Since then I had been a jumbled mess and even considered canceling my dinner date with Matt. I wasn’t really in the right state of mind to see anyone or make a decent decision. In the end, however, I decided against canceling on him since I hadn’t been very fair to him recently. I had no intention of having sex with him, but I needed to talk to him and see how I felt around him.
When the time came to go, I dressed quickly and headed down to the lobby of my building, where I knew he would be waiting to pick me up.
12
Chapter Twelve
Katie
I spent the next few months in a whirlwind of romance and blissful happiness. I was in love and couldn’t believe just how lucky I was. Ever since I returned from Paris, I had been by Matt’s side—in fact, I never wanted to leave that side for a minute. After the crushing blow of Ben’s refusal to commit, I hadn’t had any expectations going into that dinner with Matt, but that date had been the beginning of a wonderful romance.
Though it had taken a little while for my heart to settle after my roller coaster of a trip to Paris, once I had decided I was all in with Matt, I had fallen hard. It wasn’t difficult to see why—he was kind and generous, and most importantly, he adored me. I loved him wholeheartedly, and I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Every now and then our sex life left a little to be desired, but our emotional connection more than made up for it. He would do anything for me, and that was what I had been looking for my whole life.
It wasn’t just the whirlwind romance that had changed my life over the course of the past few months. My celebrity clientele had quadrupled since the pop star attended the awards show in her dress. The pop star herself had put in more orders not just for evening wear, but casual attire as well. Her endorsement of my company had skyrocketed business for me. I could still remember when I saw one of my sundresses in a magazine being worn by a socialite while vacationing in Europe. It had been the best feeling in the world, and I had almost died with excitement when I saw it. I tore the page out of the magazine and framed it—I was a geek like that.
With my company firmly in business and growing every day, I was able to focus more on my relationship with Matt. We had gone to the Hamptons to vacation rather frequently, and I had even been introduced to his parents while there. It hadn’t been nerve-wracking at all; I felt completely comfortable and at ease with them, just as I did with Matt.
When I first started to date Matt more seriously, I made the decision not to tell him about Ben. What I had thought was two people falling in love had turned out to be two people just having some kind of fling. While it might have taken my bruised heart a little bit of time to accept it, I knew there was no possibility of a future with Ben. What was the point in telling Matt about some fling I had before we got together? It might upset him unnecessarily, and that was the last thing that I wanted to do.
The one thing I had found shocking about Ben was that I had never heard from him after we parted at the airport. I had thought he would come to his senses and apologize, but he never called. That’s what made me finally realize that he had never been the one; he had never really wanted me in the way that I wished. Otherwise, he would have come back for me instead of allowing me to walk out of his life. Months had gone by without so much as a word from him, and it had broken my heart. Though I had my blossoming relationship with Matt to help mend my heart, I hadn’t truly realized just how much I had cared for Ben until he was really gone from my life. I had hoped he would come back, but he never did.
So the last thing I wanted to do was hurt a man that actually did care about me. If he knew that I went off to Paris with another man when we were seeing each other, he would be hurt. Even though we hadn’t talked about being exclusive at that point, I didn’t want to hurt him over my own foolishness. That’s exactly what following Ben had been—foolish.
I took a look at myself in the mirror and felt pleased with what I saw. I was wearing a sundress in a shade of blue that complemented my blonde hair. Just then, Matt walked through my bedroom door and whistled. I turned, smiling as he admired me. I had been thinking about asking Matt to move in with me, but after what happened between Ben and me, I was a little gun-shy.
“You look incredible, sweetheart. I must be the luckiest man in the world.”
“No, I’m the lucky one, Matt.” I walked over to him and kissed him fully on the mouth.
“Then I guess we’re both lucky.”
We were heading out to dinner together at an Italian restaurant that Matt had picked out. I was looking forward to getting lobster linguine and some wine. Later I would be spending the night at Matt’s place.
During dinner, we chatted about an upcoming fashion show I was putting on. It was going to be a big one for me, and there were some serious names that were going to be in attendance. My new spring line was right around the corner, and I needed the show to go off flawlessly. I may end up seeing more than one dress in the magazines this year with the way things were going. I was the newest name in fashion these days, and people were definitely talking about me.
Matt was looking at me adoringly, and I smiled back at him. “I have something to ask you, Katie.”
“Of course, what is it?”
“I’ve thought a lot about this moment. I’ve been searching for the right time, but I can’t keep waiting for the perfect moment.”
“What’s going on?”
He slid a box across the table, and I recognized it right away as a Tiffany box. I could barely breathe as I stared down at it. My heart started pounding, and I was momentarily speechless.
“Oh my god.”
He chuckled. “Are you going to open it?”
I slowly opened the box and gasped. It was a three-karat solitaire diamond on a platinum band. I couldn’t believe what I was looking at. There I had been, worried about asking him to move in with me, and he had been planning to ask me to marry him.
“From the moment I met you, Katie, I knew that I wanted to marry you. I know this may seem fast, but I have no doubt in my mind that I want you to be mine forever. Will you marry me?”
I stared at Matt, unable to fully comprehend what he was asking. Was this really happening? I didn’t know if it was too soon or not. All I wanted was to be happy, and right at that moment, Matt made me gloriously happy. So why was it that when he asked me, Ben’s face flashed through my mind? Why would I think of him instead of reveling in the moment with Matt? I didn’t want to even think about why I would think of another man when Matt asked me to marry him.
Fear struck me, but I shook it off, not wanting to think about what it might mean. Instead, I wanted to erase the thought from my mind entirely. This was everything I had ever wanted—I didn’t want to ruin it by delving into something that might not mean anything at all.
I had stared at him for so long that he smiled nervously. “You’re not going to say no, are you?”
I shook off the thoughts and smiled back at him. “Gosh, I’m sorry. You totally caught me off guard. I would love to be your wife, Matt.”
“Oh, thank god.”
“I’m so happy.” I giggled.
He leaned over and kissed me as tears streamed down my face, and he slipped the ring on my finger.
* * *
After such a romantic and inspiring dinner, we couldn’t wait to get back to Matt’s studio apartment. As soon as the door shut, we were tearing each other’s clothes off. Our mouths found one another with an intensity I hadn’t felt in a long time, and it propelled my emotions to a whole other level. His mouth found my breasts, sucking at my hard nipples, and my body arched into his as he did it. I ached between my legs and willed for him to enter me.
“Baby, please, do it now.” I didn’t care if I was still half-dressed; I needed him right then.
“I love when you talk like that.”
I kissed him again, and the feeling of his tongue in my mouth made me instantly wet. His hard body was pressed against mine. He lifted me up into his arm
s, and my legs circled his waist. He impaled me on his cock, and I moaned loudly.
“Oh Matt, that’s so good.”
“That’s all for you, baby.”
“Give it to me, Matt, oh please. That’s really good.”
He must have had insane upper-body strength to keep me in his arms to fuck me properly. He did an amazing job because I was spent as I wrapped myself around him while he was still inside me.
“I love you, Katie,” he whispered.
“I love you too, Matt,” I whispered back.
He carried me to the bed and slipped me off him, laying me down before him. I wanted him back inside me badly—I could barely stand to wait. We were engaged now, and I needed him to show me how good our life would be together. His tongue found its way into my mouth once again, and I moaned with desire.
His kisses grew more passionate, and I matched them as best I could. I didn’t know if it was the proposal or what, but I felt even more electrified than normal with our lovemaking. His hands were on my body, undressing me properly. He tossed my dress onto the floor and found my nipples with his mouth.
He went back and forth between my breasts before moving slowly down my stomach. He was planning on going down on me, and the thought made me just about crazy. I knew it wasn’t his favorite thing to do, and I couldn’t wait. Goose bumps prickled my flesh as he kissed my inner thighs. As he got closer to my pussy, he started biting down on my thigh and I loved the feeling. I cried out in what should have been a moan but was almost a growl. He bent down and took my clit into his mouth, nipping gently and then sucking on it. My eyes fluttered closed, and I took a moment to enjoy the sensation.
Matt was a wonderful lover, and he always took care of all my needs. I didn’t have to worry about getting an orgasm with him—he made sure I was satisfied with our lovemaking. Waves of pleasure were consuming my whole body, and I was relieved to let my mind shut off and have my body take over. I was on fire like I hadn’t been for a long time. I could spend all day in bed with Matt when he was like this. Sex was always exciting and tender—exactly what I needed.
He licked at the lips of my pussy, teasing me slightly. He dipped his tongue inside me, causing me to moan loudly. “God, Matt, that feels so good.”
He went back to sucking on my clit while he slipped two fingers inside of my pussy and began pumping fast. He was fucking me so good that I could barely think straight. My breath quickened and I gasped, relishing the feeling of his fingers inside of me.
“Fuck me,” I whispered.
He instantly flipped me on my side and put one of my legs on either side of him before he moved closer to me. He entered me from that position, and his cock went in deep. I moaned loudly as his cock stretched inside me. He pumped inside of me fast and hard, and I adored the feeling. I couldn’t keep up—the moans were escaping me unchecked. God, the man could drive me wild when he wanted to, and I loved every minute of these moments when he was giving me his all.
He didn’t waste any time when he pulled out, and I quickly moved onto my back. I moved over him as he lay down. I wanted him more than ever, and I was going to take what I wanted. My hands went to his chest, and I slid onto his cock slowly. He groaned with enjoyment, and I rode him hard as I moved up and down on his thighs. I smiled down at him sexily, and he looked up at me like I ruled the world. It was intoxicating to be adored, and I loved the feeling. Every time I ground onto his cock, he thrust his hips toward me, meeting each one head on. He was inside of me deep, rubbing against my G-spot, and I could feel an orgasm building inside me. I cried out as the orgasm crashed through me and I soaked Matt's cock.
He sat up slowly, and I knew that he wanted to try another position. I was all for it. I leaned back and braced myself on the bed with my arms behind me. I didn’t get off his cock at any point during our position change. He braced himself up with his hands behind his back while I put one leg on either side of him.
The position was intended to create intimacy between two lovers by positioning oneself close enough to kiss the other person. It was one of my favorite positions; I absolutely loved being so close to him in that way. Plus, it gave us both an excellent view of the other, and I could admire Matt’s sculpted body—it was something to behold. The man was hot as hell, and I couldn’t get enough of looking at his body. I tried as best as I could to keep eye contact with him even as he thrust inside me deep. He felt so good, and I moaned loudly every time he thrust inside me.
I rode his cock, having total control of the speed and intensity of our fucking. It felt so good; I loved the feeling of being in control. It wasn’t something I was used to having in the bedroom as this wasn’t one of his favorite positions. He moved one hand so that he could play with my clit while I fucked him. I couldn't deny he felt incredible, and knowing this was the man I was going to marry definitely upped the intensity.
I closed my eyes as another orgasm took hold of me. I arched my head back, my hair cascading down my back, and felt him spill into me.
We were both breathing heavily. “That was great,” I whispered.
“Yes sweetheart, it was.”
I curled up against him and lay my head on his chest. I couldn’t help but think that ever since Ben brought me to orgasm for the first time it was as if he had awakened something in me. I’d always be grateful to him for that, at least.
We were still lying in bed later that night when Matt brought in some delicious chocolate ice cream so that we could watch the nightly news together. It had sort of become a habit of ours before we retired for the night. To my surprise, while watching the news, I saw Ben on TV and my breath caught. I focused on what they were saying and realized that the news was discussing Ben’s court case and upcoming trial. In fact, they were discussing the fact that there would not be an upcoming trial because Ben had been acquitted of the charges and the case was being dropped.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I felt pure joy about the whole thing and knew that it would take a lot of stress off Ben’s shoulders. I was really happy for him. I felt like jumping for joy at the news but held back because Matt had no idea that I even knew Ben at all. Well, at least now Ben could go back to the company and do what he wanted with it without having the charges hanging over his head.
Matt spoke up, to my surprise. “This guy is a real piece of work. The shit he gets away with is unreal. I wonder how much money it took to get him out of those charges.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I hadn’t realized Matt even knew of Ben or the charges against him. I didn’t like what I was hearing at all though. “What are you talking about?”
“This billionaire—he goes out and poisons the ocean, and somehow he manages to get off scot-free. Amazing. Obviously he knew what was going on—it was his company. I thought for sure they would throw the book at him, but money will buy you out of anything.”
I cleared my throat. “Matt, you don’t know that. You don’t know him at all—how can you be so harsh when you don’t know what really happened?”
He narrowed his eyes at me, confusion clouding them. “Why do you care what I think, sweetheart? It’s not the first time I’ve called someone out on the news. What’s so different about this guy?”
I felt suddenly guilty all over again. I shouldn’t have said anything because he was right. It wasn’t the first time he had talked about someone on the news, and now I just looked defensive. I shouldn’t even be arguing the issue—I no longer had ties to Ben, and he had dropped me without another thought, so why was I defending the guy? I had originally planned on letting go of Matt for Ben, and look how well that turned out. I probably would have lost everything had I made that choice.
“Katie? Is everything okay?”
“Sorry. I actually know Ben. That’s why I spoke up.”
“You’re kidding me. How?”
“Remember how I told you that I went on that AIDS mission a while back?”
He nodded.
“Well, Ben was there.
He was volunteering his time as well. That’s where I met him.”
“Right. I actually heard about that. He did it just to save face after the scandal broke out. It’s funny I never put two and two together before.”
“Well, there’s actually more to the story. I never told you this because I didn’t think it mattered at the time, but while we were there, we sort of had a fling. It lasted a while after as well. I ended things with him, before you and I got serious together.”
He looked at me, shocked. “What are you talking about? I can’t imagine you would be involved with someone like him.”
“Matt, don’t be like that. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t think it was a big deal. You and I had just met, and I was still involved with him. I just didn’t want to hurt you by telling you about the whole thing. It was really nothing.”
“And yet you’re telling me about this now. Why?”
“Well, because of the look on your face mainly. I felt guilty about getting defensive, and, well, I guess I should have told you from the get-go. I would rather we be upfront about everything before we get married, so there are no secrets.”
It was obvious he was pissed at me, and he was probably right to be so. I just didn’t want it to affect our relationship. I had just wanted to be honest with him, but maybe that had been a mistake.
“Katie, I can hardly imagine you with a man like that. I almost wish you hadn’t told me.” He looked so confused that it broke my heart. He was just so good—maybe I didn’t deserve him after all.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you.” I leaned over and kissed him on the lips. I looked into his eyes and said, “I would never do anything to hurt you. So forgive me, please—just don’t be mad at me.”
He sighed. “Katie, I love you, and I’m going to marry you. Of course I forgive you. I just didn’t expect anything like this.”
The Promise of Love Page 10