broken! The mirrors were too ripe, no doubt, and some marauder has shaken the tree.
OFFICIAL [re-enters]: We found behind the mirror-tree a strange monster.
KING C.: A monster?
OFFICIAL: Yes, your Majesty, a being green and unfashionable in appearance.
KING C.: Bring her hither! ALL: What courage!
SCENE III.
(Enter Jeanne, wearing green empire gloves reaching to her elbows and lying in deep wrinkles on her arms; her hair is dressed very high; she wears a yellow shawl over her tunic and carries a reticule in her hand. As she enters King Couturin utters a sharp cry and staggers back; Graisse-d'Ours supports him. The Queen, with a gesture of terror, falls upon her throne; the Ladies snatch fans off the fan-tree and hide their faces behind them. General excitement)
MEN:
Back!
Go away!
Hide yourself!
WOMEN:
What a horror!
Such boldness!
How old-fashioned!
KING C. [extends his sceptre — a stick covered with curl-papers — to command silence]: Keep cool your heads, excited by too much curling! Approach, young girl — because you have the appearance of being one, although you possess no graces. Explain yourself, and justify, if you can, the wearing of that extraordinary costume.
JEANNE: I found it lying there on the ground, by chance, and picked it up — I thought I must; and in rising I broke the mirrors —
KING C.: Never mind them — that is not the important question. [Rapidly] But to have disobeyed the laws of our empire, to have shown disregard of the cult of the shoes, the delicacy of the lingerie, and the elegance of the coiffure; to muffle yourself up in such frightful old clothes, which carry one back to the days of Corinne and the fashion of egg cameos, — all this deserves torture!
ALL: Yes! Yes! the most terrible!
KING C.: You should be condemned to wear shoes too tight, combs too hard, unlaceable corsets!
ALL: Bravo!
KING C.: To carry a work-bag!
JEANNE: Mercy!
KING C.: And to wear a turban, with bunches of feathers on it!
JEANNE: But I did not know the fashion! I was not able to follow it. Is that a crime?
KING C.: There is none greater, woman! for the fashion, mark you, is the law, fancy, tradition, and progress. It is nothing unless it governs, produces, and overthrows. Colossal idol set up by all the world, it drapes the c
radle of the newly-born and ornaments the tomb of the dead; it raises its head to heaven above all philosophies, and penetrates, with the tip of its dainty foot, to eternity itself! Take off those green gloves!
JEANNE [humbly]: I ask nothing better. I will do whatever you wish.
QUEEN C.: Ah, have pity on her, great Kingl
KING C.: Be it so! I pardon you, in consideration of your ignorance. [To the Officers] And you, — I desire you to set about attiring her in the very latest mode.
JEANNE [Jumps about joyfully]: Oh, thanks, thanks! your Majesty! What happiness! Then shall I be pretty and well dressed?
Complete Works of Gustave Flaubert Page 428