OF MONSTERS PAST
Silence filled the room like a void. Caddie was still standing at the foot of my bed, still making the doll wave at me. Her dark eyes watched me, unblinking, but she made no attempt to move closer.
A thousand thoughts crashed together in my head. I reached out and plucked one at random.
‘How did you get here?’
She didn’t answer.
‘What are you doing here?’ I demanded – more loudly, but not loud enough to wake anyone up.
‘She doesn’t want to play with us any more,’ the girl spoke softly.
I hesitated, trying to figure out the meaning behind her words, if there even was one.
Caddie looked just like she’d done four days ago. The smear of lipstick was still a red blur across her lips. Her face was still a rainbow of badly applied eyeshadow and blusher and whatever other names they give to make-up. Beneath it all her skin was still as pale as bone, and her lifeless stare still gave me the willies.
‘Who doesn’t—’
‘Oh, you remembered,’ she said. Her face broke into a wide smile.
Again I paused. ‘Remembered what?’
‘She won’t play any more,’ Caddie said, apparently fighting back tears. ‘We were having so much fun, but then she just wouldn’t play.’
Confusion had taken over from terror now. I had no idea what the girl was talking about, although there was something about her words that seemed familiar.
‘S’not fair,’ she muttered. ‘Every time I find a new friend to play with they get broken.’
Broken. A circuit connected in my brain and I realised why I felt like I’d heard this before. I had heard it before. Caddie was repeating everything she’d said to me in the school canteen – the first time I’d seen her here in the real world. I remembered Mrs Milton, my head teacher, lying on the floor. Sobbing and babbling. And broken.
I ran back over the meeting in my head. If I could remember what she said next then I could prove to myself I was right. What was it she’d said? What had I said? Something about Billy.
‘Not telling,’ she spoke.
Of course, that was it.
‘I told you, silly, I’m not telling,’ I blurted out, as quickly as I could. She started to speak before I was half finished.
‘I told you, silly,’ she giggled. ‘I’m not telling!’
It was as if I was looking at a recording. Every word, every inflection of her voice was exactly like it had been in the school. Any second now she’d ask me if I wanted—
‘Tea?’ she enquired.
And now I thought about it I realised it wasn’t just Caddie. When Mr Mumbles appeared on Christmas Day I’d first seen him in front of the living-room window. He’d stood there, hat pulled down, coat swishing in the breeze, beady eyes boring holes in mine.
He’d looked exactly the same when I saw him again tonight. The same stance in the same position in the same room. It was as if my encounters with both him and Caddie were being somehow replayed or re-enacted.
I detached myself from the corner of the room and cautiously moved towards the bed. Caddie’s eyes followed me, but she made no other movement. She was still talking – telling me I’d get a cake if I was extra good – but I was no longer really listening.
The bedsprings squeaked when I stepped up on top of the mattress. It was impossible to walk around the bed without having to go through Caddie and her doll, but I could go over it and reach the door without having to pass too close to them.
I thudded down on to the other side of the bed. The closed bedroom door was just a few steps away now. My eyes remained locked with Caddie’s as I backed towards it, my hand searching for the handle.
‘Raggy Maggie likes sugar, don’t you, Raggy Maggie?’ was all she said as I slipped out on to the upstairs landing.
The door to Ameena’s room was directly across from mine. It used to be where Nan slept when she lived with us, but – apart from Christmas Day – it had been empty ever since she’d gone into the old folks’ home a few years back.
The door wasn’t fully shut. I nudged it open and took a backwards step inside. My eyes were still on Caddie. I didn’t want to let her out of my sight for a second, in case she pulled a vanishing act like Mr Mumbles had.
I could hear Ameena’s breathing, soft and slow. She was asleep. Not for long.
‘Ameena,’ I hissed into the gloom. ‘Ameena, wake up.’
I heard her gasp quietly. The bed gave a sharp creak as she sat quickly upright. ‘What?’ she said, more loudly than I’d have liked. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Come here, quick.’
‘What is it?’
‘Just come and look!’ I hissed, giving her an imploring look. She muttered faintly beneath her breath as she threw off her covers and came to join me by the door.
She needn’t have bothered. The spot where Caddie had been standing was empty. I cursed myself for glancing away.
‘Gone,’ I said. ‘She’s gone.’
‘Who’s gone?’
‘Caddie.’
‘Yeah, four days ago,’ Ameena said.
I shook my head. ‘No, not four days ago. Now. A second ago.’
I marched across the landing and into my room. Empty. Ameena sauntered in behind me.
‘You were probably just dreaming.’
‘I’m telling you she was here,’ I said, pointing to the foot of my bed. ‘Standing right there.’
Ameena opened my wardrobe door and peeked inside. ‘Not in there,’ she said, closing it again with a click. ‘You sure you weren’t dreaming, kiddo?’
I flopped down into a sitting position on my bed. First Mr Mumbles and then Caddie. What was happening to me?
‘I saw her,’ I said, my voice coming out as a quiet croak. ‘I saw her as clearly as I’m seeing you.’
‘Maybe you just imagined—’
‘No,’ I snapped, ‘she was here.’
‘You didn’t let me finish. I’m not saying she wasn’t here, I’m saying maybe you imagined it.’
I looked up at her and blinked, even more confused than I had been. ‘How do you mean?’
‘Remember in the garage?’ she said. ‘When we fought Mr Mumbles. You told me you thought about a light coming on, and what happened?’
‘A light came on,’ I frowned, ‘but—’
‘And you thought how handy it would be to have a weapon, didn’t you? And then…’
‘I found the axe.’
‘Exactly,’ she nodded. ‘So what happened downstairs? Just before you saw Mr Mumbles.’
‘I dropped a glass,’ I told her.
‘And?’
I hesitated, having already realised the road this conversation was taking me down. ‘And I remembered him coming through the window.’
‘And I’ll bet just before your other guest turned up you’d been thinking about her too.’
I looked from Ameena to the spot where Caddie had been standing. Though I didn’t realise it, I must’ve nodded.
‘Thought so,’ Ameena said. She looked pleased with herself. I felt like she’d just kicked me in the stomach.
‘So, what,’ I began, ‘every time I remember them they’re going to come back, is that it? Every time I think about what happened they’re going to come leaping out of the shadows?’
‘There’s a simple solution.’
‘What’s that?’
‘Don’t think about them.’
Easy for you to say, I thought, but I didn’t say it out loud. I looked down at the floor. Was this it? Was I doomed to a life of running from ghosts of monsters past? I had to know. One way or another I had to find out for sure.
‘You might be right,’ I nodded, standing up.
‘Of course I’m right. I’m always right.’
‘But let’s do a test,’ I suggested.
Ameena’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. ‘What kind of test?’
‘I’ll think about one of them and see if I can make them appear.’
/>
Ameena didn’t say anything for a moment. I saw her look over at my bedside alarm. The LED display told her it was well before five. She sighed as she realised she wouldn’t be getting back to bed any time soon. ‘OK,’ she nodded. ‘Let’s give it a try.’
‘Close the door,’ I instructed. I bounced up and down on the spot a few times, taking four or five big, deep breaths.
‘Ready?’ Ameena asked.
I stopped bouncing and nodded. ‘Ready.’
We stood there for a long time, neither one of us saying anything, until Ameena eventually broke the silence.
‘You started yet?’
I winced. ‘I don’t know which one to think about.’
‘Good grief,’ she muttered, shaking her head. ‘Think about whatever one scared you the least. I don’t want you freaking out on me if you do make them appear.’
‘Right,’ I said. ‘Good idea.’
I closed my eyes. It was a close-run thing, but I found Mr Mumbles marginally less scary than Caddie, even though it probably should have been the other way around. There was a vague familiarity to Mr Mumbles that Caddie didn’t have, and I think that’s why he didn’t terrify me quite as much as the girl with the doll did.
Lost in the blackness behind my eyes, I tried to picture my old imaginary friend. It wasn’t hard. He had a face that wasn’t easy to forget, and I’d seen it up close so many times it was burned into my memory for ever.
Almost straight away, Mr Mumbles stumbled from the fog inside my head, arms outstretched, hands clawing at thin air. Instinctively I opened my eyes and pulled away, although there was nothing to pull away from. Only Ameena and I were there in the room.
‘What happened?’ she asked.
‘I thought about him,’ I said. ‘I could picture him coming at me.’
‘And what about now?’ she asked, casting her eyes around the room. ‘Can you see him now?’
I shook my head. ‘Maybe I should try again.’
‘If you like,’ Ameena nodded, before she gave a yawn so big it threatened to swallow her own head.
‘Let’s try in the morning,’ I suggested, taking the hint. ‘It’s late. Or early, depending on how you look at it.’
‘Good call. You be OK?’
‘Course,’ I said with a smile, as I guided her towards the door. ‘I’ll be absolutely… Wait. Did you hear something?’
We stood listening to the silence.
‘Nope.’
I hesitated, then reached for the door. For a moment there I’d thought I heard…
‘Footsteps,’ I whispered. ‘Listen.’
We leaned closer to the door. Ameena stared down towards the end of her nose, the way she always did when she was listening hard.
Thup. The sound of the footstep on the hallway carpet was almost too soft for us to hear. Almost.
Ameena’s eyes met mine. She gave a brief nod and we both stepped back from the door.
Thup.
‘Now do you believe me?’ I whispered as I looked around for something to use as a weapon. The only thing close to hand was a pillow, and I couldn’t see that being a lot of help.
Thup. The footsteps stopped right outside the bedroom door. Ameena and I both took another step away.
I narrowed my eyes and gave the power sleeping inside me a nudge. At once I felt the familiar tingling sensation creep across my scalp; saw the flashes of blue and white sparks across my vision. When Mr Mumbles stepped through the doorway he’d be stepping straight into a world of pain.
Standing shoulder to shoulder, I felt Ameena tense as the handle of the door slowly began to turn. The dull metal gave the faintest of creaks as it was pushed all the way down.
The electricity buzzed through my skull. I raised my hands, not yet sure what I was going to do to Mr Mumbles, but certain it was going to be something nasty.
The door edged open and a head appeared through the gap. Mum looked half asleep. She also looked angry.
‘What’s going on?’ she demanded, pushing the door the rest of the way open. ‘It’s the middle of the night.’
‘Mum,’ I breathed, feeling the tingling in my head subside. ‘It’s only you. We thought it was—’
He stepped out behind her without a sound, raising the axe before I could grasp what was happening. Everything seemed to lurch into jerky slow motion as Mr Mumbles swung his arm round in a wide arc. I heard Ameena give a yelp, and watched, helpless, as the blade of the axe sliced through the air.
And straight towards Mum’s neck.
Chapter Three
A GOODBYE
I have no memory of moving. I don’t remember hurling myself at Mr Mumbles, or how I managed to reach him before the axe could find its target.
All I remember is my shoulder hitting him hard in the chest and the sound of the air leaving his body in one short sharp breath.
We tumbled, a flailing ball of arms and legs, through the door into Ameena’s room. He was laughing before we hit the floor, that low, sickening cackle I’d heard too many times before.
My fist glanced off his chin. He didn’t flinch. Kept on laughing. I brought the sparks rushing across my head. Pictured my muscles bulging. Faster. Stronger.
Bam. The next punch twisted his head around. That shut him up, but I hit him again anyway, across his crooked nose this time. It split with a crack, spraying thick black blood on to the carpet.
This time I was getting rid of him for good. There would be no coming back from what I was about to do to him.
How many times did he try to strangle me at Christmas? Four? Five? I’d lost count of how often I’d felt his hands around my throat. Now it was my turn. My fingers wrapped around his windpipe and I pushed down with all my weight. His eyes bulged and his grey skin took on a purple hue as I choked whatever passed for life out of him.
I heard a sound on the carpet right behind me. Caddie, I thought, releasing my grip and twisting at the waist. The lightning zapped through my brain before I knew what was happening. Mum was lifted off her feet and driven backwards into the wall. It shook as she slammed against it, hard enough to send some of Nan’s old ornaments toppling from their shelves on the other side of the room.
I was on my feet at once, Mr Mumbles forgotten. Ameena was at Mum’s side before I was, kneeling down, checking she was OK. Mum groaned and edged herself into a seated position against the wall. Her face was contorted in pain, but there was something else there in her eyes when she looked at me. Something I’d never seen before.
Fear.
‘Mum, are you all right? I’m sorry,’ I spluttered. ‘I didn’t know it was you. I thought…’ My words wilted under her gaze. ‘You saw him, right? You saw him?’
She nodded, but her eyes didn’t leave mine, and the expression behind them didn’t change.
‘He’s gone,’ Ameena said, standing up and searching the room. ‘Where did he go?’
We were right by the door. There was no way he could have got out that way, but Ameena ventured on to the landing to check anyway. She returned a second later and gave a shrug.
‘Disappeared,’ I said. ‘Like before.’
‘You were going to kill him,’ Mum breathed.
‘I had to,’ I told her. ‘He was going to kill you.’
Mum’s eyes searched my face, as if seeing it for the first time. ‘But the way you flew at him. The way you were hitting him…’ Her eyes went moist and she looked down at my hands. Mr Mumbles’ blood still stained my knuckles.
‘You were going mental,’ Ameena said. I shot her a glare, but she fired it straight back. ‘We were shouting at you to stop. Didn’t you hear us?’
I nodded unconvincingly. I hadn’t heard a thing.
Mum winced as she tried to stand. Ameena and I both held out a hand to help her up. She looked briefly at mine, then took Ameena’s.
‘What’s the problem?’ I asked, more aggressively than I meant to. ‘I had to do it. I had to stop him. Don’t you get that?’
‘Downstairs,
’ Mum said, placing her hands on her lower back and giving her spine a stretch. ‘You and I need a little talk.’
‘But, Mum—’
‘Downstairs, Kyle,’ Mum said, not angry but sad, which was worse. ‘It wasn’t a request.’
I sat in the kitchen, listening to the cheeping of the birds outside, and the distant rumblings of the first of the early-morning traffic. Mum’s ‘little talk’ had become a long discussion, and although it was still mostly dark outside, the clock on the wall told me it was almost seven.
The hot chocolate Mum had made an hour ago had gone cold. It sat in a mug on the table in front of me, untouched. I was too stunned to drink any of it. Too shocked by what Mum was suggesting to do anything but fight back the tears that were building behind my eyes.
‘It’s for the best,’ Mum said. My gaze was lowered to the table. I could see her hand resting on top of mine, but I couldn’t feel it.
It’s for the best. She’d said those words nine times during our two-hour conversation. Only It won’t be for long challenged it for the coveted title of Most Overused Phrase. They had been neck and neck almost the whole way through, but this last instance had pushed It’s for the best into a nine-eight lead. It was nail-biting stuff, and concentrating on the game was probably the only thing that was stopping me from crying.
‘I’m sorry, Mum, it was an accident,’ I said croakily, raising my eyes to meet hers. ‘Don’t do this, please.’
‘I promise, sweetheart, it won’t be for long,’ smiled Mum weakly.
Nine all.
‘It won’t happen again, I swear.’ ‘It’s not that you hurt me. That’s not what I’m worried about,’ she said. ‘I’m worried about you. And Ameena. And… and everyone. If you’ve started making those… those things come back, then no one’s safe. No one.’
Part of me knew she was right. If I was somehow making the enemies I’d faced return, it would be dangerous for anyone to be around me.
Another part of me was even more worried, though. Mr Mumbles was dead. Caddie was dead. There shouldn’t have been anything left of them to come back.
Could it be that by picturing them so vividly I was somehow creating them? Was my imagination bringing them to life? It sounded impossible, but everything I’d been through in the past few weeks had made me take a long hard look at my definition of “impossible”.
The Crowmaster Page 2