by Sam Crescent
There was no chance of that happening, and they both knew it.
Drew opened the car door, and she paused, staring at him. “What do you think?”
“I’m surprised they let you join.” She climbed into the car, not knowing what to do. This was awkward. They hadn’t talked since their kiss, nor had she texted him, even though he’d been texting her constantly. She didn’t know what to say to him.
He was her best friend. They had gotten close, and now it felt fucked-up and wrong. The line that neither of them had crossed before had now been crossed, and she didn’t know how to come back from that, or how best to deal with everything.
“I’m still me, Sally. Nothing has changed.”
“Of course everything has changed. You’re not just you. You’re part of the club, and when you’re Prospecting, that comes first. It will always come first. Do you think it’s always like it was on the weekend? Friends, family, those kinds of get-togethers. The married men may not play games with the sweet-butts, but they are still there for those that like to play.”
“Are you jealous?”
No, she really wasn’t. “I hope you’re prepared for everything they’re going to ask of you. This isn’t like a game, or a match. This life, it means something to them, and it doesn’t matter to anyone else. What about your parents?”
“I’ve got an apartment that I’ve already rented, babe. Believe me, I’m already way ahead of you on that score. They’ve disowned me.”
“What?” She looked toward him. “I’m so sorry, Drew.”
“I’m not. I was tired of their bullshitting ways, Sally. You think this is a joke to me, but I can promise you, it’s not. This is who I am, and I want to be part of The Skulls. Sure, they’re loud, and they’re strong, and they don’t give a shit about what society thinks, and all that crap, but I want to be part of that. I’m tired of caring.”
“Okay.” She didn’t have anything else to say, and she didn’t want to bring up the kiss at all.
They traveled in silence, and she didn’t say a word. When he pulled up outside of the gym, she breathed a sigh of relief.
“I don’t regret the kiss,” he said, grabbing her arm.
This made her stop.
“I know you’re in love with Steven.”
She turned to look at him. “Please, don’t say anything else. I … I’ve got to go.”
Sally left, heading inside the gym. She welcomed the distraction of work.
****
Steven looked around the basement of The Skulls trying to help Angel find whatever it was she was looking for.
She’d already been through six boxes full of junk, and was now working on the next box.
“What exactly are you looking for?”
“I want to make a photo album.”
“Can’t you just buy that shit in the supermarket?” he asked.
“No, no, not make something. I have the book, but I want pictures.”
Steven frowned. “Why?”
Angel looked up. She pushed her hair off her face. Lacey had been practicing on all of them, and her blonde roots were starting to show through. It would explain why he found Lacey trying to convince her to go to the salon. Lash had entered and told Lacey to leave his wife alone.
“Why?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Because we’re all a family. Each and every one of us. We’ve lost people along the way, and we’ve gained so many people. This is my entire life. I hated it here when I was first forced into this. I didn’t want any part of it. I hated Lash, and I hated The Skulls. Now they’re my entire world. My babies, my love of all of you. I want to document that in case anything ever happens.”
Out of all of the women, Angel was the biggest surprise. She was the nicest woman he’d ever known, apart from Sally. Angel’s niceness had never been diminished. Her love, her ability to care and give, it brought something to the club. They had all been hardened criminals. Some of them had served time, Gash being the latest. A few minutes with Angel, and that darkness that seemed to fester in all of them dissipated. She had this calming effect on everyone around her.
They were able to see the good in a world that they had thought was not there.
“Lash said I would find everything here or at Tiny’s place. I’ve talked to Ned as well. He’s bringing some pictures. It’s going to be so funny seeing some cute pics of Eva as a baby.”
“I think you just need to look at Tab to see a baby version of Eva.”
Angel hummed. She went back to looking in the boxes. Steven was there as the heavy lifter. Lash asked him to keep an eye on Angel, to make sure she had everything she needed.
“Is everything okay between you and Lash?”
“Yeah, why?”
“I just, I was curious.”
“Oh, he doesn’t like me lifting heavy stuff or doing anything strenuous.” She dumped everything back in the boxes. “I can’t believe how much stuff is here. I thought it would have all burned in the fire.”
“The basement door kept it all safe and secure. It stinks, though.”
“Yeah, it does.” She opened one box, and then giggled. “Oh my, I wonder who forgot about this?”
Her cheeks had gone a bright shade of red.
“What is it?” Steven asked, curiosity getting the better of him as he moved toward her. She held up a long whip in one hand, and a set of fluffy cuffs.
“Is this what I think it is?” Angel asked.
“That depends. What do you think it is?”
“Oh my, Steven, are you blushing right now?”
“You should take a look in the mirror. You’re blushing enough for the both of us. I bet you don’t even know what it is.”
She threw her head back and laughed, and then a really grossed-out expression crossed her face.
“What is it?” Steven asked.
“I just realized that it’s stuffed in a box. What if someone had used it and not washed their stuff? Ew, I really need to wash my hands.” Angel was already heading out of the basement toward the nearest bathroom.
Grabbing the box, Steven made his way up to the main room. Several of the club brothers were there, and when he was sure no kids were around to see what was in the box, he opened it.
“So, Angel and I are looking at our old stuff. Anyone know who this belongs to?” Steven asked, upending the whole box.
“Steven, I can’t believe you did that,” Angel said, rushing forward. “I’m sorry, everyone. He’s not very good at these kinds of things.”
Suddenly, Adam, their British member, stood and made his way toward it. “Been looking for this stuff. I brought it with me, and Tiny said I could store it in the basement. Totally forgot about it. Sorry.”
“Oh my,” Angel said. “Erm, okay, there you go, all found.” She turned on her heel and made her way back toward the basement.
Steven followed but was laughing. “Whose did you think it was?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t think anyone would actually claim it, or at least in front of me.” She took her seat again, and he watched as she paused, pressing a palm to her head.
“Okay, something is going on now. What is it?” Steven asked.
“It’s nothing.”
He stared at her, not really convinced.
She sighed. “I’m pregnant again. That’s all, and the doctor has warned that I need to take it easy.” She reached into another box. “Lash is worried that our pregnancy is cursed, and I’ve told him time and time again not to worry.”
“You are cursed.”
“Look, I’ve been pregnant around the time that bad stuff happens. We’ve been clear for a while, so I don’t see anything going wrong. Now, do you want to tell me what is going on between you and Sally?” She pulled something out of a box, and turned to look at him. “You can’t deny that something is going on.”
“I’m not.”
“Then what is going on?”
Steven sat down, and stared at his friend. Angel, sh
e had a way about her. “I love her.”
“Well anyone can see that.”
“I don’t think she does.”
“Sally’s got to deal with Whizz, and the possible fallout from that. Think of Devil and Tiny. Something bad could happen there.” She shrugged. “I think the biggest problem with the club at times is it doesn’t know when to think properly.”
“What do you mean?”
“This thing with you and Sally, it’s not really a big deal. If she stayed fifteen then I’d understand, but she’s a grown woman now. I was nineteen when I met Lash. There’s nine years between the two of us. I wouldn’t worry so much.”
“You’re not Whizz. You’ve not warned me away from her.”
“What does Sally want?”
“I don’t know. I think she feels guilty because she wants it, too, but Whizz has asked her not to.”
Angel looked at him. “It’s not that complicated. You need to talk to Whizz and Sally. Or better yet, talk to Lacey. She’ll bring Whizz around.”
Steven nodded. “What about Drew? He’s going to be around all the time now.”
“I know. I can only tell you that when the heart wants what it wants, no one can really stand in the way.” She held up a huge stash of photographs. “Found some stuff.”
Steven moved closer and saw one picture of Lash, Nash, and Tate. They couldn’t have been any older than ten.
“Anthony looks like him so much.”
“How is Anthony now?” Steven asked. “I know you were worried about his lack of talking.”
“He’s wonderful. He talks to me all the time now about what he does in school, and what he loves the most. He’ll even read to me while I’m cooking.”
The love on her face made him smile. “I’m glad.”
“I was so worried that something was wrong and that the club life was affecting him. I’m so happy it’s not.”
“Is the box full of photographs?”
“Yes, completely full.”
“Come on, then, let’s get out of this musty basement and somewhere fresh where you can look through everything to your heart’s content.”
Steven couldn’t do anything right now. He followed Angel around instead, grabbing her a drink, and helping out.
She would bend over backwards for every single member of the club. They all adored her, and she was his friend. Sitting at the table, he watched as Adam approached.
“Hey, Adam,” she said. Her cheeks were already a deep shade of pink.
“Hey, Angel, so, erm, I wanted to apologize for what you saw there. Totally inappropriate.”
Angel laughed. “Actually, I didn’t think so. Steven should be apologizing for showing it off to everyone. With it being summer vacation, kids are usually around and playing. He was lucky someone didn’t walk in.”
“I’d just let Adam explain everything to whoever saw it.”
She wrinkled her nose. “That would be … scary. Let them grow up first.”
Chapter Six
The first couple of days had gone fantastic at the gym. Sally liked to keep busy, and she didn’t want to sit around all day doing nothing. It also didn’t help her leg, as it seemed to make it harder to walk on the prosthetic after just sitting all day. Her therapist had told her on one of the last visits that her refusal to accept the prosthetic was what made it hard for her on some days.
Sally, in her act of rebellion, had told her she was full of shit and she could shove all of her bullshit up her ass. Afterward, she’d gone back and apologized, but had also told her that she was done talking about her feelings, and everything else.
Talking didn’t make anything better, and that was where she agreed with Lola about a lot of things. Sinner’s woman, Lola, had been taken by the two clubs’ enemy, known as Master. He was the one also responsible for taking Sally’s leg. She and Lola had found a friendship in their own pain. Sally knew about the kind of pain Lola had been through, and once had told her that at times it was easier to pretend nothing happened, but it didn’t mean pushing it aside was going to make it go away forever.
It was Fighter this time who picked her up and dropped her back at home. The table was already set. Whizz, Lacey, and Daisy were sitting around the table, and they all gave a round of applause when she entered.
“What’s the occasion?” she asked.
“You completed your very first full day of work,” Lacey said.
Sally looked at the food. It looked good. “Did you cook?”
“Not a chance,” Whizz said. “We all wanted to be able to live to see another day.”
Lacey tutted. “I won’t get any better if I don’t practice.”
“Yeah, your practice nearly cost us this house.”
“Again, that was an accident, and I have said sorry. Now, change of subject, how was work?” Lacey asked.
“It was good. I dealt with subscriptions, changed towels, and I even got to go and clean the massage area, which made me nervous.”
“Why?” Daisy asked. “Massages are supposed to be so relaxing.”
“Well, it’s just some silly stuff adults get up to, nothing to worry about.”
Daisy looked at her in shock. “Does this mean you’re an adult now?”
Sally smiled. “Yeah, I guess it does.”
“No, we need you on our team.”
“Sally will always be on your team,” Whizz said.
And this was part of the problem she had with Steven. They were part of this divide.
She needed to change subject again. “I love your hair, Daisy.”
Daisy reached for it, twirling the curls around her finger. “Anthony did it for me.”
Sally laughed. “He did?”
“Yep. I just had to sit still. Tabitha was talking to Simon on the phone, so there wasn’t much to do. He wanted me to read him a story as I did it, so I did.”
“I wonder what Lash has to say about that,” Whizz said.
They finished their food, and she and Daisy did the dishes. “Did I get Anthony into trouble?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“I asked how he did it, and he said he watched Lacey do it, and wanted to do it for me.”
Sally held her arms open, and Daisy hugged her tightly.
“You don’t have to worry about a thing, okay. You’re not in trouble, and you’ve not gotten anyone else into trouble.”
“Are you sure? I feel like I have.”
Sally giggled. “Nah, not at all.”
They finished the dishes, and Sally was tired. She said her goodnights to everyone and made her way upstairs.
The moment she entered her bedroom, she gasped. There on her bed was Steven. She closed the door, engaging the lock that Whizz had given her for privacy.
“What the hell are you doing?” she asked. “They’re downstairs.” She made sure to whisper, not wanting to draw any attention.
“I’ve not seen you in a couple of days, and you don’t text anymore, not for a long time.”
She just stared at him, and then she closed the distance as he stood, and she threw her arms around him. Closing her eyes, she breathed in his scent, marveling at how good he felt. He sank his fingers into her hair, and then pulled back to press a kiss against her lips.
“I’ve been busy with the club, but I’ve wanted to do that for a long time.”
Cupping his face, she traced a finger along his lips, and smiled. Whizz’s earlier conversation came back to her in that moment, and the smile she had faded.
“What is it?” Steven asked.
“Do you want me to move out of here?” Sally asked. “It could help us in a way. You wouldn’t have to sneak into my bedroom window, and you can visit me.”
They sat on the edge of the bed, and Steven held her hands. “What do you want to do?”
“I don’t know. This is … it’s complicated with us, but I think it could be a good thing. I can’t stay here forever, and now I’m working at the gym, and then we can have some space. It could be
what we need.” Even if they did sneak around together. Maybe the time away from home was what she needed.
Steven shook his head. “No. I don’t want you to be away from your family, not to just be with me.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a key. “I’ve got a place, and I’ll pick you up if you want, or I’ll meet you there.”
She stared at the key.
“We can have privacy there, and we don’t have to be quiet, or worry in case someone is listening outside the door.”
Sally took the key from him. “It’s kind of like a secret affair.”
“Not for long. I was talking to Angel today, and she gave me some advice.”
“Angel knows about us?”
“No, she doesn’t know about us, us.”
“Oh.” She stared at the key and held onto Steven’s hand. Suddenly, Drew’s touch came forward, and she knew she couldn’t keep it from him. “Drew kissed me,” she said, looking at Steven.
“When?”
“The day of the water fight. After you kissed me. I … I don’t … ugh … I’ve not encouraged him in any way. I’ve not even been around him apart from this morning when he dropped me off at home.” She got up off the bed, and began to pace the room, ignoring the bite of pain in her knee. Suddenly, she stopped, and turned toward him. “Do you see me as a kid?”
“I don’t. If I did I wouldn’t be inviting you to my place.”
“Is this just about sex?” she asked, holding it up. “Is that what you mean? When I’m there I have to have sex with you?”
Steven frowned. “No. It’s not.” He stood up, moving toward her, and cupped her face, tilting her head back. “With you it’s about so much more. Do you think I’ve pressured you into sex?”
“No, no, I’m sorry. Crap. I’m just … it’s been a long day, and with everything, I’m just feeling a little raw right now. I don’t know what to do. Just ignore me. I’m totally in the wrong right now.”
Time was always ticking, and decisions had to be made.
It wasn’t even a decision with Drew and Steven.
She was hurting because she felt like she’d lost a friend because in her heart, she loved Drew, but she didn’t love him in that way.
There was no one else for her to talk to, and she did feel so alone. If she talked to Lacey, then that would go to Whizz.