Her whole body was trembling in waves now. “Why didn’t you kill me?”
“Those women weren’t really women to me; they were objects. You were a woman, a person. My wife.”
He’d been fantasizing about murder while having sex with her. It made her stomach ache with disgust. She forced out the words, “And the shoes?”
“To keep me going between my guilty pleasures. I love having something as innocuous as a shoe on the side of the road symbolize sex and violence.”
Silas had been inside his head. It had been Ben’s thoughts and desires that had haunted him. Ben’s darkness hidden under the light he showed the world.
“Why did I start killing women, is that what you’re wondering?” he asked, mistaking the expression on her face. “You’re looking for that one incident, that one reason, aren’t you? Makes it simple that way; easier to digest. Maybe it started with the rejection I experienced as a child, being dumped on the church steps, tied to the door. Or maybe that’s why I was tied to the church. All I know is I never liked fluffy, baby chicks—I wanted to kill them. I never wanted to kiss girls—I wanted to hurt them. I learned early on that taking what I wanted, or hurting things I didn’t like, wasn’t acceptable, so I got sneaky about it.”
She felt weak and ravaged inside. Outside, smoke drifted past the window like phantoms. “Did the real Ben Ferguson molest you?”
“That’s when I knew I’d lost you, when you didn’t buy my story hook, line and sinker like you used to. No, he never touched me. I’d hit a dog with my bike, and he drove by and thought I was trying to save it. I went with him to the clinic and helped him. He taught me a lot about respecting animals. After that, I never hurt an animal intentionally.”
“Except for Silas’s dog. And the raccoon.”
“I wanted to hurt Silas the way he’d hurt me. I didn’t like killing his dog. Just like I didn’t enjoy killing Ben. He was a nice man who gave me a second chance. And I tried to take it, I really did. Just like with you. But he caught me at a few lies, and he wouldn’t tolerate it. He was real funny about that. I told him the kid who mowed the lawn was stealing the lawn equipment. I wanted to be the only kid in his world so he wouldn’t be tempted to replace me. I don’t think he believed me. I could feel it, that he was moving away from me. He didn’t believe what I said.” His face had transformed from the cold-steel expression to the scared kid. “I was going to lose my home and the only man who was ever like a father to me,” he whispered.
“So you killed him before he could reject you.”
He only nodded. “It was the first time I’d ever killed someone. It gave me no pleasure. It was a necessary killing.” He blinked in surprise when she pulled the gun out of her bag.
“Take me to Silas. Now.”
Once he was over the surprise, he took on a casual pose. “Katie, you’re not going to shoot me.”
She cocked the hammer. “I will.” All those times Silas had warned her to be ready to shoot someone she knew…how right he’d been. She touched the gold cross he’d given her when he’d warned her about the killer: It’s someone you know.
Ben moved forward to take the gun. She could do this. Squeeze the trigger, hit the wall behind him in warning. Instead, the gun merely clicked. Oh, God, she’d taken the bullets out. He grabbed the gun and tossed it on the bed.
“Katie, I loved you, I really did. You are the only person I ever loved besides the doc.”
She realized something Gary had said. “Where’s Bertrice? You gave her a ride this afternoon.”
“And good thing, too. That’s how I spotted Silas’s vehicle near the barn. Even though I leave no evidence behind, I couldn’t take the chance that he would figure it out. You know, every time I’m around him, he gives me the creeps.”
Because he’s in your head, she wanted to say, but kept it to herself. She tried hard not to think about Silas. “Where’s Bertrice?”
“The fire’s moving in, and it’s time to move on anyway.” He surveyed her. “If I let you go, would you tell on me?”
“No one would believe me, not since you’ve turned everyone against me,” she said, angry that he was giving her hope.
He smiled at her. “All because I loved you, Katie. You can’t blame a man for wanting his wife to himself.”
“As a matter of fact, I can.”
“Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you. Except the killings. Those were just for me. I’m taking the van and heading on down the road.” He tenderly touched her face, but she flinched away from him. “As I was saying, not that anyone will believe you, but you have a choice. See, I’m giving you that choice you say you never had, because I’m such a nice guy.” He waited for her to negate that, but she wasn’t fool enough to incite him. “You could get to town and try to convince someone that I’m the terrible bogey man. They might track me down, they might not. Or you could go to the barn and try to save Silas.”
She sucked in a gasp of air. “He’s alive?”
“If he hasn’t bled to death.” He chuckled softly. “He’s not going anywhere fast. And the fire’s moving in from that direction. So, that’s your choice: try to stop a killer or save your boyfriend.” He pinched her chin hard. “How selfish are you going to be, Katie girl?”
She was frozen as he casually walked to the door. He turned around, looked at her. “I would never hurt you. You believe me, don’t you?”
He had hurt her, and no, she didn’t believe him. She wanted to play along with him, nod her head, but she couldn’t move. He was pleased by her response—or lack of it—anyway. He smiled and walked out the door.
She ran to the dresser drawer to find the bullets she’d removed. They weren’t there. She would have shot him, she was sure of it. Because she remembered something from Silas’s books: serial killers don’t stop killing unless they’re caught or they die.
She ran to the front room in time to see Ben pulling out of the driveway in their van. She ran back to the kitchen and checked on Gary. He was alive, but still unconscious. She grabbed for the phone, but somehow expected only silence. He’d probably cut the lines when he’d returned. Ben wasn’t a fool. Which meant…
She ran outside to find Gary’s Explorer. Gary had parked on the side of the house so she wouldn’t see it when she returned from Silas’s. The hood was up, and inside, wires were dangling loose. The radio was smashed. She tried to start the vehicle anyway, but knew it wouldn’t start.
She glanced down the driveway. Ben was right; she might be able to run to town and find someone to alert, but they’d never believe her. Tate and Harold had virtually ignored her earlier. She glanced behind the house, where smoke drifted through the woods. Silas was there; she was pretty sure she could remember how to reach the barn, though it could take more than an hour to get there. She probably had only a couple more hours of daylight left.
Ben could be lying about him being alive. It was a possibility she couldn’t ignore.
She already knew she’d have to take that chance.
CHAPTER 22
The smoke was disorienting, but Katie managed to find the barn. She heard sirens in the distance and the whir of a helicopter over the trees’ canopy. Help was right there, and yet so far away.
And Ben, where was he? Long gone or waiting somewhere for her? Playing his games?
Her heart hurt from fear, and her chest hurt from breathing smoke. She had prayed the entire way, and now she’d find out if those prayers had paid off. The door was padlocked. She called Silas’s name, hoping he was well enough to respond. No answer. She walked around the barn, telling herself she was looking for other ways inside and not for Ben. When she came around to the door again, she noticed it was only repositioned to look as though it were still intact. It had already been broken in.
She shoved the door open and peered into the gloominess. The first thing she saw once her eyes adjusted was the bed Ben had mentioned. Silas wasn’t lying on it cuffed to the railing. She searched the back corners of the barn,
and then turned toward the front portion. What she saw shattered her heart…and caved in her insides.
Silas was nailed to the wall.
A guttural sound escaped her mouth. She fought the urge to turn away. There was a spike driven through the palm of each hand, just like Jesus Christ’s crucifixion. Blood oozed from a gash on the side of his head, another eerie resemblance. He was lying on the floor, his head leaning against the wall. She rushed forward and dropped to her knees at his side.
“Silas, please don’t be dead. You can’t die yet, we’ve got too much unfinished business between us.” His pulse was a lot thinner than Gary’s had been. Ben had probably hit Silas with the pipe too, and then nailed him to the wall after he was unconscious. Thank God for that last part anyway.
After a desperate search, she found an old hunting knife tucked beneath the springs on the bed frame. “Oh, God, oh, God,” she said, standing in front of him contemplating her next task. There wasn’t time to be squeamish or gentle about it, though. She knelt before him and pried the stake out of one hand, then the other. Blood had dripped down his arms. Having them nailed at head level may have saved him from bleeding to death. She kept talking through the whole ordeal. She took off her white blouse and ripped the sleeves off with help from the dull edge of the knife. She wrapped each hand in one sleeve and put her blouse back on.
“Silas, hang in there. You were right, so right, and I was such an idiot. With all your charts, you must have figured out where he put the women he’d taken. I know everything now. I was married to a killer. And now I’m letting him get away, but I had no choice.”
Her voice got louder and louder as she worked, and when he finally slumped over, she sounded nearly hysterical. There wasn’t time for hysterics, though. She gently tapped his face and called his name.
Slowly his eyes opened, though they weren’t focused at all. His pupils were dilated. No way was she getting him to walk back to her house. Wait! His vehicle had to be there somewhere. Unless Ben sabotaged it as he had Gary’s Explorer.
“You think about coming around while I find your car. I’ll be right back.”
She stopped at the door. What if Ben was waiting until she left Silas for a minute? He liked letting them think he was going to let them go. She couldn’t forget that, not ever.
She turned back and found him out cold again. “Silas! No time to sleep now! Dammit, come back to me!” She kissed his slack lips hard. “We’ve got to go, and no way can I carry you out of here.”
She waited some of the longest moments in her life until his eyes slowly opened again. They still weren’t focused. He started to lift his hands to see them, but she held his wrists down. Blood seeped through the white cotton bandages. “It’s not pretty, believe me. Keep your hands pressed together. We’ve got to get you and Gary to a hospital. Silas, please get up. I need you, more than I’ve ever needed you. Help me get you out of here.”
He was sitting up against the wall where he’d been nailed. She wrapped her arms around him and tried to stand up. He put his hands on her back, but jerked away in pain.
“Let me try this without your help,” she said, then grunted with exertion. He braced his shoulder against the wall and shakily got to his feet. She kept her arms around him for a moment, relishing the feel of him alive and warm next to her. A moment was all she could spare. “Let’s go,” she said and guided him toward the door.
The smoke rolled through the trees now, obliterating the forest in the distance. She swore she could hear the crackle of flames, though she couldn’t see any through the smoke. He coughed with the first inhalation of smoke. Her lungs were almost used to the burning feeling, but each breath she took was getting shallower, more painful. His balance was off, too, making them sway as they headed toward the red gate. It was closed, and just beyond it sat the Navigator.
When they reached the car, she helped him lean his forearms against the hood and yanked open the door. Only it didn’t open because it was locked. At least the hood was still closed and the tires were intact. Ben hadn’t bothered to tamper with the car because he hadn’t expected Silas to get out of that barn. The thought shivered through her as sinister as the smoke around her.
“Stay here for a second. I’ll be right back.”
She could barely see the woods on the other side of the road for the smoke. She ventured to the highway to see if another car was anywhere nearby to help her. She doubted if the road was even open with the smoke cutting down the visibility. Returning to Silas, she hoped against hope the keys were somewhere in his pockets. Finding them sent a rush of relief through her. She helped him into the passenger seat and reclined it before closing him in. He looked the color of concrete.
She started the car and backed out onto the highway. At least they were heading away from the fires as they returned to her house. No sign of Ben there, either. She told Silas to stay put and ran inside to get Gary. He was groggily trying to get to his feet.
“What happened?” he asked in a slurred voice, rubbing the back of his head. His fingers came away sticky with blood.
“Ben hit you with a pipe. Come on, I’ve got to get you and Silas to the hospital.”
“Ben? Silas?” he said, letting her lead him to the Navigator.
“It’s a long story.”
She helped Gary into the back seat and headed toward Gray, the nearest major hospital. Silas was looking at her in a glassy kind of way as she drove. She reached over and touched his arm before returning to the task of driving like hell.
Katie had, of course, been questioned when she brought in two victims with concussions and the injuries Silas had sustained. Sheriff Tate had been contacted and had asked that Katie remain at the hospital until he could break free and find out what—his words—in tarnation was going on. She’d tried to tell the Gray police officer about Ben, but whatever Tate had told him had the man giving her questionable looks.
The adrenaline had long since drained away to leave her as limp as wet toilet paper by the time she had been looked at. All she wanted to do was collapse in the waiting area. Instead, she hauled herself to the pay phone and called Bertrice. Katie’s first prayer was that Bertrice was there, safe and sound. The next prayer was that her mother wouldn’t answer.
It rang several times, long enough for Katie to think about whether she wanted to leave a message if a machine answered. Finally, it was Bertrice’s breathless voice that said, “Hello?”
Katie slumped against the phone booth partition. “Thank God you’re okay!” Tears of relief slipped into her voice. “I’d heard that Ben gave you a ride home, and Ben’s a—I don’t want to get into that right now. I just wanted to make sure you were all right.”
“Katie, is that you?”
“Yes, it’s me. I know you don’t like me—”
“Katie, I like you. I was just pissed about you telling Mom about my belly-button ring. I’m sorry I got so mad and quit.”
“I didn’t tell your mom about that ring; Ben did. Ask your mom. He probably told her I asked him to call, but I never even mentioned it to him. He must have overheard us. Anyway, that’s not why I’m calling. I wanted to make sure you were all right.”
“I’m fine. We’re getting the house ready in case the fires move in. Did you hear, they’re tracking a big storm system that’s heading this way. They’re holding off on the evacuations for now. Do you and Ben need help getting your place ready, just in case? We’re almost done here.”
“Don’t go near Ben! No matter what, if you see him, don’t go near him.” Katie couldn’t keep the fear from her voice.
“Katie, you’re scaring me. I mean, Ben was acting weird. He was taking me home, right, and he saw Silas’s truck parked on the side of the road and he went, like, nuts. He got stopped at the intersection because of the fire, and he told me to get out of the car, that the cops would get me home. Then he took off.”
“All you need to know right now is he can’t be trusted.”
“Oh, my God, Katie
, you’re calling from the hospital in Gray. What’s going on? Are you all right?”
She must have caller ID. “Silas and Gary are both here. I think they’ll be all right, though Silas was hurt pretty bad. I”—she turned to the orderly who had just called her name—“I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later.”
They let her in to see Silas. He was still in the emergency area. Her knees went weak at the sight of him lying in bed. A gauze bandage was wrapped around his head, and his hands were bandaged. At least his eyes were a little more focused now and they followed her into the curtained room.
“You all right?” he asked in a slightly slurred voice.
“You’ve got to be kidding. You’re the one in the emergency room and you’re asking me if I’m all right?” She leaned against the side of the bed and pushed back a strand of his hair. “Can’t you tell I’m all right now?”
He shook his head, then closed his eyes. “Still dizzy when I do that.” He opened his eyes again. “I can’t feel anything. It’s gone. Maybe the blow to my head dislodged something. Tell me what happened. I was in that barn and everything went dark. I barely remember you getting me out of there.”
He looked even paler after she was finished telling him everything. “I should have figured it out before it was too late,” he said.
“You were doing everything you could.”
“You were living with a serial killer for God’s sake! You could have been killed.”
“Not while we were living together. Those women were only objects to him. He saw me as a person.”
He closed his eyes for a few minutes. Just when she thought he was asleep, he mumbled, “You let him get away.”
“What did you say?”
His voice was so faint, she had to lean closer to hear him. “You should have left me and called someone to catch him. Now he’ll keep killing. And if I can’t feel him anymore, I won’t be able to find him again.”
Her fingers tightened on the edge of the bed. “If you’ll recall, I let him go to save your life. You’re saying that was wrong?”
Unforgivable (Romantic Suspense) Page 32